MacGyver had always believed that when you died that was it, nothing came after, no heaven, no hell, no thinking no worrying… If he was wrong and this was it for an eternity...well, that'd really suck.
He had no physical sensations other than a bone deep numbness. Was the surgery a half success? Did they save his life only to trap him in his unmovable body? Mac sucked in air, It felt real, was it his imagination?
Mac?
Jack? Is that you? Are you really here? Mac screamed and reached out into the inky void around him. JACK? Don't leave...please don't leave me alone in the dark. Jack, please…
Mac? Hey, c'mon now brother. It's ok, time to get up we're all kinda worried here.
Is it real? Jack, are you real? Jack?
MaaacccGyyyyveerrr
NO NO NO not again. Mac thrashed his body but the cold blackness clung to him like numbing tar. He tried to suck in air, to run, get away….
JACK! Mac wailed.
What the...whoa, brother, easy...Ri catch that arm before he hurts himself. Boze don't bend his knee to the side...umph, yeah I hear you Matty. Damn this kid can fight...Mac? MAC?
A dream it was only a dream, he was alone. Cold, trapped. He pictured a wooly mammoth climbing over another one to get out of the La Brea pit only to pull both of them to tumble into burning tar. Mac screamed. He could feel the burning sword enter at the back of his neck and stab through his entire body along his spine.
Ughmp.
That's it, buddy. C'mon, whoa! Don't let him slip off the bed guys! He's already in enough pieces...
Mac's neck was nailed to the table. Tiny nibbling flames flared through his body, every nerve was on fire. His skin, he could feel his skin. Mac tried to suck in air and pull away from the all encompassing pain buzzing through his muscles. He could feel his body! He could feel it! Mac opened his eyes. Blurred figures ringed him, he could feel their hands on him-searing circles of cramping fire.
"Hnnng." Mac tried to arch away from the overload of nerve noise, but his head was strapped into a collar that allowed no movement of his neck. Mac closed his eyes and moaned trying to roll over, to get away. The lights were too bright and hurt. His head throbbed like a giant alien heart. He tipped and fell forward. Alarmed exclamations came from those circling him. Mac found himself circled in familiar arms. Jack gently lifted Mac up to sitting and sat beside him. Mac couldn't hear through the mess around him.
"Jnnnksya?" Mac's mouth was hardened clay.
"Yeah, brother it's me. You gotta calm down a notch here ok? I know it hurts, that's your nerve center going from 0 to 100 in ten second." Mac didn't get it. He blinked his eyes. His stomach suddenly lurched. He leaned forward huffing in air.
"Hey, Mac, here let it go, it's ok." Mac glanced out the corner of his eyes. Riley held out a puke bowl in front of him. She sat beside him and helped Jack tilt him. Mac rocked moaning at the pain the act of vomiting ripped from his body. He coughed and groaned panting when nothing was left.
"Here, bro." Mac blinked up in gratitude when Boze leaned in and wiped Mac's face with a cool damp rag. Mac managed to twitch the corners of his mouth.
"Nnnksoze." Boze grinned.
"No prob bro, you know what they say…"
"The family that pukes together stays together?" Matty asked amused. Mac turned to look at her. His shoulders slumped and he leaned against Jack. Matty took his hand. Mac sighed. Her small hand was so cool and...calm. Compared the the lightning burning through his.
"I'm glad to see you can follow orders, blondie." Matty smiled and ran her hand along his arm.
"Nah, he always does his own thing." Cage said at Mac's feet. Mac leaned back moaning as his legs began to shake with cramps. "It's ok, Mac, they'll pass in a minute." Cage bent down and began to work the muscles on Mac's left leg. Bozer crossed to the other side of the bed and began to massage his right. Mac gritted his teeth as he automatically reached out to grab Jack's shirt and twist it mercilessly.
Riley scooted in closer and gently rubbed Mac's back careful not to go near his neck. Mac leaned forward closing his eyes. The crackling fire was giving way to muscle aches. Mac took deep slow breaths as he began to feel his body relax. He heard the others talking but the siren call of sleep pulled at him. It occurred to him he was missing something...some…
Mac's eyes snapped open and he pushed himself to sitting. He swung his legs to the side of the bed and almost did a header to the floor. Again it was Jack's lightening fast reflex that saved Mac a lot of pain. Jack frowned taking in the wide blue eyes and sweaty panic on his partner's face.
"Hey, dude, what is it?" He asked gently. Mac pushed back enough to grab both of Jack's forearms.
"Mrrrdc." Jack nodded and let out a breath. He leaned closer and pulled Mac into a one armed side hug.
"Easy, kiddo. You don't have to worry about him." Mac narrowed his eyes studying Jack. His eyes roved to the others.
"He...sheeer." Mac mumbled. The frustration Mac felt with his inability to speak clearer was easily visible in his blue eyes.
"We know, Mac. Jack took care of him for you." Matty said softly putting a hand on Mac's knee. Mac blinked at her and shifted his eyes back to Jack his doubt apparent."
"Yeah, he ain't gonna be hurting anybody for a long while." Jack offered with a grin. Mac raised an eyebrow.
"He's too busy trying to sip his meals through a straw." Bozer said slapping Jack on the back. Mac glanced at Riley who nodded and squeezed Mac's shoulder.
"Jack kinda broke his face. If it hadn't been for him…" The long pause was filled with all of their worry and fears. Jack snorted.
" It wasn't just me, brother. Cage took over in Murdoc's place as you anesthetist." Mac's eyes widened and he gaped at Cage who sat side saddle on the bottom of the bed. She looked down her face pinkening.
"I'm sure I did everything wrong, how else could you survive when the doctors, who are always right about these things, said it was impossible. All my fault, I'm afraid." Everyone stared at her a long minute before bursting into laughter. Bozer wrapped Cage in a warm embrace.
"Girl, if that's how you fuck up, you keep on keeping on." Jack said his eyes moist with gratitude.
"And that is an order." Matty said laughing with the others.
It was three weeks before Mac's neck was healed up enough for the docs to let him fly back home. Mac couldn't stop smiling and barely stopped moving enough to get sleep. Occasionally, his legs would weaken due to transient swelling from the healing tissues around his spinal cord. Mac felt odd phantom sensations. He'd sit up feeling Murdoc standing over him, a knife tip resting on his eyelid. Or he suddenly couldn't breathe. Mac was able to smell and taste the hospital smell of the pillow smothering him, even though there wasn't one. It was as if all the terrors that had been locked in his imobile mind were coming out in physical symptoms. All his fears made real. Mac gritted his teeth and white knuckled through thankful that these terrors passed and the full-color world around him was alive, moving and he wanted to feel, to touch, to walk, run, swim squeeze it for all it's life.
A month after he'd gotten home, he was floating in the center of the pool. The sky was clear blue with stringy grey clouds. Mac closed his eyes and let himself sink into the cool hand of the water that cuddled his body. Sun warmed his bare chest and legs. He knew he would probably end up a bit crispy but he couldn't bring himself to care.
Under the swish of the clear water Mac heard a yell. His eyes bulged and he pulled his legs under him.
"YEEE-HAAAAW!"
"Jack, don…" Mac's words were lost in a sputter as Jack cannonballed three feet from him. The wave washed Mac backwards and under water. Mac swam to the bottom of the pool and waved his hands until the turbulence settled. He could hear Jack's muffled voice. Mac couldn't make out the words, but the cockiness rippled out clearly. Mac smiled. Ok, want to play battleship? Mac knifed upward, grabbed Jack's legs and dragged him underwater. Mac had timed it perfectly. Jack's mouth was open when he was suddenly sucked under. Before the man could recover his surprise, Mac attacked the most efficient way he knew how-tickling.
Over the years, Mac had been sworn to secrecy and for the most part went along with it. One time when they'd gone to visit Jack's grandparents, Jack had teased JP a little too much and ended up face down in dirt being tickled by the master. JP wouldn't let him up until Jack was a rare shade of purple and about to pass out. Mac had noted exactly where his partner was the weakest. Mac never teased Jack or tried to tickle him. Mac, himself had a few spots that would set him into useless puddles of laugher. Jack used them mercilessly. Mac had waited until the time was right-like now.
Jack spasmed in the water like a dolphin caught in a net. Mac spun with him sending out lightening quick scratches until he finally wrapped his arms around Jack and tickled him on his neck. Mac waited until his partner floundered in the water then let go and hauled the older man to the surface.
Jack was a nice violet. Mac held onto his shoulder as Jack laughed until he coughed then broke into sneezes that slapped him face first into the water which made him laugh harder. Mac couldn't help but grin. Finally, Jack managed to heave in a deep breath. He looked at Mac and splashed him with a casual hand of water.
"Good one, kiddo." He sputtered. Mac laughed and used both hands to scoop water and push it into Jack's face. Jack narrowed his eyes, "That's the way it is, huh? Ok, but you asked for it, remember that…" Mac spun and dove. Jack followed like a shark. Neither man knew how long they chased, wrestled and threw each other around the pool. Of course, Jack could have won most of the undersea maneuvers, but he let Mac win. Mac, for once didn't mind.
The sun was a soft peach and painted the clouds above them a cool rose by the time the two men floated their arms resting on the side of the pool sucking in air. Mac rolled onto his back and leaned his head against the metal rail. He rolled his shoulder muscles to relieve a pinch in his neck. He opened his eyes and glanced at Jack. Mac smiled.
"I'm ok, Jack. It just twinges once in awhile. I'm cleared to go back Monday, you know." Jack huffed and growled something under his breath. Mac shook his head. He assumed Jack already knew and would have been interrogating the entire medical staff until someone, Matty or Sally, Mac guessed, put their foot down and shoved him out the door. Of course, Jack would come over and hang out with Mac probably not leaving him alone for an instant the entire weekend. Mac grinned up at the colorful sky above him. He wouldn't have it any other way.
They floated a long time before Mac realized that Jack was studying him.
"What?"
"I'm really, really sorry that happened to you, Mac." Mac frowned and turned so he faced his partner. He reached out a hand and put it on Jack's cool shoulder.
"Why are you sorry? You didn't cause this, I thought I made that clear." Jack looked away, "Jack?"
"Yeah, I know, kiddo. But I didn't do much to help either...Murdoc came right in and…"
"And you broke his face." Mac said softly. Jack shot him a glare, "seriously, Jack. You were the one thing that kept me from losing it." Jack turned and faced Mac. This time Mac looked away. He stared at his pale legs and hand to remind himself they were his and he could move, he could feel the water, the small shifts in tide. Jack's warm hand on his arm broke his reflection.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Jack asked studying Mac with a cocked head. Mac opened his mouth to go to his automatic refusal but paused. His eyes met Jack's and he smiled.
"I'd like that." Jack looked taken aback a second then grinned.
"How about over some beer and steak?"
"Bozer left some marinating."
"Perfect...but Mac?"
"Hmm?"
"No touching the grill." Mac's eyes sparked with mischievousness.
"Oh? Or what?" Before Mac could move, Jack launched at him, grabbed him in a solid hug and planted a long wet kiss on Mac's cheek. Mac squirmed his face turning red.
"What the hell, Jack!" Mac blurted. Jack laughed, his own eyes glittering, "No, no, no…" Mac muttered as he turned trying to escape. Jack followed deliberately.
"Da-dum, da-dum-da dum...dum, dum, dum, dum…"
"Son of a-" Mac managed before Jack dove taking him down to the bottom of the pool. It was full dark before the two sat on the deck in dry clothes eating steak cooked to perfection and sipping beer. Jack set his plate down. It was clean enough to put back in the cupboard. Mac set his half eaten steak down and leaned back taking a long sip of beer.
"This is the life, ain't it?" Jack said staring up at the sparkling stars.
"You have no idea." Mac said. His voice was low accompanied by a full body shudder. Jack frowned and sat on the side of the deck chair. He leaned forward. It hadn't been that long ago, Mac had fallen to the ground lost in tears, overwhelmed by the impending doom. Jack ran a hand over his face.
"How do you feel now?" Mac looked at him puzzled, "About all of it, I mean. I could see how scared you were...and trapped." Jack's throat cut off with lack of air. Mac nodded and looked down as he twirled the bottle in his hands.
"I think that is a vast understatement...I...Jack it was so far beyond afraid, or even terror...it was like someone was pointing a gun at your head and kept pulling the trigger. You know eventually it'll go off and probably kill you so your brain knits every fear you can think of making the dread bigger and bigger. When it does go off, for the quickest fraction of a second you feel relief, it's over. But it's not over, it's never over...you can't escape, or move…"
"Hey, hey. Easy, brother." Mac looked up surprised when Jack took his hands in his own. Mac hadn't realized how fast he'd been breathing until Jack looked at him and started coaching him silently to breath deeper.
"Sorry, Jack, just caught up to me I guess." Jack's knees popped as he stood up and sat beside Mac. He waited for the old age joke but Mac stared intently at his half empty bottle.
"Whatcha thinking?" Mac took another sip then looked at Jack with a warm smile.
"You know I screamed right? When I couldn't move, or talk or anything?" Jack nodded. Mac reached out and punched Jack on the shoulder.
"That's why I love you, big guy." Before Jack could say anything Mac bounced to his feet, scooped up their plates and vanished into the house. Jack watched after him feeling like his heart was going to explode. Jack looked at the lights rippling across the pool. He finished his beer and stood up. His back and muscles hurt like hell. The kid is like a damn eel in the water. Jack took a deep breath enjoying the smell of the neighbor's lilac trees and cut grass. He could see a couple lightning bugs zip through the trees along Mac's drive. Jack nodded. This is life. He turned and studied Mac a long minute.
"Mission done for today." Jack whispered around a smile that wouldn't dim or go away.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
***And I'm back...Thank you all for your well-wishes, prayers and positive energy. As you can probably tell by the mood of this story things went well, still have a half bald head that is sewn up like a baseball. I'm thinking of getting a tat and shaving the other side so I could look Mad Max: Fury Road fierce! LOL. I've got a tingle for a longer, more fun story called Tempest. We'll see how it goes. As always thank you for reading, commenting, liking, following and favoriting. There are only so many angels on earth and I'm convinced they're all fanfic readers. I hope you enjoyed this and I thank you for the space to deal with personal issues, I promise to keep it to a minimum although don't be surprised if Mac has to deal with trying to sleep with a hole in his skull being held on by a super tight pressure bandage. LOL. Thanks, pox
-Jack's Grandfather and all mentions thereof are based on creations of the lovely Ridley C. James. The tickling battles, however, are all on me.