It's that time of the month again! Update time! Unfortunately, Real Life kinda swept me off my feet and proceeded to toss me into the void so there wasn't time for me to do a double update.
Oh well.
Warning: instances of emotional/psychological/verbal and implied psychical abuse and Toxic!Observants
6. A Introspective Moment on Perspective, Part 3: Clockwork and Star
Star's still clinging on to his arms, and Mr. Garcia let her heartbroken wails pierce his arms. He hates how he can count exactly how many seconds pass by before Ms. Lewinski let out another scratchy, raucous, despondent wail. Subconsciously, he holds her against his chest tighter, as a futile attempt to be her shield from whatever was hurting her. No teacher should have to hear their students in so much pain.
But it's better letting it out than holding it in.
"We're almost there."
"It hurts." she cried out.
No teacher should have to hear their students cry out in pain like broken cassette tapes.
Unless, of course, you taught at Casper High, or any school in Amity Park.
Remembering his breathing excersises, Mr. Garcia closes his eyes, took a deep breath, inhaled for four seconds, held it for seven and exhaled for eight. "I know, I know." he said, trying not to let his frustrations show. He felt her grip around his neck tighten; biting his tongue of the biting remark that nearly slipped out. "We're nearly there Star. Almost there, and then you'll be free of your yucky old history teacher."
A watery laugh broke loose. "You aren't yucky." It's the first thing that Star was able to say without it being garbled by her desperate wails. "Probably one of my fav' teach'rs."
The history teacher's heart swelled up with pride as he heard the statement. "You'd say that to any teacher, Ms. Lewinski." he joked.
"No I don'." she declared, pretending to swat him on the shoulder. "In all honesty I don't have many favorites."
'She doesn't have many favorites? Interesting.' Mr. Garcia notes, turning down the corner of a hall and continued to trek the hall until he stops in the entrance of a door. He faked a cough to grab the attention of the woman absentmindedly storing away folders in the file cabinet.
The woman stops, immediately turning around, a deep frown marring her features. "What have I told-oh, Mr. Garcia," Upon seeing him, her frown faded away, and she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "What can I do for you?"
Mr. Garcia jerks his head down at the cheerleader in his arms, "Ms. King, I have a injured student in my arms. She complained that her chest was hurting-"
The nurse looked down at Star, wordlessly gesturing for Mr. Garcia to lay Star on the sterile white bed.
"Student's name?" she asked, her shoes squelching against the tiled floor as she began to rummage through the cabinet.
"Star Lewinski."
Ms. King nodded, now muttering in irritation as she kept sifting through the files. A low 'aha' could be heard as she finally found the file she was looking for; opening the file, she began to read out, "Star Lewinski, age fourteen, weighs one twenty five and has no previous respiratory complications."
"I'm pretty sure I'm not supposed to know her weight." Mr. Garcia mumbled under his breath.
Grabbing a pencil, she began to mark off certain things she noticed while observing Star, "Well, I suggest you keep it to yourself." she suggested, her voice clear, sharp. Ms. King's chocolate brown eyes softened the moment she saw Star curl in on herself, she sat on the edge of the bed, reaching a hand out over the teen's body.
"Star are you okay?" It's one of the most redundant questions that she could ask; anyone with half a brain can tell that Star wasn't okay. Ms. King rested her hand on Lewinsky's arm tenderly rubbing it back and forth. She saw Star shake her head no, and Ms. King sighed. "Are you hurt anywhere else or is it just your chest?"
The nurse felt Star shift around slightly before answering, "No, just my chest."
"Okay then, do you think you can sit up for me?"
Star groans before pushing herself up, repressing a painful moan. Ms. King rose an eyebrow in confusion when she noticed the bright green goop on Star's shirt but paid no further attention as she pulled out her stethoscope; motioning for Star to lift up her shirt halfway-thankfully Mr. Garcia had the decency to look away-and she positioned the diaphragm of the stethoscope on her chest. A sympathetic smile had been flashed when Star flinched when the cold metal made contact with her skin. Ms. King moved the diaphragm around several places, her eyebrows furrowing together before ultimately taking the stethoscope off and placing it aside.
"Odd." She said after a few moments of silence. "Quite odd."
Star pulled down her shirt back down, "What's weird?"
"I didn't hear anything abnormal." Ms. King said, picking up the file and blindly thumbed through it. "However, I can't do anything more with the technology I have in my office."
"Which means?" Mr. Garcia asked, his voice laced with concern.
"Star needs to go to the hospital." She said bluntly. "Mr. Garcia, call her parents and have one of her friends bring her stuff here."
As much as Kwan doesn't want to admit it, he's having a hard time paying attention to today's lesson. Tearing a piece of paper out of his notebook, he folds it into a small triangle and flicks it at Dash, who flashes a irritated glare at Kwan, tightening his grip on the pencil in his hand. The glare softened when Dash stared at Kwan for several seconds, seeing the other football player growing antsy as he stared at the classroom door.
"Hey, she'll be here any minute," Dash whispered in an attempt to calm his best friend down.
Kwan tore out another piece of paper, ripping it in half, and ripped the halves in half, "That's what you said at the beginning of class." he shot back, his knee now bouncing up and down, "It's been nearly an hour, where could she be?"
A smaller hand rested on Kwan's shoulder, gripping it tightly. "Teddy Bear, chill out. Stressing out isn't good for you."
He let out a low groan, "But Paulina-"
"'But Paulina' nothing," warned Paulina, "Stress isn't good for you." She leaned back in her desk to resume writing her notes.
Kwan gave a forlorn nod, trying to concentrate on taking his notes only to stare up at the classroom door, bouncing his knee up and down attempting to quell his growing restlessness. He tapped his fingers on the cover of his binder, folded at least twelve miniature paper footballs and broken three of his pencils. Another twenty-five minutes passed by, neither hair nor hide of Star walks through the door.
Something in Kwan snaps, causing him to shove everything in his bookbag and squeeze his way through narrow desks, determination written on his face. His hand rests on the doorknob, making the motion to turn the knob-
"Mr. Luong, where exactly do you think you're going?"
Kwan stops, not bothering to turn around to look at the teacher. "I'm going to find my girlfriend Ms. Flint." he explained. "She hasn't walked through this door since the bell rang and I'm worried about her."
She tutted in disapproval, "Lewinski right? I know who you're speaking of. A slacker, that girl is. But you know the saying about blondes-"
Gritting his teeth, Kwan bit back a growl hearing Ms. Flint merely imply that Star was nothing more than just a dumb blonde. "I'm sorry but how does that saying go? I don't seem to know how it goes."
"Perhaps if you paid attention Mr. Luong, you would know these things." She replied, pushing several loose strands of brown hair in a tight bun. "Blondes are typically known for their beauty, not for their intelligence. Star is the same way, that's all there is to it."
The class watched on in silence with baited breath as Ms. Flint continued to insult Star. Several students wondered if she was asking for Kwan to kill her. Others wondered if she even knew what she was doing and continued to do it, regardless of how Kwan would react. Either way, no student could ignore how Kwan slowly turned around and leaned against the door. Broad shoulders tautly slumped down as he arched an eyebrow while he listened to Ms. Flint natter on.
"How much longer do you think?" Whispered a student.
"I'd bet not too much longer." Another whispered back. "I hope he gives her what she deserves."
"Getting jumped?"
"No, he's a-"
A startling whoosh interrupted the scattered whispers and Ms. Flint's incessant, degrading nattering. Looking at her phone, she thumbed to her most recent notifications; her lips curving in a slight frown as she read them.
"Sanchez, Loung, Baxter, grab your belongings and go get Lewinski's things out of Mr. Garcia's room and go to the nurse's office."
Kwan bursts through the door, heavy breathing and stalks down the hallway, the squeakiness of Dash's shoes and muted thumping of Paulina's flats following after him.
Someone should have told Clockwork that aimlessly running through Amity Park without a sense of direction would have done nothing more than tire them out unnecessarily. Well, someone that cared. But no one cares, thus, no one tells them.
Out of breath, Clockwork leans against the brick wall of the alley they've been sitting in and slides down into the oily grime of the concrete. Resting their head against the wall, the Time Master began to catch their breath, chest slowly rising and falling. Running a hand through blue hair, they began to thump their foot against the concrete, thrum their fingers against black shorts as they began contently hum a nonsensical melody. The nonsense and randomness behind the melody provided Clockwork a sense of comfort that they never had; soothing and simple, it began to lull them into a peaceful sleep.
"You made us waste valuable resources, time that we can not get back searching for you and where is it we find you? In a backway alley hiding with trash," a voice drones in; slow, harsh and deliberate. "The Observants take care of you and this is how you repay us? By disrespecting us and doing what you want without considering what you do affects us?"
The melody stops and Clockwork flinches.
"Stand up."
Clockwork begins to stand, their calloused fingers pulling at the hem of their shorts. Head bowed down, blue hair covers their vision, biting the urge to resist or yelp when the Observant yanks them up by their wrist, "By the Ancients you take forever to do anything, it's always us who has to take the initiative for everything you do. Do you know how screwed you would be if we hadn't been there?"
'I'd be dead?' "No." Clockwork mumbled out.
"You would be dead."
'I thought so.'
The Observant tightened its grip on Clockwork's wrist, narrowing its eye when the Time Master grunted out in pain. "Don't say anything. I don't want to hear your pathetic excuses or lies," it said before mumbling crossly, "Make me sick of how you constantly do this to us, this is utterly ridiculous."
With a lazy wave of its hand, a bright green portal popped into existence; the Observant tossed Clockwork over its shoulders before floating inside, the portal soon shrinking and disappearing with a quiet 'pop.'
Eterna flicked her tail in concern as she waited for Allsi to return with Clockwork. She was just about to flip through one of the Time Master's books to ease her mind when she heard a portal appear, her eye at first narrowing in confusion when she saw Allsi float in with a human kid laying over his shoulder before it widened in relief as her co-worker merely dropped the kid on the floor.
"Where was he?" She asked, reaching a hand out as if she was going to aid him.
Allsi closed the portal behind him,letting out an aggrieved sigh as he began to speak, "You'll never guess where."
Her hand lowered, turning her curious gaze from Clockwork to Allsi, "Where was he?"
Another aggrieved sigh came from the male Observant and Eterna had barely noticed Clockwork flinch. "He was hang-hiding in Amity Park, somewhere in an alley, sitting in trash." Allsi spat out, floating around between the other two ghosts. Pinching his nonexistent nose, he groaned aloud, dramatically throwing his hand out emphasizing his frustration. "Do you not understand how much you made us worry for you Clockwork?"
Clockwork blinked, their bottom lip wobbling as they attempted to speak, flinching when Allsi teleported in their face, his eye narrowed in anger, roughly pushing their shoulder and muffled their cry to a muted whine. "Answer me when I talk to you!" He shouted shrilly, ignoring the Time Master subtly covering their chest.
Allsi smushed several of his bony fingers against Clockwork's nose, his enraged frown only deepening as he heard the child inhaled a shaky breath. "I'm going to ask you again and this time I expect an answer, do you understand me?" Seeing them nod, he let out a bitter laugh as he floated back a few inches once again gesturing to himself and Eterna, "I don't think you understand what you do to us, the ghosts who have been supporting your entire afterlife when you do stupid, and I mean absolutely stupid, idiotic things such as this. All we want is some respect and this is how you repay me? This is how you repay Eterna? This is how you repay the Observants? By pulling stunts like this? Don't you understand how you hurt us when you run off to who knows where?"
"...Yes?"
Allsi scoffed, turning around so that Clockwork couldn't exactly see what he was planning to do next. "Eterna?"
"Yes?" She looked up from the book she was thumbing through, promptly slamming it shut.
He looked from Clockwork, before huffing out in irritation, "Don't you think that if he understood what he was doing, that he would stop this?"
Eterna nodded her head, "Of course, it's the only sensible thing to do."
"But he hasn't stopped, hasn't he?"
"No," she said slowly, "He hasn't."
Looking back at Clockwork's shaking form, he held back a growl, "Stop that." he commanded, rolling his eye when the child hadn't stop and was still shaking their leg. "I said stop that."
Flinching, Clockwork tried their best to stop their body from shaking, instead focusing their nervousness on one hand pulling the hems of their shorts while the other hand sifting through blue hair. "Yes sir."
Eterna floated forwards, resting a hand on Allsi's chest, "Calm down, you're overworking yourself."
"I can't! Not when I know that Clockwork's pulling dangerous, reckless stunts like this. Just-" Rubbing his temples, Allsi removed her hand off of his chest, straightening his slightly wrinkled robes.
Eterna took a deep breath, no longer facing him but instead looking directly at Clockwork. "Were you not told you could not leave this tower unless you had business down there and you had received permission from us to conduct said business?" she questioned, lips pursing in a thin line when Clockwork nodded. "If you know that then what made you decide that it was okay to do this against our wishes?"
Averting their gaze away from the two, Clockwork hugged their knees closer to their chest, subtly rocking themselves as they mumbled out, "I had business to conduct."
"Business to conduct," Eterna repeated to herself, making sure to enunciate each word slowly so that the all three ghosts could hear. "Just exactly what business you had to conduct was so important that deluded you to think it was alright to disobey our wishes?"
"Look at me when I'm talking to you," she ordered, observing how Clockwork flinched, "Put your hands down, only guilty people do all that fidgeting with their hands."
"Yes ma'am." answered Clockwork, placing their hands in front of their chest.
"Now answer me, what business that you had to conduct was so important that deluded you to think it was alright to disobey our wishes and make you think that we would be okay with it?"
"I already did it, so it d-doesn't matter." Clockwork stuttered out.
Eterna lowered her hand before covering her mouth, choking out in silent laughter. "You already did it so it didn't matter? So it doesn't matter how you caused us to worry?"
She didn't bother letting Clockwork speak as she spoke once again. "Of course it didn't. It never does! You have never paid attention to how we treat you with the utmost care."
"You were the reason I stopped living," Allsi cut in, his voice low and quiet. "The reason Eterna stopped living, the reason every single Observant has stopped living. We weren't going to let anyone, ghost or human, hurt you in any shape, form, or fashion. You are our purpose for living, the only thing that keeps us going. We live for you, hell you could even say we live through you. Nothing's going to stop us from doing that because we care about you. But when you do things like this, it's like you're basically saying "Fuck you," and that hurts."
Clockwork's silent, still unsure on what to say.
"But you don't care about that do you?"
"I do."
"Clockwork, how can you say you care? With the way you act, the way you treat us?" Allsi soon fell quiet before musing aloud, "Do you know how much you hurt me when you do this?"
"No."
"It's to the point where I have to scream at you in your face, when I want to choke you so badly because that's how much you hurt me when you do this."
'Well why don't you choke me now? That way I can't hurt you anymore, if I run out of breath then I can't be a burden to anybody.'
They're suddenly struggling to breathe, brown eyes dilated in hysteria as they kicked and flailed desperately to get away. Green hands tightened their grip. Glancing over to their other guardian, unshed tears brimmed at the corner of their eyes,
"I-I can't breathe," they choked out, "Help me please."
The other Observant doesn't move; a stony, unaffected glance before shifting its focus away from them.
Current rundown of what Kwan understands is going on: Nathan had bumped into Star which caused her to have a panic attack. Mr. Garcia heard her scream out, and being the wonderful teacher he was, carried her up to the nurse's office. Ms. King tried her best to assess what was going on but with the limited technology that Casper High had to offer restricted her from making the best diagnosis she could discern.
Which is why he's sitting in Amity Park Hospital, waiting for her parents to come. Dash and Paulina sit on opposite sides, both of them slumped down in the chairs. Her parents rush in, concern etched in their faces and a doctor arrives in the waiting room, walking the five to his girlfriend's room.
The three teenagers, Star's parents and the doctor all squeezed themselves in the cramped, stuffy room. Kwan taps his foot in anticipation, not wanting to be held in suspense any longer.
It turned out, the doctor had explained to the group, Star was currently suffering from psychosomatic pains, explaining why she felt she was in an extraneous amount of pain despite the fact the cheerleader was physically healthy.
Good news, she was going home tomorrow morning. Bad news? There was nothing that could be done about the psychosomatic pains.
Kwan stares at Star with evident concern on his face, blankly watching as everyone else fretted over his girlfriend. About an hour later, everyone else had left out, the couple now silently staring at each other. The football player crawled into the bed; carefully as to not cause her to spiral into another fit of pain, Kwan slipped his hand around her waist and pulled her into his chest, effectively spooning her.
Silence reigned over the two as Star plucked at the hairs on Kwan's arm while he ran his hands through her soft hair.
Clockwork's having a hard time breathing, their wrist hurts (and from the way it was bent at an odd angle, they had to assume it was broken.) Well, everything hurts, but in all honesty there wasn't anything that could be done about it. Slightly calloused hands grabbed hold of the lowest tree branch, and began to climb up several branches, ignoring the sudden pain that shot up in their wrist.
Laying down on a branch they deemed high enough, Clockwork pulled their hood over their head and fell into an uneasy sleep.
I know how jarring it must have been to read Clockwork's sections of this chapter. Believe me, I know. It took me closing out my Google Docs several times and pacing around my house to write it. When I first decided to write this part, I knew it would be at the very least uncomfortable to write but as Real Life happened, making this chapter hit closer to home than I wanted it to.
...That's enough rambling. Anyway, I'll see you next chapter. Thanks for reading.