Chapter 2 - 1994

It had been 12 days since Sirius' escape from Hogwarts. His seclusion had given him ample time to think about everything from Harry, to Hogwarts, to dementors, and of course Remus. The latter occupied the majority of his thoughts as Sirius let himself remember everything about him for the first time in 12 years. Azkaban had drained him of all the good memories of course, so that all was left was the shame of what he had done, but having actually seen Remus in the flesh; they were now ever so slowly coming back to him.

It was just a little at first, a flash or a picture or something sweet one of them had said to the other, but soon he hadn't been able to stop the rush of memories playing out in his mind like a private movie. To his surprise Sirius now found himself smiling more often than not despite the rather dismal situation he now found himself in, however he was yet to work up the courage to actually get in contact with the man, or anyone else for that matter.

He had stayed well hidden, changing location sometimes twice a day. He spent a lot of time as Padfoot because it just seemed easier, and he made sure Buckbeak was well cared for too. Although it was by no means pleasant Sirius embraced the freedom his new life offered. He had come to terms with it and he was OK with it. Besides it wasn't about him, it never had been; Harry and Remus were all that mattered to him now.

With all of this in mind, Sirius (as Padfoot) crept into a quiet wizarding village near the Scottish Borders. It was the dead of night, and it was the closest to Hogwarts he'd come since that first cave, and the closest he dared to. He was about to leave the country for a while but first there was something he had to do. After observing the village for a couple of days to get the layout of the streets and clock the comings and goings of the villagers it was time to complete his task. The Owlery lay at the end of the second alley on the right, the owner of which slept in an apartment above. There was a hatch in the yard behind that led to the cellar; all he needed was some parchment, some ink and an owl.

Getting inside the small building was easy enough, as was obtaining the parchment and the ink, which he slipped into a small leather pouch he carried around his waist. It was the owl that proved most difficult. For obvious reasons, mainly apposable thumbs, he couldn't change back into the dog, and the well trained and intelligent birds knew something wasn't right as soon as the door creaked open. As he lifted the smallest sleeping owl from her perch, trying his hardest not to disturb her, one of her companions let out a loud hoot of alarm. He made for the hatch as quickly as he could, clambered up the steps, but just as he felt the cold sting of the night air, something or someone grabbed his foot.

He turned around sharply to find a plump old man, face scarlet and striped pyjamas askew. There was no sign of recognition to show he knew who Sirius was, but he was clearly livid that he was being robbed. Sirius noticed that the man did not have his wand on him. Thinking quickly he used his free hand to grab his own wand, firing it at the man, and silently casting the first spell that came to his mind. The man let go of him to jump out of the way, they both lost their balance and tumbled back down the steps together, and as they landed in a heap at the bottom the owl broke free of Sirius' grasp. He fired another spell at the shopkeeper, this time hitting him square in the chest. The man froze, and then crumpled to the ground. Sirius inched closer to make sure he was still alive.

"No hard feelings," Sirius said as he backed away, "It should wear off in a few minutes."

Once he was clear of the little shop Sirius ran as fast as his legs could carry him, out of the village, into the woods, over the "bridge" that was actually a log and into the hollow that was his temporary hideout. He set the pouch on a large boulder and turned back towards the opening to cast his protective charms. Only then did he let himself collapse on the ground, struggling to catch his breath. That had been too close.

Sirius woke early the next morning, momentarily feeling warm and safe from the large wing that covered him. He knew he couldn't linger, the Owlery owner would have told the other villagers of the break in, and once they realised he wasn't one of their own they would come looking for him. He only hoped his enchantments would hold long enough for him to do what he had to do. There was still the problem of finding an owl, but for now he had a parchment and ink, and thanks to Beaky, a quill.

Dear Harry,

He began the first letter, pausing, quill hovering inches from the parchment.

I hope this finds you before you reach your Aunt and Uncle. I don't know whether they're used to owl post.Buckbeak and I are in hiding.

And that's as far as he got when he heard the sound of distant voices. Without hesitation he gathered his few belongings, woke Buckbeak as gently as he could so as not to startle him and climbed on.

"We need to go," he whispered.

Buckbeak ducked out of the hollow and took to the air, flying as high as he could as quickly as he could so as not to be seen. They flew for some 20 miles before Sirius finally gave the OK to land on a large outcrop at the edge of some hills, the nearest civilisation out of sight on the other side of them. Once they had landed Sirius scouted for somewhere safe to hide, and found that beside the rocks was a small burn that flowed down through the wild undergrowth and meandered until it came to a sort of underpass. As he and Buckbeak were settling in Sirius spotted something move out of the corner of his eye. It was a small injured owl; at least it appeared to be injured as it hobbled along the ground. When it suddenly sprung into the air and made to escape Buckbeak blocked its path with his outstretched wings. The owl fell and Sirius caught it in his arms.

"Sorry," he said, "but I have a job for you."

Sirius read over the completed letter to his godson. He had explained that he thought the dementors were still chasing him and that he planned to let himself be sighted far from Hogwarts so that the security would be lifted. He told him that Harry's Firebolt was a 13th birthday present from him, and he apologised for frightening him the summer before. He also enclosed a permission slip for Harry to visit Hogsmeade, and suggested Ron might like to keep the owl seeing as he didn't have a rat anymore.

It wasn't anywhere near everything he had wanted to say, but there would be plenty of opportunities to say more in the future, and he didn't want to come across too strong. So he had kept his message light hearted, and hoped that Harry knew he could come to him if he ever needed his help. And now that that letter was finished, there was one more he had to write, and this one was going to be far more difficult.

With the wages he had earned from his one year of teaching at Hogwarts, Remus had managed to buy himself a small secluded lodge near the south shore of England. It was secluded enough that there was no need to worry about monthly disturbances. After everything that had happened at the end of the school year Remus was glad of the solitude, like Sirius it had given him time to think. Unlike Sirius however, Remus was not reliving happy memories, he was trying to convince himself that no matter what he might feel about the man he once knew, he had to put Sirius out of his mind. It was easier said than done of course; it seemed that he was constantly engaged in an internal battle with himself.

He's innocent, it wasn't his fault!

But he's still a convict, he's on the run!

He looked so different, like a mere shadow of his former self. I wish I could help him.

I can't help him, what have I got to offer?

And so it continued, round and round in his head for almost two weeks, until it nearly drove him crazy. That's when it had arrived: Sirius' letter.

My Dear Moony, it had began.

Words cannot express how incredible it felt to see you again after all those years, and words cannot explain how sorry I am for the pain I have caused you.

As you will have guessed I am in hiding, and will be leaving the country as soon as I can.

Before I go I have one request: Forgive Me.

I know you and I can never be what we once were, no matter how much my heart yearns for it, but in all the years that I spent in that dreadful place only one thought kept me from losing everything: that once upon a time, you loved me.

I cannot and will not ask anything more of you, and I don't even know if I will ever hear from you or see you again. Keep safe Remus.

Love,

Padfoot.

Tears fell from his eyes as Moony clutched the letter to his chest, he had read it over and over.

"I forgive you," he whispered.