Chapter 4 – 1994

Two month had passed, and Sirius had never received a reply from his letter to Remus. He had no idea where his friend was, how he was doing, or if he had even received the letter in the first place. He had indeed left the country, just as he said he would, never staying in one place for long before moving on to somewhere new. He had started to accept that this was going to be his life now; constantly on the run with a Hippogriff as his only companion. That was until he received Harry's rather alarming letter.

His words had started off lightly enough, something about his overweight cousin and some muggle contraption, but then he had mentioned that his scar was hurting again, and that he thought it might mean something to do with You-Know-Who. Sirius agreed, so he scribbled his reply hastily on the spare bit of parchment Harry had kindly sent with Hedwig.

Harry -

I'm flying north immediately. This news about your scar is the latest in a series of strange rumours that have reached me here. If it hurts again, go straight to Dumbledore - they're saying he's got Mad-Eye out of retirement, which means he's reading the signs, even if no one else is. I'll be in touch soon. My best to Ron and Hermione. Keep your eyes open, Harry.

Sirius

Flying north was a bit of an understatement, but he figured that by the time Hedwig reached Harry he'd be safely hidden somewhere in the UK. You see he had indeed heard strange rumours, even here in, well he wasn't quite sure where he was anymore. Wherever it was he had found a small British Wizarding Colony and had been sneaking in as Padfoot for supplies, and had overheard Dumbledore's name on more than one occasion. Intrigued he had hung around longer than intended, just to find out what people were saying, and it hadn't been pleasant. At least Harry would be safe for now with the Weasley's, which was of some small comfort.

When he returned to the country Sirius was greeted, to great surprise, with a letter from Albus Dumbledore himself. He was horrified as he read of the events that had occurred at the Quidditch World Cup Final, and even more so Harry's involvement in them! He was so shocked by the news that he hadn't even noticed the second page at first. It was only as he hastily stuffed the parchment into his bag, and the parchment fell to the floor that he realised there was more to the message.

PS In light of these events I fear for your safety. Harry has informed me that you are returning to the country; therefor I have arranged a safe place for you to stay. The location is well protected and I am sure you will be in good company.

And at the very bottom of the page was an address, or rather a series of addresses and instructions on how to travel safely to the final destination. A safe place? Sirius wondered. He didn't recognise any of the locations described, but he trusted Dumbledore, so he gathered his things and set off at once.

It was a long and rather complicated journey, and Sirius was sure he was constantly going back on himself or at the very least in circles, but he supposed that was the point. His final destination was a small cottage at the edge of a forest. It looked almost abandoned save for the signs of a warm fire inside; crops growing off to one side; and if you looked really closely a well-travelled trail leading from the back of the building into the woods themselves. Who actually lived here was anyone's guess.

Taking a deep breath Sirius knocked on the door. He could hear movement inside, and then the door opened. Sirius' mouth fell open.

"Remus?"

His voice croaked from lack of use.

Remus simply smiled at him. "Well don't just stand there gaping at me, get in."

He motioned for Sirius to follow and then stood aside to let him enter. Sirius was hesitant at first but was lured by the warmth and the smell of something delicious roasting in the kitchen. Once he was inside Sirius looked at the man before him.

"I don't understand, what…?"

"When the attack happened at the Quidditch World Cup Dumbledore contacted me immediately, asking if I had heard from you. When I explained you had left the country he assured me you would return, and he was right, here you are. I was more than happy to offer my home to my dear old friend of course."

Sirius took all of this in, a number of questions coming to his mind all at once, but what he actually found himself asking was "So you got my letter then?"

Remus smiled, and tried to fight the light tinge that coloured his cheeks as he nodded. He refused to say any more. The letter had brought back feelings for Sirius he had fought too long and too hard to forget, and he refused to let them resurface. Just because Sirius was now going to be living in his home didn't mean he was going to let him back into his heart.

"Are you hungry?" He asked instead.

Sirius understood the dismissal.

"Starving," he replied.

He followed Remus into the kitchen where he found a large oak table set for two. Two large glasses of butterbeer were set at either end, and as Sirius took his seat Remus served him the roast. He hadn't tasted anything like it in longer than he could even remember. As his food digested he allowed himself a moment to actually think about this surprising turn of events, and he knew that although things were certainly going to be pretty awkward between the two of them for a while, just being with Remus really did make him feel safe. Being with Remus had always made him feel safe.

1973

The sight of the bright red engine was just as exciting now as it had been two years before. Sirius was about to start his 3rd year at Hogwarts. The summer would have been, once again almost unbearable, had it not been for Remus. His friend's frequent owls laden with letters and gifts had been his one saving grace. Although he himself had had as much fun as a clown at a funeral, it had been great to hear about his friends' exciting holiday to the Maldives and the mischief he had gotten up to at James'. But what had really kept Sirius going were Remus' constant words of encouragement.

Sirius had been unable to meet with his friends at all this summer. When James' Dad had floo called to invite Sirius over to stay for a couple of days the two fathers had ended up in a heated argument, and as a result Sirius had been banned from leaving the house. He had hoped the ban would have been lifted so that he could at least go to Diagon Alley, but his mother had picked up all his school supplies when she had gone with Regulus instead. By the time the 1st of September finally came around Sirius felt like he was losing his mind, and those words of encouragement had been the only thing keeping him going at all.

"Wow Sirius, you look awful!"

"Nice to see you too James," Sirius said sarcastically, but there was no stopping the grin that spread across his face as he embraced his best friend in a hug. "Ready for another year?" He asked.

"Sure am, just need to wait on Remus and Pete and we're all set to go. You won't believe the prank I have lined up for the journey! I figured we could get a head start, seeing as McGonagall will be watching us like a hawk once we get to school."

"Sounds like a plan. Hey look, there they are now!"

Remus and Peter were making their way towards them through the crowds on the platform, laughing at something funny one of them must have said. Sirius felt a fleeting flutter in his stomach that he took for excitement at seeing his friends again after months apart. As the boys' neared however, Sirius felt his smile falter. Something wasn't right; Remus was limping slightly, and holding his arm at an odd angle.

"What happened?" He asked immediately.

"I think the words you are looking for are 'Hi Remus, it's good to see you.'"

Sirius looked at him sheepishly. "Right, of course. Hi. Are you OK?'

"I'm fine, just a broom accident, nothing to worry about."

It was pretty clear from the look on his face that Remus wanted to drop the subject, so Sirius tried to let it go, even if he wasn't fully satisfied with his story. Throughout the journey to Hogwarts he kept an eye on him and Remus wasn't sure what to make of it. There wasn't just curiosity behind that look, there was something else too.

Remus knew that Sirius was a good friend who really cared about him, and he hadn't forgotten how Sirius had confided in him either. He'd never experienced that before; as a child he had always been the one that needed the support of others. He had been determined that he wasn't going to be that dependant little boy at Hogwarts. No one knew of his affliction, and so he had worked really hard at being the boy he had always wanted to be. At first it hadn't been easy, but he soon found that the more time he spent with his friends (and for some reason when he was with Sirius in particular) the easier it seemed to become, and in the end he was the one making someone else feel safe.

He supposed his connection with Sirius was because he saw much of himself in him; the secrets and the desire to be someone new. That was why he had written to him so much over the summer; he hadn't wanted Sirius to feel alone of course, but talking to Sirius had actually made him feel safe too. As he watched his friend who had now fallen asleep and was dozing lightly beside him, he wondered just how safe he was with Sirius, with all of his friends. Keeping his secret was a heavy burden to bear, and maybe, just maybe, he didn't have to bear it alone. He wondered if it was time to share his secret.