Bilbo was stunned. Thorin had kissed him on the forehead. He had actually kissed him. Of all of the things he expected to happen when they had their talk, that wasn't one of them.
It took several minutes for his astonishment to wear off. Once it did, he mulled over what Thorin had revealed to him.
He wasn't sure of what to think about him choosing not to hold back his feelings. Nevertheless, he could not say that he was opposed to the idea of it. It didn't upset him when Thorin called him Ghivashel. After all, he had found himself blushing the last time he did. It didn't bother him when he realized that Thorin had feelings for him either; he himself had never been attracted to women. Plus, Thorin had also saved his life on the evening of the Thunder Battle.
Bilbo couldn't say that he felt anything other than gratefulness to Thorin at the moment, but it was quite possible that he may over time, for the reasons given. The only question was what was the best way to handle the situation.
On one hand, he could let Thorin show him his affections and see how things went from there. He would ask Thorin to take things slowly and not be too pushy if he decided to do this. On the other hand, he could tell Thorin to leave him alone, as he was unable to reciprocate his feelings for the time being.
The more Bilbo pondered this, the more he found himself leaning towards the first choice. He didn't know why, nor could he believe that he was. He felt that he was agreeing to the idea of it too quickly. Still, something told him that it wouldn't hurt.
And if he didn't feel anything for Thorin after a certain amount of time, at least he would know that a romantic relationship wouldn't work between them. He just hoped that they could have a good friendship if that was to be so, and that Thorin would be content with that.
With that in mind, Bilbo stood and headed back inside Beorn's house. He wished to think this over some more.
XXX
Bilbo kept to himself for the rest of that morning and a good part of the afternoon. When he wasn't having his meals, he was exploring the fields and gardens. He even tended to a few. Beorn was pleased when he noticed this and showed him where his gardening tools and watering can were.
"You may use those during your stay, if you like. Remember to put them back once you are finished," he said.
"Thank you. I will," Bilbo remarked.
Thorin saw that Bilbo was occupied and chose to let him be. He felt that he ought to anyway. It would give him time to alone and ruminate on things.
From what he could perceive as he watched him, Bilbo didn't seem angry, but he now wondered if kissing him was a good idea. However, he didn't question his decision about telling him that he wasn't going to hide his feelings for him. He meant what he had said.
He stood up and left his room with a sigh. He would worry about this later. There were other things that he needed to do.
Most of the Company roamed around the fields also, a few watching Bilbo as he gardened. However, if the latter or Thorin knew that they especially stared at him when he was leaning over, it wouldn't have been pretty. As it was, Balin, Dwalin, and Gandalf were discussing when they would leave Beorn's house with the said Dwarf king, and which direction they would go after they did. Bilbo was too preoccupied to notice anything but the plants.
Other than that, the rest of the day passed by without incident. It was good to have some leisure time. They hadn't had any since they had left Rivendell.
Bilbo had made up his mind about whether to accept Thorin's affections or not by the time he finished eating supper. He decided to give it a chance, but only on a few conditions. He still just hoped that Thorin would be amenable to them.
XXX
After waiting for the Company and Gandalf to fall asleep later that evening, he went to Thorin's bedroom and knocked on the door lightly. It was quiet; Bilbo wondered if he was asleep.
Much to his surprise, though, he heard footsteps approach before Thorin opened the door. He looked quite alert.
"Yes, Bilbo?" he inquired somewhat apprehensively.
Bilbo could see how nervous he was and smiled. "Don't worry. I'm not here to shout at you. I'm not upset about what you said or about you kissing me...if that's what you're thinking," he assured him.
Thorin sighed in relief. "Well, that's...that's good. I was afraid that you were, and that I had offended you."
"No...but you did take me by surprise. May I come in, please? I want a brief word with you."
"Of course you can."
Bilbo entered the room and shut the door. He didn't want the Company or Gandalf to overhear him if they happened to be awake. He hadn't seen any of them when he made his way to Thorin's room, but still.
He cleared his throat as he faced him again. "Now, before I tell you what I have to say, I just want to let you know that you are right about me not having feelings for you in return. I don't at the present time...but I am willing to give you the opportunity to show yours for me."
Thorin nodded and motioned for him to continue.
"I don't mind that you want to express yours for me, but I would prefer that you take your time and go slowly. I've never been involved with anyone in this manner before, so this is quite new to me. Because of that, I would like us to get to know each other more and go on from there.
"If we get along well and everything works out, I'm sure I would be happy if we were to court one another. But if it doesn't, I hope that you and I could be friends-or on good terms-at the very least," Bilbo concluded.
A smile spread across Thorin's face. "That sounds quite fair. I have no complaints about us taking our time. All I want is to do right by you and not treat you the way I had before."
Bilbo inclined his head. "I promise to do right by you also. And please let me know if I offend you or say or do something that you are opposed to, as far as your customs go. Just don't go into the subject of my clothing, please."
"Very well. I shall try not to, and I ask that you do the same when it comes your customs."
"Oh, I will. You can count on that."
Thorin chuckled, but Bilbo could see that he took him seriously. He actually laughed a bit as well, then sighed after a moment.
"I suppose I ought to go to bed now. I'm beginning to feel exhausted."
He nodded a second time. "All right. Sweet dreams, then, Bilbo."
"Same to you. Good night."
With another smile, Thorin reached out to squeeze his hand. Bilbo actually grinned a little himself as his cheeks reddened. Then they inclined their heads to each other one last time before Bilbo left and went to bed.
Back in his room, Thorin was looking hopeful. Everything seemed promising since Bilbo obviously didn't mind that he kissed him, but he didn't want to count his chickens before they hatched all the same.
XXX
It was so hot the next day that Thorin, the Company, and Gandalf decided to stay inside before the morning was halfway over. However, Bilbo-who was used to working outside in all types of weather-was helping Beorn with the gardening and his other outdoor chores.
Thorin found it somewhat difficult to not be irritated when he noticed that Bilbo was working without his jacket. His shirt was unbuttoned and his sleeves were rolled up again as well. He knew that Bilbo technically was not under-dressed, even if he was to him and his Company, so he tried not to mind it. It would be imprudent for him to be wearing a coat in this kind of weather anyhow.
Still, imagining the others simply even looking at him because of this made him quite jealous. It partly made him want to go out and tell Bilbo to put his coat on despite the heat. But he would be upset if he did that and likely declare that he had "gone absolutely mental" once more.
Other than that, Thorin was watching with awe and interest as Bilbo continued to garden. He watered and pruned the flowers with a tenderness he had never seen before, except for when it came to his sister Dís. (Fíli and Kíli often given her flowers when they were children.) He did not care for them, but he could understand why Bilbo loved them. Many of the flowers were admittedly beautiful.
That was when Thorin remembered something that Bilbo said once, about Hobbits giving one another flowers when they were courting.
He wondered if Bilbo would mind if he gave him some. Not courting flowers, but flowers that expressed his wish to be his friend first, and his desire to become more than that as time passed.
There was one problem, however. He didn't know much about flowers or their meanings, except for red roses. He had no idea of what kinds to gives Bilbo.
The only ones who knew about them were Balin and Ori, since they had read books about many things, especially the cultures and customs of Men and Elves. They knew very little about Hobbits, though, since they had never been around them. Very few stories were told about them.
Since Thorin knew that Ori would be suspicious if he asked him about flowers, he chose to speak to Balin about them instead. He knew that the latter wouldn't mind telling him which ones were the best to give to Bilbo.
When he found him in another room, he pulled him to the side and asked to have a word with him in private.
"Of course, laddie. What is it you would like to discuss with me?" Balin inquired once they were alone in the dining room.
He listened quietly as Thorin explained his situation and rose his eyebrows in surprise afterwards. Of all things, he never expected Thorin to ask him about flowers. He usually didn't notice them, as far as he could tell. Nevertheless, he felt happy for Thorin and hoped that everything would work out well for him and Bilbo.
"I understand, laddie, and I have no problem with helping you. I can tell you the names of the flowers now, but we will have to wait to see if Beorn has any of them in his garden. It's too hot outside. Even then, I don't know if he will let you pick them."
He gave him the meanings of yellow and dark pink roses, alstroemerias, anemones, asters, hydrangeas, and irises. He gave him the meanings of other flowers and roses too, for future reference. He also told them where they were likely to be if they were not in the garden.
"Thank you," Thorin said once Balin finished telling him everything. "I only hope that I can find them."
"So do I. I wish you good luck. I hope that Bilbo likes them if you are able to, and that Beorn allows you to pick them also."
Thorin nodded in agreement and they left the room.
Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long. The weather was cooler the following day.
He and Balin left the house after they ate breakfast and headed to the garden. Although Thorin felt rather out of place there, he still found himself interested in what Balin showed and taught him. It was also good to learn something about Hobbit customs.
Most of the flowers were there except for the alstroemerias, but that was all right. There were enough yellow roses to make up for it, as they both meant "friendship."
They then spoke to Beorn, who was initially reluctant to let them pick some of the flowers. However, it was not until Balin whispered something to him did he look understanding. He even smiled a little as he allowed Thorin to gather some. "But do not take too much, please," he added.
He nodded and promised that he wouldn't.
As he picked and arranged the flowers into a bouquet with Balin's help, he wondered when it would be a good time to give it to Bilbo. He thought it over before decided that it would be best to do so after Bilbo tended to the garden. If he was in the mood to, that is. But perhaps it would be agreeable if they had a nice talk first.
Thorin was not sure of when that would be, though. He hadn't seen him since breakfast. In fact, he hadn't spoken to him the previous day. He had chosen to let him have his space, as he thought that Bilbo would not want him to start showing his affections right away.
He was still mulling this over when the said Hobbit left the house and made his way over to the field. He appeared to be going for a stroll.
Balin saw him too, and after clapping Thorin's shoulder with a grin, he went back inside.
Thorin trailed after Bilbo, feeling somewhat nervous, but determined all the same. The latter noticed him as he drew closer and smiled. Thorin relaxed, glad that he wasn't averse to his presence. Giving him space had clearly been the right thing to do after all.
"Good morning," Bilbo greeted pleasantly. He moved closer so that he was walking next to him.
"Hello," Thorin returned with a smile of his own.
"How are you?"
"I cannot complain. I am better than I was yesterday."
"Yes, it was a steamer, wasn't it? Luckily, I don't mind it. I had to tend to my own garden in the summers for years."
Thorin chuckled. "I can imagine. Of course, working in the forges is worse, as it is much hotter."
Bilbo nodded. "I believe you there. I doubt that I could even work in one, and I'm used to the heat. What's that you have there?" he questioned next, eyeing the bouquet that he was holding. "Ohhhh, those are pretty. I didn't know that you had any interest in flowers."
"I usually don't. In fact, none of the Dwarves that I know have any use for them, and most don't know anything about them. Not generally."
"Ah, I see. So, why do you have that bouquet?"
"Well, it's certainly not because I want it, or that it's mine. I made it for you."
Bilbo looked highly astonished. "You...you made that for me?" he inquired once he found his voice.
"Aye," Thorin responded, handing it to him. He peered over his shoulder to make sure that his nephews and friends weren't around. The last thing he wanted was for them to see what he was doing. He wasn't in the mood for any form of hostility.
Bilbo took the flowers and admired them, looking quite pleased. There were yellow and dark pink roses, as well as a few anemones, asters, hydrangeas, and irises here and there.
The yellow roses told him that Thorin wished for his friendship. The anemones and asters likely indicated that he anticipated becoming more than friends, but he would be patient and wait to see if it would (and could) be so. A lovely touch, Bilbo thought. The dark pink roses and hydrangeas expressed his heartfelt gratitude...for saving his life, obviously.
And the irises...
"What compliments do you have for me, pray tell?" he inquired. He found himself really wanting to know.
Thorin smiled at him once more. "That you are the truly the most remarkable person I have ever met. You never change, and yet, you are full of surprises. I'm happy that you are who you are," he declared.
He wanted to add something else, but he felt that it was not the right time to.
Bilbo reddened, touched by his words. "Thank you, Thorin. And thank you for the flowers. They are very beautiful."
Thorin was greatly pleased. "You are more than welcome," he murmured, squeezing his hand. After that, he gave him a small kiss on the forehead before they continued their walk.
And from somewhere inside of Beorn's house, Balin was grinning happily.
(A/N: And there you have it! Sorry I took so long with this chapter. I have been very busy with work until just recently because we have more people now, and these writer's blocks have been causing me nothing but grief and irritation. I'm sorry if the first and second parts of the chapter are too short. I did try to make them long. Still, I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please review! Oh, and the part where they were in the field is based off a few pictures of them I saw online. PM me if you'd like to see it.)