A/N: OK, i've thought long and hard and have descided that there will be a few more pranks before it gets back to the story line... because i'm really getting tired of these pranks!

Sirius was fuming. The Twins were trying to help him think of something embarrassing enough to make up for what he had just endured. He had been pacing for a while not really listening to the Twins spewing out ideas.

"No, that wouldn't work." Fred sighed in frustration. "We may as well just stick a ruddy 'Kick Me' sign on his back!" Fred's voice dripped with sarcasm as he flopped down on Sirius's bed and stared at the ceiling, lost in thought.

Sirius suddenly stopped pacing. "What did you say?"

Fred glanced at him oddly. "About the 'Kick Me' sign?" Sirius nodded. "I was just joking, thats the oldest, lamest one there is!" But Sirius smiled broadly.

"Maybe a normal piece of parchment with 'Kick Me' wrote on it, but what if it said something else?" He smiled conspiratorialy as the Twins suddenly jumped to attention.

Fred and George simultaneously spoke. "Teach us, oh Great One."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Tonks sighed as she flopped down on her bed. Ginny was sitting upside down in her swively muggle chair that was called a 'Compy-utter Chair' or something to that affect. Her long hair dragged the ground and her feet were hanging over the back as she spun in circles with her fingers grazing the floor in order to keep herself going. Remus was stretched out on the floor looking positively green as he watched Ginny's upside-down spinning increase in speed.

"Ginny, can you please stop." She obliged and looked questioningly at him. "Its just that, even though you seem to have a stomach of steel to be spinning upside down like that, just watching you had made me slightly motion sick and I think much longer and I'd have had to run for the loo."

Tonks snorted. "Remus, I wouldn't have expected you to be prone to motion-sickness." He just nodded, still looking slightly green. Suddenly Tonks sat up. "I've got it!" When Ginny and Remus both stared blankly at her she elaborated. "We need to get the basic feel of Sirius and try to figure out how he thinks! We then will know what to expect, and what his weaknesses are." She turned to Remus. "You seem like a likely candidate to get information from seeing as you've known him longer than I've been alive and are currently sleeping in the same room as he is." Remus groaned. "Whats wrong?"

"God I feel old." She looked puzzled. "You just said I've know him longer than you've been alive. Which, sadly is true."

Tonks smiled but moved on. "So, Remus, What was Sirius's favorite subject in school?"

"Charms. James always hated him because that was the only class he could beat James at." Remus said with a smile.

Tonks looked surprised. "Really? I would have thought it was Potions. Mother said the reason I loved Potions was because it was a Black thing. She was alway best at Potions." She thought about it for a second. "Actually, I think the reason I liked Potions was that I could actually do it and I was the only one that the teacher couldn't get to. The harder Snape tried to scare me or intimidate me, the better I did."

Remus groaned horribly and covered his face." I don't think I've ever felt this old!"

Tonks and Ginny both looked puzzled. "Why?"

Remus sadly sighed and looked at them. "Tonks, Severus Snape is my age. No, actually, he's younger than me, My birthday is September 28 and his is in the spring I believe."

Both Tonks and Ginny had horrified looked on their faces and their mouthes hung open. Ginny was the first to recover. "Oh my God! Pro- I mean, Remus how old are you?"

Remus smiled at the use of his name instead of Professor. "Well, I was thirteen, no, fourteen when Tonks was born,"he glanced at her, "so you do the math."

Tonks counted quickly and looked shocked. "Snape's that young?"

Remus looked at her. "Oh, gee, thanks Tonks. You don't care that I'm old, just that Snape is that young."Ginny asked how old Tonks was.

"I'm twenty-three, twenty-four in December." She turned back to Remus. "So you're thirty-six? Thats not old!" She looked relieved. "I thought Snape was about forty-five and that you were about thirty-four."

Ginny looked at Remus. "Are you sure that your older than Snape? I mean, you don't look old at all, and he lookes like an old codger!" Tonks and Remus laughed.

Tonks looked around seriously. "So, we've established that the meetings between a middle-aged werewolf, and two girls less than half his age would look really bad for all of us under different circumstances. Now, lets get back to Sirius." She paused and thought. "Ok, what is Sirius's largest fear?"

Remus smiled sadly. "Well, his largest fear is one that has already came true once before." Ginny caught on immediatly and looked down sadly, but Tonks was slow on the uptake and still looked puzzled. "His worst fear is the same as my worst fear," He paused slightly, "The people I love being hurt." Tonks looked at him in horrible realization and her mouth formed a silent 'oh'. But Remus moved on. "But, his largest irrational fear is"he sniggered slightly" frogs. Sirius, my dear friends, is deathly afraid of frogs. I still don't know why, but once we were out one night and one jumped on his arm and started crawling up it and he squeeled like a little girl."

Tonks smiled. "Good. We atleast know that his prank will not include a frog." She thought long and hard on what to ask next.

"Ok, what is Sirius's favorite phrase?" Remus started sniggering and turned red. "I don't know about now, but when we were in school he had this phrase he made up himself. He liked to make a game of saying it to girls and seeing which ones slapped him and which ones... er-" he looked for the right word. "- um... accepted." He started giggling like a girl which made both Ginny and Tonks looked up startled.

Tonks waited untill he was through with his girly giggle fit. "And? What was it?"

Remus looked startled. "Well it's sort of-" he glanced at Ginny, "-inappropriate."

Ginny looked at him like he was crazy. "Um, Remus. I grew up with the Twins, not to mention brothers who are eight and ten years older than me and not much better than the Twins. I've got a feeling I've heard much worse." as an afterthought she added. "Actually, I'd be willing to bet whatever you have to say is tame compared to the things i've heard over the years."

Remus looked between them both and sighed. "Oh, but you must promise that Molly never hears I mentioned this in front of Gi... actually, in front of either of you as far as she's concerned."

Tonks cut him off ."Stop stalling!"

"Alright, alright, Sirius favorite saying was..."He paused dramatically. "I'm hott, Your hott, let's shag."

Tonks and Ginny fell over they were laughing so hard so that they ended up in a pile on the floor. Tears were streaming down Tonks's face and Ginny looked slightly purple from laughing. After a moment, Ginny caught her breath and said, "I'll have to try that one sometime!" which left both Tonks and Remus looking startled at her.

Tonks turned to Remus. "I think that anything you could think of saying would be subdued in her case. Especially after she said that!" Ginny looked at then in a mock scowl.

"I'm still here you know?" They all laughed once more. "But seriously, Remus, If that was the best he could come up with, then he's weak! Although, that was a good one for him to come up with. Did it ever work?"

Remus looked startled at her blunt question while Tonks thought it was hilarious. "Ginny!" He said. "I thought you and Ron were the sensible two of the Weasley children?"

Ginny snorted. "I'm really good at hiding it, but I'm the master of the misbehavior. And Ron? He's only seemingly sensible because Hermione has him whipped. They're both so bloody oblivious to the fact that they are obviously smitten over each other. Hermione is sensible and Ron is to stupid to do anything so he just follows her like a love-starved puppy." Tonks was grinning at Ginny but Remus looked stunned at her straight-forward description of her brother and Hermione.

Tonks wanted to see what else she had to say. "So, now that we have the love-life..or lack of.. of your closest brother, what about the Twins?" Ginny grinned and started.

"Ok, so at school there is Fred's team-mate Angelina. I'm not sure, but I believe they are currently dating, but they don't actually date. I think they are trying to keep it private because they never hold hands or anything, they act like friends when everyones around, but the way my dear brother looks at Angelina kinda tells on him. And I caught them comming out of an empty classroom last year after the Yule Ball. I thought they had just gone as friends, but I'm not so sure, seeing as they looked slightly disheveled comming out of that room." Remus still was shocked at her, but smiled now.

"What about dear George?" Tonks asked, excited to be getting the information on everyone.

Ginny smiled. "George, is almost like Ron except that George knows he's falling head over heels with his best friend, where as Ron is simply blind. And before you ask, No, George's best friend is not Lee Johnson." She answered Remus's unanswered question." Lee is his friend, but Lee and Fred are more of best friends. Alicia Spinnet's sister was Bill's best friend so Alicia was around alot when we were little and has been George's best friend forever."

Tonks looked surprised. "Regina Spinnet was her sister?" Ginny nodded. "Regina was two years above me at hogwarts. I remember her and Bill were like brother and sister. I think I remember seeing her and Alicia at the Burrow once for christmas didn't I?" Ginny nodded.

"Anyway, I think George had been steadily falling for Alicia for about a year, but she is to bloody blind to realize it! Poor guy, she could tell him to set his own foot on fire and he'd do it. You should have seen this one time before the Yule Ball. Alicia is pretty and got asked by alot of people. Well, for some odd reason, a slytherin descided to pin her against a wall in a deserted corridor and say inappropriate things to her... unfortunately for him, George was looking for her and lets just say he found her alright." Ginny laughed. "I bet that stupid Slytherin still can't walk straight."

Tonks descided to move to another person. "Lets see, what about..."she cast around for someone to ask about when it hit her. She grinned. "What about dear, old Remus here?"

Remus started to go scarlett and spluttered something about 'thats not right' but Tonks just put a Silencing Charm on Him so that all he could do was squirm, and couldn't interupt. "Well,"Ginny said. "He's hard to figure out." She spoke to Tonks as if he wasn't there. "I think he fancies someone in the Order..."Remus started miming for her to stop. "Buuuut, " She enjoyed watching him squirm. "He does share a room with Sirius. And he seems to know a whole lot about him. "She smiled at the appalled look on Remus's suddenly pale face and his mouth hanging wide open. "Maybe theres a good reason for them to share a room when this house is full of empty rooms that only need to be cleaned." Remus crossed his arms in an attempt to looked surly. "No. I don't think he fancies blokes. But..."

They never got to finish tormenting Remus because there was a knock at the door and the Twins opened the door and looked in.

"Mum says she want's us all to help her clean a little today."

All three of them rose and started to the door when Remus started waving his arms wildly. Fred looked curiously as he mimed not being able to talk. "Did they Silence you, mate?" Remus nodded fervently. George smiled.

"There you go." George waved his wand and Remus smiled. "Thanks George."

"Don't worry, mate." George slapped him on the back. "They've done it to me before."

As they started down the hall, Tonks remembered that she left her wand in her room and after mumgling "Some auror I am" set off to get it. Fred and George hurried into their rooms and told Remus that he was assigned to the Library. Remus went into the Library and found Ron there reading a book on Quiditch. Remus quickly asked if he knew that Mrs. Weasley had set them to cleaning and found that Ron hadn't heard. Remus turned to the shelf and started to organize books when Ron started to leave. Halfway to the door, Ron turned and said "What is-" he couldn't finish. Try as he might he couldn't say anything or control his feet.

"Er, Ron?" Remus asked as Ron walked towards him, but tried not to. "What are you doing?"

Ron tried to reply but couldn't. before either of them could stop him, Ron had kissed Remus on the cheek. "EW!" Ron yelled."I'm really sorry, I couldn't control my feet! As soon as I read.. Th.. si...? Why can't I say it?" Ron tried to say something again but nothing came out but a slight gurgle. He shrugged and told Remus to look in the mirror and left.

Remus was completely freaked out, having just been kissed on the cheek by a fifteen year old boy and not been told why. He looked in the mirror but saw nothing, He even looked at his back and saw nothing. He couldn't figure it out. Remus quickly put up the books he was holding and went to find Molly and see what she thought.

Remus had just closed the door and made for the stairs at the end of the hall when he heard Ginny behind him.

"Hey Remus. Why..?" Shecouldn't finish her thought. He turned and his fears were confirmed when she gave him a peck on the chin, as that was the highest place she could reach. She looked in horror at what she had just done. "I'm soo sorry! I couldn't stop, I don't know but I just read... Th...oh! i can't say it!" Remus told her not to worry and headed on towards the stairs.

Remus had made it to the second floor landing when he heard footsteps comming from the second floor corridor. Please stop walking! But his prayers went unanswered for he heard the unmistakable sound of someone stopping behing him.

"Professor, whats that on.." It was Hermione. She was apparently struggling to say something, but couldn't. He turned to her just in time to get a small peck on the jaw bone from a scarlett Hermione. "Oh My! I'm soo sorry I just-" He cut her off with a wave of his hand.

"Don't worry, Your now the third person in the last few minuted to unexplainably kiss me, so don't worry about it." He started back down the stairs to the hallway and had almost made it to the doorway to the kitchen before he heard the sounds of someone comming down the stairs.

"Oh no." he muttered as he made a dash for the kitchen. As soon as he entered he saw Sirius and Molly sitting at the table arguing. Molly started to turn to the door but Remus stopped her. "Molly! Don't look at me. NO seriously." She obliged though grudgingly.

"Remus, why ever not?" she asked.

He sighed. "Someone has done something so that everyone i've so much as met has taken one look at me and then kissed me!" Sirius snorted into his tea and Remus turned to him. "IT'S NOT FUNNY! Sirius, this is too much! I've had the great pleasure of being kissed by three children! One of which was male and I will probably be scarred for life. As will poor Ron, Ginny and Hermione!" Noone had heard the door open.

"What about Ron, Ginny and Hermione." Tonks had walked in. "Hey Remus, whats that written...oblah... i mean, nobuk... no, i can't say it!" Remus sighed and turned to her.

"Oh no." he muttered. Tonks suddenly looked very afraid of her feet , as they were moving of their own accord. She crossed the kitchen to Remus, who was looking down at his shoes.

Suddeny he got an idea. It wouldn't keep Tonks from kissing him, but it would, however, lesten the imbarrasment. He looked at Tonks. "Hey Tonks, can I talk to you out here for a second?" He ran past her and out the door. He waited for her to come out also and suddenly went into the old dining room to the side. It hadn't been cleaned and the door hadn't been replaced, so he pulled back the curtain that was temporarily covering the door, praying that no one else would have the idea to run into the dining room. As expected, Tonks came in and closed the curtain behind her.

"Um. Remus? Why can't I stop following you?" She was apparently tryin her best not to, which resulted in tiny slow steps, but steps all the same.

He sighed. "Sorry to tell you,but for some reason, everyone who's looked at me other than Sirius has been unable to stop themselves from-" he never got to finish because Tonks had crossed the room and was standing about 2 inches from him. He looked down at her. She looked utterly terrified that she couldn't stop anything she was doing, but her eyes were dancing with colors as he looked down into them.

Before she could stop herself, Tonks had grabbed Remus by the sweater and pulled him down to her. But, instead of a simple peck on the cheek like everyone else, she put her lips on top of his. Their lips brushed so lightly and quickly that it almost seemed like it hadn't happened at all. after realising she was free, she jumped back like she'd been burned. She started to open her mouth to say something, but Remus held up a hand to silence her.

"I know, Your sorry, you couldn't stop yourself, you read something - still havn't figured out what yet - and you can't say it nomatter how hard you try. Correct?" Remus smiled at the shocked expression on her face.

"Erm, yeah thats about it. But how did you know?" She looked up expectantly.

"Because, it's the same thing Ginny said, the same thing Hermione said and even the same thing Ron said."

Tonks looked startled. "You kissed Ginny, Hermione and Ron?" Remus laughed.

"Correction, they kissed me. But I will say, your the only one to kiss me on the lips. Ron kissed me on the cheek, Ginny on the chin and Hermione on the jaw. I guess whatever it is makes it where noone can kiss me in the same spot. I'm guessing that if Sirius wasn't oddly immune, he's kiss me on the forehead and if i hadn't made Molly stay turned around, she'd have probably kissed me on either the nose, or the neck." He sighed. "All in all, we need to get Sirius to fix this one before the meeting. I seriously doubt anyone wants to see Mad-Eye kiss me anywhere thats left!"

Tonks laughed as she imagined Mad-Eye kissing anyone anywhere. "Let me go and get rid of Molly and then we can get Sirius together."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Later that night at dinner, Everyone wondered where Sirius was. Everyone except Tonks and Remus who, when asked, meerly shrugged and mentioned seeing an odd lump under the rug in the old Dining Room. Everyone had found out that Sirius was the one who had stuck the enchanted sticker that said 'Kiss Me' on Remus's back (even though it was actually George who had placed it.) Molly hurridly went to check it out and came back with an irate Sirius who was covered from head to foot in dust. Sirius said nothing, but scowled at Remus. Remus glanced at him.

"You know Sirius, you shouldn't have done that. I've been taking it easy on you... So far." And everyone went back to their dinner.

A/N: i know, i know, i give you long chapters, then short chapters, then long ones again. I CANT HELP IT! whatever flows, flows. Sometimes i get good ones, some times i get shorter ones. Anyways, The next one might be the last prank of the prank war, but i'm not sure. I think i've got the prank, but i'm not sure. keep the ideas comming just in case.

chelly!