"How old is she?" Spike asked as soon as they sat down.

"She'll be four in March." Buffy replied.

"Wow." he sighed. "Is she the reason you left L.A?"

She nodded, "Part of. It was mainly her dad."

"What happened with her dad?" Spike asked.

Buffy tensed. She wasn't ready to share that information yet, "I don't really want to talk about that right now."

Spike nodded, knowing not to push. He stood, "I should probably go. It was nice talking to you."

Buffy smiled and walked him out, "If you want, you can come by and hang out with me and Ceri. It would probably be good for her to see another friendly face."

He smiled, "I'd love to. Would you like for me to pick you up for school?"

"You don't mind?" Spike shook his head. "I think I'll take you up on that offer." He was about to leave, but she grabbed his hand, "Please, don't tell anyone about Ceri. I'm not ready to explain everything."

Spike placed a kiss on the back of her hand, "I won't. See you in the morning."

"Bye." Buffy stood there and watched him drive away. The butterflies were back. This is not good. she thought to herself. Not good at all.

Over the next few weeks, Spike kept his promise and hadn't told anyone about Ceri. He'd been over almost every night since and it seemed Ceri really took a liking to him. More than once she'd fallen asleep on him. When this would happen, he'd put her to bed and then he and Buffy would watch a movie. "What movie do you want to watch?" Buffy asked Spike as he came back downstairs on one such night.

"I don't care. Not some crappy romance movie." Spike said as he sat down on the couch.

"Hmm….how about watching 'Monty Python and the Holy Grail'?" she asked. No butterflies would be fluttering tonight.

"Sure pet." He sighed happily as Buffy sat down next to him. He put his arm around her shoulders.

The movie was over and the credits were rolling. Buffy sat up. "Spike?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you really not mind spending your Friday nights here?"

Spike smiled and cupped Buffy's cheek in his hand, "Not at all pet." He decided to be brave and placed a kiss on Buffy's lips. Buffy surprised both of them by responding. He lay on the couch, pulling her down with him. His tongue darted out and traced Buffy's lips, begging for entrance. Buffy opened her mouth and started to really enjoy it, when flashbacks started. Parker's hands on her body. Her begging him to stop. Him raping her.

Buffy pushed off Spike and curled up on the floor crying. Spike, confused, sat down next to her. He put his arms around her. "Don't touch me!" she screamed pulling away. She stood and began pacing, "I can't do this."

Spike stood, "Can't do what?"

"This. This thing between us. I can't do it."

Confused and hurt, Spike put on hand on each of her arms to stop her pacing, "Buffy, I'm thrown by this, I'm confused... - But I can feel my skin humming, my hands, every inch of me. I've never been this excited about anybody before. I'm not trying to scare you, and I'm not going to force myself on you. But I'm, by God, not going to walk away because I think it might not work."

" Spike, I…I"

"You what?"

"I was raped!" she finally yelled at him.

Spike stared at her, "What?"

"Ceri's dad. He was my boyfriend. I thought he loved me, but he raped me. That's why we left L.A. To put distance between him and me."

"Buffy." he whispered. He pulled her into a hug and let her cry on him. He held her like until she fell asleep. He didn't know where her room was so he laid her on the couch and placed his duster over her small form and kissed her forehead. When he left, he made sure the door was locked.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thanks to all those who wished me a happy birthday. I hope you guys recognized what Spike said cuz it doesn't belong to me. It belongs to Joss Whedon as does everything in this story except the plot and Cerridwen. They're mine. Hopefully I can post the next chapter soon. With my fiance neglecting me right now, I think I'll be able to. Thanks for the reviews.