-1Author's note: My apologies, I know it's been a long time since I updated this story. Without further ado..
Cindy put a hand to her temple, wishing her head would stop throbbing so. She felt hung over, and she knew exactly why. Because of what she was thinking about doing today. It was unthinkable, or at least should have been. She had been raised better than this. That's the thought that kept nagging her, anyways.
It was a scary word, after all. Intimidating, even for someone with her vocabulary. Oh, not that it was a long word. It wasn't. At least, not for her. But she could not bring herself to say it out loud. She finally pushed the covers off of herself, tiptoeing across the hall to check on her son. He was out like a light, snoring. But it did not appear to be a restful sleep. He continually moved about, thrashing, almost. Cindy sighed. She could not bring him with her. He could not understand the gravity of the situation.
She got dressed quickly, before going downstairs and starting her car. She did not drive away immediately. She put her head down in the steering wheel and started to cry.
This was not her choice. This was not what she wanted to do. That one word, that scary word, emblazoned itself in her mind. Abortion. It was step one. How could she have a child she couldn't take care of? At the same time, how could she not try?
Almost as bad, that terrifying word brought on another one. Divorce. She had not been to the lawyer yet. She knew it was futile, but she had some small hope Jimmy would realize the wrong he'd done, would come find her and find some way to make it up to her.
But that was a dream. She knew it, whether awake or not. Jimmy never fixed a problem until it was almost too late. But this time, it already was.
It was too late two months ago, though not even Cindy had known it then. She had figured it would pass. That Jimmy would find some invention to speed up his work and get home sooner. Would stop working at home. At his genius level, he had often not really realized that Cindy's emotions were running rampant.
She was scared for the sake of Matt, for herself…and most, for the baby Jimmy didn't know was coming. Their baby. But is it right for the baby to pay for mine and Jimmy's mistakes? she asked herself, finally putting the car into gear.
The trip to the clinic would take her an hour, and she had to be back before Matt, or her mother, were awake.