Chapter 4

"And that, class, is how the after effects of aphrodisiac at the sudden exposure to the antidote will doom all of humanity and plunge them into a nightmare world from which there is no waking and no hope of ever living or seeing the light of day again." Ms. Bitters turned down to the small, purple-haired girl standing at her feet playing video games. "Thank you for that explanation Gaz." Then she glared at Dib. "If only your brother was more like you in the classroom. You may go back to class now."

Gaz turned and left, muttering "whatever" under her breath as she went.

Dib didn't really pay attention to what Ms. Bitters said after she looked away from him. His head was turned towards the desk next to him. It was empty and it had been for a week now. Dib was starting to wonder where EB had gone. (He'd started to call her EB as well now.) He also hadn't seen Zim for a week. At first he figured they'd both gone back to EB's dimension but since he's gone through the portal before he found that if they ever tried to cross over he'd be pulled in as well.

So the desk was empty and now he was stuck wondering.

Ms. Bitters was about to continue with her lesson when the door was pushed open rather hard. It smacked against the wall and then there was a smiling figure in the doorway wearing a bright red shirt and a pair of blue shorts. Her smile brightened the gloomy room but in a scary way.

Everyone in the class gasped and a few kids hurried over to the back corner.

Dib sat at his desk, dumbfounded.

It was… EB! Smiling! Cheery! Happy! Nice! It was so freaking scary!

EB entered the room, still smiling, and sat down at her desk next to Dib. She caught Ms. Bitters' stare and stood up again. EB bowed to the teacher. "I'm terribly sorry that I was away an entire week, Ms. Bitters. I've had some strange occurrences at the home that just had to be attended to. So I'm very sorry." Then she stepped up to the front and put an apple, bright and shiny red, on the teacher's desk. Next she SKIPPED back to her seat and practically jumped into the chair with excitement on her face. She looked ready to learn.

Most kids looked like they were ready to faint or scream.

RECESS COMES

EB was sitting on a bench next to Gaz. She was also annoying the little Goth girl more than usual. Gaz kept trying to play quietly but EB was insistent on her 'helping' and her 'hints' on how to beat the game. The problem was that every time Gaz tried out something that EB had said would be beneficial towards her she found that it was the exact opposite. And then all EBB would say was 'oops'.

Finally Gaz put her game down and glared at EB. EB sort of shrank down where she was. That was new.

"What's with you today?" Gaz asked. "It's like you've completely changed overnight."

"What ever are you talking about little Gaz? I haven't changed at all! I'm EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB! EB!"

Gaz clapped her hand over EB's mouth to shut her up. She was originally going to punch her but they'd been good friends up until now so she went against that. "Don't do that, ever." Then Gaz took her hand away. "Now, I want you to tell me what ZIM did."

"Why would you think that ZIM did something?"

"Because when something like this happens it's always his fault."

"Yeah!" cried DIB, immerging from the bushes. "Zim's up to something and you've been dragged into it! I know that's how it is!" Then he slipped on the edge of the bench and went tumbling onto the pavement, smashing his face up in the process. Dib lifted up a little and groaned. EB just laughed and Gaz smirked before going back to playing her game. But since DIB was there with a rather strange EB she got up and wandered over to the other side of the school where she knew she wouldn't be bothered.

Dib straightened himself up and then turned to EB who was smiling at him gleefully. But he saw her for what she really was. A dimension hopper! And over the past few weeks he'd suspected her of being Irken as well. But seeing as EB could still stand rain, without bathing in paste, as far as he knew, she didn't seem likely to be one. She was still smiling.

"Alright, EB. What's Zim done this time? Given you aphrodisiac so that you won't blow something up in a rage? Convinced you to seem as nice as possible to give me a false hope that you really are kind on the inside and then destroy me? Or is this just some sick joke they your mind has pulled together for amusement?"

EB giggled. Dib jumped back. "Oh Dib," she said, making a very girly motion, "you're so funny. Why on Earth would any of that be occurring at this very moment? Can't you just accept that I'm happy for once? I might be like this for a while you know. What happens then?"

"Then I know that Zim's done something because I'm aware that you can't stay that nice for very long. You'd crack at some point and eventually beat someone up."

EB giggled again.

"Stop doing that!"

She slouched down. "Well you don't have to be mean about it. After all, what did Yuffie ever do to you?"

"Who's Yuffie?"

She frowned and shook her hand in front of Dib's face. "Heeeelllllloooooooooo. That's ME. What's with you today Dib? You're very weird. Come on! Yuffie! EB! As in Euphoric Brooke!"

"I thought that EB stood for Empty Brooke."

"Well of course it does," she stood up and placed her hands on her hips in a very dramatic and over enthusiastic way. "But I was only saying that EB can stand for a bunch of different things. For example there's Empty Brooke, which could mean that she didn't have any emotions but that could also be called Emotionless Brooke so Empty Brooke could mean that she's hungry, and Euphoric Brooke which would be very happy like me, and Evil Brooke, which would be very mean and evil and likes to fight a lot and hates everything, which is my opposite, and Einstein Brooke, who would be very, very, very, very, very, very, very smart and would know everything in the world, and Excitable Brooke, which would get very excited about things very easily, and Ecstatic Brooke, which would always be excited no matter what happens but more so over excitable, and Earning Brooke, which would mean that she would earn her keep and would be a very good worker and would be very good at doing jobs, and Enticing Brooke, which would mean that she's very pretty and lots of boys would like her and stuff like that, at least that's what I think, and Enticed Brooke, which would mean that she would be attracted to all boys and that is like the opposite of the one that I just said before this one, and Ending Brooke, which would mean that she was close to her end, or death and that would be very sad am I might cry if that were to happen, and Eldest Brooke, which would mean that she was like an old grandma or something and she'd be wise and she'd be able to tell a lot of fun stories that everyone would like to hear except for rotten grandkids but that just means that they won't be getting any cookies at the end of story time, and Emerald Brooke, which could mean that she was like an irken or something…"

Dib shook his hands in front of his face. "OK, OK, I think I get the point."

EB smiled.

"Wait a second…" He rubbed his chin. "Are you saying that there's more EB than one? That's there are a bunch of different EBs that have sprung up out of nowhere in the past few days?

"Huh?" EB's face suddenly went pale. "OMG! I didn't say that! I said nothing! I didn't say anything concerning me not being the EB that you know and that there are other EBs besides me who are tearing Zim's house up right that this moment. You heard nothing, nada, zip, zilch, nothing escaped my lips and you hear nothing as a result of that! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!" Then Eb stood up and climbed over the back of the bench that she has been sitting on, still not taking her eyes off of Dib as she went. "I said nothing and you heard nothing about the other EBs and how there is more than one of us and how the original EB and Zim think that more will sprout up sooner or later and stuff like that!" Then she slipped and fell onto the cement behind the bench. EB got up quickly and shook her head and then put her hand behind her head and laughed. She stepped back a little bit, slowly moving towards the school gate. "Nothing came from me and nothing was to be heard and that is why you heard nothing which came from me because I had absolutely nothing to say about any other EBs or anything else that might happen while you stay here at school concerning dimensions and clones and aliens and bases and robots and Girs and happy things that I really like! So you just go back into class and enjoy a day of learning and have fun and then go home and do homework and spend time with your sister and then go to bed and then wake up tomorrow and I'll either be really depressed or very angry or very normal or maybe something completely different that I don't really know about nor do I really care at this moment because this is a very awkward moment, don't you think so? And when it comes down to the awkward moment in life its best to just keep talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking and talking so that the person that you are talking to doesn't realize that you're slowly walking away from them as you talk and then when something happens that is very different from the conversation or talking fit that you were having with them they look away and you're able to slip away unnoticed and then they get very confused but they go about with their business of the day nonetheless. So when I am gone the bell will have rung and then you'll look around and I'll be no where and you'll be thinking about everything that I said just now, trying to make out anything about the clones that I was talking about. Which I was NOT talking about! There are no clones! There is only one EB! That EB is I and I only because I am that one EB and that one EB is I and no one else can be that EB because there is only one and that one space has been filled by the girl that stands before you. And if you ever think that there are other EBs then shame on you and shame on your existence! But it also means that you are a very good paranormal investigator and you should be very proud of yourself for figuring out about the EB clones and what was happening at Zim's house and how no one has any idea as to how it happened or rather how they're going to fix it. But it's not like there actually IS anything that needs to be fixed because everything is fine and ok at Zim's house and there's only one EB and that EB is me because I'm standing right in front of you and I'm talking and I'm talking like EB. But I'm also stalling which is odd because only people with things to hide stall and of course I, EB have nothing to hide from you, Dib, because I am EB and I have nothing to worry about because there is nothing wrong at the base or in the world. Everything is perfect! Lollipops and raindrops and gummy bears and everything happy is filling the world with happy love and that's why I know that nothing is wrong at Zim's base and that everything is perfect and in perfect order! And there are no clones! And I'm not walking away from you! And--"

The bell rang.

Dib turned and looked at the school in surprise.

Then he turned back.

EB, or whoever she was, was gone.

Dib had the sneaking suspicion that he'd missed something very important in that long rant. But he didn't have time to think about it because soon Ms. Bitters was pulling him inside so that he'd be able to listen to another boring lecture.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kim: Took me forever to write that whole thing out!!! It's a whole page on Microsoft Word! I've been on the computer for a while now and I've got cramps and I hurt all over my fingers!!! But I give to you the next chapter of Empty Brooke and Invader Zim 3- Triangle! Because I know that you all like it!

Brooke: I don't…

Kim: You don't like anything!