yumyumbagel: I'm eating grilled cheese, baby!
animefan127: -sleeping-
yumyumbagel: Fine! Be that way! Don't talk!!
animefan127: -snores-
yumyumbagel: THAT'S THE SPIRIT!!!
----chapter----------------------------8-----------------------------(grilled cheese!)-----------------
yumyumbagel: I be dat ho workin' dem streets, fo' my baby daddy
----------------Sound of a record being scratched----------------------
Blackribbon5: If you would allow me to pause your reading for a moment.
yumyumbagel: -off stage- NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND YOU! SPEAK ENGLISH IN THE UNITED STATES!
Blackribbon5: But, they can understand me just fine. I do not appriciate your brash use of language and I am positive that they do not either. I would like to take this time to apologize to the audience formally for the strange words we use in the past, present and future chapters of this fanfic. Thank you...And I would also like to anounce that this chapter will also be entitled "the return of Blackribbon5" Thank you and good night.
--------------------------sound of record starting back up again---------------------
Kayako: Uhhhhhhhhhh... -about to eat animefan127's jaw-
Blackribbon5: -walks in with Riza's body; covered in her blood-
Ed: -freezes- Wait a minute!! I remember you!!! -runs away from Blackribbon5-
Blackribbon5: -tosses Riza'a body at Kayako- Here girl!!! IT'S RAW!!!!
Kayako: -looks up and catches Riza's dead corpse in her jaws; chomping on it with blood spurting onto the rug-
animefan127: -wakes up- Hey!! THAT'S A NEW RUG, BITCH!!!
Kayako: -starts crawling back up the stairs with Riza's corpse-
Blackribbon5: JUSTICE IS DONE!!! -does peace sign-
Ed & Envy: WTF...?
Blackribbon5: Holy crap!! -looks around- Surround sound!!
animefan127: Yeah, I bought it in my spare time. -grins- Miaaaaaaaaaaaammmmiiiiiii... fun.
Blackribbon5: Wow... -looks at Ed- who's the midget?
... O.o;;(Oh shit...)
animefan127: Ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod--
Ed: -yelling- I'M NOT A DAMNED MIDGET!!! I'M NOT TINY, SMALL OR MICROSCOPIC!!!
Blackribbon5: -pats Ed on the head- I'm not calling you tiny, small or microscopic... I'm saying you're small enough that a paperclip could crush you.
...O.o;;(Okay... does Blackribbon5 have a deathwish?!)
Ed: -becomes reaaaaaaaally twitchy-
Blackribbon5: I mean seriously... how do you and animefan127 do... "it"?
animefan127: -sweatdrops- Does it MATTER?!?!
Blackribbon5: Well I know how Roy and I do "it", but you have... "The Midget". I mean, someone who a paperclip could crush, someone who gets lost in a bathroom rug... I mean...
Ed: -gives a battle cry and lunges at Blackribbon5 and knocks her to the ground-
Blackribbon5: I'm sorry, chibi, I have someone already... and he's way taller than you.
Ed: I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!! I SWEAR--
animefan127: -throws Ed onto couch effortlessly(cause he doesn't weigh alot)- Okay... calm down.
Ed: B-But she--
animefan127: I know. Remember, I'm the exact same height as you. -turns to Blackribbon5-
3...
2...
1...
animefan127: YOU FRIGGIN' BITCH!!! I'M AS TALL AS ED, WHICH MEANS YOU'RE MAKING FUN OF ME TOO!!! -lunges at Blackribbon5 who just stood up and starts punching her-
Blackribbon5: -throws animefan127 on couch; on Ed(cause Blackribbon5 is a vampire and strong)-
Ed: Gack!!!
Blackribbon5: First!! I was insulting him!!! -points at Ed- Not you becuase YOU are the right height for a FEMALE!!! While ... uh... Ed, is ALSO the correct height for a female!! That, and his hair style of choice works too.
Ed: -screaming- I'M NOT A FUCKING GIRL!!!
Envy: Or so you say...
animefan127: -jumps off of Ed and glares at Blackribbon5- He's not a GIRL!!! How DARE you insult the protagonist of a widely watched anime!!!
Ed: Anime?
animefan127: -looks to Ed- Forget I said that. -looks back at Blackribbon5- So you're BASICALLY insulting Hiromu Arakawa!!!
-everybody gasps-
Blackribbon5: I'm not insulting her... I'm insulting her mother.
-everybody gasps again-
Blackribbon5: SARCASM!!!
Everybody: Oh... okay.
yumyumbagel: -dies randomly-
Envy: -starts clapping-
animefan127: That's mean!!!
Envy: Oh... whoops. I thought it was an act. NOOOOOOOO--
Ed: So... does that mean the world is safe now?
animefan127: No, Ed. It was just tossed into total chaos.
-things start randomly exploding-
animefan127: -panicing- WE NEED PHEONIX DOWN!!! AND FAST!!! -running around in circles-
Blackribbon5: -randomly explodes-
Everybody(except yumyumbagel): O.o;;
Envy: Can I clap now?
Ed: YES!!! SHE CALLED ME A FRIGGIN' GIRL!!!
Envy: -claps enthusiastically-
animefan127: -runs to Spira and sees Tidus(see Final Fantasy X)-
Tidus: Who the hell are you?
animefan127: -kills Tidus, steals Pheonix Down, and runs all the way back to Earth-
Envy: -still mourning- OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--
yumyumbagel: -still dead-
animefan127: -bangs through door- I GOT IT!!!
Yuna: YOU KILLED TIDUS!!! -explodes-
-everybody stares and Envy, miraculously, stops mourning-
Ed: The world is going in chaos... what if she really dies?
-everybody pictures random stuff-
animefan127: -picturing flying mutant tacos, with lasers, destroying the volcanic covered world-
Envy: -pictures sitting in the bathtub and then a giant rubber ducky bites his head off-
Ed: -looks at the sentence above- This looks like a three year old's mind.
Envy: Oh yeah?! And what did you picture?!
Ed: -pictured the sun exploding and everything turning into a burning mass of chaos-
animefan127: -points to sentence above- That's what he pictured.
Envy: Oh... just bring her back to life.
animefan127: Okay!!
Gluttony: -comes in door and eats Pheonix Down-
animefan127: -temple pops out-
3...
2...
1...
animefan127: YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!! THE WORLD'S GONNA END BECAUSE OF YOU!!! ASSHOLE!!! -grabs frying pan and starts chasing Gluttony around with it-
Ed: WAIT!!! It's... It's... !!!
Envy: -gasps-
yumyumbagel: -dead-
Kayako: -coming back downstairs-
animefan127: -turns-
Gluttony: THE KING!!!
-everybody sees the king outside, holding pheonix down, giving a thumbs up-
animefan127: GIVE ME THE DAMNED FEATHER!!!! -crashes through window and runs after the King-
The King: -runs away-
----random----------author's--------------------break--------------(duuuuuur...)-----------------
animefan127: Woohoo!! We have no LIVES!!!
yumyumbagel: ;;
animefan127? What? Do you actually want a life? SAY IT ISN'T SOOO!!! -cries-
yumyumbagel: It is...
animefan127: -still crying-
yumyumbagel: -smelling coral(see the ocean)-
animefan127: W-what are you doing... ?
yumyumbagel: -hacks- It doesn't smell good.
animefan127: Did you try eating it yet?
yumyumbagel: -gasps- No...
------------cliffhanger(or do you spell it cliffhangar?)-------------------------------
Hughes: Ahh!! What a beautiful day! -dumpster explodes- It's soooo great to be alive!! -looks in the street to see the BK mascot being chased by a hoarde of people with torches and pitchforks- Now that's something you don't see everyday...
--------at-----------the-----------------------chase-------------------------
animefan127: -tackles the king to the ground- I GOT HIM!!!!
Ed: -grabs Pheonix Down-
Envy: -grinning-
animefan127 & Ed: O.o?!
Envy: DOGPILE!!!!
Ed & animefan127: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Envy: -about to jump when residential houses explode-
animefan127: Envy!! We don't have time for this!! -snatches Pheonix Down from Ed-
Ed: ...
Envy: Wait for it... wait for it... okay, now.
Ed: IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!! -runs after animefan127-
Envy: -grins and starts reading "Random Lives of Today" vol. 8- What a beautiful day... -people are running around, screaming, exploding, and spontaneously combusting(with other objects such as houses, cars, garbage cans, etc), while Envy sits on a lawn chair reading the book-
-----------at----------------------------house-------------------------------
animefan127: -about to collapse from trying to be better than Speedy Gonzalez- I'm... here... now!!! -falls on the floor and crawls over to yumyumbagel's corpse-
Ed: -walks in casually- Wow. Did you see what's happening out there? All because yumyumbagel died.
animefan127: -uses pheonix down- I'm starting to wonder if I'll benefit from this...
yumyumbagel: I'm back!!!
-all chaos ceases: birds are singing, fires immediately stop, and everything broken returns to normal(even people, except for the ones who exploded)-
Ed and animefan127: O.o Who the hell is your dad?!?!
yumyumbagel: The Grim Reaper. -grins- :D He looooooooves me as a daughter.
Ed: -stifles a laugh-
animefan127: .;; Uh-huh...
yumyumbagel? You don't believe me? Envy got scared shitless looking at him!!
Envy: -walks in- Hey!!!
yumyumbagel: -shrugs- It's true.
Envy: I thought it was a secret... -sniffs-
Grim Reaper: What 'chu talkin' 'bout?
Envy: O.O N-n-nothing!!!
Ed: O.O
animefan127: Is it Halloween already? -checks calender- Huh... guess not...
yumyumbagel: DADDY!!! -glomps grim reaper-
Grim Reaper: Where's yo mamma?
yumyumbagel: Lust or Kayako?
Grim Reaper: Kayako.
yumyumbagel: Feeding.
Grim Reaper: ... what 'bout Lust?
yumyumbagel: Dead.
Grim Reaper: ... who killed 'er?
yumyumbagel: Me.
Grim Reaper: ... damn...
animefan127: Oh!! Tell him about the time you rolled in crap!!!
yumyumbagel: I blew up the fridge, a-and t-then I rolled on the stuff in it...
Ed: O.O
Envy: O.O
animefan127: Remember the rubber ducky?
yumyumbagel: It almost killed me!!! -cries- And Envy didn't do anything to protect me!!!
Ed: -cowers behind animefan127-
Envy: -disinegrates-
yumyumbagel: O.o But I loves him...
Grim Reaper: -groans in annoyance and Envy returns to the way he was before-
yumyumbagel: Just smack him around a bit.
Grim Reaper: -walks over to Envy and starts smacking him with a glove-
animefan127: -grins-
Ed: -still cowering-
animefan127: H-hey!! I have a request!!!
Grim Reaper: What?
animefan127: Uh... um... er... hmm... can't think of it. Ask me again in five minutes. :D
yumyumbagel: -rolls around on the floor-
Grim Reaper: What the hell is wrong with you, child?
yumyumbagel: I dunno. Genetics... ?
Ed: -regained composure- Bring back Al!!
Grim Reaper: Sorry, but I can't do that.
Ed?!
Grim Reaper: Once a soul goes past the gate, I can't do shit. Sorry, but it's the big eye ball's property and he doesn't like me... we fight a lot.
Ed: -pissed- Great!! And to think I had connections with Death itself...
yumyumbagel: Yup!! Me!!!
Grim Reaper: But... I can bring back the jelly doughnuts you ate.
Ed: How?!
Grim Reaper: Dunno. The giant eye didn't like 'em... no mouth.
Ed: Oh...
Grim Reaper: I was gonna give 'em to yumyumbagel as a birthday present, but with her being a dip-shit, retard, and among other things, this is the Philosopher's Stone. Imagine what she would do with them.
Everybody: -thinks of the world exploding-
yumyumbagel: I can't wait to blow up the world:D
Envy: That's a bad thing.
Ed: Aye yie yie...
animefan127: -falls asleep and falls on the floor-
Ed?!
Grim Reaper: Huh...
yumyumbagel: -gasps-
Envy: Is she... dead... ?
yumyumbagel: Someone in here is a... MUDERER!!!
Grim Reaper: Obviously. I'm Death itself.
yumyumbagel: ... Never thought about it that way... -points at the Grim Reaper- You're a MURDERER!!!
Ed: Duh.
Envy: -rolls his eyes-
animefan127: -still knocked out-
Ed: Wait!!! I know who the murderer is!!!
Envy: Who?
Ed: HIM!!! -points out the window at the King-
Grim Reaper: -looks at the King and he dies of a heart attack-
yumyumbagel: Now do you believe me when I said that he scared Envy shitless?
Ed: -nodds-
TO BE CONTINUED...