Chapter 19

Meredith was exausted. Not for all the work she's done, which is none, but of all the thinking she's done. The same question keeps haunting her, Was it the right thing to do? Putting Izzie in that position. Sure it was Cristina's idea in the first place but she agreed. Which is just as bad. What if he hurts Izzie? What if Izzie falls for Scott? That wasn't something unimaginable but it could happen. She did fall for a patient.

"Hey Mer," Alex came walking up next to her in the locker room,"I heard you've got a husband."

She rolled her eyes,"Who hasn't?"

He snickered,"So it true."

"Yes its freakin' true!" she glared at him. Meredith had no time to deal with Alex being Alex.

"Jeez. No need to get all crazy on me," he held his hands up.

"Whatever," she muttered,"How's OB/GYN going without Addision?"

"Totally sucks. Its not even a chick, its a dude. How perverted is that?"

"Alex, I don't know if you noticed but you're a dude," she pointed out.

"So? This guy checks out his patients. Its hella nasty seeing this guy check out pregnat ladies," she shivered at the thought.

"Then report him."

"Oh yeah. Picture this, me versus an attending accusing him of checking out pregnat women. Who do you think they'll believe, frat boy or balding pervert?" he spat.

"Fine, be like that," she gave him a teasing look,"Frat boy."

Meredith snickered to herself and left the hospital. Her shift was over. Time to go home and order pizza. If Derek didn't get out late he'd cook something like roasted chicken or lasagna. She wouldn't have to order pizza. But its Meredith's appetite against someone's life. The life would win. Not that he didn't care about her, she knew he did its just that he couldn't help her with every little thing.

She flopped on her green couch waiting for the pizza to arrive. She flipped on the tube to find what's on, the only thing was Sex In The City so she settled on that. The doorbell rang, assuming that it was the pizza guy Meredith opened the door without looking.

"How much?" she mumbled looking through her bag for her wallet. Finding it she took out a twenty bill. She looked up,"You're not the pizza guy."

"No, I'm not," Scott was leaning on the wooden door frame waiting to be welcomed in,"Can I...?"

She crossed her arms,"No, you can't."

"Why not?" he raised his eyebrow.

She glared at him,"Because I'm hungry, this is the third night I'm eating pizza in a row, my boyfriend is working OT, and the pizza guy's late."

"Hmmm... Sounds like you're having a rough day," he gave her a small smile.

Meredith nodded,"Yes, yes I am. And I'd like you to leave."

He nodded,"Okay," he started to walk slowly out,"I'll be back," he said over his shoulder.

She rested her head on the doorway. Damn men. She hated the way men just come in your lives make you love them to death then hurt you so bad. So you leave. You forget them, not forget but try as hell to. Then you get over them and they come back. Damn men.

"Excuse me? Miss? That'll be twenty-three fourty two," the pizza guy said nervously.

"If you had a girlfriend and you broke her and then she left. Would you wait a year to come after her?" Meredith asked looking directly at the teenager.

He bagan to sweat,"Umm... I guess so. Mamam? Really the pizza?"

"Why?" she bit her lip nervously.

"I don't know," he shrugged,"To give her time I guess."

"Time for what? Why not come right after me?!" she whined. What was she doing confiding to a complete stranger? A teenager at that.

"I guess to blow off some steam," he fiddled with the pizza,"Really, I have five other pizza's-"

"But a year?" she felt some tears starting to form.

"Well, I guess so you could date other men and figure out you'll never find anyone like him," he shrugged.

A stranger with a point,"Okay," she gave him fourty dollars and set the pizza boxes on the cofee table.

Meredith started to nibble on a piece of pizza automatically. She began to break down the teenager's words. He was right. The same thing happened with Derek. She went out with Finn and found out no matter what she loved Der no matter what. But it was slightly different with Scott. She loved him, sure. But it wasn't the same. And when she was with him it felt... Wrong. Like something was missing.

It didn't feel like that with Derek at all. She felt complete and safe. Derek... He was probably still in surgery saving someone's life.

The doorbell rang once again. It was probably Izzie. She always forgets her key. Meredith was prepared for Izzie but not a frantic Izzie. Her hair was a mess and her eyes wide.

"Meredith," she seemed to stumble out.

"What?" she chewed on the pizza.

"Sc-Scott..." her eyes became even wider.

She sighed,"What about him."

"He-he-he sorta kinda came on to me. In a closet. He's actually a good kisser... NOT the point! What's with him acting like he's not interested but he wants to make out in a closet!? I thought it was a rapist or something and sedated him!" Izzie paced around the living room carpet.

"What? You sedated my husband?!" Meredith tried not to laugh.

"Seriously! And he doesn't know! What do I do? What do I do?!" Izzie grabbed her hair fusterated.

"That bastard, I knew he'd come on to you..." Meredith's tone completely changed,"Well, just pretend everything's fine I guess. Try to turn him on and make me catch him cheating. Then he'll want a divorce. When he finds you're not interested it'll be too late."

"Are you sure its safe?" Iz was worried of the possibilities.

"Yes I'm sure," she whispered to herself,"I hope..."

"What?"

"Nothing," Mer stuffed her face with pizza.

"Hey Mer," Derek lied in bed next to her,"Sorry I'm late."

"Its fine, I'm a surgeon. I know..." she muttered sadly to him.

"So..." he said.

"So."

"Night."

"Night," Meredith settled curled up in Derek. She inhaled his scent, finally relaxing. With that she drifted off to sleep trying not to worry about the day ahead.