5. Nick and the Volcano

Sara was late.

Nick stood by his locker door, opened it, closed it, opened it again, closed it, sat down, and waited. He checked his watch again, ignoring Greg's banter about some big case he had to get started on. "ASAP," he'd said.

Grissom was at work, had been for over an hour. He'd said nothing to anyone, and Nick wondered what had happened between him and Sara last night. He kicked himself for leaving them alone together, but was upset at the fact that Grissom had showed up so late; maybe he was more upset at the fact that Sara had done nothing to make him leave. There had been alcohol involved, and perhaps that had impaired her judgment, but they had been about to make love. Sara should have politely told him that it wasn't a good time and just closed the damn door. Locked it. Propped a chair in front of it. Came back to bed, back to his warm kisses.

He sighed again and crossed his arms, couldn't get the thoughts of them together out of his mind. It was common knowledge around the office that Sara had had a thing for Grissom since she'd showed up, eight years ago. Probably before then, truth be told. Sara had told him that she'd met Grissom during college, at a lecture he'd given. She'd been smitten ever since, and whenever she spoke about him in a matter not related to work, her tone was cold and crass, the tone of a scorned lover. Grissom had denied her advances for years, so why did he choose now to unload the burden of his heavy heart, after he'd known full and well that Sara wasn't available? Shouldn't be available, he told himself, trying his best not to doubt it.

He stood up and began walking out of the locker room, tired and angry, and Sara turned the corner. They bumped into one another, and instead of arms coming out to catch, in a loving reflex, Nick's arms crossed, settled against his chest.

Sara went to her locker and opened it, Nick turned to face her and waited for her to speak.

"What?" she asked finally, and Nick grimaced.

"What happened last night after I left?"

Sara checked her gun, put it in its holster and closed the door. She faced him, looking tired, and he could tell that she'd overslept, was more than likely hung over.

"We talked."

"Talked about what?"

Sara's brows furrowed, her fingers massaging there. "Nick, can we talk about this later? I'm late."

"I know you're late, that's why I've been here waiting for over twenty minutes."

"I slept late, okay? Can we go now?"

"Sara, I want to talk about this."

"I know you do. But can we please talk about it later?" She took a step forward but Nick stopped her.

"No. Now."

Sara sighed.

"What did you talk about?"

"He told me that he thought our relationship was unprofessional, and that he didn't agree with it."

"And you said?"

"I told him the truth, that we don't do anything at work."

"What'd he say?"

"He said that it wasn't about the job," Sara said with a sigh, and Nick looked at her, feared the worst.

"So what's it about?" he asked, as if he didn't already know. His hands curled into balls, his arms still crossed, knuckles white at the bone.

"Nick," Sara said, her tone pleading to not ask again, but he did anyway.

"If it's not about work, then what is it about? Why does he have such a problem with us being together?"

"Because he's in love with me," Sara said finally, and Nick stood frozen, his head shaking up and down, his ears soaking in the words.

"He loves you?"

Nick thought a moment, swallowed the knot in his throat. He'd wanted to hear her say it, needed an excuse to justify the blood rushing to his head, the air filling his lungs, the pounding in his chest. The anger. He wanted to hear the words, wanted to storm into Grissom's office in a fit of rage, hurt him for hurting her, for making her doubt their relationship, for making her doubt him. But he couldn't. He couldn't move from where he stood, and once she'd said it the anger flushed out of him and turned cold, fell into the pit of his stomach and made it toss and turn, made him dizzy and hurt.

Sara stared at him, and he blinked ferociously to hide the tears. He took a deep breath and looked at her, whispered the words through quivering lips, "He loves you? Sara, I love you."

Nick turned and left the locker room, and the building. Sara stepped out into the hallway, the receptionist looking toward the door, then to her.

"Is he coming back?" She paused. "Grissom just called and said that you guys need to get your butts in there, like five minutes ago."

Sara looked at the woman and put her head down, turned and walked the other direction, toward the break room.