A Naruto Christmas
Disclaimer: I don't own naruto…
Naruto: wasn't I dead, emo cockatoo killed me right?
Me: this takes place BEFORE you die!
Naruto: ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I get it now!
Me: idiot
Naruto (sitting at his desk as a 6-year-old writing a Christmas letter to Santa) Dear Santa, for Christmas I want to get my hands on the Hokage's famous beer collection… I want to be drunk so I can feel like a little emo birdie, oh darn it, Sasuke already has that position filled, well I also heard that if you drink one of the Hokages legendary beers, the green jumpsuit of teletubies will be bestowed upon me and I will acquire the legendary Barney powers! Gai-sensei told me that! So all I want for Christmas is beer. Love, Naruto uzumakaei.
Santa: THIS KID IS AN IDIOT! HE EVEN SPELLED HIS OWN NAME WRONG!!!
Mrs. Claus: Honey, the fried el- I mean the fried chicken is ready!
Santa: (to himself) YUM! FRIED ELF!!! (Talking) coming dear!
(Back in Konoha on Christmas Eve…)
Santa: I wonder why Sakura wanted toilet paper… anyway who's next…oh Naruto Uzumaki… IT'S THAT IDIOT WHO LISTENED TO GAI! I have the perfect present for him…
(the next day everyone's opening their gifts)
Sakura: YAY! TOILET PAPER! Now I can stuff my bra and make Sasuke like me instead of Naruto…
Ino: COAL! JUST BECAUSE I MURDERED AYAME!!! THAT GIRL DISERVES IT AFTER PUTTING GUM IN MY HAIR!!!!
Shikamaru: hear they are… my crazy pills… (Huh, I guess that's why Shikamaru is so calm…)
Kiba: YAY! MY HUMAN BONE!!!
Neji: (to himself) YES MY MACHINE GUN! Time to kill the main branch…
(And many others had presents that I will not mention…)
Naruto: WHAT IS THIS!!! IT SAYS IT'S CALLED RAYMAN!!! Huh, wait there's a letter from Santa in here… (Reading the letter) Dear Naruto, first of all, the present I gave you is called RAMEN NOT RAYMAN! Second, I gave you this because one day, in all the ramen you eat, you will find the key that opens the Hokage's famous beer collection… GOOD LUCK! Love, Santa
Naruto…OK! I WILL EAT RAMEN UNTILL I FIND THE KEY!
Santa: (watching this from his crystal ice ball) he, he, he! Sucker!
Me: and that's why Naruto loves Ramen…