Disclaimer: Ok now, I made an offer with my ever so needed laundry money, but they wouldn't take it, so they still belong to me.

Author Notes: Oh wow, thanks for all the reviews! I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this story! Ok rest assured my lovely reviewers, no this won't be a cutting story. If Drake gets cut, it's cause he wasn't paying attention while shaving. Second, no this won't be a Drake/Mindy romance, I don't really write romance, I just like Mindy and thought I'd throw her in here lol. Ok this chapter is definatly more, rambling and I certainly took lots of liberties. Much thanks to tomisaqt for beta reading it!

Alive Beneath the Snow

As the surge of students hurried to leave for the day, Mindy caught

Josh's eye, who was leaning against Drake's locker. She shook her head

sadly, and his shoulders slumped.

He offered her a "Thanks anyway" smile, and turned his attention back

to his brother. Mindy sighed; she had hoped she would have been able to

tell Josh something.

He was so worried about Drake. And now, after sitting with him for less

than half an hour, so was she. Mindy let out another long sigh before

turning to join the students in an attempt to leave.

"So brotha from anotha motha," Josh began in an attempt to get a smile

out of Drake. That usually got at least a smirk out of his brother, but

now Drake, just turned his head slightly to acknowledge he'd heard.

"Wanna catch a movie?" Josh weakly finished.

"Maybe," Drake replied.

"Ok. How are your hands?" Josh asked softly. He wanted Drake to talk

to him. The only time he had let Josh help him in the last week, was

when his hands had blistered over and popped. He couldn't very well wrap

them himself, and when Josh offered to help, Drake had accepted.

"They're doing better," Drake replied, this time looking straight at

Josh. "Whatever you put on the band aids seem to help."

"Oh good!" Josh said cheering some. "Yeah that stuff I put on burns I

get from cooking."

"Whatever it was, it worked." Drake said shrugging and shoving the last

of his books into his bag. Josh noted there were an awful lot of books

in the bag, but decided to ask Drake about it later.

"Ready?" Josh asked, jingling the keys. He actually hoped that Drake

would take the keys from him. He didn't however. He simply nodded and

followed behind Josh to the car. Drake's confidence had completely

deflated, and Josh was unsure of how to reinflate it.

"If you want to go to the movies, we can," Drake said breaking the

silence.

"We could go see a really bad one." Josh said quietly, glancing at

Drake who was looking out the window.

"Yeah, cause we missed the last couple." There was no accusation in

Drake's voice. No blame, just a simple statement. That still didn't take

away the sting of the words.

"Talk to me Drake," Josh pleaded.

"About what?" came the quite reply. Josh gripped the steering wheel

tightly.

"Anything!" He exclaimed. "We use to be able to talk! Talk to me

please, tell me something I don't know, and show me you're still alive!

Tell me what's wrong!" There was silence for a long time, before Drake

started talking.

"I'm allergic to bees." Drake said, before quickly continuing. "I have

a medic alert bracelet in my backpack; it doesn't fit my wrist so I

don't wear it. My Epipen, if I ever get stung, is in the first pouch of my

backpack, Scottie and other band members know.

"When I was four I almost drowned in a pool because no one was watching

me. When I was seven a bully at school pushed me into the road. I never

make new years resolutions, I hate Halloween, I cried during the

elephant documentary." Drake's words were coming faster and a slight note of

hysteria was beginning to creep into them.

"Drake..." Josh attempted to break in.

"I like it when Walter calls me son, I miss when Megan was little and

she loved me, I don't like to be by myself." Drake continued, and Josh

doubted he even heard him. "I'm glad we're bothers, even if I know it's

not good for you. I like watching bad movies with you. I never disliked

Mindy really." Drake heading right on into hysteria, Josh noted with a

flinch.

"I hate my dad for leaving my mom. My favorite movie is Casablanca. I

believe in self-fulfilling prophecy. I think I want to go to college. I

have to sleep with a light on in a new place, I want to get married and

have kids one day, and I tried to overdose on Advil when I was ten."

"Drake," Josh reached out and grasped his brother's wrist. "Why would

you do that?"

"I'm sorry."

"Drake, It's ok. relax..." Josh regretted this now. "You did well. You

told me what I didn't know."

"I'm alive." Drake muttered. "Even under all this snow, I'm still

alive."

"What does that mean Drake?" Josh asked in concern. His brother didn't

reply. Josh started the car and drove home in silence.

Even under all this snow, I'm still alive Josh pondered that the whole

way.