I do not own the TMNT

*Edited* Kit really wasn't necessary.


Leonardo sat on the couch beside Master Splinter. Leo was sitting up straight staring straight ahead of him. He would have seemed completely attentive to the television if his breathing didn't give away the fact that he had slipped into a meditative trance some time ago.

Raph perched on the arm of the chair leaning back slightly and a sour look on his face. Donnie had taken one of the easy chairs while Mikey sat on the floor in front of the couch. Mikey's eyes had glazed over some time ago watching the lights dancing on the coffee table. It was clear that Donatello was thinking about one of his latest projects, probably going over a blueprint in his mind. Raphael looked even sourer than he had two hours ago when their sentence had been placed.

Two hours ago…life had been so beautiful two hours ago. Yelling, fighting, running around the lair and generally acting like the rambunctious teenagers that they truly were. But then the shadow of death had cast its aura over them all and suddenly they found that judgment had been cast, Master Splinter had demanded that they sit and watch his soaps with him.

Now they sat, transferred from active teenagers to zombie-like entities that just sat and stared, their only solace in the confines of their minds.

Leo had dropped first, slipping into his trance shortly after Melinda told her lover that she had cancer. Donnie was next, plans for his next upgrade on the battle shell taking a more prominent place in his consciousness than Miriam Trisk's horrible emotional trauma caused by a childhood disaster. Mikey fell back on his training from listening to long lectures from his father and brother and zoned completely out. Michelangelo was so out of it that he didn't even realize that he couldn't feel anything below the waist. Donatello had twice slipped off to sleep as the milder symptoms of caffeine withdrawal set in.

Raphael was the only one of them that had no pre-programmed ability to tune life out. His psych was suffering for it now. Dealing with more accounts of emotional trauma, cancer, relationships and affairs woven more intricately than the most detailed of tapestries and absurd characters all chipped away at his mental defenses until it was inevitable that they would shatter.

Before his sanity completely gave way there was but one physical sign. His hands twitched slightly towards his sais as though his mind wanted some way to battle the enemy on a field he could handle. But it was no good. In the blink of an eye the Raphael that his friends and family knew and loved was completely lost.

"NO Nancy! You can do better than that! Marry Grant, he's the guy you want!"

Mikey blinked and rubbed his eyes, and Donnie sat up.

"Slap his face! He's a two timin' bum and not worth yer time! NO!" Raph's desperate cry pulled Leo out of his trance.

"Raph, are you okay?" Donnie asked quietly, one eye on his sensei. Master Splinter didn't appear to have noticed anything.

"Tabitha!" Raph exclaimed, "Turn around! He loves you!"

"Raph! Snap out of it!" Leo waved a hand in front of his brother's face. Raph just pushed the hand out of his way.

Master Splinter acted as though he wasn't aware of what was going on outside of the screen.

"No! Now how will Rachel ever get back together with Richard?!" Raphael was actually beginning to tear up.

"Raph! Raph! Wake up!" Leo nudged his red banded brother. Mikey stood up.

A single tear managed to find its way past Raphael's mask and he sniffed slightly. Don jumped up, "I'll get some water! We might need to splash some on his face!" He ran for the kitchen.

Raph accepted a tissue from the box Master Splinter calmly held out to him.

Mikey looked like he was about to start crying himself, "Raph! Raph come back to us!" He started to shake his brother by the shoulders, "Raphie!"


Behold! The dangers of daytime drama!