Finally! I got this out. n.n Rejoice! I hope I get lots of reviews. I'll need a few before I update this again.

I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh or Levi's. Or Hadoken. n.n Or Taylor, who is actually one of my friends, or her Togepi, whose name is actually Heavy Metal. n.n Or Snapple, Resident Evil 2, Superman, Smallville, or Animal Crossing.

…I'm in trouble, Jim Bob. Ryou is very unhappy with me. Something about dumping Weevil into a fountain after covering him with green paint, I think. I'm pretty sure that it wasn't my fault. Anyway, I'm stuck up here in my room, grounded, all alone with my magazines… and you, Jim Bob:)

Of course, just because Ryou grounds me doesn't mean I have to listen. I could leave my room anytime I want to. …I just don't want to. I could probably use my Duel Monsters cards to give me an edge, but I think Ryou scared Dark Necrofear last time I brought her out, and the Man-Eater Bug won't eat Ryou because he's convinced he's a girl, so there's really nothing I can do. U.U

Except, what's this! Here, in my Psycho Monthly magazine, they are advertising a Chibifier 5000! n.n That sounds perfect! I could chibify Ryou and never have to listen to him again!

…But then who would drive me places? And cook for me?

…

--Eh, petty details can wait, can't they? I'm gonna order one! It's $59.99 plus shipping and handling. So where can I get that kind of money without earning it?

…Dinosaur boy. He was screaming something about finally winning a small sum from the… lotaly? Something like that. Ryou explained it to me once. Actually, I think it has the letter 'r' in it. But anyway, he has some money!

I know I have to be subtle about escaping from the house, finding Rex, and shamming him into money. Unfortunately, Ryou's friend Taylor says I'm about as subtle as a Togepi named Heavy Metal. If Yugi had an eggshell around him, he could be a Togepi.

When hikari left the house to do some shopping or knitting or whatever the heck it is he does when he leaves the house, I busted out my flamethrower and melted my window. Only it wasn't such a good idea, because a bird flew in and crapped on my bed. Unfortunately, you were on my bed, Jim Bob. So I washed you off with soap and water, but now you're all wet and it's hard to write on you. I may have to… replace—

EEP! I'm sorry! Don't kill me! Or give me paper cuts, or something dastardly like that! Or I may just dull your edges with Snapple!

So, like I said: I take out my flamethrower and melted the window. Then, I nimbly leap out. Some melting glass sticks to my pants. Now I have a cool glass design thing on the bottom of my jeans. :) Well, it's sort of a design. It's really more of a lump. O.O My Levi's have lumps!

So, yeah. I hop out of the window, all badass-like, hopping like a ballerina, and then I fall out of a tree and slink all the way to the Domino Museum. Yes, I slink all the way there. After this, I can say that I slunk to the museum. Is slunk a word? Maybe it's slinked. Well, however it's spelled, I did it! All the way there. Which basically mean I skulked over to the Museum in a suspicious and shifty fashion. n.n It was fun!

Then I get into a fight with a hobo over some cordon bleu. I win, but I spend all the cheese gambling at an Indian casino.

Then I arrive at the museum. I go inside. Then there's guy… his nametag reads Schuyler. What kind of a name is Schuyler anyway? Pfff! Is he, what, a shoe or something? Stupid name. But this Schuyler apparently wants me to… to pay to be inside the museum.

I shudder.

So I use my Hadoken on him. What's that, Jim Bob? You say I don't know how to use Hadoken? Oh, you'll find out…

Anyway, so the guy is… dead. …Well, actually, he is twitching a bit — or rather, convulsing. Like a defeated licker in Resident Evil 2. How do I know what that's like? I don't know.

I mosey (yes, mosey is a fun word for children of all ages to enjoy!) over to the part of the museum where they have large, statuesque dinosaur bones on display. And there's I find him.

Fex.

…I think that's his name.

"Hey, Fex!" I call out, using Bakura's voice. You know, sounding all nicey-nicey and stuff — it's sickening. Fex doesn;t turn around. "I said, 'Hey, Fex!' …HEY, FEX!"

Finally, dinosaur boy turns around, and looked around, bewildered. …I guess his name isn't Fex. Maybe it's Gex? It's worth a try.

"Hello, Gex," I say, stepping up to him and — ugh — smiling. But other than the smiling, I am so cool! Because I'm Bakura. And I'm a tomb robber. And I have a headless beanie baby collection that nobody knows about! And I stole the beanie babies from children! Mwahahaha! I'm so sadistic.

Gex turned to me. "Uh, you talking to me?"

I nod and smile — I mean, continue to smile. Dang, Ryou smiles a lot. "Of course, Gex."

"My name's not Gex."

I frown. What the heck is this ugly punk's name? "Of course… I'm just messing with you, Hex."

"It's not Hex either."

"Lex?"

"That's the bad guy in Superman, right? And in Smallville. Or is he the bad guy in Smallville? I dunno, I don't really watch the show. In any case, he's not me."

Dang.

"Uh… I'm just kidding, I knew it's… Rex."

Rex's eyes lit up. "Bingo! Ha ha, you sure had me going. What can I do ya for?"

He sounds like somebody from Animal Crossing. …Where do I know that game from?

"…Do you wanna give me sixty dollars?"

"Huh?"

"Wanna make sixty dollars?" I say. I try to do what hikari does when he asks somebody to do something for him, and smile reallyreally bigUnfortunately I don't think I'm doing it right, because the dino-boy grimaces and looks like I've just made a really foul smell—oh, wait. Never mind. H-ha ha ha.

Rex's eyes light up like two… big… headlights or something. "Sure!" he shouts in my ear. It bleeds. ;-;

"Ok then… I'll need you to give me sixty dollars." I hold out my hand. With my other hand, I write all this down in my journal. That's why this is in present tense, you know!

"Ok," Rex says. And like a fool, he gives it to me. "Now what?" he asks, but I am already rushing towards the exit of the museum. "Just tell me what to do when I see you later!" he says, waving. "Thanks Bakura!"

That fool… n.n