WOAH! Haven't updated this in a long long time. I wrote this chapter awhile ago; it's not finished, but I'm posting it up anyway because I feel bad for making you guys wait.

After deciding to leave the house in pursuit of something decidedly more interesting, I have decided that I am decidedly hungry. So I decided to go to Burger King.

There are many kings in Domino City. Yugi and/or the Pharaoh is/are the king/kings of Games. I am the King of Thieves (and at LEAST the Prince of Games, or Evil Archbishop of Games, or something.) And that strange man who waits outside your window for you to wake up to his breakfast brand of fast food is the Burger King.

Luckily, the Burger King can be met within a mile of Ryou's home. I push my way inside. It's the typical greasefest. Parents sitting at the booths next to overweight babies in strollers. If those parents feed those fat babies those french fries… Well, I guess they can get away with calling it "baby fat". Besides, Ryou says that people (a.k.a. himself and other GIRLS) think that all babies are cute.

So, I cut in front of everyone and come face to face with a pathetic adolescent.

"I demand to see the King of Burger," I say forcefully. 'Cause I'm forceful.

"…What are you writing?" the grease-haired boy asks, peering at my hands, which are steadily flying over you (and writing, too).

"Unimportant!! Bring me to the baagaaou," I say. He gives me a blank look. "…It means 'king of burgers'." More blankness. "In Japanese? You know, the language we speak? …I think? Although the author is using dub names—wait a minute, how do I know that??!"

While I agonize over my mysterious knowledge, this nincompoop (Ha: poop) continues to give me a glossy stare. And is his hair getting greasier? It's like he's in training to win the next Greasiest Hair World Cup. He's pretty good already; he's probably under the tutelage of Professor Snape.

"…" he 'says'.

"Fine!" I snap. "I'll just go ask for Col. Sanders! That'll teach you!"

"…" He's still not saying anything. I think he died. How weird…. and yet wonderful. This saves me the time I would've spent sending his a$$ to the Shadow Realm. (I bet you can't guess what the word with the dollar signs means, Jim Bob!)

LATER!

There it is, Jim Bob. KFC. A most popular source of food during the winter holidays in Japan. I open the door, and a voice rings out clearly above the sounds of people chewing their food like cows (and even occasionally mooing, for some reason):

"I demand to see Col. Sanders!!"

…Wait a sec. That's what I was going to say! Somebody beat me to it. And that someone's name is—

"I, Malik Ishtar, shall resolve my feud with Mr. Sanders by—"

"I say you he dead," says the redneck adolescent behind the counter. Malik dismisses him with a regal wave of his hand. (I could wave my hand more regally though. I'm better than my acquaintance in every way.)

"Do not attempt to sway me with your Family Guy quotes, however funny they may be!" he roars. (For example, I can roar better than him.) "I have a score to settle with the chicken man! Bring me the chicken man!"

"Yes! Bring us the chicken man!" I butt in. Malik glares at me.

"Um, excuse me, but this is my feud," he says stiffly.

"You're not excused," I retort curtly.

We have a staredown.

"…………..

"BRING US THE CHICKEN MAN!" we scream in unison.

LATER!

"How is it we always get kicked out of that places?" Malik asks. I shrug.

"It's a gift," I suggest.

"Maybe."

"I is," I insist. "A rare gift. We should be proud. How many people do you know that can say they've been kicked out of a fast food restaurant for demanding to see their leader?"

Malik stops in the middle of the sidewalk where we're walking, causing some people to crash into him. He doesn't notice; he just looks contemplative.

" 'Demanding to see their leader'?" he repeats. "That makes us sound like aliens."

"I know."

"With laser beams."

"And space ships," I add.

Malik grins. "Cool!"

We cackle. (Cackling is an important skill, Jim Bob, and we've got it down Pat, whoever that is.) And, as is always necessary with cackling, we cackle for an inordinately long amount of time, then both stop short at the same second. Then one of us lets out a single, last guffaw, (like a tiny burp after taking a long sip of soda,) and then we're done.

So, basically what I'm trying to say is, half an hour later we we're done cackling. So now what should we do?

"…Hey, 'Kura," Malik says.

"Yeah, 'Lik?" I reply, trying to sound cool.

"…That little tyke over there looks an awful lot like you…" He points over towards a chain link fence where the kids at Rintama High School play basketball.

"Eh?"

I peer over towards where he's pointing. And where Ryou the chibi is tied up to a tetherball pole.

…...

Wait, WHAT??

"Ryou—er, Enrique?" I call out tentatively. Malik gives me an odd look.

"Who's Enrique?" he asks. Dangit—I knew eventually someone was going to ask me this.

"Ryou's younger brother," I say smoothly.

"…That's a guy?" he says.

"As much of a guy as Ryou is," I say truthfully.

"So what's he doing with gang members?" Malik asks. I shrug. "…Should we do something?" I shrug again. "Ryou would probably be upset if his little brother got hurt." Ah. Well.

"You have no idea," I say. "Let's go 'do somethin'."

After Malik and I bust out into song, pretend to play guitar while riding in a flying car, and just generally be cool the same way the Britney Spears' song 'Do Something' is cool (Don't. Say. Anything.) we head on over to the basketball court, where gang members are spray painting 'We aer dum'.

"So boss, what's with the kid?" one of them asks. He turns to the "boss", who is big, burly, and wearing camouflage pants over his tutu (although the ruffles still poke out on top).

"Well, I was supposed to babysit someone named "Mad Dog" at 10 Maple Street, but the folks weren't home. Instead I just found the kid."

…We live at 12 Maple Street. He went to the wrong house and kidnapped my child host. -.- Oh how smart this man is. I am in awe. …Not.

"Hirutani," another guy says, "we have to look after this snot-nosed guy all day?"

Hey now! My host may be girly, but pansies are actually a very clean people. He is not 'snot-nosed'.

"Well…" Hirutani scratches under his arm, making him look like a giant white gorilla. "I guess so."

"Don't you know anything about baby-sitting at all, boss?" asks another. Hirutani is too busy eating a banana. …You know, he really does look like a—

"MONKEY BOSS!"

…That's what I was going to say! Who said that?

Hirutani sneers. "Joey Wheeler," he says.

Joey stands halfway across the basketball court, Yugi tittering nervously behind him.

"…Is that a little boy?" Yugi asks, peering around Joey and scrutinizing the scene before him.

"I'm his babysitter," Hirutani says proudly. (To give you an idea of how this gorillaman sounds… Have you heard of Brian Regan, Jim Bob? You have? Well, he sounds like the kid who says… "The big yellow one is the sun! The yellow one is the sun!")

"Babysitter?" Joey says in disbelief. Even Yugi snickers. Yugi 'Where's My Bamboo!?' Motoh is snickering at this gorillaboy.

"Yes," Hirutani says, unperturbed. It's kind of disconcerting how he doesn't see something different about himself, an obvious gang member, babysitting a small child. "This is 'Mad Dog'."

"…Doesn't that look like Ryou?" Joey says.

Yugi stares at the chibi. "Hey yeah…"

"His name is 'Mad Dog,'" Hirutani says.

"Ryou's younger brother's name is Mad Dog?" Yugi wonders.

"That's a guy?!" Joey asks.

"That's what I said," Malik adds in. We're watching the scene from the other side of the chain link fence.

"Malik!?" Joey says.

"Bakura!?" Yugi says.

"Bakura?" That's Joey.

"Malik!" Yugi.

"You guys?" Malik responds. "Yes, it's us, you dimwits."

They stare at us.

"…Dimwits?" Yugi repeats, sounding like he's about to cry. He needs to—

Hirutani scoffs, "Oh, get over it, you baby!" …That's what I was gunna say! Monkeyman beat me to it.

"Really," Malik adds, brushing a lock of hair behind his ear.

"We are not dim," Joey challenges. Malik opens his mouth to make a preppy, cheerleader-meantastic (new word of the day) retort, but monkey man beats him to it.

"Yes you are," he says.

"Are not," Joey says.

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too." (…You get the idea, Jim Bob. I really don't want to write down how long this conversation is taking…)

While they go back and forth, another member of the game turns and sees Malik and me. "Who are you?" he asks stupidly.

"I'm the Archbishop of Games," I retort. Malik gives me 'a look'. "I am," I hiss.

"Are too!" Joey's screaming now.

"Are not!" Hirutani yells.

…Wow. They aer dum.

Yugi ambles over to where Ryou is, and unties Ryou from the tetherball pole. Then he ambles over towards us.

"Are," Joey growls, cracking his knuckles.

"No way," Hirutani hisses, flexing his arms.

"It feels like something's heating up," Malik says.

"Can I leave with you?" Yugi asks us. We face fault. He gives us a shy grin. "I don't know what I'm thinking 'bout," he says.

"Really? Leaving with you?" Malik asks incredulously.

"I like that song," I say.

The two give me a weird look. "What song?" they ask.

Ok, so originally I'm sure there was supposed to be more to this chapter. But I haven't updated in forever and I feel like I owe it to update with celerity. So I guess all that's left is to end this chapter in the usual fashion, with a threat: Review or Hirutani will shove bananas in your eyes. And in case you're wondering what anime Hirutani's from, he's actually from Yu-Gi-Oh (the manga, anyway). 2 more reviews and I'll have 200! Keep 'em coming and I'll try to write another chapter soon!