Title: Crossfire

Author: Jusrecht

See Warnings and Disclaimers in the first chapter. As for this chapter, if lack of AsuKira-ness can be counted as a warning, then it's the warning. This chapter is dedicated to every ShinnCaga fan who has been waiting for something to happen to this pairing. Not that there is much development, but still, better than nothing…

I'm sorry for the long gap between updates. I was (and still am actually) distracted by Code Geass and Gundam 00, but your reviews continue to encourage me. Thank you so much. Here it is, the next chapter of 'Crossfire'.

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Chapter Twenty: Shinn – Hell

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Since a long time ago, there had always existed this thing called the strength of will in this world. Its main purpose was to lend someone enough conviction than an utter disaster could turn out fine in the end if he only had the courage to see it through the end.

Shinn felt that in the last few weeks, this particular strength had mutinied against him.

First, the explosion of the shuttle and his incapability to cope up with the subsequent chain of cause-and-effect. He had just scraped through the whole ordeal and nasty guilt when Cygnusia happened, stunning the world into shock and disgust. Despair returned faster than gale at the prelude of a storm, but suddenly, unexpectedly, a ray of sunlight pierced through the brewing tempest. Bliss set its feet on battle-worn ground and for a few days, Shinn had known how to hope again, learnt to believe again. He didn't remember how dangerous it was to revel in delight too much when uncertainties still loomed on the horizon.

It only took the slightest tug to tip the scale. Or a drop of poison.

When the news had reached him for the first time, he remembered staring at Fllaga's panic-strewn face like the older man had lost his last shred of sanity. After all, who in the world at this age would use poison to try killing someone? There were eons of more effective methods – and not to mention, much less dramatic, less movie-like – but when Kira called him to the hospital, doubt and fear began to spawn inside his heart.

The phrase 'sent tumbling into the deepest pit of hell from the seventh heaven' couldn't even begin to describe how he felt when he saw Cagalli, pale-faced and unconscious, lying on the hospital bed with tubes attached to her wrist. He barely heard a word when Kira told him about the additional duties he had to attend in his place because as her brother, he would have to stay at her side, at least until her condition had stabilized. It was a good thing that his coworker was also there because Shinn really had no idea what he was listening at.

It felt like he had lost the center of his balance. Unlike the cold horror which had swallowed him after he had heard of the plane which had carried Athrun, this was strange, almost hollow. Never a pain had been so intangible for him, or crossed with such unfamiliarity that made him feel scared beyond his wits. Like he had lost something important he didn't even know what.

He realized what it was thirty-six hours later, when he was staring at his desk clock and remembered that on this day, at this hour, every week, he would go to Representative Athha's office and deliver a report of his investigation.

It was her.

Shinn continued to stare at the clock, unaware that his breath had been caught in his throat for some time. Even the realization felt strange. For the life of him, he had never imagined that something like this could…

Suddenly he had an urge to run far, far away, preferably to somewhere remote and uninhabited, and scream.

Shinn stood up and began to pace around his desk, his brain still shrieking denials. It was absurd! Unthinkable! In fact, it was the very peak of impossibility itself! How could he allow this to happen? He had hated her and everything she stood for for so long. Although that hate had, admittedly, given way to something friendlier in the past two or three years, although she had attained his grudging respect, although deep down inside he had known that she wasn't responsible for the death of those he loved…

He stopped pacing and stared at the clock again. Suddenly those denials sounded weak and completely unimportant, because what he faced right now was the fact that Cagalli might not survive the poisoning. And the possibility frightened him. No matter what excuses he came up with, it would always return to this fear – this enigmatic, maddening, chilling fear.

Shinn sank to the floor next to his desk, head buried between his hands as he felt tears behind his eyelids. He was frustrated, confused, angry. He didn't know what to do and it wasn't as if he could do anything to help her. It was different, a part of his mind reflected through the frenzied haze in his mind. With Athrun, the pain was old. He had been used to it and even though each time felt worse than before, he had lived with it for so long that he could no longer separate one from the rest.

But by God, if he could help it, he didn't want to lose Cagalli. It was enough. He couldn't lose another person he loved.

Shinn straightened up and wiped away the tears angrily. He shouldn't cry. Everything might feel wrong but he hadn't lost her yet. Not yet. They were still fighting this battle.

But on the other hand, he also had no idea how she was at the moment. For a moment, he contemplated the idea of going to the hospital and forcing his way through the tight security which he knew had been prepared to deal with visitors. Or maybe not. Maybe he could search for Kira and just ask him.

Unfortunately, he didn't know where his superior currently was, and even if he did, he wasn't sure if it was appropriate to bother him at the moment. Despite his resolve to stay at his sister's side, the general had been forced to leave her because ORB needed him. The whole country seemed to have completely stopped in its track, too stunned by what had happened to their leader. Kira had no choice but to step forward and fill the gap Cagalli had left.

Shinn didn't know how he did it. With his sister hovering on the brink of death, Kira still could find enough strength to pull ORB back to its feet. To say that he was perfectly unaffected would be an outright lie, but still, the strength he had shown left Shinn wondering if it was even human to possess that much willpower.

Maybe it was because of Athrun.

He couldn't help a tiny, little smile, followed by a frown. The news had come as an utter shock to him, but it had slowly dissolved into a quiet 'oh'. Resigned acceptance. Then suspicion caught up, but the tired look on Kira's face advised him against asking. In the end, he decided that if it was what the general wanted to believe in the wake of his sister's poisoning, he could play the part.

A sound coming from the door made Shinn flinch. His reaction wasn't fast enough and Fllaga had already walked in when he was still in the middle of an attempt to stand up, furiously wiping his face with his sleeves. The older man stopped in his track, looking at him from the doorway with an astonished expression on his face.

"What are you doing?"

Shinn felt like a deer caught in a headlight. He turned around quickly to hide his face and answered gruffly, "Nothing."

He heard the sound of the door being closed and brisk footsteps approaching. "Did something happen?" his coworker asked again, anxiety starting to shade his voice.

"No."

"Then why are you–"

"I said it's nothing!" Shinn snapped, his own voice ringing painfully in his head. Fllaga was not making this easier for him.

There was a moment of silence and Shinn found himself preparing a list of vicious answers in case the older man dared to touch the subject again. The long sigh coming from his coworker, however, told him that it was unnecessary.

"If you say so," the other man sounded defeated and irritated at the same time. "Something happened on my end though, if you care to know."

Shinn looked around fast, already forgetting about the dampness on his face, and flinched when Fllaga slammed his uniform cap on his document-filled table. The older man's face was dark and sullen, like he had just swallowed something thoroughly disgusting, and suddenly Shinn felt his mouth getting dry. It was either he had offended him that much or…

"Representative Ath–"

"No," Fllaga had cut him before he could finish that sentence. "Nothing that bad, but close enough. About two hours ago, PLANT contacted the office of the Head Representative. They refused to endorse the new design of Neutron-jammer. Said they wanted to re-evaluate the design."

"What do you mean refuses?" he demanded, a frown making its way to his brow. "They have signed the agreement."

He was promptly corrected. "Chairman Zala signed the agreement."

"But the Supreme Council has agreed!"

"Through a vote. With three council members substituted and Hayes being the temporary chairman, the situation has changed."

"I thought he's a great supporter of Athrun!" Shinn could hear his tone of voice getting more and more frustrated.

"He is," the older man nodded, sounding increasingly calmer instead, "but the outcome of the vote is different this time. The yea vote lost by a margin of two."

Barely resisting an overwhelming urge to run to the nearest mobile suit available and beat the crap out of PLANT, Shinn settled for kicking the leg of his desk. "This is ridiculous," he hissed and looked again at Fllaga who was eyeing him warily. "How do you know all these?"

"Representative Kelan was ranting to me all the way from the national security meeting."

"It's a mistake to choose him as the temporary chief," he muttered and plopped himself down in a chair. Nim Kelan was nothing like Cagalli, but his family was the second most powerful in ORB after the Athha, which sadly only had one member at the moment. After the poisoning incident, it seemed reasonable to choose him as Cagalli's replacement for the time being, because after all, no one believed that the Lioness of ORB would give in to a trick as cowardly as poisoning.

Fllaga made a noise of assent but the look on his face was unhappy. "The choice isn't ours," he said heavily. "All we can do is to give our utmost support to Kira. He really has a lot in his hands right now. There's the Cygnusia case still and then this thing with the separatist group."

Shinn closed his eyes for a moment and braced himself for another wave of bad news. "What separatist group?" he asked wearily.

"Something called the Flame of ORB," the other man told him. "They suddenly got very active these past few days. Maybe because of what happened to our Head Representative."

He snorted. "Sounds like a bunch of cowards to me."

"Or smart people who recognize the right time to act," Fllaga said neutrally and when Shinn shot him a withering look, quickly added, "Anyway, we should be really careful from now on. Kira needs every help he can get."

That was at least true. Most of the upper echelons of the military trusted the general, having witnessed his capacity and determination themselves during the great war and many skirmishes afterward. The fact that he was Cagalli Yula Athha's long-lost brother only contributed to his escalating reputation. It wasn't at all surprising to see that many had opted turning to him in time of crisis.

"Kelan depends on him a lot," Shinn murmured to himself.

"Yes, but that makes me a little worried," Fllaga said with a frown. "Some of the other representatives don't like this arrangement very much. Even though Kira is unofficially substituting Cagalli, he doesn't exactly have a claim on the Athha house, does he?"

It made Shinn reconsider submitting to his earlier urge, only he would beat the crap out of ORB's representatives this time. "They're fretting over lineage in this condition?" he asked, torn between anger and incredulity.

The older man made a helpless gesture. "They're nobles, Shinn. According to them, lineage is one of the very few things worth fretting about in this world."

"I can't believe this."

"We should've gotten used to unbelievable things by now, don't you think?" Fllaga commented matter-of-factly.

"Aren't you worried?" he barked, irritated that the other man seemed to be able to find the matter much less serious than he was.

But Fllaga didn't answer. His eyes were fixed to the television which was broadcasting afternoon news. Shinn followed his line of sight and felt the breath caught in his throat when he caught a glimpse of long, pink hair. Looking around quickly, he grabbed the control lying on his desk to increase the volume.

"…a shooting incident which has disrupted the meeting between two head of states in Berlin. No one has been reported injured in this incident, including Mediator Lacus Clyne who was also present at the meeting. One shooter has been detained by Eurasian Federation Army, but he is believed to have an accomplice who has managed to escape…"

"I shouldn't say anything about getting used to unbelievable things," Fllaga sounded almost angry to himself. "Hell, what is this world becoming into?"

Hell, Shinn thought to himself. There was no other word for it.

End Chapter Twenty

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Notes: This is the last time I end a chapter with this kind of cliffhanger, I promise. Thank you for reading and please review.