I'm soooooo sorry I couldn't update for so long! I really hope you haven't lost interest in the story. As always, read and review!

I ripped through the lush foliage, my chest being peirced with two kinds of hatred. A hatred for Logan, which I couldn't understand. And a hatred for myself, for what I'd done to him. I felt my foot grab on to a creeper, and I flew faced down in the dirt. Sobs ripped out my chest, acid tears running down my cheeks.

It took alot to make me cry.

Only a few seconds after I'd tripped, I felt a hand lightly press on my shoulder. Logan. The hatred for him had dissolved out of my body by now, leaving me weak. But the trace, the memory, of it...made me sick. I shakily pulled myself up, avoiding the smoldering eyes that had put me in a state of hypnosis earlier. I glanced at the spot on his shoulder where my claws had impaled him. The healing factor had grafted the skin together seamlessly.

The walk that took us back to the mansion was a blur, as I had been too enveloped in self-hatred to take in any of the scenery. I was only vaguely aware of Logan's hand on my shoulder. But I wasn't too enveloped to notice he hadn't put it around my waist. I slipped silently through the corriders to the dorm I'd been sleeping in. Xavier would know of what happend soon enough, in fact, he probably already did. For some reason, I didn't want him to know. Perhaps it was shame, after all...I'd been completely in a nirvana of love and lust, and then... I'd ran him through with my claws. But for whatever reason, all I knew was that the aversion to telepaths was acting up again. Probably because I wasn't really ready for anyone, not even Logan himself to know what I felt.

I sat there, lying on my bed in the small dorm. Hating myself. I wanted to get away, but not because of freedom this time. This time, it was...I didn't know what it was. Shame, hatred, even anger. Either way, I realized with an intense burst of emotion that, that, that I couldn't do that again. Go through it again. I couldn't hate Logan.

I pulled myself up again, my mind resolute. Running away wasn't the best choice, but I couldn't hurt Logan. It was like I couldn't control myself when I had hurt him. I couldn't risk it, losing control again and...doing something I would regret.

What obstacles would I have? Magneto trying to capture me or kill me or whatever it was he wanted? Let him. I didn't really care what would happen. Would someone try to stop me from leaving? I'd like to see them try. What if I met up with Creed, the disgusting mutant called Sabretooth? I almost wanted to meet him, just to hurt something.

I hurled my few possessions into a bag. I pulled on the tennis shoes I always wore. I pulled my long, tangled hair into a pony tail. I took a deep breath, taking in the last few glimpses of the room I'd possibly ever see.

Once I'd stored a mental photo of this room to memory, I turned toward the door. But a glint of something caught my eye. I stopped and placed the bag on the floor, walking silently toward the dresser. The only thing left on the bare wooden surface, I realized with surprise, was the dogtags I'd worn as an ankle bracelet. I picked them up carefully, remembering the first time in the bar, when I'd met Logan. He'd stared at the tags instead of my chest.

I held them up, running two fingers over the cold metal, memorizing the indents on the surface. I read the single word it held, with the same curiosity I'd always had when wondering about what it meant. In bold, Caps letters, it read:

COUGAR

It was followed by a random series of numbers, but I'd never truly cared what they were. It was the Cougar that mystified me. Delicately, I slipped the tags onto my ankle, feeling the cool metal against my skin. I felt whole. Or almost whole.

Retagged, I pulled up the bag that held my things and slipped silently out the door. I managed to glide through the labrynth of hallways without meeting anyone, and finally came to the large oak double doors that led to the back entrance. I turned back to the school almost longingly. I had to admit...this place was the safest place I'd ever stayed. It almost felt like a home. But, I realized with a jolt, I didn't have a home.

I whirled around and started through the doors, watching the road in front of me. Moonlight glinted off the asphalt of the slim highway. I would have preffered to ride on the motorcycle, but a bike would make too much noise. I gazed into the distance, my mind wandering what I would meet, where I would go. It was an unsure question, but I'd answer it soon enough. With a burst of resolution, I started forward into the night.

Goodbye Logan.

Sorry that was short, but I need to post a chapter quickly. I hope you like it, and I hope we get our new computer soon. So read and review!

Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men (I didn't even know we had to have a disclaimer before, so this applies to all the other chapters without one!)