A/N: Yes... have nothing to say.

Chapter 3 – Women Problems?

"Rose sweetheart, what're you doin' up?" were Jackie's first words as they stepped into the front room, finally fully cleaned and clothed. "You should be in bed."

"Sorry mum, just needed a walk," the Doctor said quickly, shooting Rose a side glance.

"Alright sweetheart, but you'll get back into bed won't you?"

He nodded, raising a small smile for his – he gulped – mother.

"Hungry?" she asked, directly addressing the Doctor in Rose's body, but instantly Rose took this to mean her.

"Yeah actually," she said before she could stop herself, her deep voice coming something of a surprise even though she'd have thought she'd be used to it by now. Suddenly Jackie went rigid, expression one of vague surprise as she stared at Rose.

"I was actually asking my daughterif you don't mind, Doctor," she replied coolly, staring at her with incredible disdain. Rose went bright red.

"S-sorry…" she stuttered, head dropping to the floor. Jackie raised an eyebrow, laughing.

"No comeback? No insult to the 'uman species, eh Doctor?"

"Mum…" the Doctor decided he'd had enough of this. "Leave he-…him alone, would you?"

She sighed, loudly. "Alright. Have some fruit Rose, it'll make you feel better." She disappeared into the kitchen, leaving the Doctor and Rose alone in the living room. They quickly turned to each other as Rose reached for some fruit.

"Okay, I think she's buying it," the Doctor commented, checking Jackie had closed the kitchen door behind her. "We've just got to keep it up for a bit until we can start tracking the Hashmou down."

Rose nodded, taking a bite into the pear she held. "And how long is that gonna ta…" she suddenly trailed off to nothing, pulling the pear away from her mouth and staring at it with disgust. "Urrgh!" she shrieked, dropping the pear onto the table and grabbing her throat as the horrible taste course its way down into her stomach. "Oh God that's disgustin'!"

"Yeah by the way, I don't like pears," the Doctor said calmly, dropping onto the sofa and readjusting his bra. He was attempting to hide his amusement – and failing dismally.

"You coulda warned me earlier!" Rose growled, close to regurgitating.

He was laughing out loud now, unable to hold it in. She desperately wanted to slap him but knew she'd only be slapping her own body. She put on a smirk and quickly bit into an apple to get rid of the taste.

"Yeah well it's not me who'll come back to this body and have the taste in their mouth for weeks!" she declared. That shut him up. Infact, he seemed to have an expression of mild shock on his face.

"Rose…" he whispered, suddenly paralysed in his seat. "Something's…oh Rassilon…Rose!"

"What?" Rose asked, her amusement dying down as she registered his shocked expression. Was her body okay? She instantly began to get worried as she moved over and knelt down infront of him. "What's wrong?"

"Rose…" he moaned again, "oh please, help me…"

"What? What is it?!" she demanded to know, shaking him by the shoulder.

His eyes snapped back to her, filled with fear and shock as his tone lowered into a hysterical whisper, "something's coming out of my bits!"

Rose stared at him. "Umm, what?"

"There!" He gestured towards the area between his legs. "Something's coming out!"

Rose realised what it was, and all anxiety dissipated. "Oh, you mean you just got your period."

"My what?!" he shrieked in a whisper, "what do I do?!"

She was almost laughing now. "Your period! Have you never heard of a period?" His expression said it all. "Okay, calm down, it's not serious. You need to go to the bathroom and check the cupboard. On the top shelf there's a pack of tampons. You need to put one in your hole, okay?"

"Which hole?! There are so many!" He was staring at her and Rose was now doing everything in her power to stop herself from dying of laughter.

"The one the red stuff is comin' out of."

"Red stuff!" he almost screamed in his whisper. "Blood!?"

"Doctor it's okay! It's not really blood! And it's natural, alright? Just go do what I told you to. I really don't mind you lookin' now, okay? You're gonna have to."

"Okay…" He got slowly onto two feet, trying to make his walk look as casual as possible before he entered the bathroom.