What's up people? On some random impulse of mine, I have decided to write a high school fic starring the D.Gray-Man cast! Now, unlike other school fics, this one has a plot. Isn't that nice? If you've read my other DGM fic, Ephemeral Sorrows, know that this is nothing like that. I want to write something lighthearted for once. Of course, Kanda…never mind. The point is, even if you've read my gothic angsty Road fic thing, read this one too. And review, because reviews get me to work overtime.

The plot won't start until it does, so for a while, they'll be some nice AllenxRoad, LenaleexLavi, AllenxLenalee fluff. Of course, I don't really know how to write fluff…

Disclaimer: D.Gray-Man belongs to Hoshino Katsura.

The Clownish Exchange Student From Another Land

"Praise the Earl…praise the Earl…praise the Earl…"

"Heh heh heh…" A fat man in a strange hat laughed. "Yes my children…continue to worship and your power will grow…"

"Obey the Earl…the Earl's word is law…the law of the Cult of Millennium…"

--

Road was fantasizing again. What was going on through her head is her own business, but if you must know, it had nothing to do with the normal fantasies of a hormonally-challenged high school girl. Knowing that, now you won't mistake the moans of pleasure and sighs of ecstasy coming out of her while she was daydreaming as something else. Wait…you were just thinking about something perverted right now, weren't you? But strange thoughts aside, Road was an interesting student with childish tendencies. Just how was she interesting? Eh…I'll tell you later…

"Ahh…yes…" Road muttered in her sleep. "Oooh…wow…so nice…ahh…" She giggled. "No…don't touch that…ehee hee hee…"

Lavi stared at his sleeping classmate. "Hey, Road, are you okay?"

Lavi was the straight-A student who violated the dress code on a daily basis. His eyepatch and headband got him in trouble and made everyone think Lavi was the gangsta-on-campus. If gangstas got good grades and was part of the Bookman club.

"Just stick that in there…and this in that…ohhh yesss…" Road smiled dreamily. "…so much blood…"

A large sweatdrop appeared on Lavi's forehead. "What a sadistic girl…" Lavi shook his head. "Ah well, Road will be Road." He turned to Lenalee. "Hey, Lenalee, could we trade partners? I don't think Road will be that much of a help to my Biology grade." Lenalee was staring out a window, completely ignoring Lavi. "Hey, Lenalee? Are you listening to me? Lenalee!"

Lenalee was Lavi's (you may omg here) girlfriend. It all started in middle school, where they met. They got along really well, and this led to that, and Road pushed Lavi's face on Lenalee's forcing them to kiss. Then Lenalee's brother and guardian, Komui, threatened Lavi with a drill if he even touched Lenalee. And from a rebellious impulse, they started dating in secret. The secret relationship that everybody but Komui knew about.

Lenalee turned to Lavi. "Huh, what'd you say, Lavi?"

"Ah, I knew it. You weren't listening." Lavi sighed. "You depress me sometimes."

"I'm sorry," Lenalee said, "I was just thinking about last night's homework."

"Oh, was it because I kept you too busy last night?"

Road suddenly woke up. "Eh! Was Lavi doing ecchi things with Lena-chan last night?" Road sighed. "Aww…I wanted to corrupt Lenalee first…"

Lavi slapped his hand on the table. "What are you talking about!?" Lavi shouted. "I was talking on the phone with her last night!"

"But you were talking about ecchi things, right?"

"That's it!" Lavi leapt at Road. "You're so dead!"

Road laughed. "What's wrong, La-La? I thought you'd be flattered?" Road wrapped her arms around Lavi. "Unless…you'd rather have me instead of Lena-chan." She licked her lips. "Well if you insist, La-La. But I have to warn you, when I play, I play."

"Shaddup, Road!" Lavi threw her off.

"You are rough." Road taunted. "But if you wanna play with me you have to be rougher!"

Lenalee shook her head. "Honestly, I can't tell if she's sadistic, perverted, childish, or some weird combination of the three…" Lenalee pulled Lavi and Road apart. "Hey! You know that this is the reason everybody calls us the weirdos of class 3-A?

Road smiled. "This is what you get when you have friends like us, Lena-chan."

Lavi put his arm around Lenalee. "Besides, don't you love us, Lenalee?" A smile escaped Lenalee's face.

Road laughed happily and wrapped herself around Lenalee. "I knew Lena-chan can't stay mad at us."

"Hey, get offa her, Road." Lavi said, "She's my girlfriend. And don't even think about doing that chu thing with her."

"Oh?" Road asked. "You mean…this?"

The classroom door suddenly opened, revealing what looked like an old man with long white hair standing at the door. The man saw Lenalee, Road, and Lavi. "Ah, I'm sorry! I didn't know there was a yuri club at this school." He flushed a deep shade of red. "If you could just point me in the direction of-"

"It's a pedophile!" Road cried out. "Lena-chan, go hide while me and La-La beat him up!"

Lavi rolled up his sleeves. "Heh…it's been a while since I hit someone…" He cracked his knuckles.

"Eh!?" the man said, "W-wait! I'm not an old man! I'm a-"

"GET HIM!!" Road and Lavi jumped on top of the guy.

"Ah! T-that hurts! Quit it! Ow! Stop! Gaahhhhhhh!!"

"WAIT!" Lenalee shouted.

Road and Lavi stopped punching the guy. "What, Lenalee?" Lavi asked, "Can't you see we're trying to protect you?"

"Yeah…" Road smiled evilly. "By the time I'm done with him, red will be his least favorite color…"

"But I'm not an old man…"

"Eh?" Lavi and Road said simultaneously. "You're not?"

"N-no." the boy stood up and pushed back his hair. "I-I'm a new foreign exchange student. My name is Allen Walker."

Road gazed into Allen's eyes. "As Lavi used to say…STRIKE!" She grabbed Allen's hand. "I'm so sorry Mr. Foreign Exchange Student, my friend Lavi here forced me to attack you. Forgive me…"

"Wha! I didn't-"

Road kicked him away. "Pay no attention to him, he just doesn't understand how cute that white hair of yours makes you…"

"Eh?" Allen said.

"Please…let me give you my apologies…" She kissed Allen fiercely.

"EH!?" Lenalee and Lavi shouted. Lavi pulled Road away from Allen. "I'm so sorry, Allen was it? This girl is just a little crazy sometimes…"

Road slapped him. "Don't pull me away from MY Allen! Just give me a few minutes with him!"

"You just met him!" Lenalee pointed out.

Allen stared in shock at Road. "Th-that was my first kiss…" He fainted.

"Eh! Allen!" Road ran over to him. "Do you need mouth-to-mouth?"

"D-don't take advantage of him while he's unconscious!" Lavi shouted.

"But he's sooooooooo cute!"

"Road!"