I actually think I'm having fun writing this fanfic. And now that it's summer vacation, I should have time to write this and others. That is, if I don't get a job...wait, no money...which means no manga...oh well, that's why people scan that sweet stuff on the Internet.

Chapter 2

L's fascination of the dead laptop had no end. He was still sitting in front of it, like he was just a little while ago, poking its screen. He was leaving tiny finger prints all over it. Just another thing Light would get annoyed with when he got home.

"I wonder what could have possibly happened to it?" L said to himself. He stood up and decided to head back over to the kitchen to finish off his ice cream and strawberries. He sat down at the table, with his knees up to his chin, and started eating his strawberries again. "I wouldn't doubt that Kira killed it off because I was getting too close. My detecting skills must have increased."

L looked up at the tiny black TV that was sitting on a shelf near the ceiling. He picked up a strawberry and threw it at the TV, hitting a button. The TV flickered on and showed him one of the news channels, giving him a good look at a horrible traffic accident on some highway.

"Take that, Kira!" shouted L. "I do, in fact, have skill!"

He chuckled to himself and shoved a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth. The traffic accident scene was over, and the news station brought him back to two newscasters who were now talking about a baseball game that had taken place the other night. L was looking straight up at the ceiling with the spoon still in his mouth. He slowly pulled it out, placing it back into more ice cream.

"I guess I should fix Light-kun's computer before he gets home," he said. "Light-kun would become very cross with me if he found out what had happened. I just need to find a way." He pulled his spoon out of the bowl with new ice cream on it. "He would kill me." In shock, he dropped his utensil back into the bowl and stood up in excitement. "A perfect plan to see if he's Kira! If he kills me, than it must be true!"

"With later news, one of the world's computer geniuses, Bill Gates, has yet again donated to another company for the advancement in its computer technology…"

L's gaze turned to the TV to see one of the newscasters pull up a picture of Bill Gates himself. L walked over to one of the drawers and yanked it open, revealing the remote control. He turned the volume up and listened intently to the man on the screen.

"Bill Gates has donated at least five million dollars to Geek Squad for its honorable work in the past year," said the man. "When questioned, he said 'It was just a little bit of money I could give to them in my spare time.' But some people think it's just a scam to get them to work harder and increase their amount of spare workers for the others who have lost their sanity while working on the job, which leads us back to the theory of alien invasion…"

"So Bill's done it again," muttered L. "I told him donating large amounts of money like that would get him into trouble."

Suddenly, his mind began working ten times as fast as it usually does, which means there was a good chance smoke was coming out of his ears and he didn't even know it. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and flipped it open. Going through his contact list as fast as he could, L found what he was looking for. He pressed the green button and held the phone at least a foot away from his ear. He lowered the volume on the TV.

Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…Ring…

That was all he heard for the next two minutes, but L hadn't hung up. He was determined to reach his pitifully small goal. Finally, he heard someone pick up and started talking before the other person said a word.

"Hello, Bill, it's L again, I need a fa--who is this?...His secretary? When did Bill acquire a secretary?...Well, this is his cell phone, I would think he wouldn't need anyone but himself to answer it…"

He leaned up against the counter. Noting that there were sugary cereal boxes just above his head, he opened up the cabinet as the woman on the other end babbled on about how honored she was to have the job of answering Bill Gates' cell phone.

The detective ripped open a new box of Cap'n Crunch and placed it on the counter, popping the little red balls into his mouth.

"Excuse me, ma'am, as interesting as it is to hear how much he's paying you to answer his personal phone, I would like to speak to Bill Gates…Rude? How am I being rude? I just would like to speak to him about something very important that only he could possibly figure out…You don't know where he is? Well, when you see him, tell him--why are you crying?…Because I won't talk to you? Ma'am, you're a secretary, people like myself don't exactly stay on the phone with people like you talking all day…"

L jumped into the air as the woman started screaming into his ear. It was now two feet away from his head. A dangerous new distance for L.

"Please, don't cry, I didn't mean to make you so upset…Yes, that's right, I'm trying to be nice because I don't like it when women start crying to me on the phone, it tends to become very annoying…What did you just say?…Call you Charlotte? Ma'am, I have no intention on calling you that…Wait, excuse me? A connection between us? No ma'am, you thought wrong, there is nothing between us. Now, please, just let me leave a message for Bill because that's who I intended on speaking to--"

"I KNEW YOU WERE GAY!"

A click was heard and the phone line went dead. L had turned into a statue through the small process of being screamed at by some random woman. His arm was in mid grab for more cereal and his eyes never blinked through the whole conversation with her. Very slowly, he closed his phone and placed it on the counter. A chill ran up his spine, sending him into shivers, ruffling his hair up even more.

"What a scary woman!" said L, as he finally got some cereal and put it into his mouth. "She was quite the unstable person, which makes me believe that it was that special time of the month for her. Never again will I speak to her."

L's cell phone began ringing. He stared at it with his wide eyes, afraid to pick it up. It could be her. So, instead, he listened to his very stylish ringtone.

"It's a piece of cake to bake a pretty cake, if the way is hazy! You gotta do the cooking by the book. You know you can't be lazy! Never use a messy recipe. The cake will end up crazy…"

When the song was over, he settled down again. He picked up the bag of Cap'n Crunch and brought it over to the table. He stared at the foods that were in front of him. Ice cream. Strawberries. And cereal. L poured the cereal into the bowl of ice cream and plopped some strawberries along with it.

"The perfect breakfast." L said with a smile.

His phone began ringing again, but L paid no mind to it. He was too busy eating his personal breakfast. The phone kept on ringing and ringing, until its vibrations made it fall on to the floor. L heard this and turned around, whining a bit. He liked his phone. He took good care of it. But to make it fall on to the floor, with the chance of it being scratched...

"Who ever is calling had better have a good reason," he said, as he got up and walked over to his phone. "I find it very annoying for people to repeatedly call me."

"We gotta have it made! You know that I love cake! Finally, it's time to make a cake!"

He saw that the caller id was labeled 'Bill Gates' work phone' and quickly answered it.

"Hello, Bill?…You're not Bill Gates, you're the same woman from before! How did you get his work phone?…I know you're his secretary, but only for his cell phone. He's supposed to be off today…Oh, so he got some extra hours. But how did you get my number?…You saved it…Do you know what I must do now that you have gotten my number without my permission?…"

He waited a moment for dramatic silence and then continued.

"It's actually very simple. I will send a mass team of FBI agents down to Bill Gates' company, where you will most likely be forced into a car and driven to their headquarters, where I will then order them to erase your memory. You will be strapped down to a cold table and then the process will begin, starting with cutting off your tongue as a personal order from myself."

Once again, the phone line went dead. L smiled to himself as he shut his phone, walked back over to his seat, and finally started to eat his strawberry filled ice cream cereal.

Hey, did anyone figure out what's L's ringtone?

Cooking by the Book by Lazytown

I can actually see Misa singing that song, ya know, with her hair pink and wearing that puffy cooking outfit...anyway...

Review, or else L will send FBI agents to cut off your tongue too!