Woot! Yays, new chapter! I kinda like this chapter, so let's see what you guys think about it. Let me ask you something...what do you guys think about random Russian dudes and doggy hats?

Chapter 3

L scratched his head staring into the living room from the kitchen table.

"How can I fix that annoying piece of metal?" he asked himself. He stuck his thumb to his lip again. "If Bill Gates can not be communicated with, I will just have to deal with this problem on my own."

He got up from his seat and walked back into the living room. L sat himself on the ground, directly across the room from the laptop. He stared it down, gazing into its shiny screen. L moved his thumb every so often. Nothing came to mind. Even after looking at nothing but the problem he faced, the world's greatest detective could come up with nothing.

And then it hit him. Like one of Light's sticks of deodorant.

"It said that it had a virus!" exclaimed L. "And to take care of a virus, one must take medication! Of course!" He got to his feet in pride. "And the only place in this house to acquire such medical needs is anywhere that Light-kun ventures!"

The apartment's five phones suddenly started going off. L slowly walked over to the one that was on the wall next to the living room's flat screen TV and looked at the caller id. It said 'Bill Gates' phone'. L pulled out a lollipop from his pants, sticking it into his mouth.

"Something must be done about this woman first. She does not give up easily. But I'm just too caught up with this obstacle to contact the FBI right now…"

After disconnecting all the phones in the apartment--for this Charlotte woman was very persistent--L stood inside the pink, personalized bathroom that Light had claimed for himself. The shower curtains were blue with neon colored fish on it, swimming behind seaweed. The walls were decorated with starfish stickers. And if one couldn't figure out that this bathroom was Light's, the yellow rubber ducky dressed up as a sailor for bath time fun was a big hint. Note the word bath time. L, who was standing on a pink, fluffy carpet facing the mirror, looked at the bath tub. When was the last time he took one?

"Now is not the time to ponder about the last time I bathed myself," said L. He opened up the cabinet and started looking through the many bottles of medicine. "My, I had no idea that Light-kun had so many pills!" He took out five full bottles of Advil and placed them down by the sink, examining them. "Pill popping can cause one to experience a high level of hormones and delirium. If Light-kun took all of these, his testosterone level would be dangerously high and he would be stuck in a world of insanity. It would explain the way he acts all the time." He shook one of the bottles. "Eighty percent chance of Light-kun being Kira."

Finally, L found what he was looking for. He pulled out one of Light's bottles of cold medicine. Taking it into the living room, he sat down on the couch next to the laptop. He took the cap off of the bottle and poured all of it onto the keyboard. The pink liquid stained the buttons. L twisted the cap back on and placed it on the table. He watched the laptop carefully.

"It should be cured by now," said L. "Let's see if it will turn on."

He lightly poked the power button. Nothing happened, except his finger now being stuck to the button. He tried to pull if off, but he couldn't. The medicine made the entire computer sticky. He put his other hand on the keyboard and with some force, pulled his finger off the power button. But in doing so, he just realized that he was not free; now his hand was stuck.

"This laptop is quite the problem," growled L. He got down on his knees and looked at its screen, putting his thumb back up to his lip. "I detest you."

"It's a piece of cake to bake a pretty cake, if the way is hazy! You gotta do the cooking by the book. You know you can't be lazy…"

With his free hand, L took his cell phone out from his pocket. Flipping it open with a grunt, he answered it.

"What can I do for you, Mello?...No, I can't really talk right now, I'm in a little predicament…So you're here in Japan. Good for you, you didn't get yourself lost…You're coming here? When can I expect you?...You're right outside my door…"

"Yeah, so get your ass over here and open it up!"

L closed his cell phone. "I can't do that right now, Mello."

"Fine then! I'll let myself in!"

The locked door burst open with a kick from a black, steel toed boot. And in came Mello, his shoulder length blonde hair resting on a black, leather jacket, unbuttoned, showing a red tang top. He also had tight, black jeans with red chains attached to them. He took off his jacket and tossed it on to the floor. L put a pillow over the laptop to try and cover it up.

"So, L, what kind of predicament are you in?" asked Mellow, as he walked over to the couch, his hands on his hips.

"I'd rather not say, so just stay right there!"

Mello froze with his leg up in the air. He smiled.

"Wow, L doesn't want me to go near him. Must be personal."

And just at that very moment, the pillow slid off the laptop. Mello leaned forward, balancing quite well on his one leg.

"Oh, it's a laptop," said Mello. "You looking up Kira information for me? You know that I'm really the only one to help you with this case. Near's too stupid, and Light's way below him on the IQ chart!"

"I was looking up Kira information, but then I ceased," said L. He scooted across the couch, bringing the laptop with him.

Mello put his leg down and walked over to L, who was glaring at him for disobeying an order. He glanced at the screen and laughed.

"Oh, you were just about to turn it on!" he said with a smile. "Here, let me do that for you, since I am your apprentice!"

He pressed the power button and saw that nothing happened. But when he tried to pull his finger off, he couldn't. He frowned and gritted his teeth, yanking.

"What the hell is going on here?!" yelled Mello. He glared at L, who was still glaring at him. "What's up with this thing, L?!"

"That's the very reason why I didn't get the door," replied L, who stopped glaring and looked at the keyboard. "It seems that the medicine caused the laptop to be sticky."

"Why did you pour medicine on the laptop?!"

"Because it came down with a virus and has been silent ever since. I thought giving it medicine would cure it."

"L, you're so stupid! We've got to get ourselves unstuck from this thing!"

Suddenly, Mello stood up, picking up half the laptop with him. He yanked on L's arm and brought him to his feet. He dragged the detective down the hall, into Light's bathroom. L stumbled in as Mello closed the door behind him. Mello spun around and walked over to the tub, turning the water on. Then, looking at L, he tugged at his arm.

"Take you clothes off!" yelled Mello.

L put his thumb to his mouth. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me!" said Mello, as he started undoing his pants. "We have to get into the bath so that the laptop won't be sticky anymore!"

L watched as Mello undressed himself completely. He had tossed his boots and socks on to the sink and had taken his pants and boxers off in no time flat. His shirt, however, was hanging on his arm. Now he was looking at L, tapping his foot.

"Well?" said Mello. "Are you going to do it or not?"

"This seems highly dangerous," said L. Mello groaned. "Don't you groan at me. You know I'm right. We could get electrocuted if we brought the computer into the water with us." And he pointed at his shirt. "And I'd rather not get my shirt wet, since there is no way to take our shirts off. It's not time for it to get washed yet."

Mello sighed, putting his hand up to his forehead. He shoved his hair back. Suddenly, he lunged at L, pinning him to the wall with his one hand. The laptop hit one of the starfish stickers with a loud 'thud'. He slid his hand down and started undoing L's pants.

"Do you want to be stuck to that thing for the rest of your life?"

"No, that would be rather uncomfortable."

"THEN TAKE THOSE CLOTHES OFF RIGHT NOW!

"May I ask what is going on in here?"

L and Mello turned to see that someone was standing in the doorway. A young boy, wearing a pair of blue jeans and a white sweatshirt with a yellow shield in the upper right part of his chest, was there holding a blue airplane and wearing a brown hat with floppy doggy ears coming out of it over his curly, white hair. It was Near.

"This is something I do not wish to see. Who ever knew that you two were like this. I somewhat regret not knocking."

So let's see. Mello's naked. He's trying to pull L's pants off. And this poor, innocent boy walks in in the middle of it all. What could possibly be going through his mind right now?

Review, or else you'll be stuck to your computer for the rest of your life!