bScene 2
It Was Miss Scarlet In the Closet!/b
After a long hot shower and the application of plenty of body lotion, Sarah made her way to the living room. Clad now in her polka-dot pajama pants and a tank top, complete with newly secured cotton underwear she curled up on the couch to see what movies were on.
Click went the remote control.
An episode of Sponge Bob Squarepants. A rerun of Star Trek. Some info-commercial about the newest, most amazing kitchen aid gizmo- "And act before midnight, we'll double your order!" Sarah chuckled to herself and murmured, "Yes, act now and I promise to never appear on television again!"
Click. Click. Click.
As she flipped she considered her options for deterring the amount of underwear that was disappearing. At first she entertained the idea of some sort of booby-trap that would snap shut on her room mate's fingers like a mouse trap, or blow a bloom of red dye directly in to her face. She decided though that she wasn't clever enough to achieve such a mechanism. She could just switch up her dresser drawers. After all it was just an odd female tradition that intimates were kept in the top compartment.
Click. Click.
Yes, that seemed like the best solution. Then if in the event that they were still going missing she could confront Brianna.
Click. She found that one of the channels was showing the movie Clue. One of her all time favorite comedies. She began to watch.
At the point where Miss Scarlet found her self with Colonel Mustard in the secret passage, the B-rated suspense building up and several murders having been committed, she heard the noise. It reminded her of a cat; claws extended trying to run along a slick tiled floor, and finding a complete lack of traction. Of course following close on the heels of that thought was the realization that neither her self nor her room mate owned a cat. That thought caused her sit up straight on the couch.
Miss Scarlet and Colonel Mustard had found another dead body. Their screaming and shouting over powered the noise. Sarah debated whether or not to turn the volume up thus diverting her self from the eerie sensation the noise induced, or to turn the volume down in order to further investigate. She held the remote control poised mid-air. She took a deep breath. Get a grip girly, she thought. You've faced worse things than ghost cats. Having turned the volume lower she stood and faced the hallway.
The noise had multiplied. Rats? She wondered. She gulped. For protection she secured an umbrella from the catch-all near the front door. In her heart of hearts she knew she hardly looked threatening: polka-dot pants and a bright blue umbrella didn't exactly scream "Fear me!" But with resolve she walked the length of the small hall and stood outside her bed room door.
Ignoring the small voices that were whispering and the constant tap-tapping, scratching noises, she jumped through her door, drew the umbrella back defensively, and gave out her best Amazon warrior yell. Her threatening shout, turned in to a gasp as she registered what was in the middle of her room. Three goblins stood: one had a tape measure thrown over its shoulder; another wore a dainty pair of spectacles; and the third had one of her brand new pairs of underwear pulled around its body. In shock she let the umbrella tumbled from her hands.
The goblins looked at her.
She looked at the goblins.
Blink, blink went their eyes.
The one wearing the spectacles pulled his head up and cleared his throat. "Good evening miss," he said a tad apprehensive. He nervously clenched and unclenched one of his hands. "And how are we doing this evening?"
"Um," she began. Her arms fell at her sides. "Fine. Thank you."
He smiled a tight awkward grin. "Good."
She blinked again. "What are you doing?"
"Excuse me miss?"
"I said what are you doing? That's my underwear!" She nodded towards the third goblin.
"And what a lovely article of clothing it is!" He turned and adjusted the material around the goblin's shoulders.
"Have you, you goblins, been stealing my underwear?"
"Stealing?" gasped the one with the tape measure. "Hardly!"
"No, no miss," said the first apologetically. "Selling them, not stealing them. Your underwear is a hot fashion item for goblin attire."
She had been prepared for a mutant cat, or even a burglar. Heck, she had even considered the possibility that her room mate, desperate for a fix, had snuck back in to steal another pair. But this; this she had not been prepared for.
"My underwear…is a fashion item?" she asked stunned.
"A hot fashion item," he corrected poignantly. "They make for darling vests."
Sure enough the goblin who was currently modeling her knickers had his arms through the legs holes with the crotch running along his back. Thus situated the underwear fell like a robe or vest.
"Well, you know, see here," she stumbled for words. She huffed. "You could have at least asked for my permission!" The moment she said the words, she felt mildly insane. The three looked sheepishly at her.
"Do you wish us to return them?" he offered.
"Er, no, that won't be necessary." The thought rather disgusted her. She began to reason with her self: the blue fabric was rather complimentary on the goblin in question, and she was rather relieved to learn that her room mate was not some warped, kinky pervert. "Just," she paused trying to mentally catch up to the reality of the situation. "Just ask next time."
The three exchanged glances.
"Won't be a problem."
"Sure."
"Absolutely."
With a few more exchanged pleasantries the three goblins made for her closet door, waved goodbye, and vanished. Sarah scratched the back of her head. Goblins? No, she most certainly hadn't been prepared for that!