FIC Grey Dawn, Part Two - Remember
Beloved, Grey Dawn Remix - VNV Nation
My beloved do you know
When the warm wind comes again
Another year will start to pass
And please don't ask me why I'm here
Something deeper brought me
That I need to remember
Fic written for a prompt from Vernajast and because I needed something to fulfill my angst quotient. Semi-AU, post-Kyuubi where Minato didn't die. Kakashi is 17ish. Overall rating M.
Thanks to Ofuda for the beta and meta :)
It hadn't taken much to jog their memories or to recall seemingly unrelated things to mind. Scattered remnants, tattered reminiscences were tossed over a shoulder or into the air ahead. Surprisingly, though, Kakashi had offered the first remembrance, at a spring-fed pool surrounded by boulders. Minato was lying on his back, staring up at the clouds as Kakashi washed and refilled his canteen. He had brought back two shiny, ink-dark pebbles, one for them both. "Like Obito's eyes... before." He shrugged and carefully placed one into the hand of the man who had been his sensei for so long. The cold, damp, still ungloved hand lingered a too-short moment. Minato stared at the stone, then at Kakashi, only able to nod, and quietly placed the small rock into a pocket before they set out again.
A large patch of mushrooms prompted Minato to share a memory of Rin's healing jutsus, not because the mushrooms were of any medicinal value, but because she had dearly loved eating them, and healing was such a part of her. They talked about healing jutsus for a short while, also trading stories of significant injuries from the times they'd been apart. Minato's were older. As Hokage, there weren't often many opportunities for injury, and Kakashi's weren't exactly unknown to him; Minato received copies of all injury reports for his shinobi. Still, this was the first time they'd shared the tales.
Once again, Kakashi surprised Minato, solemnly admitting he still carried the small medical pack she had gifted him with on his appointment to jounin. Neither mentioned Obito's gift. It wasn't necessary, and it was unlikely either would ever forget, especially not when there were already those calling him Sharingan no Kakashi. He wasn't sure he wanted to know if Kakashi carried the kunai with him, as well. The sky began to grow dark, and Minato grew silent. He pressed Kakashi to go faster, although he knew it was impossible to outrun remembrance.
Minato leapt from branch to branch following Kakashi, never slowing, never hesitating, despite the rapidly failing light. Limbs showed black against the purpling sky, still blushing rose and peach and gold to the west. They were both quiet now, this close to their destination. It wasn't precisely the synchronous bonding they'd shared once in a distant past, but each apart had grown in ways to compensate for it.
They finally slowed a short time later, as they saw the flickering glow ahead in the darkness. They could make out the boundaries of the estate as they drew nearer. Kakashi led them around, circling, scouting, checking the layout, gauging the security of the place. Minato nodded, satisfied everything was as specified in the mission scroll. They settled into a tree to watch, waiting for them to settle in for the night. After a glance at Kakashi, letting him know his intentions, Minato settled into a light trance state, meditating, resting, and focusing his chakra for the upcoming night's work.
Minato came to full awareness slowly; Kakashi was leaning close, a gloved hand resting lightly on his right shoulder, signifying safe waking. A quick glance at the twinkling stars confirmed the time lapse. Most of the earlier lights were extinguished or dimmed. He stretched his muscles, one at a time, cracking his neck to rid himself of a particularly stubborn kink. The noise was loud in the night; the all pervasive drone of frogs and summer insects was long gone, but the deep, cushioned silence of winter and the first snows were at most a month away. Small creatures moved through the branches of the trees, the leaves on the forest floor. Minato never quite felt at ease in the late autumn forest. It felt too much in between, held too many memories, too lightly veiled the signs of nature's impending sleep.
He smiled wryly to himself when Kakashi turned his back as Minato quickly stripped and changed into a dark kimono, hakama, and haori. He leaned against the trunk of the tree and donned matching tabi and zori. Kakashi remained in his ANBU gear. His appearance was of no special importance, because none who saw him tonight would live to tell of shinobi shadows. Minato channeled a quick burst of chakra and activated the special hiraishin tag on a kunai and passed it to Kakashi, who strapped it to a sheath on his forearm. He knew Kakashi was remembering another tagged kunai, another mission, just as he was. It was unavoidable. But there were no Iwa nin here, no bridge to be destroyed, no team of children that would be sent to be broken during time of war. Just a lone ANBU sent to wreak havoc and ensure he returned safely, mission complete.
Once Kakashi threw the kunai, Minato's part in the mission was done, and he would have mere minutes to escape. Timing was doubly, even triply critical with Minato visible and dressed as a civilian. Whether Kakashi threw the blade with the objective complete or compromised would remain to be seen and Minato tried not to think about leaving Kakashi alone and overrun by enemies. He supposed it was inevitable, working with Kakashi again after all these years, that memories just wouldn't stay buried. He would have to make the decision Sakumo couldn't all those years ago, and leave his team behind, or more than the mission would fail. He was Hokage now, couldn't be recognized, captured, killed. It would weaken the village, risk war. He forcibly stopped that train of thought. It would only undo all the calm he'd tried to bolster himself with earlier. But he silently damned the council for their incessant messages and mind games. Even here on a mission he couldn't escape reminders of them.
They readied their two small packs and placed them deep within the branches of a thicket of dense-growing pines, setting chakra tags to destroy all evidence if they didn't return by dawn. The final preparations before they set out were completed soundlessly. It wasn't stiff-necked silence from Kakashi or worried caution from Minato, though. They'd never needed words to express themselves to each other. This was something they'd done so many times over the years that verbal communication wasn't necessary, would only get in the way and slow them down. There were no words, but there were speaking glances.
The porcelain dog mask was tugged up and to the side until they left to complete the main objective of the mission, and blue eyes slid across moon pale skin, seeing the young man his student had grown into, telling him how proud he was, letting him know how happy he was to be with him again for even a short time. The single storm-dark eye relented in some of its customary reserve, letting the other know he had missed him as much, but also informing that he knew his duty, that he knew this was the only way they could share what they'd had, he would never trespass beyond what was expected of a shinobi, an ANBU of the Hidden Leaf to the Hokage. Gazes led to small touches, intense brushes of hand against shoulder, shoulder against chest, arm clasped in arm. They straightened armor and clothing and gazed, drinking in the sight of each other, both indulging in this stolen contact for a few brief moments.
There were overtones now that had not been there, before, intimations of satisfying heat and pleasurable darkness, gratifying desperation and thundering release. Minato shuddered, not even realizing what he was letting trickle through to Kakashi, almost daring to imagine the unbidden images came from his former student. Stuff of fantasy and black, sleepless nights when he couldn't ignore the ache anymore and finally fell asleep just before dawn, sweating, panting, exhausted, his body sated but his mind unfulfilled and guilty. Dream nights when they were no longer sensei and student, just two friends, lovers, partners in every sense of the word. Despite, or maybe because of it, maybe only due to passing time, then, as always, Kakashi pulled the mask into place and made himself go as cold and aloof as possible, pushing away, withdrawing, lest Minato's feelings and anxieties get the better of him and ravage the unaffected, emotionless mindset battle required of them both.
Minato took a deep breath, reaching for his previous calm, stilling his thoughts, cursing himself for getting carried away twice in such a short period of time. This is a mission, baka, a mission with Kakashi. Act like you're the teacher and not a second year student. He tried to ignore the fact that it was because it was Kakashi that he was losing control. He didn't like to admit that, even to himself.
He forced himself through a series of quick mental exercises, and when he felt he had sufficient control over himself, he looked up at Kakashi, and couldn't help sharing the feral grin, the just short of manic gleam he knew was in the now-veiled eyes. They'd never truly forgotten this, the loved/hated thrill, the repugnant yet enticing sensuality of the hunt. They'd share this beyond the day either died. The rush and the thrill of the mission, despite the bitter, vile, unspoken things they sometimes did. The ease of long association came back without thought or conscious direction. They were ready. Two shinobi of Konoha nodded as one and faded into shadow, springing into the quiet night.