Author's note: I'm really sorry for not posting for so long. I've been rather busy lately. But… Here's the next chapter! This chapter reveals some snippets of the past when Kira's symptoms started. And something bad happens to Kira at the hospital... On with the next chapter... (Paragraphs in Italic are snippets of the past and memories)

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed or Gundam Seed Destiny and the characters...

The room felt so cold... so silent... so dark...

I lay on the smooth sheets of the bed, curled on my side, eyes closed, cheeks wet from tears.

I wondered if Cagalli was crying too. I had been rather harsh... I hadn't minced my words, hadn't used a gentler resolve to tell her that I was planning to end her brother's life, as easily as extinguishing a quivering flame of a candle...

She must hate me...

I opened my blue-gray eyes slowly, feeling the wet tears on my cheeks. My heart skipped a beat as my gaze fell on the burnished photo frame set on the surface of the dresser... the one we had chosen together... to edge the photograph of him and me... of us…

The last photograph we had taken before he... before his genes began to mutate...

"Lacus? Have you seen Kira?" Cagalli said, as she thrust a stack of papers to the side, "He seems rather sick. Has he contracted a cold or something? It's so unlike him, what with his enhanced genes and all... But I dismissed him and made him return to the Orb Mansion to rest, giving Kisaka the responsibility to make sure he went back..."

I shrugged, shutting the computer as I massaged my temples. "I asked Kira if he was alright. He said he was... Does Athrun know anything?" I asked, peering at Cagalli through weary, blood-shot eyes. "No, I talked to Athrun. We're all too busy that I'm afraid we've neglected Kira. You and I should perhaps set aside our countries for a minute to take Kira to the doctor... And Athrun, Shinn, Luna and the other guys should put aside their duties for a while to find out what is wrong with our General!" She frowned thoughtfully as she returned to her work...

If only, Kira, if only we had set aside our duties for a while, just a while… to care for you... This would never have happened… I'm so sorry, Kira…

I reached out slowly to the photo frame and took it down, bringing it into an embrace, wrapping my arms around it protectively… as the tears slid down my cheeks again… Painful regret seared through my heart, like a million cuts ripped open and scoured with burning tears.

"Kira?" I muttered, concerned, holding his forearm to steady him as he staggered unsteadily, "Are you alright?"

He groaned softly but nodded, "Yeah... Just tired. Don't worry," He placed a hand reassuringly on mine before smiling weakly, "Go ahead... Everyone's hungry. I'll be right out with the tray..."

I nodded uncertainly and guided his hand to the countertop, directing him to his support. Picking up the tray again, I cast him a worried glance before leaving the kitchen...

If only I had stayed to hold you… If only I had looked at you one more time and noticed the battle you were struggling to win inside…

Shrill clattering tore through the delighted chattering in the dining room, leaving the room in stunned silence. I whipped my head around and stared at the kitchen, startled by the interruption. A sudden, shocking thought burst through my mind... Kira!

I dropped the tray on the table and hurtled across the room, crashing through the kitchen door and skidding to a halt several feet away from the still body of Kira, lying on the cold floor of the kitchen. The tray of plates lay shattered beside him...

"Kira!" I cried, dropping to my knees by his side. I cradled his head, stroking his pale face, pleading, "Wake up, Kira!" His eyes were closed, his face a deathly white, sweat slicking down his features.

Athrun, Cagalli and the others tore into the kitchen and Athrun dropped down by Kira, reaching for his wrist. I watched frantically as he felt for a pulse and my world froze when he pointed towards the hall and yelled, "Call the hospital! Kira doesn't have a pulse!"

I curled into myself, hugging the photo frame, crying freely from the anguish that tore through me, eating me alive…

We ran down the bleak corridors, trying to catch up with the nurses dashing towards the emergency room, driving forward the gurney Kira lay on as they trundled down the hallway. Thundering footsteps pounded behind me as we neared the emergency room and I watched in exasperation as they tore through the doorway. A nurse left the troop surrounding Kira and pushed us back as we tried to head through the door. Someone grabbed my hand and hauled me to the glass window overlooking the emergency room and I watched through the glass, wringing my fingers in anxiety, hardly feeling the gentle hand placed on my shoulder. The turquoise-haired doctor was issuing orders, her lips moving quickly as she bent over Kira. She glanced up hurriedly when a nurse yelled at the declining line on the cardiac monitor. My heart stopped… It couldn't be…I wasn't aware of who was pulling me away from the window, but I fought hard against my bonder as she dragged me away, whispering, "The doctor needs to revive the patient, please wait outside…"

I slowly uncurled from the stiff ball I had rolled into… keeping a firm hold on the photo frame… tears wet and sticky on my cheeks… as the painful memories sought my mind again. They haunted me, night after night, in sleep, in dreams, in nightmares…

Tears welled in my eyes again but I forced them back. It was late… and I was tired from all the crying... Gently, affectionately, I set the photo frame back in its place and lay down on the chilly bed silently… closing my eyes… letting the image of Kira hover in my mind before I slipped of into a fitful sleep...

§ ♥ §

Repeated beeping tore me from my sleep. I raised my head from my pillow and stared at the monitor by my bed with half-lidded eyes. The stubborn red light blinked continuously as I stretched over and pushed the button.

The features of Yzak flashed up on the screen. "Chairlady," He greeted as he saluted formally. I glanced briefly at the Orb logo above him and realized that he was in the Orb office Cagalli had assigned to him, the office in which he used when he came down to Orb to provide me with updates of PLANT.

How long had I not returned to PLANT? It must have been an awfully long time...

"Yzak? Commander Joule?" I muttered, rubbing an eye sleepily.

"I'm sorry to wake you up at this time, Chairlady..." He apologized. I noted a raging concern in his voice and I raised my head to stare at him. Yzak Joule was a hot-headed man; his concern could only mean issues of the utmost importance...

"Commander Elsman and I noticed a message running towards your private phone system and we rushed to the office and had it checked out. It is safe for you to receive..." His voice dropped to an anxious whisper, "It's from the hospital... It's something about... Kira..."

I stared at him, wide-eyed, my voice trapped in my throat. "Patch it in!" I gasped. He nodded and I watched in apprehension as his features vaporized in a storm of static before the familiar features of Doctor Chloe took over the screen, her turquoise hair ruffled.

"Miss Lacus? Chairlady? It's me, Chloe. I'm tremendously sorry to wake you at this hour..." She spoke quickly, her voice laced with uneasiness, "Kira's in danger... It seems that his genes have started mutating again. You should gather Mr. and Mrs. Yamato, Mr. and Mrs. Zala and the others and arrive in the hospital as soon as you can..."

She reached out to the switch of the communicator. "Wait," I muttered, too shocked to cry, "Chloe, please do everything you can to save Kira. I... I can't let him leave like that..."

She glanced at me, eyes glistening with tears. "I've been his doctor for six years and I'm not about to let anything bad happen to him..." She smiled reassuringly before her features disappeared and was replaced by Yzak's.

He watched as I left the bed and tugged on a robe hurriedly. "Join us at the hospital if you want, Yzak... Get Dearka too if he's with you..."

"We'll be there as soon as we can..." He replied and very softly, "Kira Yamato is a tough kid. He'll make it..." His features dissolved.

I dashed out of the room and headed towards the closed door of Cagalli and Athrun's bedroom.

I pounded on their door, waking them as loudly as I could. Athrun's tired face appeared at the door with Cagalli grumbling behind him. After my rushed explanation, they were wide awake and I ran down the corridor, banging on doors and yelling, not bothering that I was waking the entire household.

In a mere ten minutes, we were rushing out the door in all states of undress. Kisaka had started the limo and Athrun, his red sedan. We squeezed ourselves into the seats hurriedly and Shinn hauled himself on to his motorbike. The vehicles roared alive and whisked out of the garage, soaring down the road, leaving Mana and the rest of the household standing worriedly at the door.

Silently, I muttered a fearful prayer...

I failed once in protecting you, Kira... But I'll never fail again... I'll protect you and the many memories I hold in my heart...

§ ♥ §

Author's note: And that's the end of the 4th chapter. How did you find it? Please review and let me know. Reviews are great inspirations to me so please, please review... You may criticize me too... (I know this chapter somehow isn't as good as the previous ones)