I am so sorry it took so long to get up. I have just started uni and my life has been a bit of a whirlwind and when I got here I got awful writers block...but I'm over that now I hope so I am planning to get the chapters up sooner. This one is for luv2Luv-hugh for many reasons, number

1. She pushed me to get this chap done, constantly referring to it so I kept returning until I got passed the block. Thank you!!

2. She's just had some really bad news so I wanted to give her something to make her happy! hugs

3. And finally she makes me smile and helps me when I'm low and that means a lot so thank you my little ditzy!

Keep smiling!

I agree the policeman is a bit harsh but please give me a bit a writer's licence and the reason for the policeman's attitude will become apparent later on.

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Please review I need to know that my readers are still with me after such a long spell of no news chaps. Also I need cheering up uni is hard and I'm getting low so please give me reviews…they're my happy pills!!!

Reviewers

Simbagirl: Thank you

DancingdivaXX: it gets worse but don't worry there will be a happy Houddy ending I promise!!

Samanthaon: Thank you, I like writing that kind of thing but there it is easier to use in angst than in comedy like gsm. I'm having fun trying something new!!

Kris the fanficaholic: I'm pleased you like it! I wasn't sure how it would be received but so far so good!!

HouseAddiction: lol it's meant to be sad so I'm pleased it was! Thank you for saying it was amazing. It has given me a big grin!!!

Classiqfemme: thank you!! I like the way you described it horrifying and beautiful kind of sums up what I was aiming for, and I intend to write much more!!

House's phoenix: thank you! Wow I made you cry...can't decided whether I'm happy about that or not lol. I'm pleased it had that affect on you but not pleased that I caused you to cry.

Swiglo3000: That's what I was aiming for, graphic scenes are bit too harsh and no one likes to read them so I thought I would work more with the emotional impact than the physical after all that is what does the most damage.

Prinnie: tried to make uni be dammed but it kind of doesn't work lol. Pleased you thought the last chap was awesome hope you think the same of this too.

Chromo26: lol don't worry, later is better than never. I thought it would be interesting too because rather than have it happen to a weak woman (which cam is) It's happened to the strongest of the women in the show and I wanted to see what happened… I'm pleased you think its going well so far.

Luv2luv-Hugh: nope not before uni sorry!! But here is a new chapter, it will get sadder as you already know but there will be a very happy ending!!

Eleanor J: Thank you, I like working with House and watching him trying to over come his weaknesses, its what makes the character interesting too me…along with many other things!

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Actions speak louder:

She was warm, curled up, limbs wrapped round him, her head rising and falling in time with his breathing as she laid on his chest, he was asleep, she wasn't.

She had woken moments ago from a disturbed slumber, tossing and turning in the night, harsh visions plaguing her dreams, taunting her, playing extracts over and over again and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't hide. The pain was still present in the dark, eyes shutting out the light but not the feel, the sound, the aches still flooding through her. She was a prisoner within the walls of her own mind and only time was her healer and may not ever truly set her free.

She had jumped when her eyes flickered open, whirling round the unfamiliar surroundings, ears alert to the breathing pattern that was not her own. Her eyes had fallen on the figure beside her, face untroubled, expression blank as he held her close, free from the worries of the world, his skin smoother than ever before, his aura usually so harsh and sorrowful was calm and carefree, the rhythm of his breaths washing over her, calming her senses, forcing away the fleeting thought of fleeing his hold, deserting the warmth emanating from his skin. Her limbs remained tangled with his own, her body a tight ball as she snuggled up against him, enclosed in the safe surroundings of his arms.

She remembered the first few seconds when she awoke, memories absent, happiness flooding through her when she realised it was House who held her but it was drowned out too soon, washed away as the poison returned, weights dragging her beneath the surface, dark water of despair rushing up to meet her.

She had focused on him, his feel, his touch, a stark contrast to what she'd been exposed to, people who seemed harsh could be beautiful, kind and caring when it truly mattered and that was what kept her going, him, he held her head above the water.

She was lying there with just the briefest flicker of hope that he would pull her through, it was more powerful than she could ever have imagined and he meant more to her now than ever before. She could see him for what he truly was, a man trapped in a monster, damaged on the outside, un-whole and hurting, a lost soul unable to find its way.

She'd been didn't understand before, he was lost in the cloud that consumed him, her on the outside unable to see in, now they had met in the mist, they could work there way out together, keeping each other company as they found their way forward, battered and bruised but together, friends, helping each other over the boulder blocking their path to happiness, but one step at a time, a steady pace, she was prepared to fall, but knowing House would be there to pull her to her feet made her feel safe, and that was enough for now.

……………………………..

He could feel her, calm and relaxed, breathing in time with him, lying over his chest, curled into his side, his arms wrapped round her. He didn't want to move, too content with comforting her for him to be comfortable with himself. Harsh House was melting, an ice burg dripping, cold streams washing away his angry exterior, her heat slowly dissolving the cold barriers he'd built up around himself. He couldn't console her, unable to help, too awkward for words, too cold for kindness; however she was safe, she was with him, in his arms, and if he couldn't comfort with words his actions could, would, show that he cared.

He cracked one eye open, watching her, lost in thought, eyes staring at a point he was unable to see, off in the dark distant world of her memories. She was still hurting, the expression of pain swimming in the crystal blue his only wish was to wash it away.

He lifted his hand allowing his fingers to brush over the top of her head in the lightest of touches, she jumped, his contact was unexpected but not unwanted she settled her head back down allowing his fingers to flow over her hair with more force, running his fingertips to tangle in the dark strands, comforting and calming he was there for her and she knew it.

'You ok?' he hated asking that question, it was stupid, false; of course she wasn't ok, how could she be? OK!…what a useless word, small, pointless and pathetic with no meaning or substance, what was ok? Happy, sad, content, calm, it could describe a number of things and yet didn't seem to be anything at all, no purpose, just a word, two letters glued together to express all or nothing, fill a gap in a clichéd statement that everyone asked when they were unsure, uncertain or uncaring, he cared, but he never had a way with words, and the words in which he employed were always devoid of expression or feeling, his emotions long since buried under layers of despair.

He was experiencing contrasting feelings based on the way in which Cuddy was currently burrowing beneath them, holes were forming in his defence and she would find her way through; but, if he was honest, he wanted her too. Their friendship had suffered much to his own distress, the walls had crumbled around him, him beating them down with his new wooden weapon of destruction and Cuddy hadn't been able to fight. He regretted it, now he wanted to join both their defences; build them back up again together, if anyone wanted to hurt her again they would have to get through him first, that was the way it had been and the way he had always wanted it to be.

But Cuddy, strong and independent had fought the world alone, and lost. Now though, she had come running to him cowering behind his own weak walls as her last form of protection from the outside world. So for as long as it lasted he would allow himself to bathe in the brief ray of happiness that descended over him when she was curled in his arms, allowing him to protect her, no matter how tainted the circumstances, for now she was his and he was hers.

He watch her think for a moment, thoughts flickering over her face as she truly assessed how she was, was she ok?, a light nod, for now she was as content as she could possibly be. That was all about to change.

House's eyes squeeze tight shut as he built up the courage to address the issue that was fast approaching, he wanted to ignore it, pretend it didn't need to happen but it had too. He had to take the moment and smash straight through.

'Cuddy?'

'Mmmm' her eyes were closed, eyelids covering the wells of expression, he loved watching her at peace and hated having to disturb it.

'You have to make you statement today, you know that don't you?'

Her eyes snapped open, cold, unblinking; wide awake, the peace and calm long since gone, a harsh mist settling in. She remained silent.

'You have to do it, he needs to be caught, 'he felt her muscles tense, curling her frame tighter ignoring the reference to the thing who had hurt her being human, 'I'll be with you every step of the way'.

Her eyes lifted looking into his own, he watch the battle taking place, she didn't want to go, yet she knew she had too, wishing to ignore it and hide or face it and fight. He kept the eye contact, giving her arm a quick squeeze, 'come on cuddles we can do this together.'

Her lips twitched ever so slightly, her muscles loosing beneath his fingertips, she nodded, 'Ok, I'll do it, you'll be there, promise,' pleading, her tone quiet and desperate, eyes wide and innocent. A tight pain in his chest as her expression tugged at his heart strings, he didn't want her to do it, he wanted to protect her and here he was forcing her to face her fears, what twisted logic was that? But it had to be done and there was no way he would leave her side for one moment in fear she would fall. 'Yeah,' he smiled placing a quick, light, caring kiss on her forehead, 'you're stuck with me now.'

A light harsh laugh broke from her lips, 'yeah right, normally you can't wait to get away.'

House frowned surely she didn't expect him to abandon her now, not after what had happened, a little bit of TLC and then goodbye thanks for the visit. She really had a tainted opinion of him, before he would have thrived in the negative view so clearly reflected in her eyes, however, recently, now more so than ever; it disgusted him that she could ever think that.

He didn't know why he should feel that way, he wasn't experiencing any regret of his behaviour around any other surrounding parties, they viewed him as a cold harsh bastard and he liked it, less trouble.

Cuddy on the other hand, in her new state of vulnerability, was disturbing him and he was unsure as to how or why she was, but he was determined to find out. He felt her frame lift from his own, her hands splaying over his chest as she rose, the cold air rushing in, she made motions to move but as she lifted her hands from his chest House's hands wrapped around her wrist holding them in place, the action was involuntarily stemmed by confusion and desperation to begin patching up her opinion of him. 'I'm not a harsh bastard all the time.'

Her head twitched, regarding him thoughtfully, addressing his words trying to attain the tone and why that particular sentence escaped from his lips, 'yeah, just 99.9 of the time.'

She went to move again, but his hands held her fast, 'no, not this time, I want to help, I'm hear for you, you know that right? And I meant it when I said you're not getting rid of me, I'm in this for the long hall no matter how much you drive me insane.'

Her eyes widen, jaw dropping, incredulous, 'Me! Annoy you?' A rare smile broke over her face, eyes wrinkling as her hand broke free slapping him on the side of the arm,

House grimaced, face screwing up in mock pain, 'that's not very nice, I'm trying to help and you're mean to me.'

Her laugh was breathless, head falling back in mock prayer, 'oh House,' she brought her head back down to face him, a small smile still playing at her lips, head shaking as the little bubble of laughter that broke free died down, 'thank you.'

His brow furrowed once more, 'what for?'

'For being you, for being here, you'll never know how much that means to me.' Her palm caressed the side of his cheek, 'so thank you.' She rose from the bed and wandered from the room, the bathroom door closing with a snap.

House watched, whisper brushing against her retreating back as she vanished behind the door, 'I think I already do.'

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He listened to the shower, the rumble filling the silence as he laid there lost in thought, his skin still tingling from her touch. His brow furrowed in concentration, what was going on, he had come alive again, while working on Cuddy's rapidly dieing flame, the sparks had accidentally lit his own.

He thought it had died long ago but Cuddy was making it burn bright. She was his friend and yet his body was telling him he wanted more. He was obviously confused, unknown emotions of compassion and care crashing over him was getting muddled and masquerading as something else.

She was Cuddy he was House they hated each other; that Great Wall of China keeping them apart, normally, and yet he wanted that to change or did he? She was his friend, however distant and twisted a friendship it may be, it was still there and had lasted by the skin of its teeth for years; did he really want to change that? No, emotions, feelings, unwanted and unneeded, he was willing to help, but unwilling to change and that was the way it was going to be, but she thanked him for it, being his usual harsh and blunt self and that was what confused him the most.

He rolled out of bed, downing a pill to lessen the pain and scrambled into the Kitchen.

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Breakfast was a quick encounter. Cuddy, clean and fresh from the shower, barely ate anything, the fear of the statement looming over her like a big black shadow blocking out the light, leaving her to linger in the shadows of her pain.

House on the other hand was struggling to create conversation, not good at small talk, preferring to remain silent, washing down toast with badly made coffee and staggering from the room to get dressed.

He limped down the hall, the pain in his leg hadn't lessened, his fingers massaging at the mutated muscle as he made his way into his bedroom. Her scent still lingered, the silence around him deafening. He pulled random loose fitting clothes on and returned to the lounge to find her sat, back stiff, un-relaxed, on his sofa. The calm which had descended that morning had been well and truly whipped away and he was the one who'd done it. He would never change, and she would hate him for it, causing her more pain, it was un-required, she didn't need to fight, he didn't want her too and the only comfort of this pain was the fact that she could never hate him more than he already hated himself. That emotion drowned out any conflicting emotions he had been experiencing before. The moment had gone and so had his feelings, he was back, no longer lost.

'Come on Cuddy, let's go.'

She rose without a word, head facing the floor, defeated; his hand went to rest in the small of her back as he gently nudged her forward, supporting her, keeping her moving.

The door closed behind them, the loud snap echoing out in the silence.

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The ride to the station was silent; Cuddy was gazing out the window, lost in thought as she watched the world whip past. They pulled up outside and sat in silence for a few moments both wandering in their own minds, both unwilling to speak before the other, House took the plunge, 'you ready?'

'No,' her voice was weak, its strength had drained, the prospect of having to relive the worse night of her life was slowly soaking the spark back out of her, and House wasn't looking forward to hearing it either.

He reached over and grasped her hand giving it a light squeeze, Cuddy's eyes focused on the gesture; comfort was so alien from House that, that brief touch had more impact than a big prep speech from anyone else. She felt the strength flood from his fingers into her; his heat spreading into her hand; she could face anything with him by her side. 'Ok' she nodded 'let's do it.'

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They had been seated in a question room, four blank walls surrounding them, a police officer seated over the table, pen and paper at the ready. Cuddy had fought for House to be present; the police were reluctant but allowed it when Cuddy refused to relive anything without House there to help her along the way.

She was shaking, the story spouting from her lips harsh and disjointed. 'I was walking through the park.'

'What time?' the police officer was quite harsh, tone accusing, as though Cuddy was the criminal. House didn't like it one bit.

'Huh?' she was confused, losing her flow, the officer was forcing Cuddy to have to find her place over and over again, dragging up more images just so she could start from where she left off.

'What time where you in the park?'

'Um, I don't know, just gone midnight.'

'Why were you in the park at that time?'

'Um…because I had just left the bar and was walking across the park to visit House….Greg.'

'Don't you know it is dangerous to walk through parks late at night, especially a woman on her own?'

House felt the anger bubble over, the young jumped up officer's smug tone rubbing him the wrong way. 'Well of course she knows it's dangerous, she got raped didn't she.' He saw Cuddy flinch in the corner of his eye.

The policeman's eyes swivelled to regard him, 'excuse me sir.'

'Dr,' House's tone was forceful, fed up of this jerk sitting across the way. This was hard enough without stupid prats like him making pointless comments.

'Excuse me 'DR' but I am currently interviewing miss:-'

'Dr,' House's eyebrows raised, if the guy was going to be a pain in the ass so was he.

'Sorry?' the policeman's brow furrowed confused at the repetition of the title.

'She's a Dr' he twitched his head in Cuddy's direction.

'Oh, sorry,' he clearly wasn't, well I'm am currently interviewing Dr Cuddy and I would wish you to either refrain from commenting or step out of the room. You are ruining the flow of the interview and of course Dr Cuddy must find it distressing to re-tell so your interruptions are making it harder, his smirk tipped House over the edge, he was poised to hit the policeman with his cane when he felt Cuddy's hand rest on his thigh to console him, the gesture done to calm, keep his anger at bay.

She looked at the officer, eyes clear, administrative head back on her shoulders. 'I'm terribly sorry but I feel it would be easier to make my statement to a female officer as you are clearly not that understanding of the situation or turmoil in which I have experienced. So I therefore refuse to continue unless it is to the ears of someone else.'

House could feel her shaking, the last remnant of strength leaking away, he placed his hand over hers lifting it into his palm squeezing it in an effort to allow his strength to flow into her, keep her going for the last final moments.

The policeman eyed them for a few seconds before rising from the chair, 'I am terribly sorry you feel that way. I shall go and get a female officer as you wish, excuse me.' He left the room, Cuddy breathing out as he did so, 'I thought you were going to floor him.'

'I was tempted.'

'Thank you, House but that kind of behaviour doesn't help.' Cuddy wasn't looking at him, her hand sliding from his grasp.

He felt guilty, his aim to help but he had succeeded in making it worse. As usual he poisoned everything around him, 'I'm sorry,' it was quite, barely a whisper but in the silence it rung out in the room. Her eyes snapped to his, a light frown emanating across her forehead at the alien phrase that just left his lips.

'It's ok,' her hand slipped back into his grasp. Her eyes never left face, blue on blue, he could feel the emotions, he thought had vanished with the morning, bubble back up, but he forced them back down, building bigger barriers over the surface; that was one area of his defences he deemed to stay in tack no matter how hard she hammered.

A snap severed their contact, Cuddy's eyes swinging to the door to regard a friendly female policewoman walking into the room. She sat down, regarding the papers before her, 'I'm terribly sorry, are you ready and willing to continue?' She gave a comforting smile, he felt Cuddy relax, gave her hand one more squeeze and she continued.

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It was over moments later; the woman was the complete opposite of her predecessor and allowed Cuddy to continue her statement to the end, asking any relevant questions once Cuddy had finished re-living her nightmare.

Now it was all over, they were standing in the cool air outside the station, the wind whipping her hair from her face. He saw the first tear sparkle in the sunlight as it slid over her cheek. The silent anguish, the relief that the first stepping stone was over and she had made it…just. A tear for exhaustion, for sorrow, they began to fall fast and a light sob broke from her lips.

House stood frozen to the spot, rocking from foot to foot uncertain of what to do. He wanted to help, he didn't know how. He saw passers by regard them, curious as to what was happening, watching the show as a form of entertainment. He didn't want them to see her pain, no one saw Cuddy cry. He pulled her too him, wrapping her in his arms, holding her head to his chest, her tears leaking into his shirt, sobs muffled by his shoulder.

He just stood there, holding her, hiding her anguish from the world; his hands rubbing her back easing the pain out, allowing it to soak deeper into his skin, shouldering her burden, sharing the pain. He felt the sobs die down, her head lifted from his shoulder only to look him in the face, the last lingering tears still sparkling in her eyes, 'thank you.'

She looked so vulnerable, resting in his arms, he resisted the urge to cover her lips with his own, too fast, too soon, they were friends and that's all they would ever be. He sighed, 'Come on lets get you home.'

He saw the fear flood into her eyes, he was confused for a moment before he realised the thought that had entered her head, he smiled, 'my home, not yours,' he released her from his arms, allowing his finger to bump the tip of her nose in a affectionate gesture, 'I've got you now, you aren't escaping anytime soon.'

She smiled, it was sad, but a smile all the same, 'funnily enough House, for once in my life, escaping from you never even crossed my mind.' A little laugh escaped through the last lingering bubbles of sorrow, 'come on,' she pulled him over to the car, 'let's go.'

TBC

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Please review!!! begs