A/N: Hello everyone! I'm so sorry for the delay. I was working on setting up the outline for Virtual Season 9, and I just couldn't find time to write (and someone wanted to know where to find the virtual season, so you can find it at virtualgilmore./). But I want to thank you all so much for your reviews so far. Your support is what is keeping me going!

Also, a special shoutout to Filo and Grizzly, the best betas in all the land! And to the rest of the SCPP for forcing me to write when I did have a little bit of down time. You guys are the best.

Now, on with the show!

Chapter 4: Constant

It started with a proposal.

It crossed her mind that this line had the potential to begin an epic story for the grandchildren, but that would imply that she had thought about having grandchildren with him.

She hadn't. She had never allowed herself to think that far ahead when it came to him.

It wasn't that Luke was such a bad idea. If she sat down to really think about his credentials, she was fairly certain he would rank high. But, there were other things to think about. He was a bit of a loner. He could be grumpy. He was a good friend to her. And, most importantly of all, Rory loved him. That was enough right there to cross him off the list altogether. If there were a way that she could guarantee that Rory wouldn't be hurt, if she could get some sort of assurance that they would be happy, maybe she would consider Luke a possibility. But, for now, she couldn't. She wouldn't. So, she didn't think about it. It was too tempting an offer to dwell on.

It had been an interesting day. Emily was…surprising, to say the least. She bought Rory a bracelet. Which lit up. Which cost less than fifty dollars. So unlike the mother she knew, the woman who wouldn't let her play in her frilly dresses or buy her the denim jacket she just had to have when she was thirteen, because apparently, denim is the root of all evil. What threw Lorelai off the most was the fact that she actually had a good time. She smiled, she laughed. Her mother had even told her a seedy story about one of the DAR ladies while the cashier rang up and wrapped the bracelet. The whole afternoon just didn't compute. She needed stability, something that would bring her out of hectic, bizarro land, and back to the place she knew and loved. And that was why she called Rory and told her to meet her at Luke's. Luke's was a constant.

Things appeared normal when she walked into the diner. The only thing that seemed off was that Rory wasn't already at a table waiting for her. Her brow scrunched in confusion as she considered all the reasons why her normally punctual daughter might be late. Luke was behind the counter, pencil in hand as he jotted down dinery code on a small spiral pad.

"She's not here yet," he stated as he met Lorelai's gaze, adequately interpreting her perplexed expression.

"All right. You'll have to entertain me until she arrives," she quipped as she took a seat at the counter, stashing the tulle monstrosities her mother had insisted on buying on the stool next to her. "Okay, Burger Boy, dance."

She smiled up at him because this was exactly what she needed after her afternoon of department store madness. She needed the smell of coffee in the air and the cozy atmosphere and familiar banter. And, because the banter was familiar, she found comfort in the fact that she could anticipate his response to her comment. She expected the patented Luke Danes eye roll, perhaps a few monosyllabic grunts. Or maybe, if he was feeling especially playful, he would retort with a quip of his own.

"Will you marry me?" he asked, looking up from his notepad nonchalantly, as if what he said wasn't any more important than buying a pair of socks.

She certainly didn't expect that. And it was a big deal.

Her breath caught in her throat, and her jaw went slack, and any attempt to manipulate her mouth to form words was lost in the shock. Had he honestly said what she thought he just said?

He had. She knew she had heard him correctly.

It was just so…odd. And so unlike the Luke she knew, the Luke she expected. The Luke tone was there. The Luke expression never wavered. What the hell had happened when the words came out?

She felt her brain somehow kick back into gear, and when she opened her mouth again, she managed to eke out a, "What?"

But, at the same time, and without her even realizing it at first, she found that she was contemplating it, even though her mind should've been grasping for the most appropriate answer. Then there were the images she suddenly couldn't escape from: movie nights on her lumpy couch. Goodbye kisses with a counter between them. A hand to hold under the table at Friday night dinners. Cold nights warmed by flannel sheets and his embrace. Walking home after town meetings, with Rory in between them, talking animatedly. She could see it. It wasn't perfect, but it seemed…good.

And, just as quickly as they came to her, it suddenly didn't seem like a bad idea to say yes.

Luke shrugged, seemingly gauging her reaction, and said, "Just looking for something to shut you up."

She should've been relieved. She should've been able to laugh it off, and move on to the next subject without another thought. She should've just said yes anyway, just to see how he would react. But, she wasn't able to do any of those things. The images were still there. Him cooking breakfast in her kitchen in sweatpants and socks. Cool evenings on the squeaky front porch swing, her legs in his lap. Late night cram sessions with Rory, notes and textbooks spread all over the living room. She would read off notes about the Canterbury Tales, and he would quiz Rory on the Franco-Prussian War as he replenished their study food and coffee supplies. He wore crooked, brown reading glasses in her mind. She wondered if he really did.

She couldn't focus as she rambled on about Rory's party. She was amazed that she was capable of even speaking. She saw the glasses perched on his nose and she couldn't stop thinking about whether he was the type of guy who wore white socks with gold or red stripes.

Which was why when he told her that she didn't have to ask him to come to Rory's party, she said that she would like him to come. She didn't say that Rory would like it if he came, or it would be nice to see him there. She said she would like it if he came. She. Lorelai. And she could tell from his small smile that he had caught the implication too.

His smile was different and exciting and a little dangerous, and she didn't know what the hell she should be thinking, or whether it was okay that she was thinking anything at all. He was her friend. Those images, the ones now playing on a loop in her head, were not healthy and not conducive to their friendship. She needed to find a way to stop, to somehow purge her thoughts before it changed things. The status quo couldn't change. She needed the status quo. Especially when so many things were changing in her life already.

But, she couldn't stop when he was looking at her like that.

Rory's entrance into the diner was never a more welcome sight.

She dreamed of him that night.

She was hazy on most of the events, and any other person who might have been there was faceless, but she knew he was there. It was that Luke-related certainty that made her sure it was him.

She thought they were at her house, but things were different, as they always were in dreams. But, the place felt like hers, and somehow she knew she belonged to it. She got the distinct impression that she was at Rory's birthday party, and she needed Rory, but she couldn't find her. She wandered from room to room, lost in a sea of confusion, because she knew this was her house, and she knew she should be able to find Rory, but she couldn't. The rooms felt different, and the atmosphere wasn't the same, and she was so flustered that she started to sob.

Luke found her.

She didn't know where he had come from or how he had known she was there, but he appeared out of nowhere, as people often do in dreams, and pulled her into his arms. He held her as she cried, and he kissed her. It wasn't how Luke, her friend, should kiss her, and it wasn't the way she, Luke's friend, should be kissing back. But, she didn't care. He was there, and he had found her, and even though in the back of her mind she knew what they were doing wasn't normal, she found comfort in it.

She awoke sometime after that, the pillow wet with her tears, and a serenity over her that she couldn't exactly explain. She liked the peace, and she liked that he was the one to give it to her. This fact didn't unnerve her until the next morning.

The nighttime was different like that. In that period between dreams, any decision seemed right. And that night, the idea of Luke with her felt right. But, it was morning, and in the morning she could see how things would change, and she remembered what she was like in relationships, and she remembered how much she valued his friendship and treasured how he was a constant in her life. And, when she thought about Rory at Chilton, and Max, and Friday Night Dinners, and her mother and the pudding, it was just too overwhelming. Ideas and rules and people that she had labeled as normal were slipping through her fingers, becoming abnormal, and she couldn't afford to lose another constant in her life. She just needed time to get these Luke-related thoughts out of her head, because if she didn't, things would change, and contrary to popular belief, she didn't like change.

After that morning, she didn't go to Luke's for two days.

A/N: Well, how was it? I realize it's a little angsty, and a little different from what I thought it would turn out to be, but I like it. And I promise you will like where the story ends up. But, how will I know if you liked it or didn't like it? When you review, of course. So please review to let me know of your thoughts. I always like to hear them.

I don't know how it became a tradition for this story, but now I feel like I have to end the chapter in a joke. I couldn't think of a good one myself, so here's one from my friend and yours, Jewels12: What's green and has 5 wheels?

:tap dances while we wait for the answer:

Grass! She lied about the wheels.

Well, there you go. If you hated it, you can contact Jewels on her profile :)

Don't forget to review!