Note: Sorry, the first chapter was mostly just explaining the situation; this one gets going a bit faster.
I must admit, I've had a lot of fun working with the characters, and shaping their opinions.
Also: I don't own Batman or any of its characters.
Enjoy the Next Chapter!
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"Too much poof!" Trish declined to another broach and handed back the one she'd already been wearing. "I am a woman, not a fairy princess!" The wedding helpers hurried around, replacing the bows and trimmings on the shelves and dressers. "You look so beautiful," Her father told her again, certainly not echoing her sediments.
"I need some space," She confessed to her made of honour, her older sister. "I don't even know if I'm ready for this, even though I do love Dave." She scratched her cheek, accidentally pulling off a smudge of foundation, and her hair caught in her gloves. "Damn it," She swore, as her sister helped her fix it up. "I'm just not cut out for this type of thing." Marie just smiled sympathetically, "Trish, this is supposed to be the happiest day of your life, now either get married to the man you love and live happily ever after, or you decide it's a bad idea have some explaining to do, I can't stop you or help you either way." Trish nodded, " Excuse me Marie," She whispered, "I think I have to go get married." And she left the bride's maid in the hallway, heading, unsure, for the altar and her equally nervous fiancée.
"We are gathered here today, to join these two people in holly matrimony"
The minister began a drab, lifeless ritual, loveless, flameless, oh who could beat a marriage like this, a marriage made of money. It was to laugh, thought the man who stood looking over it all as he and his hired goons moved in on the overly extravagant ceremony. It was to laugh, and so, bursting into a fit of creepy, and uncontrollable giggles, he did. Marriage, was a joke, he mused as the masked bandits flanking him silenced those preparing for the next part of the great wedding. Love, was also a joke, just some made up emotion the depressed masses had invented to fill their empty, bottomless minds. And it never did, and that was what made them so much fun to play with.
"Everybody knows, laughter is the only cure for emptiness," He told no one in particular, bursting into another fit of just that. "After all," He breathed between chuckles. "It worked for me!" Now, he wondered, how could he play with the mindless masses today?
The huge puffy dress, the long train, the giant cake, giant decorations, giant everything! Trish tried to keep herself from ripping her hair out as she ignored the minister in order to think over how unsuitable this wedding was. Whatever comes out at first, she thought, whatever I say without thinking about it, that will be my answer.
"Do you, Dave, take Trish, to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, in poverty and wealth?"
Trish bit her lip, trying not to fidget, this was it, this was how it all went down, and she wasn't going to do this. It was nothing, but a big scam, the rich marry the rich: the rich stay the rich! Dave's family, her family, ugh, it made her give her groom a look of disdain.
"Do you, Trish, take Dave to be your lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health…" The minister began and for a second, Trish's mind was stolen from the fate in front of her when something in the crowd caught her eye. "For as long as you both shall live?" There was her cue, she opened her mouth, and to her surprise, she heard the squeaky, mocking voice of a man Gotham had come to know very well.
A purple sleeve went around her neck, holding her where she was as the Joker put a gun to her temple. She refrained from saying so, but she was angry with him. Not for ruining the wedding, but for her big chance for her family at last to disown her and leave her alone, her chance to prove what she really wanted, she was mad at him for not letting her ruin her own wedding. She was in fact, enraged by the time the clowns had surrounded her entire wedding party, holding what looked like giant guns, she couldn't have been sure.
"You see," Her captor spoke, and she concluded that he wasn't quite as strong as he seemed by the way he had taken her hostage. "We're here to turn this boring little wedding into a fun little game," He smiled, despite always smiling, due to his ragged scars and the make up he used to cover them. "You have five minutes to leave, all of you, and if you don't, I shoot the pretty little bride." Trish struggled a bit, testing his hold on her, and snorted at the remark, deciding she'd take her chances speaking her mind. "I'm as tall as you," She grunted, receiving a big, bright, wide, red smile. "Shush, now, let's watch." Trish looked over to where one of the fastest guests was nearly at the line of henchmen, he reached it and sheepishly tried to pass: that's when Trish first learned the smell of burning wedding guests. The Joker laughed hysterically into her ear, but she was momentarily distracted with the inhumanity of seeing her family member searing and thrashing in agony. "And there's the catch," Joker spoke again, "You have to get past the fire!" He burst into another fit of laughter, as the bride tried to break free, which was hard in all of her fluff and flamboyance. She was pretty sure he was standing on her dress. "If I had my way," She muttered struggling, "I would have been dressed more suitably for something like this."
"You way? What's this, the pretty bride not happy?"
"You're torching my wedding guests, in case you didn't know!" Trish exclaimed, anger in full force now. "If you want to help buddy, how 'bout letting go of me, instead of playing psychiatrist!" The result was a tighter grip around her neck, and a gun being waved in her face. "You're an angry one!" The Joker frowned, his scars eyrie when his expression changed. "Very rude for someone who has a mere two minutes to live." Trish just thrashed a bit more.
More guests succumbed to fiery torture as they tried to prevent the tragic loss of a bride, no one made it through, and Trish was running out of precious time. "You, let my wife go or else!" O, god, oh, god, Trish crumbled, what an idiot her ex-fiancée truly was. "Put the gun down Dave!" She said firmly. "He'll shoot you, I'm not kidding, now put the gun down!" The Joker just tee-heed and ha-had a bit more over her shoulder. "Ooh, better listen to what the lady says mister, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned you know!" He laughed more, a continuous snickering giggle that was wearing Trish's nerves thin. "Shut-up you!" She elbowed him, catching him momentarily off guard, but he just kept on laughing. "Just go!" She told Dave, "Let this creep have what he wants!"
"Yes," He agreed, but kept pointing his weapon, "He wants to steal the whole city's dignity and to ruin our wedding. I won't let that happen!" Trish scowled, "It's too late, the place is a three ring circus, clowns and all, now go!"
"NO!"
"…Time's up!"
Trish would later admit, inwardly at least, how lucky she was that Dave had taken the shot, she wasn't entirely pleased with his aim, but her wriggling was throwing him off she supposed. He missed, and The Joker fired back, also, thankfully with lousy aim, and he hit Dave, shattering a knee, but Trish managed to get away. She made a run for the fallen man, but guess who was still standing on her dress. She glared daggers at the smirking figure, making and attempt to tear the delicate material, it ripped and she took of running, trying not to trip on the decorations as she headed for Dave. "Well don't just stand there!" She heard somewhere in the background, and her legs ended up in a swell of painful heat, her dress was on fire. She cursed, trying "stop drop and roll" and finding it useless, there were too many folds in the skirt! She got up, noticing the enemy in hot pursuit, and tried not to be overcome with pain, "Damn-it" She swore one last time, and to the astonishment of all present, she somehow removed the bulky piece of clothing and got to her fallen love at last, in only her undergarments. "Don't move," She told him as he stared disbelieving and at the same time she took his gun from him. "Nobody moves 'til the cops get here!" She told the Joker and his entourage, hoping she wasn't as useless with a gun as most of her friends. She was just greeted with more annoying laughter, surprise, surprise.
"Hey lady, you're at your own wedding, you're guests are being burned to death, your dressed in only your finest lingerie…" He began finding it hard to talk through his continuous cackling and had to pause, "You might as well shoot me, I mean, what more can you do?" Trish scowled some more, as if it were possible, and began to speak. "Because I value lives, even the lives of crazed loonies like you, and even you have the right, as an American to stand trial in the court of law. Now shut up before I blow your brains out."
"Oh, ha, ha, aren't you a laugh, miss constitution, don't get political on me sweetie, I don't do politics." Sirens rose up in the background as a vehicle drove onto the grass. "See you around wedding lady."
Mature, real mature, Trish thought as her wedding crashers drove away, hitting everything possible on the way out, just for the sport of it. "I hate weddings!" She raged, throwing the gun on the ground and stomping over to the podium to steal the covering for a makeshift dress, she then walked back to Dave and sat down beside him, fuming, or pretending to anyway. There was something oddly amusing about all of this now that it seemed to be over, hey, she could laugh at herself, couldn't she? Despite the singed guests, the burns, the damaged boyfriend and slightly bruised collar bone, she tried to take the arrival of the police and the cancellation of her wedding in stride. Besides, she thought, recognising a bit of irony, wasn't it I who didn't want to be married anyway?
The thought managed to stick, and led to the realization, that after all of the day's events, she could meet with Harvey Dent sooner, and get on her new job quicker. "Who'll be laughing when I convince the people you're just a tricky child and they lock you in jail, huh psycho clown boy?" She muttered to her self as several people worried over her.
Who will be laughing then?
For Trish, the hardest part of "The Dead Wedding" as the media had begun to call it, was burying her own wedding guests. Goodbye, she thought, thanks for coming to the wedding that wasn't actually going to happen, and being burnt alive because you came, rest in peace amen. That flashed through her mind, with every grave and casket, thanks for coming, even though no one was going to get married, my, my, look how you suffered for it.
Tears she just couldn't stop fell as soon as she was back in her apartment, grateful to be alone so she could cry. "I'm a humanitarian," She whimpered to her goldfish, "And people were subject to cruel torture at my wedding! I was subject to cruel torture at my wedding, the wedding itself was some form of cruel torture!" She sat up, quieting herself as she stared around her tiny dining area. "I have to do something, people deserve not to live in fear of this madman, and people deserve to know they can hope!" She wiped her eyes and half an hour after when she was showered and changed, she picked up the phone, there would be hope, there would be salvation. "Harvey!" She spoke in her usual friendly tone. "I trust you've seen the news!"