Unfortunately I am kind of in a lull right now, so my writing isn't the best...but maybe it never was .

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, as all of you know.

Enjoy:

Chapter 4: I Love Her, I Love Her Not

POV: Lily Evans

The next few days passed uneventfully. On Tuesday's patrol with James I did find a couple of third years, one Ravenclaw and one Slytherin, ready for a duel, so we had to take points away from them and send them off to their dormitories with a few detentions. Honestly, you would've at least expected the Ravenclaw to know better. But that was really all. Not that I'm complaining.

Also during our Wednesday evening patrol James was an hour late and when he did arrive, the first words out of his mouth put me into momentary shock. This is what happened:

James: running up to me, panting. "I'm so sorry, Lily. I had to help Sirius with his Potions homework." Maybe that part didn't surprise me. (Sirius having not finished his homework is a usual occurrence, but this next part did catch me off-guard.)

Me: "Oh. That's fine."

James: "Oh, and Evans, I no longer love you. You were right all along; I was only in it for the chase. I've grown tired of you." I looked at him then, but he was looking at the ground, completely expressionless.

Me: my eyes widened in surprise and I looked at him, a smile playing on my lips. "Good for you," I told him and we continued walking.

He glanced up then, his eyes searched my expressions, I assume trying to detect my feelings or emotions, but I kept a neutral face. Besides, my expression, if I had let my emotions show, would have only been a humorous one; after all these years and he has just now realized this? What a dimwit.

On Friday morning I sat with Marlene, Alice, and Frank once again. During breakfast, I noticed the love between Alice and Frank was even more obvious than it used to be. The entire breakfast, as they squabbled over some random assignment due for the later on today, Marlene and I exchanged comical expressions, wanting to burst out laughing and just tell the two to go out already.

Breakfast ended and I had Transfiguration first. As I took my seat, James walked up to me and stole the seat beside me.

"Morning, Evans," he told me.

"Good morning, Potter," I replied, sighing. I had decided to at least attempt to be decent to him since we had to be together so often.

"So, Professor Dumbledore talked to me earlier during breakfast saying that we needed to schedule a prefects meeting sometime soon and discuss different things, such as Quidditch, Hogsmeade dates, et cetera," he told me professionally.

"Alright, I guess we can do it this weekend."

His eyebrows immediately lowered in concentration. "Sorry, Evans, I don't believe I can. You see, I have Quidditch tryouts on Saturday and it will probably take quite a while."

"Ah. Well, Sunday then. The tryouts surely can't take both days, can it?"

"No, suppose not. Sounds good."

"Sunday then, one o'clock."

"It's a date," James said, winking at me.

I sighed and rolled my eyes, focusing my attention on Professor McGonagall who was explaining how to do an extremely complex spell.

POV: James Potter

How can I be so incredibly stupid? Like she wants to hear the whole "date" jokes right now, right after I told her I no longer loved her, which, of course, was a complete lie.

I mentally smacked myself, hard, upside the head wishing I could take that back. But at least she didn't hit me or retort. She simply rolled her eyes and went back to ignoring me like she did in Potions last week. I shrugged.

As McGonagall talked, I thought about Wednesday night when I told her that I no longer loved her. I had told her that I no longer loved her and that she was right all along about me being in it for the chase. I basically said what I had told my fellow Marauders. She seemed to buy it, but the entire rest of the evening I watched her to see if she was upset in any way. Either she is a really good actress and was able to hide her feelings or she truly wasn't upset by it because twice I could've sworn I saw her lips twitch upward.

Once McGonagall was done, I had to try out the spell she had just taught us on a turtle. Unfortunately, I hadn't been listening at all, so when we were supposed to begin, I stared stupidly at the turtle and side-glanced at Lily to try and figure it out.

I couldn't tell because she wasn't saying the spell out loud, it was one of those "in-the-head" things, so I asked her what we were doing, feeling incredibly embarrassed.

She sighed as if she was expecting this. "Don't you ever listen?" She asked me and though I knew it was meant to be rhetorical, I shook my head anyway. She shook her head and explained to me what exactly we were doing.

I followed Lily to lunch, which was right after double Transfiguration, while talking to my two best friends, Sirius and Remus.

"So I don't think she is as repulsed by me as she has been the past six years," I replied to them, simply glowing with happiness.

"And why do you think that, Prongs?' Sirius said, grinning.

"Because she talked to me without any name calling or glaring when I said that we had a 'date'. All she did was an eye-roll and then she turned away, but I blame that on McGonagall talking about something I wasn't paying attention to. If she hadn't begun talking, though, I'm still pretty sure it would have just been an eye-roll." I was still grinning like an idiot, happy and giddy.

"Wow, Prongs, you are so hopeless," said Sirius at the same time Remus said, "But I thought you were no longer in love with Lily?"

Immediately I was brought back down from the clouds to the ground. "Right. I'm not, I'm just excited that we are on the slow process to friendship, Moony."

Remus rolled his eyes, but with a smiling expression. "You keep telling yourself that, Prongs, you keep telling yourself that."

"I will," I replied to him. Remus simply sighed, exasperated at my sad attempts of convincing them that I no longer loved her. As soon as we had sat down, Peter came into the Great Hall carrying a stack of papers. He came and sat next to me.

"Oi, Wormtail, what on earth are you holding?" I asked him.

"The sign up sheet."

"For what?"

"The Gryffindor Quidditch team."

My mouth dropped.

"You have got to be kidding me?"

Peter shook his head and Sirius sighed.

"Well, mate, looks like tomorrow is going to be spent all on finding new teammates. Have fun with that." Sirius grinned.

"You think I'm doing this alone? No way, the entire team will be out there with me so that we can all decide together who will be best and so that we will see who works well with who. You, Padfoot, along with all the rest of the teammates, will be stuck out there with me." I smirked at him and his face fell, his eyes narrowing to a glare.

"We'll see about that."

I took the list upstairs after lunch and decided that after dinner I would look through all the names and pray that some people signed up one hundred times so that I really wouldn't have to watch all these people.

Dinner came and I dug in quickly and raced upstairs to look at the list. Luckily I did find some first years I could cross off, narrowing down the numbers. Then I looked through anyone who just couldn't ride a broomstick at all, which took out a few more.

POV: Lily Evans

James was sitting in an armchair by the fireplace with a quill in his hand and scratching at something. I thought for a moment that he was doing homework and felt I might have a heart attack at the surprise of it but looking at it closer, I realized it was the dumb Quidditch sign up sheet.

"Hello, Evans," James grinned when he saw me walking up to him.

"Evening, Potter. I just wanted to go over some of the things we are going to have to cover with the Prefects on Sunday."

He nodded and gestured towards the seat next to him, which I took. Then he looked at me expectantly so I continued.

"We will have to discuss the rules, patrol nights so we will no longer have to do it every night, punishments for rule-breakers, and favoritism. Also, a few other things that are less important. Now at these meetings you are supposed to contribute, but I'm not positive you know all these things," I explained matter-of-factly.

He raised his eyebrows. "Thank you for having oh so much faith in me, Evans," he replied sarcastically.

"I just wanted to go over some with you," I answered back in a calm voice. "But if you already know them, then I don't have to." I made a move to get up but he stopped me.

"Well, why don't you go ahead and refresh my memory, just in case I did forget some?" he asked with a superior expression on his face.

"Alright then." I launched into all the rules and punishments and things of the like. When I had finished, he thanked me and we both went up to our dormitories. I was a little surprised that we hadn't had more squabbles, but I didn't mind; it was a tiresome thing to fight with one person all the time and it was nice to have a little break in that routine.

POV: James Potter

Not one fight occurred between the two of us as she explained how things work around here and as I thought of all the times I had broken almost every rule. There were times when I had to suppress a comment she wouldn't like, but I think my self-control handled my "no more annoying statements" thing pretty well.

I've been trying extremely hard not to say things that would infuriate Lily and our entire conversation where she would explain things and I would ask questions that she would answer to didn't include a single annoying statement. I was extremely proud of myself as I got ready for bed.

Lily seemed to have noticed this too for when we both parted and I bade her good night, she replied with "Good night, James." That's right, I got her to say my first name, a rare and incredibly unusual occurrence that I know I am still beaming from.

Unfortunately, Remus notices my large amount of cheeriness and comments on it.

"So, James, did you ask Lily out and she replied yes because you sure look happy?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Honestly, Moony, if she answered yes I would be way more happ—oh, wait, why would I be asking her out? It isn't like I'm in love with her or anything." I almost fell into the trap…almost.

He shook his head and muttered something that sounded like, "Oh please, this is stupid."

"What was that?" I asked him. "I'm going to need you to speak up."

"Oh nothing," he replied with a plastered on smile.

I glared at him and Sirius came in.

"So, tomorrow we'll have to get up early?" he whined once again.

"Padfoot, we are getting up a whole hour later than we do on school days and its for Quidditch, so stop complaining," I told him, throwing a pillow at his face.

It hit him and he glared, throwing it back. "But still, normally I sleep in until lunchtime. On Sunday morning, I don't want anyone to disturb me while I'm snoring; I have to catch up on my beauty rest at some point this weekend," he teased.

I shook my head and drew the red velvet curtains around my four-poster, ready for a nice sleep before tomorrow's tiring day.

The next morning, I forced Sirius to get up and we sauntered down to breakfast where we saw the rest of the team (Emmeline Trence as keeper, Gideon Prewett as a chaser, Sirius Black as a beater, and Michael Linnew as another chaser) and a whole bunch of the people trying out.

We finished up our breakfasts and I went to the pitch, where I made the team put on their Quidditch robes. Once everyone arrived, I stood up and introduced myself:

"Hello everyone, my name is James Potter and I am the captain this year as well as seeker. These are our robes," I stated gesturing to my own and my fellow teammates', "and are used to get dirty in." I grinned and noticed a few high maintenance second year and third year girls leaving. I rolled my eyes and thought, wimps. I had everyone take a broom from the shed or grab their own and took them all to the Quidditch field where I watched them fly around and saw whether or not they could maneuver a broom. I was able to eliminate more when I noticed quite a few people couldn't.

Finally, I had them split into two groups: the ones trying out for chaser and the ones trying out for beater. I noticed Lily's roommate, Penny Lee, was trying out for chaser. Sirius watched the possible beaters practice and Gideon and Michael oversaw the chasers as they practiced. Emmeline and I looked over both groups and we were able to eliminate more people that way.

The last thing, when we were down to only a few chasers (the beater we had decided on was a fourth year named Rodric Jones), which included Penny and two fifth years.

All three were required to play a short scrimmage, Emmeline being keeper, Sirius and Rodric being beater, and Gideon, Michael, and I playing as chasers all against the three.

It ended up that Penny was able to score three magnificent goals and one of the fifth year boys was able to score once. The other one basically left when Penny scored her third goal, so we stopped there. Penny was declared the last chaser.

Penny and Michael were both gleaming with pride as we returned. Surprisingly enough, we were able to make it to lunch only a little late due to my amazing efficiency skills with the eliminating process.

The new team returned to the Great Hall after changing, sweating buckets caused by the rays of sunlight hitting us from the afternoon sun, and we sat down as a team for lunch. Marcel and Lily rushed over to us to congratulate Penny, who was still beaming.

I smiled, too, happy to see Lily so happy.

Remus and Peter had already finished lunch and I went to the library to find them studying; well, Remus was studying while Peter simply looked at his paper, completely lost.

"James!" he said when he saw me. "You can help me! I am so confused by muggle studies. What on earth is a 'lectric toothbrush?"

I laughed and bent down to explain to him the difference between a normal toothbrush and an electric one and how muggles used it to better clean their teeth or something.

When I finished, Remus glanced up at me, looked back down, then did a double-take. He noticed my messier than usual hair, dirt smudged face, and wide grin.

"What did you do?" he asked me.

"I found the best team ever!"

"Who did you add?" he asked me.

"Penny Lee as chaser and Rodric Jones as beater."

Remus nodded thoughtfully. "Good choices, I suppose."

I nodded and heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Excuse me, Marlene, can I sit here?"

My grin expanded and reached my glasses. I turned around and saw Lily a few tables away taking a seat next to Marlene.

"I thought you no longer loved her?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrows.

"That doesn't mean I can't be excited to see her," I replied curtly, then turned around again to watch as she took out her books and began an essay we had to write.

I sighed, not understanding how she couldn't see how much I've changed within the summer.

Hasn't she noticed that I have not once tortured Snivellus? Or that I haven't broken any rules so far? Or let Sirius do anything bad? (Yet.)

I sighed. I just didn't understand her and probably never would.

Remus laughed quietly. He, of course, knew that I still loved her and probably always would. Even Peter knew I did because of his expression, which read, "Good luck with trying and failing yet again, mate."

I sighed once more and decided that if I continued thinking this, eventually it would become true and eventually I would no longer love the girl who would never love me.

POV: Lily Evans

On Sunday morning, I slept in as late as possible, which was almost until lunch time, a rare occurence for me, seeing as I am always on the go and rarely sleep in.

But I decided to give myself a break and get as much rest as possible. After all, on Tuesdays we begin real Astronomy lessons in the North Tower at midnight, so we will have even later nights than we already have.

I lethargically and methodically got ready and went downstairs to eat lunch. Penny and Marcel were up and I meant to eat lunch with them, but noticed for some odd reason that they were eating with the Marauders, so I chose to eat with Frank, Alice, and Marlene again. Lunch went by quickly and before I knew it, it was one o'clock and I was inside an empty classroom with James getting speedily ready for our meeting. A few moments later, prefects began arriving.

Once I noticed everyone was accounted for, I began.

"Hello everyone. I am Lily Evans and as you should know, Head Girl. This is James Potter, Head Boy. We have called this meeting to discuss things such as rules, punishments, and Hogsmeade dates." I launched into a discussion about all of this with James, to my surprise, contributing quite a bit.

After the meeting, I decided to tell him this, hoping not to boost his ego even higher, but wanting to tell him to keep up the good work all the same.

He slowly packed up and I waited until everyone had left.

"Um, James, you-did-good-today. I-was-quite impressed-by-your-contributions-to-the-meeting. Good-job," I told him, rushing through so that my words were running together.

He looked up, his face calm and unperturbed, but his eyes flaring with excitement and glory. "Why, thank you, Lily. I tried very hard to play up to my role," he answered, being my opposite by speaking the words slowly and clearly, making sure to enunciate every syllable.

"Your welcome." I smiled a little and left. James just stood there looking after me. I felt a little uncomfortable, feeling his gaze on my retreating back, so I hurried out of view, going, of course, to the library.

Surprisingly enough, I found both Penny and Marcel in the library. They were having trouble in transfiguration and needed my help, but the problem was that transfiguration, though I have received excellent marks on all my papers, it is a class I am just not very good at.

"Um, I'm sorry, but I'm not so sure how to help you. I could show you my paper, but I'm not very good at transfiguration and just sort of tried to understand it," I explained to them, my voice full of guilt.

"It's fine, Lils. We don't expect you to be superwoman and know everything. We just needed help and thought you could. I'll go find someone else," Marcel said, trying to sound light and friendly. She tried to brighten my mood by commenting that she thought I would know it, though it hurt realizing that I didn't. I've decided I need to spend more time on Transfiguration.

So for the rest of the afternoon, I read books over it, our past textbooks and others in the library, trying to learn everything I could drill into my mind about all the spells and various other things we had learned. It didn't help much though, considering I couldn't practice the spells. Before dinner, I found Marcel and Penny being helped by James Potter and Sirius Black, two I didn't realize knew transfiguration so well. I decided to possibly keep them in mind if I really was desperate for help.

Again during dinner Marcel and Penny ate with the Marauders, so I ended up eating with Marlene, Alice, and Frank once again. I was really beginning to like them a lot; I had never really had good friends, but I think I could consider Marlene a good friend now, especially since most evenings we do homework together even though we aren't in the same classes.

Dinner ended and the rest of the evening went by smoothly.

During patrols that evening, James and I made small-talk, though there were frequent awkward moments where we both didn't know what to talke about.

The weekend ended on a good note. But I should have known that those never last very long.

Review, please!!

Sorry if you didn't like it. I know it was kinda boring, but I swear it gets interesting by the next chapter!

Tell me anything you think I should add in (like characters or events you want to read about) to help me create a better story XD I'll see if I can incorporate it into my plot.

Thanks for reading,

-Mai