Author's Note: I really hope this is okay. I finished it quite quickly because I'm rather enjoying writing this. My friend has just offered to make me a video trailer for it and I'm DEAD excited because she's amazing at that sort of thing! This chapter is all in Jacob's POV.
Disclaimer: NO I DON'T OWN JACOB AND EDWARD, OKAY?! Damn. Or anyone else. They all belong to Stephanie Meyer – Lucky woman.

Nothing had changed. This didn't surprise me. What did surprise me though was that all the things I had grown up around and become accustomed to, was all suddenly amazing to me. My eyes scattered eagerly around anything they could find. I was home. It was like I had finally found the comfort blanket I had been searching for. Yes, even a werewolf needed some form of comfort blanket every once and a while.
My fast walking came to a stop, eyes closing as a long sigh of relief escaping my lungs through my mouth. I was in my human form now, the clouds threatening to rain down on my burning skin any minute now. Despite the eagerness to be back, something was bothering me though; Charlie.

He had seen me and that meant it was only a matter of time before his daughter knew who was back in town. She probably knew already. What would happen? My heart skipped at the thought – the hope – she might come and see me. I then realised what I was thinking and shook my head violently, my eyes opening as my brows furrowed down into a scornful frown. I wasn't supposed to be thinking that, in fact, I refused to let myself think like that. I came back to face my problems, not make them worse for myself. If Bella was to come then I would deal with it in dignity. I wasn't going to go back down the path I ran from so many months ago. I wasn't willing to put myself through that pain again. The pain was still there for me now, but it was fading. There was no way I would allow it to return completely. The pain of losing that one person I would have done anything to keep. The pain of being so close to her and yet so far away.
My thoughts drifted away as I realised I was now standing in front of my house, in my own drive way. I must have started walking again without even noticing. It was strange how things like that happened when you were in such deep thought. Bella had that affect on quite a few people actually from what I know. God help any man that was ever to meet her, that's all I can say. As a vampire...perhaps it would be different. I know I certainly won't be as attracted to her as I am – or was. For a start, she'd smell revolting. But secondly...more importantly...she wouldn't be Bella.

'That's not what I call forgetting.'

The voice inside my head was deep, serious and I knew exactly what Sam was going on about. I was close now. The pack could see inside my head once more, hear the thoughts that were swimming around in there. It probably wasn't the highlight of their day to be surrounded by Bella Swann every five minutes – in their heads, obviously.

'I'm working on it.' I responded inside of my head. I was talking directly to Sam, but I was aware that it wasn't just him who could hear me. Another voice came in and it took me a moment to recognise it, before realising it was dear old Embry.



'Welcome home.' He sounded slightly taunting as he said it, almost cold. Then again, I would be the same if I was in his place. I couldn't expect to come back and for the lads to all be okay with me. I left them for a long time, left their thoughts. The only person who would have really been fully reassured of my safety was Sam. Of course they were all going to be mad, but...I came back in the end. Hopefully that was going to count as something.

The look on Billy's face shocked me as I walked into my house. At first I had hesitated and I was sure that even with a face like mine, the nerves were showing clearly. I expected to see his face crumble, relief wash over him to know I was alive and then I expected that furious look to glaze over his eyes. For him to maybe even throw something at me, tell me I was an idiot for leaving. But no.
When I walked through the door, his face was so casual, like he had known I was going to come through that door. Then a familiar scent filled my nose. My head snapped in the direction o the kitchen. I saw Sam and the boys standing in the kitchen. This told me that Charlie had clearly known I was about to walk through that door and had pushed any reaction to the side, preparing himself to be typical non-emotional Billy Black. There goes my fun.
"You know, it's not really a surprise if you warn people first."
Those were the first words that came out of my mouth. I'd left these people for so long...6 months to be exact. No real warning, no sign of where I was going or staying, no proper goodbye. And yet, the first thing I said to them was some form of humour. How else was I supposed to deal with it? I was only male. And no matter what I said, one of them was going to punch me anyway.
My bets were on Paul.

I was right. In one swift movement, Paul had thrown a plate at my head. I'd managed to duck it of course and now I was down on my knees, sweeping up broken china. There was an awkward silence, the only sound coming from the TV as Billy's eyes continued to focus on the game. Something told me he wasn't paying attention to it though, just trying to make out that he was. I pushed myself back to my knees, clearing my throat loudly as I put the broken shards into the bin.
"Look – " I started. I was hoping that I could make them understand, though in all honesty I really had no idea what I was going to say. Thankfully, someone stepped forward and saved me.

"We don't need to hear it." Sam spoke with authority. I noticed Embry had opened his mouth as if to protest, but Sam silenced him with one look. I heard him warn the boy through thoughts, but decided not to comment on it. I tried not to smile at the snicker that escaped Paul and Quill's mouth as Embry was told off. My lips immediately stopped flickering when Sam's eyes fell on me again. I straightened myself out, eyes connecting with his as I folded my arms over my bare chest.
"The important thing is your back. Hopefully these past 6 months finally cleared your head." He muttered, though I could hear the doubt in his voice as he said this. "I'll fill you in on everything once you've settled back in." With that, he began to walk forward, ending the conversation. He walked straight past me without saying anything, reaching for the door, before pausing. He stood there for a moment, before looking over his shoulder.
"It's good to have you back." He told me. He spoke quietly, but after the words escaped his mouth, the corner of his lips twitched into a small smile and I felt a great deal of relief wash over me.

"Good to be back." I replied boldly. I heard one of the boys scoff, as if they thought I no longer found La Push interesting. I couldn't blame them for thinking this after I had been missing for so long. It was clear that not everyone would be as understanding and forgiving as Sam had. The door closed and I turned to face them, just in time to see another plate heading in my direction. I ducked, winced at the sound of it smashing against the wall before standing up straight to glare at Paul.
Paul glared back. A low growl escaped my throat without even meaning to, but for some reason, I couldn't be angry. We stared at each other, waiting for the other to look away. Paul then changed, his eyes creased slightly and a new 

sound escaped his mouth – laughter. This was followed by Embry, Leah and the others. I felt my eyebrows bury down into a frown, trying to work out what was going on. Then it hit me, as I looked around, I had to admit the scene was amusing. Comical. A warm, happy feeling rushed over me – something I hadn't felt in a while and the sound of my own laughter filled my ears. I was finally home.

No one asked about where I had been, what I'd done and other such things. In fact, no one mentioned the fact I had even run away. Once the laughter had died down, I was embraced into tight hugs; hugs that would have crushed a normal humans bones. The only person that did make things awkward was Leah. At first, I didn't care. I was still angry at her, why shouldn't I be? But then I remembered the last words I had said to her. They hadn't been pleasant either. I had been away long enough to learn that holding a grudge would get people nowhere. What's done had been done, but I was trying to teach myself not to live in the past, which is why...after I had survived punches on the arms and manly hugs, I pulled her into my own tight hug. We said nothing, but I knew that was enough to tell her that I didn't care and that I was sorry.
The last person to deal with was Billy. For a while, we had just stared at each other. His eyes told me nothing that he was feeling, but I knew my father well enough to know he was feeling many things right now. Anger, disappointment, embarrassment...but through all of that, I knew deep down that some part of him was relieved. Almost as if he could tell I knew this, he broke the emotionless stare by turning one side of his mouth up into a smile, which I happily return. We said nothing though; words would come later for us when we were alone. We were all now standing in the kitchen, apart from Billy who really was watching the game now, a few of the lads with beers in their hands while I seemed to eat whatever I could find. I was starving; there was no denying that; eating had been one of the many problems I suffered when I wasn't at home. As I shoved another handful of chips into my mouth, I let out a loud bark like laugh at one of them stories Embry was telling me. I was then punched in the arm by Leah for spraying her with crumbs.
"Swallow then laugh." She scorned. I merely swallowed then poked my tongue out at her. Immature I know, but bothered? Not at all.

"You should hear what happened to that Newton kid the other – "Embry was interrupted by a loud, rather frantic knock at the door. Silence fell over all of us and a few exchanged looks. I merely frowned, looking at them then at the door, wondering why no one was heading off to answer it.
Then I smelt it. I smelt her. Even after six months, I knew exactly what she smelt like – not to mention it was mixed with the disgusting smell of her filthy bloodsucker. My body tensed and the bag chips fell from my hand, landing on the floor with a soft thud. My eyes watched the door and I was now aware that everyone's eyes were on me.
I had suspected she would visit, but I hadn't expected it to be so soon. I wasn't prepared. I didn't know how I was going to act and I had no idea what she was even going to say. What if she had already been turned and I didn't know yet? After all, the smell might not be Edward, it might be her. I swallowed hard at the thought.

"Jacob?"
The voice was quiet and muffled as she called my name from outside. It sent shivers down my spine, but it pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Don't worry, mate. I'll get it." Paul had already begun walking towards the door as he said this, but I held an arm out to block his path. Saying nothing, I shook my head, letting him know that I didn't want him to sort it. I wasn't going 

to run and hide this time. I had to face my problems, even if it was in the form of a beautiful woman who I was in love with.
"I'll be right back." I mumbled to the group. I saw them all exchanged worried looks, but none of them tried to stop me as I left the kitchen. I could feel Billy's eyes boring into me, but he said nothing. They all knew that no matter what they said, nothing was going to stop me from opening that door now that I know who stood outside.

My hand hesitated as it reached for the handle and for a moment, I paused. I was ready to turn and head upstairs, get one of the others to tell her I wasn't here. Even though the temptation to do so was strong as ever, I pushed it back, gripping the handle and slowly pulling the door open. The scent got stronger now that she was standing right in front of me; I actually took a step back and crinkled my nose up. There was silence. I refused to look at her, but I could tell she was staring at me. I could imagine the look on her face – it would be mixed with relief, hurt and pain. I was annoyed by the fact I cared that I had hurt her. I didn't want to care. I didn't want to feel anything for her. That's when I realised what I had to do. If I wanted to do all of this, then I had to get Bella out of my life. As long as she was around, she would always be a part of me. I wanted her so bad to be a part of me, but I wanted it in a different way than she did. A way I knew wasn't possible. Her love for me was never going to be enough. I was never going to be enough.
I felt a pit of anger grow inside of me as all of this began to sink in and I finally turned my head to look at her. Our eyes met and I saw hers glisten slightly with tears that threatened to fall. Without a warning, I felt arms slip around my waist and her head was on my shoulders. A gasp escaped her lips and filled my ears, whether this was from tears or from the shock of the sudden heat that hit her body, I didn't know.
I remained stiff. It took a lot of self control. I wanted to throw my arms around her, spin her around, hold her tight and tell her how much I had missed her. But what would be the point? It wouldn't mean anything. Not to her. After a few minutes, she seemed to realise that I hadn't responded and slowly pulled away.

"Jacob, I can't believe it's you. I thought you weren't coming back." She said quietly, her arms falling back to her side as she searched my face for some sort of response. My jaw set and I said nothing, trying to keep my face emotionless.
'Don't let yourself get hurt.' I was surprised to hear Leah's voice in my head. It wasn't like her to say something like that, but I knew she was right. I couldn't let myself get hurt.
"What are you doing here, Bella?" I tried to keep my voice calm and collective, but even to me it sounded hard and cold.

Bella flinched and a part of me inside recoiled with guilt.
"I came to see you." She replied so innocently and so quietly that she sounded like a 5 year old caught with their hand in a cookie jar. "Charlie told me you were back and I was worried. I thought. - " Her words seem to catch in her mouth, almost as though she didn't know how to say what she wanted.

"I'm fine." I told her, once again my voice sounded harsher than I wanted it to. "Is that all?"

"Jacob, please. I...I've been scared. I didn't know what had happened to you or anything. You can't just come back like this and not explain things to me." Even though she was trying to tell me I couldn't do something, there was no tone of authority or pressure in her voice. Instead it sounded strained, like she was pleading with me.



"Yes I can. We're not..." My voice drifted off. I couldn't say it. I knew what I had to say and I couldn't say it. I could hear Embry and the other's in my head, telling me that I needed to do what was best for me, not her. That I shouldn't be afraid to hurt her – but I was. How could I hurt someone who meant so much to me? How could I hurt the one person, who at one stage was the only thing that kept me going? A new voice entered my head – Sam's.

'Don't do anything because you feel like you have to. Do what you feel is right. Don't do it because you think its right.'

His advice never made much sense to me. I looked up at the skies, then down at Bella, who looked more confused than ever as she watched me and waited for me to finish my sentence. How could I do what I felt was right? If I did that, I'd be kissing her now. Holding her so close to me that we looked like one large person, not two people holding. I couldn't do that. And so I made my decision. My eyes narrowed and I straightened myself out, turning my head to look over her shoulder. I couldn't look her in the face because I knew what was about to come out of my mouth.
"We're not friends anymore, Bella."

I heard another gasp escape her lips. This time it was out of shock. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply. There was a long silence and my head had finally gone quiet where they knew that interrupting me would be the worst thing anyone could do. The moment the words left my mouth, I regretted them. I didn't want to say it and I certainly didn't want it to be true. I was throwing everything away here. I was hurting myself just as much as it would hurt me to be around her. Was this how I was going to feel for the rest of my life? Stuck in a situation that was always going to be lose-lose for me?

"Jacob...I know a lot has happened, but...we're best friends." Her voice was almost inaudible now, barely a whisper. The pleading tone was still there.

My eyes snapped open, frowning slightly. Best friends? No, we weren't. We hadn't been friends for a long time. We hadn't been friends since the day I realised I was in love with her. Maybe we were friends to her, but to me...to me it would always be more. That was why I had to do this. My mouth opened, but nothing came out for a moment, before I finally found the courage to speak. I gave her an explanation. Not the one she wanted, but...one she needed to hear.
"We're not friends, Bella. We'll never be friends. We'll fight, we'll hurt each other and I'll be in love with you until it kills me. But we can never be friends." The harshness had left my voice now and it was the same noise level as hers. My eyes looked down and met her ones; I noticed a tear had fallen down her cheek. My hand rose to brush it away, but I froze half way. It hung in mid air for a moment, before I clenched it into a fist and let it fall back down to my side. She hung her head down, wiping it away with her own hand.

She no longer spoke. She stared at her own feet for a moment, before looking up and nodding. "Right." Her whole body turned and her back was now the only part of her I could see. I stepped forward, ready to tell her I didn't mean it and beg for forgiveness but a hand was suddenly around my wrist, pulling me back inside – my senses told me it was Billy.
"Bella – " I started, but I stopped. She didn't seem to hear anyway, she had already disappeared down the drive way so fast that she may as well have been running. I knew where she was going – back to the line, where her lover was waiting. Anger boiled up inside of me at the thought of her crying in his arms and my regret faded away.
"You know, for someone whose called people so much pain, you're pretty good at playing the victim!" My voice was a loud bellow as I yelled after her. I hadn't even known I was saying it until I finished. She froze and turned to stare at 

me, eyes wide and her face twisted in pain. Why the hell had I said that? It wasn't true. The thought of her and Cullen together had wound me up so much that I wanted her to feel the hurt I was suffering. I wanted to take it out on someone else in hope that it would make me feel better, but it didn't.

"Screw you, Jacob."
Her three simple words crushed me inside. Before I could say anything, she was gone. She had turned and run, disappearing.
I don't know how long I stood in the doorway. I started to rain and it pelted down on me, dripping my hair and my trousers, but still I stood there, staring at the place she had been standing not too long ago.

What had I done?