Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters yada yada yada...
"Greetings Soul Reapers. I am Syazel Aporro Granz, the 8th Espada. I am pleased to make your acquaintances, though you won't be alive much longer. I am more than just an Espada, I am also the most brilliant and intelligent scientist to ever live. You have are nothing compared to me Kisuke Urahara. I am like a giant boulder, and you are a miniscule pebble."
"Excuse me?" Urahara intercedes, "I think you've lost your mind. There is no such thing as the 'most brilliant scientist'. All scientist are brilliant. A five year old girl could discover something we never even thought possible. You're just crazy."
"What!??! How dare you! I know everything about your Urahara! Do not believe for one second that you can defeat me!" Granz shrieks.
"You are ridiculous. Not only do you think you are completely indefectible, but you also believe that you are indefeasible as well. I think it's time for you to get a reality check. If you were indefectible everyone would like you, which we don't, and if you were indefeasible, you would be the 1st Espada, not 8th. Is there a psychologist available for you to see about your obvious mental illnesses?"
"WHAT!??!??!?! I'm going to kill you! You will see how perfect I am!" Granz yells losing his mind.
"Yes? Is there a problem?" Urahara asks playing dumb.
"What do you mean is there a problem!?! You just insulted me! Of course there is a problem!"
"I don't see how that constitutes as a problem… But whatever you say Mr. Crazy"
Granz snaps. He draws his sword and charges directly at Urahara. Urahara easily dodges the attack and kicks Granz on his way past, sending him into the wall. Granz has completely lost his cool, all he cares about is ending Kisuke Urahara's life. Granz turns back around screaming like a wild man. Urahara's taunts created the affect he was hoping for. Urahara knows that a berserk man can not defeat one thinking clearly, it was just an unwritten law of battle. Granz then leaps at Urahara, his sword held high. His goal was to bring it down on Urahara's head and end the battle quickly, but he never hits his target. Urahara had pulled out Benehime and brought her up to defend him, parrying the blow effortlessly. Granz then takes stance and begins barraging Urahara with a series of quick thrusts and feints, trying to catch the man offguard. It never worked though, Urahara either dodged or parried every blow he threw. Becoming more frustrated by the second, Granz throws all his energy into one last assault. He then shoots a massive cero at Urahara, hoping to destroy the man completely. Urahara guarded against it with Benehime's shield, however. Before Granz can move, Urahara sends his own cero-like blast at him, injuring him critically.
Urahara was surprised by how strong the Espada was. He hadn't expected him to survive much longer than Yammy. While he wasn't paying attention, Granz disappeared. Urahara found him with one his fraccion, not suspecting anything weird at all. Then, one of the most disgusting events that Urahara ever witnessed occurs, Granz eats his flaccion. Worse than that, eating the fraccion recovered him, making him ready for a fresh new fight. This was bad for Urahara. He was tired, exhausted even. The scientist Espada in front of him had put up a good fight. Urahara decided then that he couldn't underestimate any more of the foes up ahead.
"Susure, Fornicarás." Granz says unexpectedly, swallowing his sword. His body then swelled to humongous proportions and exploded, leaving Granz in his released state. He now had a pair of wing-shaped structures from his back while his lower body transformed into a flock of long tentacles. Blood-like liquid was dripping from his clothes, hair, fingertips, and wings in this state.
Oh crap Urahara thought to himself. He knew he was in for a rough ride. Deciding it was his turn to take the offensive, he attacks Granz. He couldn't have done anything stupider. The disgusting liquid seeping of Granz ended up touching him, and right before his eyes, a copy of him appeared. Urahara was not only up against an enemy he didn't comprehend as well as he assumed he did, he was also up against himself, and not in some weird zen teaching way; this other him would kill him.
Just as he's thinking of a plan, Urahara's clone attacks him. Urahara was only half prepared and just barely managed to parry the blow, bringing Benehime up at the last possible moment. This fight had just gone from his favor to his enemy's in about fifteen seconds, he did not like how things were going. This is when he finally decides that it's time to fight all out. He lifts Benehime to his eye level, points it at Granz, and says very clearly, "I'm going to kill you."
As Granz just stands there laughing his head off at what he thought to be the funniest thing he'd heard in a long time, Urahara strikes. He strikes swift and hard too. "Sing, Benehime!" Urahara roared, sending a much larger blast at his foe than usual. Granz's facial expression changed from pure exhilaration to tremendous fear. The blast hit him head on and sent the Espada flying backwards at an extreme velocity that would kill any normal human.
The 8th Espada however, was not normal. He refused to die. He came stumbling out of the hole in the wall just created by him glaring at Urahara with pure hatred gleaming in his eyes. He did not appreciate someone actually hurting him.
Urahara had made a mistake though. He had forgotten about his clone that was created for the sole purpose of destroying him. The vile creature bounded in unexpectedly and stabbed his sword into Urahara's leg. Infuriated, Urahara lobs the thing's head of in one swift blow in retaliation. Fortunately for Urahara, the people he travelled with weren't complete idiots, and they had destroyed the fraccion while he and Granz weren't paying attention so that the Espada would no longer be able to heal himself.
Unexpectedly, Granz begins to laugh maniacally. "You see! You have thrown your best attacks at me and I am still alive. Nothing you do can defeat me! And even if you do somehow manage to defeat this body by some miracle, I can come back! I am like a phoenix, I will exist for eternity. I can impregnate my enemy and then chew my way out, killing the host instantly. No matter what you do Kisuke Urahara I will win. You should have done that blow first. I grow immunity to attacks as I observe them. It is futile for you to persist in this contest. I am victorious, you just don't know it yet."
"That's where you're wrong. See, you forgot one crucial thing. You haven't impregnated me yet. The only chance you wouldve had is when that nasty goo of yours landed on me, and I eradicated that stuff off of me immediately. I can and will kill you Granz. You're fraccion are dead, so you can't heal yourself anymore. I am going to finish this."
"Foolish man. Fine, continue to fight me. Enjoy death."
At that Granz lunges at Urahara, impaling him instantly with his sword. What Granz didn't expected however, was a blow-up Urahara. The object he stabbed deflated instantaneously, but it was the distraction Urahara needed. Urahara then jumped out of nowhere, lobbing Granz's head off instantaneously, somehow making sure none of the blood touched him for he had learned to put nothing past that lunatic. He then cleaned Benehime, and walked away victorious. Another win for Kisuke Urahara.