Titania

What is it with weak men and not finishing stories? Now I'm sure you are all pleased that I saved the best for last! This is a story about Commander Greil…and…me.

Ike groaned again.

Mist snapped, "Ike, that's rude! Don't insult a story about our father."

Now as you all know Greil was the most amazing man in the world…

"Objection!" Soren shouted, "Ike is the most amazing man in the world!"

Titania began to argue with Soren, when Boyd intervened, "You're both wrong. Oscar is the most amazing man in the world!"

Rolf added his two cents, "No, it's Shinon, and that's final!"

"I don't think they all know, Titania…" Ike said, smiling that he was holding his own in this competition.

Well, as all of you except Soren, Boyd, and Rolf who are all INCREDIBLY BIASED know, Greil was the most amazing man in the world.

"Like you aren't?" Soren objected again, "Don't even TRY to pretend. 'Most amazing man in the world' is a 100% subjective statement, and you are being extremely dogmatic. If anyone has a right to be dogmatic it's me because Ike says I'm always right!"

"Of course he does!" Boyd says, "YOU think HE'S the most amazing man in the world! Even though it's obviously Oscar."

"Well remind me of that when Oscar saves my life…" Soren said rolling his eyes.

Soren, if you don't shut the hell up I'll put an axe in your back, and…

"Be fired immediately?" Ike interrupted.

Fine, Ike. I THINK Commander Greil was the most amazing man in the world… and now, I don't even remember what my story was going to be about! Thank you so much Soren! And Boyd and Rolf, too, but to a lesser extent. Fine, I guess I'll just tell a different story. Well one time Boyd said that I was like a really nice mom and I got mad at him…

"Wow, you really do get mad at compliments. Shinon, I'm sorry I doubted you. Here's the gold I owe you," Soren said while handing Shinon a satchel of gold.

"Thanks, half-pint," he replied.

SOREN! STOP INTERRUPTING ME!

"Come on, Soren… you really should stop chatting…but usually you're so quiet I'm tempted to let you keep doing it…" Ike said.

"Okay, I'll stop."

I WAS GOING TO SAY, but then I realized that he meant it as a compliment and decided to simmer down.

"Titania, did you notice your stories are as dull as hell?" asked Shinon.

"Wasn't me this time, but you know I was thinking it."

ARGH! I CAN'T BELIEVE I SAT RESPECTFULLY THROUGH ALL YOUR CHEESY LOVE STORIES AND AWKWARD MOMENTS AND CHILDHOOD ANECDOTES AND GIANT RACCOONS AND OSCAR BEING AMAZING JUST SO I COULDN'T TELL MY STORY! I am going LAST! You guys all went BEFORE me! I KNOW that the stories get boring after a while, but I should still be allowed to GO!

Titania went on a rampage, which not even the serenity of Rhys could stop.