Chapter 3 - Seeking Help

EPOV

I found myself driving to Jasper and Emmett's house Sunday afternoon, after succumbing to my urge to tell someone about my recently acquired obsession, the one that featured a certain girl I saw walking on campus Friday morning. Her smile and laugh were my constant companions all day Saturday, never leaving the forefront of my mind. Even hanging out with the guys, didn't grant me a reprieve from her.

Laughing to myself, I recalled Emmett's story of meeting the beautiful Rosalie Hale. No one ever turned down Emmett before in his life. A glint of determination was present in his eyes as he told Jasper and me about her. I was certain that wouldn't be the last time we heard her name cross his lips.

I was still mulling over Emmett's woes, when the mystery girl made another appearance in my head. I hoped talking about her might alleviate some of the insanity I was feeling from not knowing who she was, or how to see her again.

Out of my two best friends, Jasper was the safer bet for this kind of discussion. He wouldn't make stupid jokes the whole time, or find a way to embarrass me later with this information. I knew telling Jasper meant, eventually, Alice would know too, since they told each other everything, but I would deal with that when the time came. Besides, if I didn't break out of my cranky, distracted mood soon, she would probably figure it out on her own, she was really annoying like that.

I needed to tell someone or I feared my head would explode.

This afternoon, I knew Jasper would be home, alone, because Emmett was a gym fanatic and worked out every free afternoon he had, and Alice was working with some special client today, so I decided to give it a try.

Pulling up to their house, I wondered what the best way to approach this was – should I act nonchalant about the whole thing or show Jasper that I was really going crazy over this girl?

Unable to make up my mind, I knocked on the door quickly, and let myself in. Really I should have been paying rent I was over here enough, but that didn't mean I could walk in without announcing my presence first. My mother had raised me to be respectful and considerate of other people's space.

Calling out to Jasper as I walked into the living room, I decided a simple 'Can I talk to you?' would be sufficient, and to not show him the full extent of my fixation. Only enough to convince him it was serious.

Not hearing Jasper anywhere, I went in search of him. It didn't take long for me to deduce that he must be in his bedroom. The house wasn't that big, with only two bedrooms and one and a half bathrooms, not many places to hide.

I slowly made my way down the hall that led to his bedroom, and hesitated outside his door, hearing a muted voice from within the room.

Were there any other cars around? I asked myself, not recalling in my haste to talk to Jasper. Oh, please don't be naked with my sister in there.

I lifted my hand to knock, but before it made contact with the door, I heard a faint 'phew, phew' come from the other side. What the hell?

Confused and forgetting completely about my previous anxiety of finding him with my sister, I called out, "Jasper?"

"Edward?! Hold on, don't come in," Jasper spoke quickly, his panicked voice a higher pitch than normal.

I heard shuffling and some muttering, then footsteps heading toward me. A shirtless Jasper opened the door, looking slightly disheveled and out of breath. My stomach dropped and that anxiety about my sister came back in full force.

"If you're busy, I can come back later," I said, raising my hands in front of my chest and edging away from him, not daring to glance inside the room for fear of what I might see.

"What? No, it's okay. What's up?" he asked, opening the door wider to take a step toward me in a reassuring way.

I quickly focused on the floor in front of Jasper, unable to look at him.

He frowned, puzzled; his forehead furrowed. Then his expression changed to one of understanding and slight embarrassment – his eyebrows shot up and his mouth formed an 'O'.

"Alice isn't here, if that's what you're thinking," he assured me, realizing the reason behind my strange behavior. He opened the door the rest of the way and swept his arm wide. "See? All alone."

I took a deep breath and finally felt myself relax as I saw he was, in fact, telling the truth. "Dude, don't do that to me. You can't answer your door like that," gesturing to his half-naked, just-out-of-bed look. "I almost had a heart attack, thinking I had interrupted you and…well, you know…"

"Sorry," Jasper mumbled, fighting a smile.

I took another deep breath and remembered the sound I had heard to make me call out his name in the first place. "So, what were you doing? I thought I heard something that sounded like…" I trailed off, spotting a mound of something shoved into the corner of Jasper's room. My jaw dropped and a wave of utter hilarity washed over me. "No, please, tell me you weren't," I pleaded, barely choking back my laughter.

Jasper flushed and hung his head, "Yeah, I was."

I tried to stop it, but failed miserably. I started laughing so hard my legs gave out, I leaned against the wall for support.

One thing most people don't know about Jasper is that, on top of being a huge history nut, he knows everything about anything concerning the Civil War. However, he found that being a die-hard confederate supporter, like any good Texas boy should be, didn't bode well for him up here. So, he learned to keep his particular views to himself and his closest friends.

Occasionally, to get his 'fix' for something pertaining to the Civil War, he would re-enact certain key battle scenes, which strangely explained the toy soldiers, shoved into the corner of Jasper's room. He was playing with them, reconstructing some scene from the Civil War.

I knew he did this, but knowing and seeing were two completely different things.

I tried to catch my breath as I asked, "What was the 'phew, phew' for? I don't remember lasers being used in the Civil War in any of the history books," I gasped out between laughing bouts, holding my aching sides.

Jasper's face reddened from embarrassment, but he said nothing. He shut his bedroom door behind him and stomped down the hall to the living room.

"I'm sorry," I said to his retreating back, sobering up. I felt bad for laughing at him. What he did when he was alone in his bedroom was his own business and I had no right to laugh at him…even if he was playing with dolls and making laser sounds.

I trailed behind him into the living room. "I really am sorry, I shouldn't have laughed."

"It's alright," he sighed. "At least you didn't laugh for an hour like Emmett did when he found out. That's why I don't do it anymore when he's home." He shrugged and changed the subject. "So, what's up?"

"Could we talk for a minute?" I asked, gesturing to the armchair and couch.

"Sure." He sat down in the armchair.

The irony that he left me the couch wasn't lost on me. Once a psychiatrist, always a psychiatrist.

"What's on your mind?" he began as I sat on the couch. "Does it have anything to do with what's been bothering you recently?"

I shook my head in amazement, I should have known Jasper would pick up on my mood. He was very perceptive at knowing what someone was feeling, one of the many ways he was a great counselor.

"Yeah, sort of," I paused. "I'm not really sure how to talk about this, but I need to know you won't tell Alice anything that is said between us today."

"Edward, I don't think I'd be worried about that," Jasper laughed. "You know she has other-worldly insight that makes it hard to keep things from her."

"I know, but I still, want you to promise," I insisted.

"Okay, I promise, no telling Alice," Jasper swore, holding up three fingers in the universal Boy Scout sign.

"Thanks," I settled back into the couch and started my tale of fascination and obsession. I told him about first seeing her and the way she hadn't left me since. "No one person can really be that irresistible, can they? Why can't I get her out of my mind?" I asked, desperation lacing my voice.

Jasper sat back and stared at me, "I don't know why you can't get her out of your mind. I guess she's done the one thing no one else has been able to do – she has caught your attention. She's intrigued you," he explained. "You want to see her again, right?"

I nodded.

"Meet her? Talk to her?"

I nodded at each question.

"Okay, now about the irresistible part, you should know better than to question that, just look at me and Alice. She's irresistible to me, and I to her."

I grimaced at his example, but understood what he meant. "I get what you're saying, but let's try to stay away from calling my sister 'irresistible,' alright?"

"I'll try," he chuckled. "Basically, I'm saying this isn't an uncommon experience. It's just unique to you, so you don't know how to handle it."

"So what do you suggest, doctor?" I asked, trying to keep my tone neutral.

"Find her, talk to her. Maybe she'll be the most boring person you've ever met or maybe she'll have the social skills of a two year-old and your 'obsession,' as you call it, will be fixed."

"That's true, but what if…," I stopped, suddenly unsure of myself and the feelings that were evoked from my current line of thinking.

"What if that doesn't fix your obsession?" Jasper quietly finished for me, edging around my real question.

I meekly nodded, staring at the floor.

"You owe it to yourself to find out, Edward. I don't know if you realize this, but when you talked about this girl, your face became more animated than I've ever seen it. I think you were actually….well, glowing."

"I was?" That didn't seem possible. I admit, I felt light-hearted and somewhat giddy when I talked about her, but glowing?

"Yes, you were."

"Okay, I should find her. But how? I don't know anything about her."

Jasper contemplated this for awhile, doing that doctor-thing where they stroke their chin and say 'hmm' a lot. He stopped and looked at me, inspiration brightening his eyes. "Have you thought about checking the English faculty and staff webpage? There are pictures posted for every person in the English department. That would at least, narrow down your search."

A surge of pure elation overtook me. I jumped up, grinning wildly, and pointed at Jasper. "You, sir, are brilliant! I would hug you, but we're guys."

Jasper laughed, delighted in my obvious happiness.

"Thank you, for everything," I emphasized. "I have some pictures to look at, and I will see you tomorrow for lunch, right?"

Jasper nodded, "Good luck."

"Thanks," I said over my shoulder, heading for the front door.

I will find you, mystery girl, I promised myself as I half-walked, half-ran to my car.