Chapter 3: I Broke Him

2 weeks. It's been two weeks. Two long horrid weeks. And two weeks way too long without him. I haven't talked to him, I haven't heard from him or even seen him since that day. We haven't been this long without each other since before we even knew each other.

I remember the first day we met like it was yesterday. We had this weird yet amazing connection ever since my blue orbs met his brown ones. It was like best friends at first sight. I was the new girl in town and I had no friends whatsoever. I moved from Tennessee so I had this weird country accent and the only time anyone talked to me was to imitate me or call me a dirty poor hillbilly. Nice, I know. But Shane, he was weird too and he lived there his whole life.

He was the outcast in school, he had no friends. I could never really understand why no one liked him. He was a really cute kid along with an amazing personality and was extremely funny. Talking to him for five minutes could cheer up a whole bad day and my frowns and sad tears would turn to tears from laughing so hard I couldn't breathe. Whenever we hung out my smile never ever left my face and I always felt so comfortable with him. I could tell him everything and anything and he wouldn't judge me or hate me for it. I was never really close to anyone before him and kept my feelings to myself. He was like that himself too. But with each other we just opened up and we trusted each other.

After a few weeks of being his friend I realized the thing that set him apart from everybody else in our school. He loved music. He was like a little future musician at 11 years old. He could play the piano, drums, and guitar. It was so amazing and I was fascinated. I thought it was amazing and honestly so cool, but the kids at school? They thought differently. I guess that's how we kind connected. I loved to sing, I was singing since I could talk. I knew a little guitar but he taught me all I know today. It was such a crazy cool connection we had; me and my singing and him and his instruments. We had this common thing that although set us apart from the rest of the kids it made us closer and the best of friends. It was the love we shared.

There are so many more things than just music that made us best friends. He's the only person in the world who understands me and is always there to listen to me. I mean I could talk to him about basically everything and anything like I said before. He sometimes even knows something before I even say it or knows what I'm feeling before I even feel it. It's insane.

Without him in my life I'm not complete. I'm not me. Half of me is missing. I have this empty feeling inside of me pleading to be fulfilled once again. I know exactly what I need to do. I need to go see him, apologize for everything I did to hurt him and make amends. I need to set things right again and get my best friend back no matter what it takes.

The only thing standing in my way was fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of him not wanting to see me. Fear of him not wanting to talk to me. Fear of him screaming at me to get out of his sight. But most of all fear that he doesn't want me back in his life; he doesn't want to be my best friend again.

It was five o' clock and I was walking across our street. I finally mustered up the courage. I know this has to be done. I mean at least if he doesn't want to be friend I still will get to see him one last time. The best friend I ever had.

The sky was getting dark already which probably meant it was going to rain. I was secretly hoping this wasn't a sign from God saying that this wasn't going to turn out too great. I walked a little faster so I could talk to him and get home before it started to pour. I finally reached my destination and knocked on the door, something I wasn't really used to doing. I usually just walked right in; it was like my second home. But under these recent circumstances I thought knocking would be a better idea and less awkward. I knocked three times and still there was no answer, strange. I know his mom works late and his older brother is never home because he's always too busy partying 24/7 but at least he should be home. His car was in the driveway. Thinking that he was probably blasting music up in his room I climbed up the vines to his room. I always did this when I needed someone to talk to or just wanted to see him. It was our little secret route. It's a wonder his parents never figured it out.

As I was climbing up the vines I couldn't help but think about how I climbed these so many times before. Whenever I needed to talk to him late at night. Whenever I needed ears to listen and shoulders to lean on. Whenever I just needed my best friend. He was always there, always has been and a part of me still feels he always will. But honestly I'm not quite sure anymore and that scared me more than anything. I really need him.

I peeked through his window and saw him, which alone brought a smile to my face. It felt so good to see him, I felt so much better already. His face was in his hands. What in the world was he doing? I was just about to tap on his window to get his attention when he released his hands from his face and sat up. Was he crying? His eyes were red and swollen, tears falling freely down his cheeks.

That happy-alive feeling completely dropped, I felt even worse than before. But then again this was the perfect time. I needed to go in there and comfort him. Lend my shoulder and ears like he has done so many times for me. I need to find the source hurting my best friend and fix it.

Then I saw it. The thing destroying my best friend's always happy-go-lucky attitude. The thing tearing his huge shining smile right off his face. It was "us" or more like what we used to be. He was holding a picture of the two of us.

It was the picture I made him take with me at the mall. I wanted to get a Christmas picture taken just for the fun of it. After much wining he finally caved in. I made us wear matching red sweaters. It was one of my favorite pictures. In the picture he looked so happy and alive. His eyes were the beautiful chocolate brown I haven't witnessed in awhile since they're always so bloodshot and swollen nowadays. His grin was so wide his dimples were showing, I really miss that smile.

This is my entire fault. Everything. I've completely and utterly destroyed my best friend. I broke him.