AN: Geez, is it March already? Before I know it, it will be 2010! Another angst-filled chapter for your enjoyment (or not, as the case may be). This fic has a small, but loyal following and I thank you for that! This one is also the story that my muse seems most interested in, lately. I can already see a number of different scenes in my head. I hope you continue to stay tuned, because there are interesting times up ahead.

Review replies:

Horselvr4evr123: Thanks very much for the encouragement! This chapter will likely add to the confusion, though :p

Fairyfae: I'm glad you're enjoying my twisted plot. I couldn't leave Maes dead. He's such a wonderful character!

Ed lay strapped to the hospital bed and tried to summon sleep to take him away from what felt like a waking nightmare. But his brain refused to rest and seemed to keep circling around everything that he'd heard and experienced since he came here. He was in Amestris. He truly believed that now. Though his automail arm was unresponsive, he'd still managed to perform alchemy earlier by touching his flesh hand to the dead metal arm. But, somehow, Al was here - and Hughes was alive, and Armstrong was dead, and Roy… Ed's chest tightened painfully and hot tears leaked out from beneath his closed eyelids. Roy had pushed him away in surprise and wiped Ed's kiss away as if it revolted him. His fear that Roy was Envy in disguise had faded after talking to Hughes. So what else could explain Roy's odd behavior?

It had been so many years... Did Roy blame him for leaving the second time when he returned to Earth with Al to close the portal on their side? Or had Roy forgotten those few precious months they had spent together before Roy had gone to fight Pride and Ed had gone to retrieve his brother from the other homunculi – memories that had kept Ed's hope alive all these years? Ed struggled against the wave of anguish that washed over him. He could still feel the recent warmth of Roy's skin, smell his scent, and taste Roy on his lips. Memories of their time together from ten years ago came flooding back through him.

"Edward," Roy breathed in that husky, urgent voice that always sent a thrill down Ed's spine. Roy's hands around Ed's chest pressed their sweaty, panting bodies together as if he were trying to mold them in to a single being.

Ed leaned forward on to his knees, arched his back and turned his head and shoulders so he could press his lips to the man's behind him. The handsome pale face above Ed was flushed from exertion, the midnight blue eyes looked black from the combination of dilated pupils and lowered eyelids, and the fine black hair clung damply to Roy's forehead.

Ed's hands were clenched into trembling fists and rested on top of his own thighs where they stretched wide across Roy's lap. Ed groaned in pleasure and exhaustion into their shared kiss and felt Roy's lips shape his characteristic smirk. Ed pulled away from the kiss and glared at his lover. "What's that smirk for, Bastard?"

Roy leaned back and to the side so Ed couldn't see him well. He brushed his lips lightly across Ed's flesh shoulder. "I still can't believe this is real," Roy said quietly. He gently lifted Ed's loose golden mane of hair and ran his tongue over the base of Ed's neck. "That you and I are doing this." Roy thrust his hips up into Ed as a reminder of what they had so recently done and Ed gasped at the surge of sensation against his already oversensitive body."And doing it quite well, I might add."

"If I knew you were a smirking bastard even during sex I would have reconsidered," Ed grumbled, shifting his position to pull off of Roy and away from the arms around him.

"No you wouldn't. You love this, Ed. Admit it." Roy pressed his lips to Ed's neck, just above the automail join, kissing and nipping a warm, wet trail up to Ed's ear. His warm breath tickled Ed's ear and the side of his face.

"I love you," Ed whispered and gasped in surprise and then covered his own mouth with his flesh hand, humiliated that he had finally said the words and frightened about how Roy would react.

Roy's hand came up to Ed's jaw, gently removed Ed's hand from his face and turned him enough for their lips to meet again.

Edward choked back a sob when grim realization hit him. For ten years, this and other few precious memories had kept Ed looking for some way, any way to get back to the man he thought had loved him. But Roy had never said it. He had never said he loved Ed - not once in all those times they were entangled in each other's arms. How could Ed have been so blind? All this time, he had been living with the delusion that he had meant so much more to Roy than a moment of passing pleasure. He had risked everything to come back here and be with Roy again. And for what? Some juvenile fucking fairy tale, apparently! Ed's flesh hand tightened into a fist and he twisted and pulled at the leather restraints until they cut into his flesh, the pain in his arm a welcome distraction from the emptiness inside him.

Riza glanced over at her husband. Roy sat on the edge of their bed, the fingers of one hand pressed to his lips, a frown creasing his forehead. He had gotten distracted just getting out of his clothes, his shirt pulled out of his slacks and half un-buttoned. She hadn't seen him this worried in some time.

"What is it, Roy?" she asked quietly. "The doctor did say Edward took a blow to the head. I'm sure between Hughes and the doctors they will sort this out." She sat down next to him and placed a hand on his thigh. "Or do you think that's not really Ed?"

Roy looked up at her with the same dazed, faraway look in his eyes. He lowered his hand and shook his head, looking out the window. "It's Fullmetal," he said without hesitation.

Riza's fingers traced patterns in the material of Roy's slacks. "If he was being held by kidnappers, they might have hurt him… even damaged his mind."

Roy nodded vaguely, but she could tell he wasn't really listening.

Riza moved her hand up to Roy's face, directed his gaze at her. "Talk to me, Roy."

His dark eyes searched her face as if trying to gauge her reaction before he decided what to say. She was reminded of another recent and uncomfortable discussion they had had. After all these years, she had thought she knew her husband. She had spent more than half her life beside him, supporting him, watching his back. But his recent revelations to her had led her to believe that Roy still had some dark secrets hidden away, things she would never have guessed or expected. "Was there something – between you and Ed – before he left?"

"What?" Roy hissed out, eyes opening wide in surprise. "Why would you even ask that?" Roy stood up from the bed and walked away from her. "Shit, Riza! What kind of a pervert do you think I'm am?! Ed was just a kid when he disappeared!"

"I'm sorry – it's just that…"

He turned on her angrily from his spot in front of the window. "This is about Hughes again, isn't it?"

She hung her head, unwilling to look him in the eyes. "I just thought –"

"What? That if I fucked Hughes when we were at the Academy that I'd go after Ed, too? I may be bisexual, Riza, but that doesn't make me a pedophile!"

"Roy, I –"

"Dammit! You make me wish I never told you!"

"But I'm glad you told me!"

"Yet you refuse to forgive me, is that it?"

"I already told you I forgive you, Roy."

"Words, Riza. You said it, but you didn't mean it, or you wouldn't keep bringing it up every time I turn around!"

"Roy, I'm sorry!"

Roy snorted in disgust, tucked his shirt back in and headed toward the bedroom door.

Riza jumped up off the bed and took several steps toward him. "Where are you going?" she pleaded.

"I need a drink," he said, without looking back at her. He opened the door and shut it behind him without another word.

Riza dropped back onto their bed, hands fisted in her lap. She wished she could take it back, what she'd said. But now that she knew there had been more between Roy and Maes than she ever imagined, she couldn't stop watching the two of them together. When had they crossed the line between friends and lovers? Despite Roy's protests to the contrary, she wondered if they were still lovers – meeting in secret. It made her question every other male relationship Roy had. And she couldn't help wondering just how close he had gotten to the young blond alchemist.

Roy didn't know why they bothered to fill a crystal decanter with liquor for him. He was content pouring it straight from the bottle to his glass. It was more efficient his way and didn't generate extra glassware that needed cleaning. Besides, with the way things had been going lately, Roy had been down here repeating this scenario more times than he cared to think about.

The golden liquid had a familiar bite and sent a warming flush through his body. He swirled the contents of the glass in the light from the fireplace. The flames reminded him of Ishbal and he could almost hear the screams of the dying. He had so many regrets. Watching Edward leave for Liore was definitely one of them. But had he been sending mixed signals to the teen? Did the boy have reason to think that Roy had felt anything more than parental affection toward him? Roy shook his head in confusion and rubbed a hand over his face.

He heard a knock at his study door and expected it was one of the servants who helped keep the presidential mansion full of crystal liquor decanters, among other things. "Come in," Roy called over his shoulder, not really interested. He knew these people were aware of how much he drank and how often he slept somewhere other than his own bed. It made him long for the days of being a footloose Colonel, although they hadn't felt footloose at the time. 'Be careful what you wish for,' the old adage said. Roy couldn't agree more.

Roy heard the door open and close behind him, then the sound of booted feet on the wooden floor. He glanced up in surprise to see Maes Hughes frowning down at him. "Drinking, again, Roy?"

Roy shrugged, but slumped further down in the leather armchair like a guilty kid. "Your powers of observation are extraordinary. This must be why you're in charge of investigations," he rgumbled sarcastically.

Maes snorted and dropped down in the chair next to Roy. "I assume this means you're arguing with Riza again…"

"Again? Feels like constantly, of late."

"Roy –"

"Don't start with me, Maes. You didn't come here to give me marriage counseling and I don't need a lecture from the guy who didn't have the balls to tell his own wife that he screwed his best friend years ago!"

Maes' green eyes went cold and his expression hardened.

Roy looked away, unable to meet Hughes look. "Why did you come here anyway?"

"Edward Elric."

Roy sighed and his hand brushed lightly across his lips before he frowned at himself and took a large swallow of whiskey. "What did you find out?"

"What do you know about the Gate?"

Roy's eyes widened in surprise and he looked at Hughes. The other man's face was completely serious. "Not much, really," he admitted. "Al seems to know the most about it. Ed's former teacher was also familiar with it. Apparently, you only see it if you attempt human transmutation…"

"What's beyond the Gate?"

Roy shook his head. I don't know. Grasping black hands, a strange being, a thousand gleaming eyes, the Truth, heaven, hell… I don't know, Maes. Why?"

"Because this young man claims to have been in another world beyond the gate."

Roy scoffed. "That's impossible. Ridiculous." Roy took another drink of whiskey to brace himself against a sudden chill that ran down his spine.

"At this point, we either have to accept that these things could be real, or resign ourselves to the fact that this could be Edward Elric, but whatever happened to him after Liore has driven him completely insane."

The glass slipped from Roy's numb fingers and shattered on the floor.