Disclaimer: Me? Nope! Never own this even after all the grueling attempts at writing the worst and best possible possibilities of what the future characters have been doing other than trapped in some un-ending time loops.

10/10/08 Note: Finally my writer's block is gone! The next two chapters are in progress and if nothing goes wrong, I'll up-date the newest chapter next week. Maybe on Monday or Tuesday. I noticed that so many people read this fic. I was just hoping that you guys give me some feedback. It's important, you know. Else I don't know whether people want me to continue this or not. -sigh-. Anyways, please be patient and I'll work fast so you can read the next chapter. Still busy with my movie script. PS: I've updated the edited version of the first four chapters. Fixed the grammars and some plot errors.

Chapter 7 Lost in another Past Memory

It was the night of day two after they arrived in Dino Cavallone's secret clinic. While their patron was still busy contacting all the help they could afford, the four adults and two teens were discussing about how the man they loved most died.

"… and that's when a sniper shot his left side, from the back. The bullet hits his heart and he…" Gokudera couldn't continue his sentence. He cast a concerned look towards the young woman sitting on the bed while his wife held her hands tight.

"Kyoko-chan…" Haru looked at her best friend's empty eyes. No tears. No anger. Nothing at all.

"I know you're shocked with this, Sasagawa," Yamamoto said to Kyoko. "But you saw Tsuna's younger self with your own eyes, right? He'll do something about this whole mess."

"Will Tsu-kun be alive if we come back to our own time, then?" Kyoko turned her attention to Gokudera. He gulped down another glass of water before meeting Kyoko's light brown eyes. He could see the small hope glittering in the beautiful eyes his Boss had always adored.

"We don't know, Kyoko," he answered. "We don't know what will happen to our future if the younger Tenth is able to stop all of this. Maybe the Boss of our time will live, and maybe he will not."

"It was just like what we have told you about the time paradox earlier," Yamamoto patted Kyoko's shoulder. "Everything was just as blurry as the mist. We'll know once we return to our own time."

Kyoko sat still like a statue with her eyes fixed on her hands. The glitter of the engagement ring reflected in her eyes. Haru couldn't help but hug her. Gokudera moved to the window and sat on the edge just like the night before.

"We've told you everything you need to know," Yamamoto said suddenly after a few minutes of silence. "Dino-san is still trying his best to help us. So I need both of you to stay here in the clinic whatever happens, okay? We can't risk changing anything. Lambo and I-pin will protect both of you."

The two young women nodded silently. After that, Kyoko fell asleep again and Yamamoto left the room to retire to his own room. He wasn't sleeping the night before at all. Lambo and I-pin soon retired to their own rooms too.

Gokudera kept silent and just watched the half-moon shining in the sky. At times like this, he would usually have already smoked one full packet of cigarettes. But as Haru told him the night before, he couldn't smoke inside a hospital and he had promised her to lessen his cigarettes intake too.

"Why don't you go and sleep, Haru?" he said suddenly without turning his back.

Haru looked at her husband's figure. She could see the longing and sadness in his eyes. She moved to stood behind him.

"I don't want to leave you here," she told him. She hugged him from behind and rested her head on his shoulder. "You can cry if you want, Hayato. Don't hold back."

Gokudera didn't respond and kept quiet. He put his hands on hers. He traced the small silver ring in her left hand and looked at his own red ruby. "I can't protect him, Haru," he muttered silently. "Kyoko lost her fiancée because of me. Vongola lost their Godfather because of me. Lambo, I-pin and Fuuta lost their big brother because of me. Iemitsu and his wife lost their one and only son because of me. Yamamoto and Ryohei lost their little brother because of me. Hibari lost his sparring partner because of me. All of you lost your only hope because of me."

Haru tightened her hug when his back started to shake heavily. She held back her own tears. "It's not your fault…" she whispered to him.

"I… I couldn't protect him, Haru. I let him die..." He kept on muttering not realizing the tears wetting his handsome face. "He's dead and I didn't do anything to prevent it."

"It's not your fault…" Her cracked voice betrayed her efforts to calm her husband.

"I shouldn't have let him and Reborn-san got out from the underground base. I should've understood his orders sooner. I shouldn't have let Hibari cut off the communication links after he left for Italy. He should've known about the Non-Tre ni Sette Radiation. I shouldn't have let all of this happened…" He turned away from the moon and looked at his wife tearful face. "I shouldn't have let him died, Haru… I shouldn't…"

Both of them stared at each other's watery eyes. Both of them understand the reasons. He couldn't hold back the deep sadness he had been hiding ever since his beloved Boss died anymore. She could feel his sadness and share his grief, for she once had special feeling towards their deceased best friend.

Before he could mutter another sentence of regret, she turned his body to face her and buried her head in his chest. "Don't say anything more, Hayato."

He wrapped his arms around her whole body with his trembling hands. He could smell the faint lavender scent from her short hair. It eased his mind a little bit. He buried his head in her hair. His silent cry joined her small sobs.

Then suddenly, a strong wind blew into the room. He wished the wind could blow away all of his and his wife's sadness and guilt too.

--

Yamamoto sighed as he heard the muffled sobs from the room below his. He didn't mean to eavesdrop on the newlywed's conversation. He just wanted to close the window when Gokudera started his laments.

He had been wondering why Gokudera never showed any kind of emotion after Tsuna and Reborn died. He could only notice the small sadness whenever Gokudera talked about their deceased Boss and best friend. He never knew that he had been holding back all his sadness and guilt.

He leaned down the window pane and looked up to the glowing half-moon in the dark sky. He couldn't see any stars because of the massive clouds covering Namimori's sky. It looked like there's going to be a downpour after tonight. He knew because he could smell the faint scent of rain from far away.

He glanced at the sword on the table beside the window. The two swallows carved on the sword hilt reminded him of his deceased father. The Shigure Souen Ryuu master died in the hands of some unknown Millefiore's assassins.

He remembered just a day after Tsuna had died, he was going to retrieve his father and hide him in Vongola underground base. When he reached his old man's house, the only thing he found was a destroyed sushi shop, broken sword and a dead body covered with slash wounds. His world crumbled all over again when he saw his old man's dead face.

Once again, he lost the person he cherished. The first was Tsuna and the little guy. Now, he lost his father. His one and only father. His father who had been raising him single-handedly since his mother died. His father, who had taught him the way of bushido. The father whom he failed to protect.

Twice… His whole world had crumbled down twice.

He thought that his crumbled world would return to what it was when younger Tsuna and Gokudera appeared. Maybe they could change the past. Maybe if they found out what the Millefiore had been doing, Tsuna, the little guy and his father will be alive.

But then he remembered what Lambo had told them: the time inconsistency, the parallel worlds and the time paradox. He realized that his faint hope was shattered the moment he heard the explanation again this morning. He didn't know what would happen to them anymore. He could only wear the laid-back and naïve swordsman mask he was known for. He couldn't let the women and the teenagers see his vulnerability. He has to stay strong for them.

A small twitch of fake smile covered his face as he looked at the blue sapphire stone on his left hand.

Slowly, droplets of water fell from the night sky. The muffled sobs stopped and he could hear Gokudera told Haru to rest in their room and let him taking care of Kyoko for the night. The window of the room below his was closed.

He breathed in the smell of rain and let the raindrops hit his face. He wished the rain would wash away all of his unshed tears and untold grief.

--

"You heard Gokudera-san, Lambo. The Non-Tre ni Sette Radiation must have affect my master too! You know my master is an Arcobaleno!"

"But, I-pin, we didn't know which Arcobaleno have died from the radiation! There's a possibility your master's still alive!"

"But what if he isn't? How do we know he is alive?"

Lambo shook his head. He really couldn't stand I-pin's over-reaction. He thought that she would be able to think with cold head just like she usually did. But apparently she couldn't if the main topic included her beloved Gyoza-ken Master.

"We'll know once everything returns to what it was."

"And how is that?"

"I don't know! We can't do anything until we return to our time!" he shouted at his childhood friend.

I-pin was taken aback by this and kept silent for a moment. Then she glared menacingly at Lambo. "You should know. You've owned that Bazooka all your life," she hissed.

Lambo huffed and rubbed his temple. "Just say whatever you want! I want to sleep!"

"FINE!"

Lambo walked out of I-pin's room as quickly as possible. He banged the door closed and walked into his room which was just beside I-pin's.

He halted in the middle of the room when he saw a flash of light came from outside the window followed by a loud rumble. He approached the small window and opened it. The small drizzle of rain fell from the night sky and it wet his hands.

He sighed and sat on the window's ledge. He let the rainwater hit his whole body and wetting the floor. The Cavallone Boss' housekeeping staff could clean it. He just wanted to feel the coldness of rain and hear the loud rumble of thunder.

The cold rainwater could cool his anger towards I-pin and the loud rumbling could ease his head-ache.

Thinking about his head-ache, he was reminded of the conversations with the Bovino Boss later after the confusing discussion with the adults.

His former Boss was really angry when he knew it was the sixteen year old Lambo who had called him. The Bovino Boss literally screamed at him: How dare you call me, Lambo! Don't you know something bad could happen if you, from the future, do something like this? I never knew you're such an irresponsible brat even after you became the Thunder Guardian for the Vongola! You've ashamed me and the Bovino Famiglia!!

Lambo had let his Boss from Bovino Famiglia rattle on and on about responsibility and the time paradox until the old man realized that he had been talking to older Lambo for more than five minutes. Lambo explained to him briefly about what have happened and he calmed down and Lambo told him the Cavallone Tenth Boss need to talk to him immediately.

After the long talk, the Cavallone Boss gave the phone back to Lambo and said his Boss wanted to talk to him. The Bovino Boss told him he was proud of Lambo for he was the one explaining the time theories to the Cavallone Boss and that he promised to do everything he could to help Lambo and his fellow Guardians back to their proper time. He also said that he would never let Lambo trapped in time paradox.

Before the line was cut off, the Bovino Boss added that all members of Bovino Mafia Famiglia missed Lambo and hoped that when he returned to the future, he'll visit them in Italy.

The rain fell harder on his face. It looked like there'll be a heavy downpour tonight. He glanced at the green emerald ring in his right hand. The ring Tsuna had given him when he asked for the Vongola Ring of Thunder to be destroyed.

He held back his tears when the memories of the time Tsuna had babysat him since he was young resurfaced. He remembered how Tsuna always obliged to whatever he asked for but as the years passed, Tsuna learned not to let Lambo lord over him. He was the Tenth Vongola Boss and he couldn't risk losing his dignity over one child's every whim.

When the memories of when Fuuta took over the task of babysitting him since Tsuna was too busy after he became the official Vongola Boss, resurfaced too, he couldn't held back his tears anymore. Other than Tsuna and Gokudera-shi, Fuuta was the only person Lambo looked up to.

He looked up to Tsuna, because he was like a big brother. He looked up to Gokudera-shi because even though he always mad at him, deep down inside he cared about Lambo's well being. He looked up to Fuuta because he wasn't just a babysitter to him. He stopped babysitting him when Lambo turned thirteen. Fuuta was a guardian, tutor, big brother and everything for Lambo.

But Tsuna was dead. Gokudera-shi had so many things on his hands at the moment and he's just married to Haru-san too. And Fuuta… Fuuta was far in the future while Lambo's in the past. He had nobody to help him anymore. Lambo pulled up his legs to his chest and buried his head in his arms.

The small sobs were unheard because of the loud thunder rumbling outside in the night sky of Namimori. He wished the lightning could strike him and make him forget all of his loneliness.

--

The three Guardians of Vongola couldn't sleep that night. The fierce wind was blowing fast and the heavy rain pouring hard while the harsh lightning striking everything in its path.

Author's Note (never skip this one!!):

Did I make anyone cry? Tell me if I did and tell me if I didn't. I cried when I wrote this. I didn't know what's gotten into me. I write this chapter so you can take a look at how these three Guardians take on their own loses. In the middle of writing this I thought: This one should be a separate one-shot, instead of the continuation of the series, it's already two angst chapters back to back.

Hibari and Non-Tre ni Sette Radiation: Gokudera thought that maybe Hibari knew something about the Radiation because he's investigating the Arcobaleno and the Millefiore. It's possible that Hibari knew something about the technology Millefiore have created.

Yamamoto Tsuyoshi, rest in peace: Seriously, I reaaaallllllyyyyy didn't know how he died. The most speculative theory I came up with before I wrote this fanfic was Yamamoto Sr. was the spokesman chosen to sit in the negotiation with Millefiore. But I didn't write that, of course. That would mean I dig my own grave. I'll have so many, many, MANY things to be explained! I settled for the easiest but not cool way of killing him. (Sorry Yamamoto Sr.). Maybe I'll write the details some time in the future.

Babysitter Tsuna, Gokudera and Fuuta: TYL!Fuuta said it himself in Target 157 to younger Lambo that he was the one in charge of him until three years prior. TYL!Lambo respects Tsuna and Gokudera, of course! If someone was taking care of you for almost your whole life (even if one was used to be a No-Good and the other always mad at you, throwing dynamites at you and scolding you), you'll respect them too.

I wonder what I should write for the next chapter. I already have one idea in mind but couldn't decide whether to write it down or not. It will have something to do with the Intermission chapter. Because I'm still thinking about it, there'll be no preview this time. Sorry…

I kind of got tired of waiting for the manga. Why couldn't they release the chapters daily?! (Akira Amano would be dead if they did…)

And, another note…

As many of you should have known, I've published another two series. One was entitled Dearly Beloved. It contained the songfic story I write when I was listening to some random songs. The ideas just popping out!! Can't help it! XD Ehem… Back to the explanation. I've already uploaded two tracks. This songfic collection contains only HET pairings. Because my fanfictions were mostly about GokuxHaru, I decided to write something different. And I don't want people to think that I can only write about GokuxHaru. Heh! My writing skills (and talents) are not as limited as that, fortunately. XP

The other was entitled Twenty Roads to Eternity. It was actually a collection of twenty drabbles I wrote while writing the continuation of this one and the other one-shots about Gokudera and Haru. Only two parts (ten drabbles) were uploaded. I haven't finished with the remaining five roads. So up-dates will still be far in the horizon. XP

The holiday's almost over in here. And my lecturers have started to pester me with all the tasks of helping the new student adapt in campus. This is cliché, I know, but updates will not be as fast as it used to anymore. I have three ongoing stories, couple of one-shots waiting to be written, and campus' beginning again. Need to sort out my priorities… T-T

I just want all of you to be patient because I will never abandon my unfinished works. Only if… you, my readers, give me more reviews. I always happy to see many people clicked my stories (grand total of 3000+ hits and 3000+ visitors as of this!!) but so few had given me their reviews. Reviews are my source of life and ideas. I'll always wait for your comment, people!!

Thank you very much for those who were still kind enough to give me their reviews. I always smile when I saw someone write me one. 8D

17/09/08 EDIT: Err... Just want to add some notes for some things in this chapter. One of my reviewer said that Lambo's age supposed to be twelve when Fuuta stopped babysitting him. How to explain this... hmm... You see, according to Vongola 77 Character Book, where there's a timeline about all the events in the manga, it's been almost one year and three months after Lambo arrived in the Sawada household until the TYL Arc's started. Lambo's a May baby. If he was five when Tsuna took him in, the TYL Arc happened on October, that's mean he would be six years old when he switched with future Lambo. How old is future Lambo? If his younger self was six, that means he was sixteen. TYLFuuta said that he stopped babysitting Lambo three years prior, that made him thirteen then.

I hope this explains the matemathics problems. If you have any other things you think was not right, please don't hesitate to tell me. That's the function of giving a review, you know.