Me: Hi Everybody, don't know you, the Reader Version 1.5, would like this since I think that my mind was a bit off while writing this chappie. I was a bit off due to my grades being not what my parents and I expected.
Natsume: Yeah, that's right. It's not like you're a prodigy genius like me. (smirks)
Me: (Begins to have teary eyes) Waah Natsume no Baka! Mikan! Natsume is bullying again!
Mikan: ( From afar) Supah Starlight-o Kick! (kicks a can which directly hits Natsume's head.) Stupid Natsume! Doesn't know a girls heart for goodness sake.
Natsume: What? Geez, that girl's not even normal! Thinking all sorts of evil deeds about me. She even wrote an embarrassing moment between me and Ruka!
Me: Sniff, all I can say is. . . I am a failure in my own native language. Waah! (cries again) But please, don't let my gloominess stop you from reading my fic. Please enjoy.
Disclaimer: Repeat every word the sentence says please: I. . . Sniff. . . Don't . . . Sniff. . . Own. . . Ga—ku—en. . . Alice. . . Sniff. . . Waah!
Author's Note: For those that have reviewed my fanfic, Arrigatou Gosaimasu. And toNapris: I haven't really thought of the fic like that. I actually haven't seen Chobits before because I didn't really like the boy gommen. He wasn't a BISHOUNEN! No! I like to torture cute boys!
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Natsume's POV
Chapter 3: The Reason
" Hey Natsume! I know that it's damn early but I had to come here you know just to check up on you!" the voice from the broken door ordered. "and what's with the broken door?!"
I knew that this was a critical situation because of the Polka Dotted Girl who was still inside the shower. I needed to keep her a secret because if more people knew of a girl living with me, a loner and bad boy hottie, the RabidFan Girls would ravage her. Not that I would be concerned of but please, I don't want them to have my name in their cruel ceremony of those that have touched their beloved idol and love, Natsume-kun, must die!
" Hey! If you're still asleep then WAKE UP already Natsume! I can't come in even if the door is breaking into pieces unless you tell me to."
At least he had the decency to realize that entering without permission would be trespassing . . . unlike some hags. . . oops. . . I mean people." Geez, you're really impatient. Hold your horses I'm coming!" I can't believe I actually said the horse-thing . . . so uncool.
Before I was up to my feet, I had already devised several plans of escaping the sad fate if she were to be discovered:
A. Tell that person she was my long lost brother's ex-wife who came to me to find sanctuary because of his cruel intentions and plans to send her to train to be a better wife in a strip joint. ( cough cough)
B. She's my long lost third cousin from my grandfather's oldest brother's side who was twice removed who came here in Tokyo for an unknown visit without me knowing anything at all because I only knew her through internet.
C. She was a pigtailed monkey alien girl from outer space whose flying banana shaped spaceship crashed landed into my room and now she wants to talk to the emperor of the Japan who she thinks is me and negotiate for World Peace and Harmony for the whole entire universe.
D. She was the mysterious black thief PD-Siren (Polka Dotted-Siren) who was currently holding me hostage due to my striking looks and resemblance to her 3rd ex-boyfriend and now she is plotting revenge because of him breaking up with her by having me as her slave in my own room
E. I don't know her; or
F. Just don't let the person inside the room at all cost. Tell the person that the room is infested with mice and termites and locusts and ghosts and bananas and monkeys and. . .
SLAP!
I needed that mental slap. Just don't let him in at all cost and that's all. Although Choice C is a very convincing statement since her face does resemble that of an alien monkey girl from outer space. . .
" Natsume—!"
" You're really troublesome, Ruka. You know what time of the day it is?" I yawned while opening the broken door, trying to make this façade of sleepiness believable to the only real best friend I knew here in Tokyo. I unconsciously pushed us to the outside of my room with one objective in my mind: DON'T LET HIM IN. DON'T LET HIM IN. DON'T LET HIM INNNNNN. . .
" I know it's early but you know the drill. I give you your breakfast for the day, help you clean up this mess you call your room, wait till it's lunch and eat lunch at the mall, try to help you familiarize with Tokyo since you're new here and—"
" Let me guess. . . FanGirls at your dorm." It was more of a statement than a guess.
" Yup." He stated in the obvious groan of irritation. His name: Ruka Nogi. Age: Same as me. Status: Second hottest boy in Tokyo and only person able to be with the well-known hottie/loner, Natsume Hyuuga and not get scared of. " But now, they were holding up poster size illegal pictures of ME PETTING MY ANIMAL FRIENDS!"
Oh and one more thing about Ruka, he is an animal lover, no, no, I should rephrase my sentence. More like: One Who Adores All Sorts of Animals Whether be it Small, Big, or Dangerous because For Him They Are All God's Creation and Are To Be Treated as Friends and Equals And Such. . . (And the Animals Adore Him Too)
Yup, there's such a long list to describe the true nature of the supposed cool and stoic faced Ruka Nogi but that was the shortest that I could think of as of the moment.
" Nah, probably the handy-work of Imai." I shrugged it off. It became a regular basis to see the two quarrelling and bickering over illegally taken pictures of Ruka and of me and selling them in school and in the black-market but unlike my friend over here, I wasn't that conscious of other people looking at my awesome physique. My feelings toward other people were frozen a long time ago. . .
" Don't just stand there and say 'Nah'! Natsume, it's about my most embarrassing secrets about to be revealed to the FanGirls because of HER! She even has a shot of me and Piyo!"
Ouch, that's gotta hurt. Piyo was our class' pet chick. He was one of the cutest creatures ever to set foot in the whole entire school. That was what I heard from the FanGirls but who would ever believe in their exaggerated stories?( Gomen, Feels like I'm Insulting all of Race- The Race of Blood Thirsty FanGirls) Certainly not me; Heck, I'm a boy for Pete's sake! How can I understand a woman's feelings anyhow?
" Hey," I reached to hold both sides of his shoulders, giving him the hardest bone-crushing grip I could give.
" Itai Natsume!" he cringed in pain but he could do nothing because my strength surpassed his. I smirked inwardly at his helplessness. " Natsume let go!" he ordered at me but I didn't respond.
" I'm sorry. . ." I whispered, underneath the bush of raven haired bangs that covered my crimson orbs I stared at his awestruck and flushed face.
" Wh—Wha—" he began to stutter. Heh, now's my chance. . .
" I'm sorry Ruka but there's nothing I can do for you."
Click. . .
Click. . .
Click. . .
DING!
" DON'T YOU DARE DO THOSE DOCTOR WHACCHA-MA-CALL-IT SOAP OPERAS ON ME AGAIN!!!" he shouted while I smirked at his flushed out of anger face. My insides were in knots full of laughter from watching but I still had to contain it. I still have to be cool no matter how funny I can torture other people ya know. (smirk)
The steam from inside my blonde companion's head finally went out after several minutes of non-stop shouting. " There's nothing I can do about this side of you Natsume—" he sighed. "Let's just get inside your room and I'll reheat these Dashimaki Tamago, and Mitarashi Dango for you."
" But those are for kids." I whined. Really, I hate being treated like a kid. I would punch that person to bits if he calls me a kid just because I was 15 going on 16. Ruka was the only exemption since he is my only 'friend' in Tokyo. "What about you?"
" Oshizushi" he winked playfully.
" That's cruel and unusual punishment Ruka." He knew that it was one of my favorite dishes. . . Oh the torture.
" It's just equivalent trade. You tease me. . . I torture you more. Oh, do you have the stove installed in you room yet maybe we can reheat the food since I cooked it an hour ago."
"Oh crap."
" Oh. . . crap. . .?" he questioned.
Yeah, I really meant that 'Oh crap' thing since I just remembered the Polka Dotted Nuisance inside of my room and the reason why we were outside and not inside, enjoying the freshly re-cooked Oshizushi in the first place.
" Yeah, I just saw flying crap into the food." Ugh, what a worthless and utterly stupid lie. There was even a lid on top of the food!
" Flying. . . crap? Hey don't you blame this on the birds Natsume!" he scolded but I just ignored it. Sigh, sorry Ruka but for the sake of my own dignity and well-being, so that you won't go into a state of shock and for the Earth's Balance to continue to be at peace. . . I MUST.
" Hey. . . HEY! What the Hell are you doing to the food!" I MUST do it. . . no. . . I HAD to do it! I had just dumped the delicious food out onto the outside rails, mind you that my room is located on the 3rd floor of the dormitory. I just had to sob on the inside. Goodbye home-made and delicious cooked food! Goodbye Oshizushi! Sniff.
" Wah, what a waste Natsume, you shouldn't have done that." He sighed. Eh? He shouldn't just sigh. He should be frustrated. . . Angry. Incredible Hulk-ANGRY!
" Luckily I ate my Oshizushi while coming here." Gasp,traitor. "But there should still be some chips for you to eat inside your room. If we can find it that is." He was beginning to move nearer and nearer to the door and his hand was moving closer and closer to the door knob. Crap, I shouldn't be telling how it's happening, I should be acting! I mean stopping him!
" Ruka." I cut him off. " don't, it's kind of messier than usual."
He smiled. "That's why as your friend, I'm here to help you clean up your mess."
" It's full of dust and ants and termites. . ." and alien Monkeys…Geez I wanted to blurt that out! I reasoned the most ordinary reason I could think of at that moment.
" . . ." he paused. "Natsume, this is getting annoying. You're hiding something from me."
" What are you talking about?" this was not good, NOT GOOD at all and all I could do so that I wouldn't give in to his cold stared was to stare at the open space next to Ruka's grayish blue eyes.
" I've been getting suspicious of your actions since you threw out your breakfast earlier. " he then smiled sincerely at me. "Don't try to hide your secrets. You have friends, Natsume."
Friends. What a stupid notion. The only person that I can actually deem as the closest thing to a 'friend' is you Ruka. Everyone else is just an actor, a fake. . . "That's—"
" HYUUGA!!"
" Damn, it's the land hag." I cursed and thanked that for the first time since I moved here, I was glad that the hag was stalking, watching over every move I make and shouting out my name.
" Ruka, this isn't the best time right now so. . ."
"—it's okay" he interrupted. " Just text me if you want company or we can see each other tomorrow at school."
" Tomorrow at school. " I said at ease. It was a relief that he didn't get angry because of what I did.
" Sure." He nodded. "See ya." And he went off on the other side of the building where another flight of stairs was nearby and away from the screaming lunatic.
I peered below to see a puff of smoke slowly coming closer to the top but still s long way to go since she was still on the ground floor, carrying a bag of something on one hand and her crystal ball in the other but. . . "What's that red stuff all over her hair?"
" Who cares." As long as I'm safe from humiliation, I don't freaking care. I was now slowly reaching for the broken door because I knew that the hag would still be climbing long, very long, flights of stairs before reaching my place.
" Oi, Polka—" I stared at her bare back since she was facing away from me (Luckily). She was trying to get her large head through the hole in one of my large shirts. I looked silently downwards . . . from her smooth, milky back to the perfect curves that fitted her medium size body yet still giving cleavage to the thin and delicate arms that were trying to push the shirt down. . . Up from the two little feet to the long legs until the middle of her body which was luckily covered with. . .
" Dots. . ."
" Eh?" She had finished putting on the loose shirt though her huge head.
" Lots and lots of Polka Dots." I stated. My lustful and fiery crimson gazes were now looking down on the now slightly turned butt of Polka Dots. I smirked.
" Natsume no HENTAI! HENTAI! HENTAI!" The word 'hentai' seemed to echo through the space and void. . .
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BAM!
BAM!
WHACK!
I heard my broken door being pummeled, banged, pushed and finally fly though the air and smack right where it first smacked at.
" HYUUGA—ECK. . . " the hag choked.
Great, we were in ANOTHER great position. I was laying flat on my back every body part meaning arms and legs were flat on the floor while Polka was 'riding me'. Of you don't understand me then I will make it CLEARER for you. . . She, meaning the girl POLKA DOTS, was currently sitting on top of me specifically near my lower muscular stomach/ abdomen. Wait, this is GREAT! Now that she'd seen us like this, the old hag. . . I mean she will think that POLKA is the one harassing ME! Yes! Now she will fear the stinging wrath of THE HAG.
Ssssssttttttt. . . . . .
" ICHA—What the HELL!" I quickly flipped to the other side, away from the bronze kettle's hot water and not caring what had happened to Polka.
" Why the hell did you do that for?!" I scowled at the visitor only to see her pampering her.
" Aww poor Mikan-chan, did that poor abusive and stupid excuse for a human being Hyuuga torture you?" the hag continued to pet and comb the long brown locks of the idiot. " That's why you should stay with me and I'll take care of all those bruises on you that I know Hyuuga had inflicted on you."
I stared at her blackly on one corner of my room. "What are you, a pedophile?" Yup, that was an insult and I knew it from the very start.
SMACK!
I caught the flying kettle as I predicted it would happen. I smirked at them to show to her the failed attempt of assassination to my perfect face. I glared at them with a deep, ominous crimson gaze.
" But Mrs. Old Hag, I'm fine here. Really." Polka persuaded as old hag sweat dropped at what she had addresses her.
" M—Mikan—chan, don't . . . That's not my name." hag lady stammered.
" But that's what Natsume-kun calls you."
" Don't' bother listening to what that idiot says. EVER!"
They continued their conversation and they also did something else; something most evil and vile. They were ignoring me. I, Natsume Hyuuga,j was being ignored by two unsexy women. I don't get ignored by other women. . . I IGNORE WOMEN! And I shall NOT stand for this! I needed to devise a plan to get the inhuman girls to shut up, get the hell out of my room and stay out. . .
" Oi" I stared at them, throwing daggers of inaudible curses at them.
" Really Mikan-chan, you can call me Selena-neechan." She hugged her like ther was no tomorrow. And all POLKA could say was " Wai. . . " and she blushed.
" Oi." I was getting irritated.
" Selena-oneechan. Hehe, it sounds nice to have someone say that to you." Weirdo, the old hag was talking to herself." Come on Mikan-chan, let's get away from the bastard and go to the living room downstairs and have te—"
SLAP!
" No! I don't wanna!" huh? That was weird. Polka just slapped the hag's hand. Why? " please don't take me away from Natsume-kun. He is. . . he is. . . " What? WHAATT??? What the hell is this?
" He is someone I have a huge debt with!" she exclaimed.
A blow of icy-cold wind went through us. I imagined a huge sign board above Polka's head that says: 'SOMEONE WITH A HUGE DEBT TO HYUUGA' and above me: THE ONE TO BE PAID (PAYOR)
CRACK!
I gasped. Old hag had just cracked her skull to blow off excess steam due to anger. "HYUUGAAA—HOW COULD YOU!!!"
I'm dead. Really, really dead. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. WHY IS POLKA DOTS SO STUPID IN EXPLAINING THINGS CLEARLY?! No, NO, She's coming this way. She's coming closer and closer. She's grabbing the collar of my SHIRT! She's shaking me! Choking me!!! No! I don't want to die young! I still want to live to become a successful bachelor and to try gambling in Vegas' Casino Royale!
" No! No Selena-neechan, I'm really indebted to Natsume-kun."
" Eh?" we both paused and stared incredously at the blushing Polka because of what she said.
" I. . . I. . . mean to say that. . . I'm grateful that N-natsume-kun saved my life." Her cheeks were glowing a rosy pink as she began to touch the fresh bandages she herself wrapped messily around her wounds. " Really. . . " she began to murmur to herself.
Hmpf. I-D-I-O-T. Did she actually think that I would feel compassion for her just because of what she commented? Ha. . . I-D-I-O-T.
Suddenly, I felt myself be lifted up with a single hand grasping my collar. I looked up to see the most usual thing of the day: Me being lifted and thrown out of my own dorm room. Really, living with a psycho-hag really is like this. 'Daily Life with Hag', they should make a Sitcom for it.
When I felt my butt hit solid ground that was when I return back to my common sense. "What the heck do you think you're—SLAM!" the door that was once found at the edge of my room, was slammed directly at my face.
I began to ponder for a second.
GURRRGLEEE….
My tummy was grumbling. My main priority as of the moment: Find food. I started to walk to the stairs; luckily I had my wallet with me so money wasn't a problem since I was just locked out of my own room. Oh and 2nd priority: buy economy size ramen noodles and coffee just in case. . .
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The day went by with its usual course like every Sunday except I was without Ruka. And without him. . . the fangirls seemed to have quadrupled in number. All day long starting when I was trying to order breakfast at the mall, I felt the numbing and eerie sensation of the piercing gazes of them. . . and without Ruka, all of them were targeting me and only me. They were fighting to get my attention, my money, my food, my clothes, and even my socks just for their wide array of collectible Natsume things and plushies. Uhh, that was tiresome and gross. Aside from that, nothing big happened other than Polka.
Finally, I reached home, it was already 7 in the evening and my feet were as heavy as iron plated knight's armor; Maybe even heavier still because of the exercise I got from running away from the 'beasts' of Tokyo. I was just glad to be home and that was that. I just hope that Polka and Hag would finish with whatever they were doing inside my room, without MY permission.
" Stupid girls with their stupid needs and their stupid wants for men and stupid gross thoughts that stupidly gross me to heck. . ." I mumbled some more inconspicuous words as I tried to find the keys to my only sanctuary in this crazy fangirl filled city. I was really surprised to find that my broken door was now fixed, repaired and ready to be of some use as a separator for privacy.
I opened the door to see total darkness. "Maybe the hag took Polka with her after all." I thought to myself as I heard no sound inside but part of me was disappointment with that fact. I wanted to play with her some more and make her do more chores for me.
" Whatever." I shrugged it off a bit before trying to reach for the lights of the room until I heard the unfamiliar sound of a girl crying.
" Polka." I somehow got an intuition that it was her crying inside of my room. Yeah, I mean no girl would ever dare trespass into a man's room much less mine. " Oi, I know you're here." Finally I found the switch and switched the lights on to find Polka crying on the floor.
". . .What the heck are you crying about?"
" I'm. . . I'm. . ." she sniffed. "Preg—"
"—NANT!" I finished the statement. . . WHAT THE HELL?!?!
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Me: Konnichiwa, thanks for taking your time in reading my story. . .(gloomily) Sorry, still not done moping about my failure to reach my parents' expectations. SNIFF. WAAH! cries
Natsume: Girls are so sensitive.
SMACK!
Mikan: That's why we're GIRLS stupid!
Natsume: Who the heck are you calling stupid! BAKA! (starts fighting)
Me: Well, feel free to review my fic. Really, feel free to comment on anything that you may not understand. Oh the Oshizushi is a type of rice dish in Japan which is cooked with soup and stuff. . . Sorry but I can't write a clear detail since I don't have the book about the other Japanese foods. The other two: Mitarashi Dango and Dashimaki Tamago are snacks mostly like by Japanese kids. . . Well, time for PREVIEW! Mikan—Lights! Natsume—Camera! ACTION:
New Character says:
Hi, my name is. . . whatever. I don't feel like talking to you right now because I am busy trying to make more money and profit out of people. ( After few minutes) I feel bored. Hmm, must be because this job doesn't concern money at all. Why am I in here anyway? I should be taking pictures of Nogi and Hyuuga for the next chapter in which I will be shown at last. (evil smirk) Hehe, I will make millions of yen out of this.
Notice: I was wondering If you, the readers would still like me to continue the story in Natsume's POV. I am open to suggestions whether to make it still his POV, other character's POV (like Mikan's POV) or just the regular POV. We can make the plot thicker if it was in regular POV but of course, we could loose the Natsume torture and funniness (Aaww) Well, that's for you, Reader Version 1.5, to decide. See ya in the next chapter!
Submitted: 01/20/08