Note: Luigi wasn't harmed in the making of this chapter. As for Steve.... Well... -Cough.- I also have nothing against Canadians. They're awesome. Ogre comes from Canada. HE IS GODLY. D; I support animal rights. This is just written purely out of entertainment. ... I love how Pavi ignores all of Luigi's insults. xD He's like "La la la..." Ahem. I also must be legally insane for even writing this story. Ah well. Have fun reading this chapter! :D

"CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!" Came a frantic cry. "She'll stain the sheets, they'll run with blood!"

"..." The brothers looked at each other equally silent for once.

A zoo cop ran after the crazed Repo Man who merrily skipped by. The scene was hilarious. Tourists eagerly snapped photos, laughing amongst themselves. This day was turning out to be quite... epic.

The sun must have fried the poor man's brains. Now, the white coats were after him. Pavi and Luigi watched for their own entertainment.

"Fucktard," Luigi mumbled.

"Douche," Pavi agreed.

"Ho-hee. Oh crap. They're coming to take me away!" Steve Bob McSteve continued to run. Rolling their eyes, the Largo brothers walked to see the lions.

"Luigi," The younger male pointed to a male lion in all its basking glory.

"What?" The brown haired man squinted his blue eyes. "So? It's not killing or anything..."

"It's-a you!"

Luigi frowned, trying to determine if Pavi's words were an insult or a compliment.

"The fuck do you mean it's me?"

"Well-a, you're-a strong, you-a kill, you-a have power through-a fear, and-a you're a 'soon to be' king. So-a is a lion. As well as-a fierce and-a you get the point, bello."

Now, he was silent with a brow raised. Did his brother really think that highly of him? To be honest, he never knew. Luigi always loathed and hated the annoying little fuck. There were moments where he found him tolerable. An example being whenever Pavi killed a woman... for their face. Today, he was tolerable of the little shit for some strange reason.

Pavi leaned on the barrier of the open lions' exhibit. His back was to the carnivorous animals. He gently drummed his fingers on the wooden ramp.

"Pavi, you're not hitting on me, are you?"

"No."

"What exactly are you saying, then?"

He rolled his own cerulean eyes. "I'm-a saying that I-a think Papá is-a giving GeneCo to-a you."

"Are you fucking serious?"

"Sí." Look at-a me. Look at-a sister. You're the-a least fucked up-a."

"You've got that right."

"Maybe, it's-a because you-a received less-a attention than-a sister and I."

"Are you saying that I'm less fucked up, because I didn't didn't get much attention from Pop when you two shits were born!?" He was beginning to grow irritated now. "Is this why you wanted to go to the crappy zoo?"

"Aheh." He waved his hands with a soft smile. "No."

"'Cuz if so, I'll fucking kill you." Rough hands reached out for the soft neck.

"Surely, you-a won't kill-a the Pavi.. After all-" As Pavi backed up, he fell over the barrier- like railing, stumbling into the creatures' domain.

"...Shit-nosed idiot. Get the fuck back here so I can ki- talk to you!"

Pavi began walking backwards, closer to the predators. Tourists gasped and gawked, turning their attention to the man with the lions. They whipped out their camera phones, video cameras, and everything in between. This was some day.

"The Pavi's going to-a ride a lion!"

Ooh's and aah's came as a response.

"..." Luigi watched with balled fists.

"His-a name is-a now Luigi!"

"...Jesus effin' Christ. Get your pansy ass back here!"

"Not-a yet!"

"Don't make me come in there!"

"Haha! You-a said 'come'!"

"Little fucker!" Luigi grabbed the spear out of the gift bag and jumped in the exhibit. They might as well have been dead men.

Meanwhile, a news chopper hovered in the sky, filming this mighty fine moments.

Surprisingly, Pavi had a certain way with the animals. Hence, the prior incident with the gorilla. He was probably oozing hormones (obviously, duh). It must have been the pheromones that lured in the critters and ultimately humbled them.

The male lion appeared to be grinning. His muzzle was curved into something resembling a near smile. Golden eyes appeared to be sedated. Basking in the moment, Pavi swung a leg over the clion, sitting on his back. Thanks to the Largo's lithe frame, the mammal was able to endure the light weight.

Luigi stood still, spear in one hand. Was Pavi nuts? as Pavi began riding the lion like a cowboy with a horse, it answered his question. Yes. His brother was bat out of Hell crazy. It could have been the sugar he consumed...

"I'm-a riding Luigi!"

"..." Luigi's palm collided with his face. Instead of killing Pavi, he would have to save him from the damned animals. The eldest didn't want bad ass lions killing his faggy little brother. No, he was supposed to harbor the abuse in that department.

"Gett the fuck back here!" He raised and lowered the spear in all his rage. He tried to edge closer to the lions. It was a failed attempt. They lowered on their haunches, shoulder blades flexing upwards. Their muzzles curled in sinister smirks. Low grows were emitted.

"Oh, come on!" Luigi cried out. "Can't you give a man a freaking break?"

More growls.

"I'm-a King of the-a Lions!"

They edged closer.

"...Hehe. Nice bad ass lions. You're cool. I'm cool. We're all cool, right?"

The lioness' approached all the more.

"Nice kitties? The easily angered brother gave a cry, pivoting. He ran for fear of his life, both knife and spear in his grasp. He was a modern day gladiator in a coliseum full of angry lions...sort of. The spectators (tourists and the likes) watched with ongoing amusement. They gave claps and whistles. They thought it was a show. It was a grand old time to them.

"Talk about party animals, eh?" A canadian cracked a joke, laughing at it.

"NOBODY THINKS YOU'RE FUNNY. GO BACK TO FUCKING CANADA!" Luigi shouted, still running for his life. The roars were vicious.

"Rawr!" An unknown tourist mockingly shouted.

"Omg like dis iz goin' on da webs!" Obsessive girls cried out, snapping photos with their phones.

"My pants!"

"His-a pants!"

Riiiip. A lioness tore off Luigi's pants. There went $2,000 trousers. Oh, the tragedy.

"Haha! Brother wears-a boxers!"

Luigi flushed, stomping up to the animal that happily munched his clothing. Stab. Stab. Stab. "FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUUUCK!" Blood squirted over his face and onto the once green grass. The lust for blood was evident in his eyes. The spear remained in the poor creature's sternum. The muscles had relaxed due to the phase of death.

"Nobody messes with Luigi fucking Largo!"

By then, Pavi had gotten off of the male lion. He had his fun on the wild ride. Then, there was another tearing sound followed by an effeminate gasp.

"My-a pants!" A choked sob. He had dearly loved those tightly fitting had brought him through many sexual conquests.

"Hah!"

"... He-a ate my-a pants!"

"Pfft! Pavi's wearing a fucking thong!"

Both men were flushed with embarrassment as they fled to the bushes.

"You owe me pants."

"Luigi owes-a me pants!" Another sob.

"No, I fucking don't!"

"Luigi the Lion."

"Oh."

"My-a poor pants..."

"Haha! That's great! We need a camera. This is fucking hot."

"...A-what?"

A clearing of the throat. "You owe me pants, fag."

The erections were evident. After wearing skirts made of newspaper, Pavi bought pants at another nearby gift shop.

'I'll bet this is going to be in the fucking papers."

"Or-a television."