"And she's so beautiful. I've never seen an angel before, but if I had, I bet it would look exactly like her."
"I…I can't live without her right now, Mom. If I leave her…I'm know I'm going to regret it for the rest of my life. I don't want to make a mistake like that. I…I can't break her heart…Mom…not after all she's done for me…"
"I can't let her go…she means too much to me…"
Jessie could hardly believe her ears. The words contained so much raw emotion that there was absolutely no way they could have been dramatized. No movie, no play, no book that she had read had ever conveyed a sense of emotion as the previous soliloquy.
The only person that would speak that way about another human being was someone who had fallen hopelessly in love with their counterpart.
What surprised Jessie the most however, was that there was no doubt that the speaker was Mark.
"Wow…" was the only response Jessie could manage after the recording stopped.
Michiru smiled brightly behind her clasped hands. "That was my initial reaction, exactly."
"I can see why…!" Jessie said, her voice aghast. "I…I've never heard anything like that before…wow…" She looked at Michiru and smiled heartily. "He really loves you, Miss Satomi…!"
Michiru could hardly contain her excitement. "I hoped that was what you said, Jessie," she admitted. "I wanted to have a second opinion to make sure I wasn't dreaming."
Jessie chuckled. "I've got news for you, Miss Satomi. That wasn't a dream…he's fallen head-over-heels for you…and I mean hard!" She added, "The only question I would have is…how you feel about this, Miss Satomi?"
Michiru lowered her clasped hands down to her desk, her ruby-red lips trembling slightly. "That's…the real reason why I wanted to talk with you, Jessie…!"
It took Jessie a moment to process what her statement meant, but when she realized the truth behind it, her smile got even larger. "Miss Satomi…!" she breathed. "Does that mean…?"
Slowly nodding, Michiru couldn't keep her voice from choking up. "I love him!"
Jessie squealed delightfully. She bolted around the desk and threw her arms around Michiru. "Oh, I'm so happy for you, Miss Satomi!" she beamed. "I always knew you'd find someone!"
Michiru couldn't stop another tear from cascading down her cheek. "Thank you, Jessie…" she whispered. "I'm glad you were right about me…"
"He knows about this, doesn't he?" Jessie asked, as she stepped back.
Michiru frowned. "No…" she admitted. "I…just realized I felt this way about him a little while ago, Jessie."
"But you're planning on telling him, aren't you?"
"Of course! I just…don't…really know if this is the best time…"
"Why wouldn't it be?" Jessie asked frankly. She pointed to the phone. "You heard what he said. Now would be the perfect time to tell him."
Michiru bit her lower lip and paused. She then told Jessie about eavesdropping on what was supposed to be a private conversation between Mark and his parents.
"So you're thinking that he didn't want you to know that?" Jessie asked.
"I wasn't supposed to hear that part of the conversation, Jessie," Michiru repeated. "I don't how he'll take it if I tell him that I heard what he said."
"But you can't think that he won't be happy to know how you feel about him," Jessie pointed out. "Based on everything that he said, he'd be elated to know that you felt that way about him."
"I know…but…"
"Miss Satomi," Jessie said, "what's happens if you don't tell him? If you wait too long and don't say anything then he'll think that his love and affection are going unnoticed. If that happens, he may rethink how he feels-!" Jessie stopped abruptly as Michiru snapped her head up quickly, her eyes as big as saucers, her lips quivering. "Uh…not that that will ever happen…" Jessie said quickly, bringing her hands up in front of her. "But…you must know that you have to tell him eventually," she finished.
Michiru lowered her head down so that she was staring at her hands in her lap. "I know…" she murmured. "I know I have to Jessie…but…I'm not sure how I should. I mean…I've never felt like this about anyone before…everything that I've ever felt in my life…nothing compares to this. I know in my heart how much I care about him…and how much I want to be with him…but I want to do this right. I don't want to screw this up…"
Jessie made her way to the other side of Michiru's desk and said, "Just tell him, Miss Satomi. That's the only thing you can do."
After Jessie had departed, Michiru sat in silence, her mind racing in a futile attempt to figure out what she should do. Everything that she could think of, it all didn't seem worthy of Mark and what had said about her. Nothing was good enough for him.
He went through all that for you, she reminded herself. There's got to be something…
Michiru slowly raised her head. That was it! That was what she could do for now…to ensure that she would be able to confess her feelings to Mark in whatever way she wanted.
Without hesitation, she picked up the phone and sat back for what would definitely be a long and ground-breaking conversation.
Mark felt as if he had suddenly gained an additional one hundred pounds of weight. He sat in silence, his body limp, the back of his head resting against the wall for support, his eyes barely open.
It was the worst he'd felt in quite some time.
Why do I feel like this? he asked himself.
He kept replaying the conversation with his parents in his mind; every word that was said and every emotion that he had felt came pouring back into him. It was so vivid and powerful that it felt like his head was going to explode from the intensity.
But one thing was perfectly clear to him now.
He knew exactly how madly in love he was with Michiru.
When she had said that she would want him to what he wanted, instead of what was best for them that had such a profound affect on him. As a result, when he had spoken only to his parents everything had came out of him in a rush without any thought behind it whatsoever. It was as if he was running on adrenaline throughout that portion of the conversation and once he had started, he found himself pushing further along until he was in tears at the thought of not having her in his life.
There's no denying it now, Ramsey, he told himself. You know you meant everything you said. That's how you really feel about her.
So what are you going to do…?
That thought stung Mark painfully.
He had not wanted Michiru to hear him speaking to his parents at that moment out of fear that he would say something that he shouldn't have.
However, thinking back on it now, Mark was anguished over the fact that she hadn't heard him confess how he felt about her. Now, because she didn't know how he much he loved her, it was like he was lying to her about the entire thing.
And what if she doesn't feel the same way…?
Mark's eyes widened and his body stiffened.
If he told Michiru how he felt…and it turned out that she didn't feel the same about him…?
What am I going to do?!
He nearly jumped out of his chair when the door to the briefing room swooshed upon suddenly. He couldn't stifle a yelp however, and it seemed to hang in the air for several seconds.
He slowly turned toward the now open doorway; Andrei stared at him blankly.
"Hey," he said simply, as if Mark's reaction hadn't taken place.
"Oh…h-hi Andrei…" Mark stammered. He placed his hand on his forehead and leaned back into his chair. "W-what's up…?"
The older man stepped to the front of the room and pulled down the viewing screen. "Thought I'd get in some last minute review for the final race. See what Sledge Mamma's been up to on the track for the past few days."
"Oh…yeah…that's a good idea."
A few moments of silence passed, allowing Mark to think some more about what he should do in regards to Michiru.
"What's wrong with you?" Andrei asked. Mark glanced at him quickly. "You look like you got hit by a bus."
If you only knew…Mark thought.
Another few seconds passed before Mark spoke again.
"Hey…Andrei…?"
"Yeah?"
"Can…can I ask you something…?"
"Sure."
Mark folded his hands in front of him and leaned forward. "How…how did you propose to your wife?"
Yet another period of silence followed. Mark believed that he may have said something he shouldn't have, but finally Andrei spoke.
"Well…when I finally realized how much I cared for Jane…how I couldn't go another second, let alone minute, without her being a part of my life…I knew I had no other choice but to tell her how I feel. That's when I asked her marry me."
He continued. "I felt that if I didn't, I wouldn't be doing her justice to reflect all that she had done for me. I couldn't let myself do that…I wouldn't have been able to live myself if I did. So…I swallowed my pride…and confessed that I loved her." He added, "Luckily for me, she felt the same way about me and said yes."
Mark couldn't help but chuckle. Only Andrei could tell that story in that way.
"Do you mean to tell me that you haven't told Michiru yet?"
Mark glanced at Andrei, his eyes wide. "W-What…?" The older man was now facing the screen again, watching the footage of Sledge Mamma's practice sessions earlier during the week. "H-How did you…?"
Andrei shrugged. "Eh…I've known for a couple of weeks now."
"How?" Mark demanded, rising to his feet.
Andrei glanced at him. "Just by the way you've been acting around her…and the look that you get whenever you're together. Anyone who's been in love before knows that look. There's nothing else that makes anyone look and act like that. And that includes Michiru and you."
The mention of her name was enough to suck all the air out of Mark's chest. "Wait…does that mean that she…?"
Andrei smiled. "You haven't realized it yet? She's just as crazy about you as you are about her."
Mark slowly smiled as his insides seemed to explode with joy and happiness. He couldn't believe it. That meant that she…that she…
"She left about ten minutes ago." Mark snapped his head toward Andrei again. "She's probably on her way back to her apartment. If you hurry you might be able to catch her."
Mark didn't need any other information. He was sprinting for the doorway before he even realized it. "Thanks, Andrei!"
"Mark!" Mark stopped himself in the doorway and glanced back at Andrei. He was focused on the screen. "Remember…be yourself."
He smiled. "Thanks, Andrei!"
Mark ran faster than he ever had before. He rushed through the building corridors and outside into the darkening evening atmosphere. Breathing quickly, he ran to the garage and jumped into the driver's seat of his car.
She loves you…she loves you…he kept repeating to himself.
And you love her. Remember that. Be sure to tell her that. Be sure to tell her everything…how you feel, how she makes you feel, how much you care about her, how much you think about her…
Mark realized then that his car hadn't started.
He turned the key again and still nothing happened.
No…no…no!
He tried again and again, but still the engine wouldn't crack. Mark banged his head against the steering wheel in frustration.
This can't get any worse…
The load boom outside made his insides sink.
He raised his head and saw the beginning of the rain start to pour out of the sky.
And it wasn't just a shower; this was a deluge.
Mark dropped his head into his hands and sighed painfully.
"What am I going to do?"
Do you care about her?
Mark raised his head. He realized that was his own voice.
Do you care about her?
"Yes."
Would you do anything for her?
"Of course."
Do you love her?
"YES!" Mark shouted.
Then what are you waiting for?
Mark was out of his car in an instant. He made his way to the garage exit and stopped to look out into the rain. It was raining even harder than it had been a few weeks earlier when she had given him a ride home. That was where his feelings for her had first manifested.
So it's almost appropriate for it rain now, Mark told himself.
He didn't have time to answer. The next thing he knew, he was running, through the deluge of water and toward the one he loved.
