I do not own The Cat Returns.
It was a lovely day at the country-side of Japan, the wind was blowing gently, the sun shone its warm rays on the earth, and the flowers were dancing in the wind. Yep, everything was peaceful and quiet...................
"YOU BIG FAT COW!"
Well...........almost quiet anyway.............
"WHO YOU CALLING A BIG FAT COW, CHICKEN LEGS?!" A fat two legged cat shouted at a crow who was almost his height.
"YOU, YOU CROSSBREED OF A PIG AND A CAT!" The crow shouted at the fat cat.
A quiet human girl who was standing in front of the two bickering animals, sighed in annoyance as she started rubbing her temples. She has brown chestnut hair in a ponytail, while the color of her eyes are chocolate brown, plus she was wearing a raggedy yet baggy warrior's shirt, pants and cloak along with leathe black boots, while a big sword with a carved metal lion's head on the hilt was mounted on her back. But the most mysterious thing she ever wore most of all, was a necklace with two wedding rings attached to the silver chain
"Guys................" the girl tried to speak,but they still kept arguing.
"YOU ARE SUCH AN IMMATURE BIRDBRAIN!"
"LOOK WHO'S TALKING SIR PIGALOT?!"
"Fellas......"
"WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME PIG?!"
"CUZ I SAW YOU EATING SOME HUMAN'S PORKCHOP WHEN YOU WERENT LOOKING!!!!!!!"
That's when the human girl started to shout. "TOTO! MUTA! ENOUGH!"
"But Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuuuuu he started it!" The two bickering animals said as they pointed each other.
The human girl who was called Haru groaned at her friends's reply but couldnt help laughing on the inside about their usual constent arguing.
"I need you two to quiet it down for a few minutes, we'll be in Cat Beareau City soon and we dont want to scare anybody."
Muta snorted. "Aw come on Chicky, its not like they ever heard an arguement before."
Haru nodded in agreement. "That's true, but when it comes to you and Toto, your name calling arguements scare the living daylights out of the little toddlers, and babies."
Muta and Toto sweat dropped anime style and sighed. "So true."
Then suddenly they heard screaming not too far away. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME! SOMEONE! PLEASE HELP ME!"
"Uh oh! Sounds like someone's in trouble!" Toto said with a bit of worry.
"No duh featherduster! Judging by that scream it sounds like a female cat's in trouble." Muta said with experience.
"How do you know, you big glutton?" Toto wondered.
"Cuz Im a cat, birdbrain, I can tell the difference between a human's scream and a cat's scream."
"Okay you two chill out! We got to find her and rescue her, bfore its too late! Lets go!" Haru said.
Then the trio raced to the source of the screaming, hoping they'll get there in time.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A white female cat with blue eyes, wears a pink bow around her neck and was wearing a pink dress, was cowering near a tree as a bunch of thugs were coming closer to her.
"P-Please dont hurt me....." the white female cat pleaded.
One of the thugs laughed at her. "Then hand over your valuables and we'll be on our way....."
The white female cat kept shuddering in fright but was going to reach into her pocket to give them her money until a femenine stern voice interrupted.
"Hey thugs! Step away from lady and get lost!"
The thugs turned around and they along with the frightned white female cat saw our three heroes glaring at them.
The thugs were a bit frightened by the angry looking trio, so one of them try to lie their way out of it. (Pssssh they wish!)
"Uhhhhhhhhhhh........... dont mind us! We're just keeping the nice lady company since we saw her all alone by herself."
The three heroes snorted.
"Riiiiiiight and Muta FINALLY decides to go on a diet!" Haru said with sarcasm.
"Hey, Im right here you know, Chicky!" Muta spat a little bit.
"Heh, sorry pal. Anyway we're on to what you were going to do to her and we're not going to leave until you leave her be!" the girl snarled at the thugs.
"Well fellas, it seems that they know about our mugging operation. Since they think that they're all so tough....LETS GET 'EM!" the "leader" of the thugs said then they started to attack the three.
Muta ran at the some of the thugs and mowed them down by ramming into them, while Toto flew VERY fast and started to swoop down and peck them sharply on the head before the foolish thugs had the chance of striking him down with their weapons. Then Haru, instead of using her silver sword picked up a BIG stick nearby and started running at the goons and thwacked them in the stomachs to the top of their heads. The trio kept attacking the thugs until they finally ran away.
"ITS NO USE! THEY'RE TOO STRONG!"
"RETREAAAAAAAAAAAT!"
Haru dropped the big stick and went over to the white female cat while Muta and Toto went after the thugs to try to capture them.
"Hey are you ok? You're not hurt are you?" Haru asked with concern.
The female white cat suddenly bowed to her in pure joy. "Thank you very much! I was so scared that I didnt know what to do!"
Haru started to feel nervous at the grateful white cat's bowing so she started to try to get her to stop.
"Y-You dont have to bow miss! We're just doing our jobs!"
"But you three have saved my life! Is there anything I can do to repay you, three?"
Even though Haru doesnt approve herself to accept anything from anyone, she began to think that the female white haired cat would help Muta, Toto and herself to get to Cat Beareau City without any problems.
"Uh do you know where Cat Beareau City is by any chance? Well what I mean is, I know where it is, its just that I heard that there is some pretty tight security everywhere from the castle to the city, ever since that the queen got assassinated. Will you help us get inside, please?" Haru asked politely.
The white cat nodded. "Of course! I'd be happy to help you three inside the city! And its also a good thing that the three of you found me too! I am one of the royal families personal servant!"
Haru looked at the white cat with pure gratefulness as anime sparkles sparkled all around her as her eyes wavered anime style. "Bless you and your job madame!"
The white cat giggled at Haru's reaction. "My name is Yuki and I live in Cat Beareau City. What's your name?"
"Im Haru Yoshiaka, from Fisherman Village. The fat cat's name is Muta, although sometimes we call him Moota on account that he looks like a big cow sometimes. The big black crow is called Toto, he's very nice but he can be a bit harsh towards Muta, sometimes. They're my best friends. Well.....my best friends on the male list anyway." Haru explained as she scratched her head a bit.
Yuki chuckled at Haru some more, despite the fact she's human, she's pretty funny!
Then Muta and Toto ran......and flap back to where Haru and Yuki is.
"Hey Chicky! Is the other Chicky ok?" Muta asked.
"Yeah Muta, she's fine. Did you and Toto get the bozos?"
Toto shook his head. "No they got away, for a bunch of oafish looking fiends they sure can run fast."
Haru sighed in disappointment. "That's a crying shame, I was looking forward to kicking their butts alot more. Oh well."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(At Cat Beareau city, inside the palace)
"FATHER!!!!!!" Two male voices shouted out loud. (MAN does EVERYONE in this chapter have to shout?)
Two angry looking princes marched to their father's throne room. One of them was a blueish, blackish cat wit a red eye and blue eye while he wore a blue satin silkish clothes, while the other prince was an orange cat with mint green eyes and he wears a white cotton suit with silk white gloves and white cotton top hat with leather white shoes. And let us not forget his smooth wooden polished cane! Anyway they stormed into the throne room and glared at their father who was sitting on his royal chair while showing a little grin on his face. (Their father in this story is a different cat and not that crazy old cat king.........he scares me! Even though he's funny.) Their father was an old gray cat with a golden crown on his head, while he wears a navy blue robe.
"What's the matter my sons? Why the angry faces?" Their father asked.
"You know exactly why we're angry father!" the orange cat said testily.
"Yes! Its bad enough that you setted us up for arranged marriages, but you also setting a tournament up and giving our hands in marriages as first prize!" The blueish blackish cat spoke angerily.
The cat king chuckled at his two sons's irritated behavior.
"Well my sons, you both said you didnt want to marry your ex-fiances, so a tournament was the only way to get you two a couple of wives already!"
"But father! We dont want to marry some strangers that we dont know! I want to marry Yuki!" The blueish blackish cat complained.
"And I wanted to marry who I truly love! There's no point in any of us to marry people that we dont know!" the orange cat said.
The old cat king gave his two sons a stern stare. "Lune, I know how much you wanted to marry Yuki but she is not of royal blood nor is she of warrior blood! She is a servant! I like Yuki as well, but the law is the law! And Humbert, if you took the time to meet the contestants in the tournament, Im sure you can find someone you will like!"
The orange cat blushed with embarressment from his name, while Lune looked down at the floor with discouragement.
"Now if you two will excuse me, I must go to my royal office and do some paper work! My break is over!" the elderly cat king said as he got up from his throne and exited out of the room.
The two princes left as well and they went to the garden.
"This isnt fair! Stupid tupid laws and their stupid tupid consequences! I dont want to marry any girl.....I want to marry Yuki......" Lune said sadly.
But his brother wasnt listening as he began to rant about his name. "Oh why must father insist on calling me Humbert?! My name is Baron! He knows that!"
Lune looked at Baron with sympathey. "Baron, I know you dont like that name very much, but think about mother! She's the one who gave you that name because you looked like our grandfather from her side of the family!"
Baron's ears drooped down sadly. "I know.......I tried so hard to like that name but no matter how hard I tried it always sound so weird.......and as for our marriage problem.....we'll just have to deal with it. You know how father is."
Lune blinked a few times. "Shouldnt we try to run away again?"
Baron shook in fear. "No! Not again! Dont you remember what happened the LAST time we tried running away?!"
Then the whole scene started to waver as though a flashback was going to start but the two brothers began to shout in fear, anime style.
"NO!!!!!!! DONT SHOW THE MEMORY! ITS TOO SCARY!!!!!!"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yuki, Haru, Toto, and Muta have arrived at the gates of Cat Beareau City, now they have to deal with one little problem: the guards. Luckily for Haru, Toto, and Muta, Yuki was in their company to help them get inside.
"You three wait right here, while I go talk to the guards." Yuki instructed.
The three nodded as she walked over to the guards.
The guards who are big and tall were at first standing real still but when Yuki arrived they raised their spears at her. "Halt! Who goes there?!"
"Its just me, Yuki. Prince Lune's servant." Yuki said softly.
The guards relaxed. "Welcome back, Miss Yuki. Please come in."
"Wait a minute please. I am not alone, I have brought friends with me and they want to come inside too!"
The guards took a look at Haru, Muta, and Toto then to Yuki. "They're not......assassins are they?"
Yuki shook her head. "No, they're not! They saved me from bandits and all they wanted was to stay in Cat Beareau City for the night!"
"Very well then, Miss Yuki. You and your friends can come in." One of the guards said as he opened the gate.
The gates opened as Yuki turned around and beckoned Haru, Toto, and Muta to come inside with her.
Once they stepped in, Haru's, Toto's, and Muta's jaws dropped at the sight of Cat Bereau City......it was amazing! There were sky high buildings and tiny shops and a mall and resteraunts and a beach......the whole city has EVERYTHING! Yuki turned around to face her friends with a smile.
"So? What do you three think?"
"Oh........." Haru first said.
"My........." Muta spoke after Haru.
"Kami......" Toto finished.
Yuki laughed at the three awed friends. "That's what I said when I first came here! And you should DEFINATLY stay at the Cat Beareau City hotel, that place is SO fancy that you would want to stay forever!"
The three blinked in amazement. "Really?"
Yuki nodded. "Come on. I'll take you there, before I get back to the castle."
Then the four began to head over to the hotel, once they passed a few buildings they saw an old man hollering his voice to the people as they walked by.
"Come all you tough warrior ladies and get ready to sign up for a free trip to the spa! This is the only opprotunity that you will get in your young lives! Dont be shy!" the old man said, then when he spotted Haru he quickly pointed to her.
"You! Young lady! May I have a word with you?" The old man asked Haru.
Haru looked around then she hilariously pointed at herself.
"Yes you! Have you ever felt tired, and icky from all these days of traveling? Do you want a free day of refreshment at the spa? Well now's your chance to get a free makeover!"
Haru sweatdropped anime style and tried to refuse. "Uhhhh......no thanks.....I dont really have the time for any of that st-"
But Toto quickly covered her mouth with his wing and spoke for her. "Of course she would! Its been a LONG time since Haru's been at a real luxery place."
Haru quickly grabbed Toto and dragged him over a few inches away from the old man, Yuki and Muta while the old man and Yuki looked at them with confusion and Muta just sighed.
"Toto, what was that for? You KNOW that I dont accept and do stuff like that!" Haru scolded.
"Haru, you REALLY need to stop being so humble! It's gonna be your downfall if you keep doing that!" Toto argued.
As the two were arguing, Yuki looked concerned, then she looked at Muta.
"Are they always like this?" Yuki asked.
Muta shook his head. "Not really......they do fight once in a while but not as much as Toto and I. Haru's always been so humble. She's been like that ever since we were little, so whenever something good was gonna happen to Haru, we always speak for her since we knew that she's gonna turn it down."
"Oh.....I see." Yuki said as she returned her gaze at Haru and Toto.
"I cant go to a spa! Look at me! Im as awful looking then a swamp witch!" Haru softly snapped.
Toto began to show an animeish angry vein as he began to talk back to Haru. "For the love of your ancestors, Haru! Muta and I told you so many times already that you're not ugly!"
"Maybe not to you guys, but Im positively sure that other girls and guys must of thought of that when we visited that other village! And besides, I had a bath last night!"
Toto sighed then turned around while he spoke. "Well Haru.....it seems that you gave me no other choice......"
Haru's anger suddenly faded away as confusion began to show on her face. "What do you mean, Toto?"
Then suddenly Toto gently turned around, showing Haru his sad yet adorable look anime style. "Haru.....please go to the spa........"
Haru suddenly turned ghostly white as she stared at Toto's puppy dog look. "Oh no......its.....its the look! Must.......resist.........the look!"
But Toto's adorable look was too powerful against Haru's willpower. "Alright! Alright! I'll sign up and go! Just please, no more of "the look!" Its too much!"
Toto's adorable look then turned to a crafty smile. "I knew you'd see things my way."
Then Haru went over to the old man and signed her name at the register board while mumbling on how much Toto is a big cheater for using his puppy dog pout.
"There I signed up! Happy now?" Haru asked in a low stressed out tone.
"Yep!" Both Muta and Toto said with a smile.
Yuki said nothing but giggled a bit. Then suddenly the old man cackled in pure delight, which confused the four alot.
"What's so funny old man?" Muta asked.
"Hahahahaha! I tricked ya! This wasnt a sign up for a spa treatment! This was sign up for a tournament for warrior women!" the old man said as he kept cackling.
"WHAT?!" Haru, Toto, Muta, and Yuki all asked in an outrage.
"I changed my mind! Get my name off the signature board, right now!" Haru demanded in anger.
The old man continued to laugh. "Sorry missy! Once you signed your name on this board, you cant back out! Besides, you dont even know what the grand prize is!"
Muta who was still angry at the old man, looked at him with a bit of curiousity. "What's the grand prize, gramps?"
The old man smiled. "Only what every girl wants in her lifetime: One of the prince's hand in marriage!"
The four stood still, with animeish looks on their faces.
"Your serious?" Toto asked.
"I dont lie." The old man said.
Haru hilariously turned around and tried to run away but both Muta and Toto grabbed her.
"Where do you think you're going?" Toto asked.
"I just remembered! I think Im better off sleeping in the wilderness! So Im going to go there and stay there until the tournament is over!" Haru said as she tried to break free.
"Chicky, dont you get it?! This is it! The answer to your prayers! Once you win the tournament, you'll get married to the one of the princes, live happily ever after and you'll be free from your......condition!" Muta said with a bit of excitement as he gently shook Haru and was careful not let Yuki know of Haru's problem.
Haru had a look of concern as she took a look at Yuki a bit, then dragged Muta a few inches away from the others. "But Muta, didnt you hear what the lion spirit said? He said in order for him to cross over was for me to fall in love with the guy while the guy must love me back! How can I win a tournament and marry a prince who barely knows me? There will be misery, in the relationship I tell ya! MISERY!"
Muta snorted, "You worry too much, all you got to do is bond with him after when you get married! Then you'll fall in love with him, he falls in love with you, the lion spirit guy will cross over and be happy again then you two will live happily ever after! Now come on! We better ask the old man where the tournament is held!"
Haru watched her friend go to the old man as Muta and Toto began to ask the old guy for directions, then our heroine massaged her forehead. "Just what have I got myself into?"
Yuki looked at Haru with great worry as a new fear wormed its way into her heart. (Dont worry folks, Yuki isnt gonna be jealous of Haru or hate her in this story, Im afraid of that!) Of all the schemes the elderly cat king has cooked up, this took the cake. If Haru did win the tournament, which prince is she going to marry? And what condition was Muta talking about?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hoo boy looks like Haru has been pulled into one of life's oldest yet greatest messes! And how is she going to explain it to Yuki? Is Yuki EVER going to know? Will Baron like Haru when she sets foot into the palace's outdoor coliseum? Will the elderly cat king stop scheming behind his sons's backs? And will we EVER see that accursed scary flashback of Baron and Lune's first runaway experience?
Baron and Lune: No!
Awwwwwwwww...................