LOWER ELEMENTS POLICE PLAZA, HAVEN

Captain Holly Short did not know which was more annoying; traffic duty with Chix Verbil or traffic duty with Grub Kelp. Unfortunately, she had the misfortune of working with both of them that day. At the same time.

Chix, as self-centered as ever, fingered his sprite wings absently as he stared openly at the Captain. Occasionally, when Holly would chance to look his way, he would pucker up his lips and wink at her. When she would grimace and turn the other way, Chix was unfazed; Captain Short was simply in denial of her true feelings for him.

Grub Kelp had an uncanny knack of leaving his post at exactly the wrong moment. Two minor accidents were already reported on his shift. At present, Holly seemed more concerned for her status at the LEP than for Grub's. For every mistake the corporal would make, she was usually the one that was blamed for it. Just because she was a girl...

Why did police officers have to be so sexist? It was driving Holly Short up the wall. Captain Short had proved on a number of occasions that female officers were just as apt at policing than male police officers. In fact, Holly had saved the underworld and the over world at least twice already. Did Grub or Chix or even Trouble Kelp have that on their resumes? I don't think so.

And yet, here she was, stuck in trafficking duty with her two least favorite comrades in LEP.

A nearby traffic violation jarred her out of her smoldering thoughts. Another hotshot pixie with a new vehicle to show off, she reckoned. The chrome painted vehicle was parked in the middle of the crosswalk, hindering the pedestrians from crossing. Two unobservant fairies had already rammed into the car and spilled their sim-coffee all over themselves.

Holly nonchalantly weaved through the traffic to the vehicle in violation. Sure enough, a pixie was driving. He had on a pair of trans-color sunglasses, similar to a Mud-man mood ring. The frame would detect body temperatures at the temporal artery and transfer them to the lenses. At present, the lenses were a cool green tinged with purple, a sure sign that the pixie was enjoying himself.

"Citizen," Holly began. "You are in violation of trafficking law six-two-four, please let me see your license and registration…"

"Well, hello, hot legs," the pixie crooned. The lenses in his sunglasses had changed to a hot pink.

"Shut up and show me the documents," Holly growled.

"Whatever ya say, gorgeous," the pixie complied.

By that time, Grub had also noticed the traffic violation and bumbled over to be of assistance.

"I've got this under wraps, Grub," Holly said. "Go back to your post."

"Okay," Grub answered, looking all too relieved that he didn't have to deal with the pixie. As he began to cross the street again, he stepped on a wad of freshly chewed gum. It took him thirty seconds to dislodge himself from the pavement and another thirty seconds to quit bumbling long enough to find his way back.

"So…" the pixie began. "How's about we do su'um tonight? Just you and me, huh, babes?"

Holly grimaced. "No thank you. I don't date criminals."

"This? This little thing? C'mon, this ain't no crime! You ain't turnin' me down for that, are ya?"

Holly smiled. "Yep. I'm not interested. Now, please remove your vehicle before it gets towed."

The pixie shook his head disbelievingly. He lifted up his arms and flexed his biceps. "Don't tell me ya don't like these bad boys?"

"Nope. Now," Holly growled, leaning into the window. "Get the car out of the crosswalk, or I'll do something with that pretty paint job of yours. And no amount of insurance is gonna cover it. Understood?"

The pixie gulped. "Yes, ma'am."

Holly smiled. "Good."

D'Arvit, I hate this job, Holly thought to herself as she walked away.

Holly's com link crackled into life in her helmet. A live recording of Foaly, the paranoid centaur who was chief of the technology department of LEP, fizzled onto the screen.

"Holly?..bzzz....Holly, can you hear me?"

"Read you loud and clear, Foaly," Holly replied. "What's going on?"

"Trouble Kelp just came back from his Recon mission. He had a little tight spot, and he ran out of magic. He's a little worse for wear, but he'll be fine. Anyway, he didn't complete his Recon. Commander Root would like you to take it from where he left off."

Holly's heart leapt. "I think I can do that."

Foaly smiled faintly. "Be at chute E4 in four hours. See you," he said right before his image fizzled out again.

Holly turned her gaze back to Chix, who noticed and puckered up again, then to Grub, who looked disoriented as he awkwardly moved traffic along.

So long, suckers, she thought.