The next day, Artemis found himself talking with his mother on his cellular phone, and Angeline

Fowl was sounding especially distraught.

"It's getting better, honestly, mother," Artemis was saying. "I'm not vomiting as much anymore….Butler says the virus should be gone in a few days."

"You should never have gotten it!" Angeline wailed. "And it was such bad timing, too…Have you been drinking plenty of water?"

"Yes, Mother," he sighed. "And you'll be glad to hear that my diet consists exclusively of saltine crackers and chicken broth."

"That's good to hear, darling," said Angeline. "But I wish there was something I could do."

"I'll be perfectly fine, Mother. I promise."

"That's right, Arty. Keep being optimistic."

"Is Father around?"

There was a pause, and Artemis visualized his mother surveying the area for any sign of her husband. "He's taking a nap, actually. These Zimbabwe children seem to think that he's a living jungle gym," she added with a chuckle. "They absolutely adore him, but I'm afraid it's definitely taking it's toll on his stamina."

"Will you tell him that I said hello?" Arty asked.

"Absolutely. Or better yet, you could record something for him. That way he can hear your voice rather than listen to me pass on your message."

Artemis looked up as Butler came into the room. The bodyguard's face was blank as he listened as the Fowl heir prepared to record something for his father.

"Hello, Father," Artemis began. "I'm sure you are doing well. I hope that you are taking your medicines regularly and that you don't overdo it. You know how stiff your leg can…"

Artemis' conversation drifted off into drabble as he watched the look Butler was giving him. He had seen Butler give that look before, but never to himself. It was a chiding look, but it managed to look quite menacing in its deliverance. Artemis began to realize that the method in which he was 'conversing' with his father was not exactly the best, and Butler knew it.

"Umm…" said Artemis, shaking his head. "Sorry about that…lost my train of thought." Artemis shook his head disbelievingly. Losing his train of thought was something that he would never do. The word 'um', he realized, was not normally integrated into his vocabulary.

"I miss you, Father," he began. He cast a glance at Butler, whose chiding look evaporated. He now looked simply bored. "Even though it has only been a few short days, I truly am beginning to miss you. And Mom--"

He stopped. Did he really just say 'mom'?

"Mother," he corrected. "I miss you both. I promise that the next time we go on a family vacation, I will try extra hard to avoid contracting an illness. Good-bye," he finished, and was just beginning to close his phone when he realized that he had forgotten to add something. "Oh, and Father…I love you."

He pulled the phone away from his ear and closed it. He looked up at his bodyguard once more. Butler was nodding, and Artemis thought he could detect a small smile on his face.

"I'll go make dinner, shall I?" Butler said, then backed out of the room.