V-chan - Well, here's the new chapter! It took forever!
Emily - Yep!
V-chan here's the chapter. Poll results so far and other thanks are at the bottom of the chapter.
Emily - Yep!
V-chan - Okay, well, someone get up here for disclaimer rights!
Lenalee – I'll say it.
Both – Thanks Lena-chan!
Lenalee – You're welcome. V-chan and Emily do not own D. Gray-man. If they did, well, it'd be totally random and insane.
Both – Too true. Thank You! Now enjoy the chapter!
Note
"speaking"
'thought'
(notes)
Ch 4: The Oddest Questions Ever
Well, here we are. V-chan and Emily were already starting the questions. Why? Because there were lots and lots of questions. The Noahs, exorcists, and Earl were already seated.
"Okay, let's start. This is from Jen Lawliet. 'I totally disagree! I think that Kanda would look good in a skirt with his hair down! Care to explain more on captain winky?' " Emily asked. Oddly enough, Kanda answered.
"We were around five years old at the time and Lavi used to carry a stuffed puppy around the Order. He wanted me to give it a hug, but I sliced it in half and he attacked me with his hammer and I fought back, causing us to destroy half of the order. In then end Bookman beat the living crap out of us. Then I found some random headband and I gave it to Lavi. Then he tried to hug me but he called me Yuu, so I chased him again.
--Flashback!--
"THANK YOU YUU!" said Lavi.
"..." Kanda was silent.
"... What?" Lavi asked
"...WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" asked Kanda slightly twitching.
"I said, 'Thank you Yuu.' "repeated Lavi.
"Don't EVER call me that again." Kanda seethed.
"WHY? What are YOU gonna do about it?" mocked Lavi, he put his hands on his hips. (girly man!)
"I'll tear you to shreds" Kanda threatened.
"I know what you are but what am I?" Lavi mocked again.
"A MORON!" Kanda yelled.
"I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE BUT WHAT AM I?" Lavi repeated.
"YOU'RE AN IDIOT!" Kanda yelled.
They both say at the same time, "I know what you are but what am I??" a bunch of times.
"I know you what you are but what am I times infinity!" screams Lavi. Kanda had the Look of Oh Shit... but only for a moment.
"THAT'S IT YOUR DEAD." Kanda yelled, brandishing Mugen
"oh shit." Lavi deadpanned.
--FLASHBACK END!--" Kanda finished.
The big screen turned off.
"Where did that TV come from?" asked V-chan, she looked at Emily who smiled at her like an idiot.
"Never Mind." the author didn't want to know.
"Okay, this next question will probably get us killed. DON'T KILL US KANDA!" said Emily, V-chan got the shelter ready. "Maybe" he said.
"Um, okay." V-chan and Emily replied unsurely.
"You tell him." "No you!" the two girls were arguing over who'd ask the question.
"I'll do it. I just remembered Kanda couldn't hurt us here!" V-chan said with a Fuji Syusuke smile on. Emily went to the Kitchen.
"Okay, the question is from whiteninjaachemist. She says 'I want to know if Kanda is a girl in disguised or a boy looking like a girl
Ps. I like Kanda and Allen plus Lavi more than other people.' " V-chan asked.
It took all the self control Kanda had to NOT kill the asker and V-chan. Instead, he yelled... really loud, OUR POOR EARS! TToTT
"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?!"
"I don't know." V-chan said, scratching her head. Emily got Lemonade for everyone... but she replaced the sugar with salt. Everyone spit out there drink, Skin was crying again because there was no sugar in the drink.
There was a very long silence.
"THEN WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ASKING IT??" Kanda roared with multiple veins bulging out.
"Cuz they asked." was Emily's oh so obvious answer.
"Just answer it dummy." V-chan said, rather annoyed.
"I'M A BOY DUMBASSES!" Kanda yelled.
"So basically, you're a very girly guy." Emily said, V-chan was amazed Emily was so blunt towards someone who could become a potential serial killer. V-chan nodding in affirmation anyway.
Still with veins popping out, Kanda barely nodded yes. (OMG)
"Thank you. Was that so hard?" Emily asked.
Another nod
"Okay, before Kanda bursts," V-chan said, pointing at the VERY ticked Japanese, "We'll move on."
"So, these are from Jinai. The first one is to Jasdebi. It is, 'Why do they stay as twins all the time, when they could be one person? Wouldn't it be easier?' " Emily said.
Jasdebi had a weird grin on. "We stay as twins because-" Jasdero started. "We couldn't annoy the hell outta Skin and Tyki." David finished.
"Nice to know you care." Tyki said, with veins popping. Skin had veins popping and was ready to hurt the twins when V-chan popped up and stopped him with candy.
"Now now, if you hurt each other here, we're not responsible for aftermaths." she said.
Usually, the Noah's would ignore her, but her expression, which was very, VERY scary Fuji Syusuke style stopped them.
"Okay, onto the next question!" V-chan yelled. "It says, 'Kanda doesn't seem to be interested in anything else than Mugen, so my question is, if he ever went to school? Or was educated any other way? Does he even know how to write and read!?
Don't get me wrong, Kanda is one of my fav. characters, but this question has
been bugging me ever since. it's also important for me to know for my own ff
-german, not published, sucks, what else to say- and those are the little, but important things to know."
Once again, Kanda was pissed. He reluctantly answered after he remembered V-chan's warning.
"I did get some education, but Akuma attacked before I could finish it." (I'm not really sure, this is what I believe. Although, Hoshino-sensei said Lenalee is the smartest, followed by Lavi, then Allen, and lastly Kanda).
Emily nodded, and continued on with, "Okay, now they want to know if anything ticks Lenalee off besides Koumi's overprotectiveness."
"Well, besides Koumi's overprotectiveness, which doesn't bother me much," Lenalee started, "when my friends fight while putting themselves in danger" insert glare at Allen, who sweat dropped, "nothing really ticks me off." she finished with a smile.
"Nice to know, alright next is for Lavi. Jinai asks 'Can you quit being a bookman and become a full exorcist. I think it's really annoying sometimes, the duties of a bookman, the rules of being a
bookman, the importance of staying alone, blah blah blah. Did you sign anything or what? Can't bookman just get someone else to be his successor? Sorry, but this really ticks me off.' " V-chan asked, gasping for breath at the end.
"Well, I swore I'd become a Bookman, so I have to fulfill my promise. It's kinda annoying, but I don't mind. No, I didn't sign anything. Besides, I don't think anyone else would willingly become Bookman and erase their identity like me." Lavi explained.
"Wow, nice to know. Anyway, the last question is to Bak. 'Did Likei blackmail him for his Lenalee-Obsession (y'know, he DID find out, before Allen got his Crown Clown)? So, did he use it against him? evilgrin' " Emily asked.
"No. I've managed to get him to shut up, but he'll crack soon I know it." Bak said.
"Whew! Finally done. Well, everyone can now eat dinner, since it's really late." V-chan started.
"But! This time, you have to eat..." Emily continued.
"WASABI ROLLS!", they yelled in unison. (V-chan - tribute to Fuji Syuuske, the awesome sadist that I adore!)
Everyone knew better to complain, and just ate the rolls, but not without yelling from the spiciness. Except for the Earl and Cross, cause they're too cool for that.
Finally, they went to sleep.
Jasdebi & Lulubelle were screaming and the rest of the Noahs and the Earl were sleeping contentedly.
The exorcists were sleeping well.
V-chan and Emily were plotting more evil things to do.
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (in your face)
V-chan - WER'E DONE!! Finally. Well, the poll is going well. 'All of them' are winning, followed by Jasdebi & the earl in second.
Emily - Yeah! So vote! The poll ends in 6/2. It'll probably happen in the next chapter.
V-chan - Big thanks to Jinai and JenLawliet. And congrats to Jinai, an anonymous reviewer, who asked the first Noah related question!
Also, I'm gonna delete the 'All of Them' option like an hour after this is posted.
JA NE!