Chapter 4: CONFUSION
I'm sitting in a room with a table and four chairs and a half gone cup of cold coffee (two sugars, three creams), one good light bulb, and two blue suits who wanna play good cop worse cop with me. They don't know what worse is.
"C'mon Carnalli, talk!"
I tell them I've told them everything there is to be told.
"Why'dja do it Carnalli?
Why'dja fuck yer mama, blue boy.
I'm not in a good mood. I don't particularly like coffee. I don't particularly like cops. I don't particularly like being awake at three in the morning, especially when I need to be somewhere other than a police station.
"When do I get my phone call? Oh wait! I'm not under arrest! So why am I playing with you two goons?" I stand up.
"Sit your ass down, pal."
I stay standing. I dare the guy with the gun to try and put me in the seat. Come on, spunk monkey! You got the jewels to back it up? Try me! Come on!
Blue boy one pulls a gun. Blue boy two pulls one too.
"I said sit."
"Big tough man with a gun. Tough guy talkin' big with a loaded weapon."
"I SAID SIT!"
You don't think he's mad, do you? I sit. I stand back up, messing with them. They've earned it, slug monkeys.
"Are you deaf or stupid? I said sit!"
"I'm not deaf and I'm not stupid. What I am is pissed off that I'm here at the buttcrack of dawn, talking with two intellectually bereft spunk monkeys with chips on their shoulders, being accused of a crime that I witnessed but didn't commit. I'm being held against my will, I haven't been given a phone call, and I'm fuckin' leaving!"
Blue boy one puts his gun in my face. "I said sit," he whispers through clenched teeth. "I'm not messing around here."
"You're not? Good! Neither am I."
Before he can think about doing anything, I grab his gun hand and slam it into his own face - wham. Blue boy two pulls back the hammer on his piece. I turn and stare at him. I bend over a little so that the barrel is right between my eyes from a distance of less than a foot.
"Go on, blue boy, pull the trigger. Kill an innocent unarmed man."
Blue boy one is on the floor screaming about his nose being broke.
"You assaulted a police officer!"
"I disarmed a punk who's too tired to be holding a gun right now."
"You bloke m' fuggin doze you tonofabidge!"
"Shaddap." I give him a little nudge with my toe in his ribs. He screams. Whatta wuss.
"I'm warning you, sit down Mr. Carnalli!" Blue boy two actually thinks he's serious.
"Look, did you bother to fingerprint the pipe that was in the alley? The one the guy dropped that actually committed the crime?"
Blue boy two is silent, letting that one roll around in his empty noggin for a bit. Blue boy one is trying to sit up. He's definitely got a broke nose and a pretty good shiner to boot. Do I feel sorry for him? Look me in the face, slug monkey.
"Did you?" I ask again. "You didn't, did you? Didn't think so. Stupid ass..." I turn away from blue boy two and head to the door.
The door opens and in walks some fat guy holding a cup of coffee and a manila folder. He's wearing a shoulder strap that holds a really nice looking .357. He reminds me a little of Ned Beatty, that guy from Deliverance. Squeal like a pig boy. Haha I make joke.
"And where do you think you're going?" pig boy asks.
"I'm leaving. I've answered your questions. You have no reason to hold me. I'm leaving."
"You'll sit down or you'll be charged with assaulting an officer and obstruction of justice."
"Obstruct this." The bird flies high and I walk out. Pig boy knows that he's all bluff and bluster, that he couldn't make it stick with a glue tube and a bag of Mankind's thumbtacks. He knows there's videotape of two cops pulling fire on an unarmed man who hasn't even been charged with a crime. I may take bumps for a living, but my brains aren't scrambled yet. They know they can't scare me if I don't let them, cause they don't have the power to scare me.
"Mr. Carnalli, can I call you a cab?"
"You can call me whatever the hell you want to. I'm still leaving."
"Ok, but could you answer me one question before you go?"
I turn around. I'm trying to be patient but my Tired has bodyslammed my Patience almost into submission. Once more, and Angry comes out with his buddy Uncontrollable Violence. "What?" I hiss, venom dripping.
"Do you have anyone in your life - anyone at all - that hates you bad enough to frame you for murder?"
I'm silent. I look at pig boy. He's not squealing. He's looking in the manila folder. He's drinking his coffee. He's looking back at me. Wonder what he sees?
"Well?"
"I honestly don't know."
"So you're saying that there COULD be somebody."
"Possibly. I'm too tired to really think clearly about it all."
"Care to talk?"
"Not especially."
"Sure?"
I stand there. I stand there and stare at pig boy. Look me in the face, slug monkey, do I look like I want to talk?
"OK. I'm gonna give you my card. Would you please give me a call when you get into San Francisco, after you've had a shower and some sleep preferably."
I take the white card with blue writing. Detective Leonard Sanders. I flick the card with a finger and stuff it in my front pocket.
"There's a squad car waiting up front for you to take you to the airport."
I'm uneasy about this. What's up with this guy?
"We made sure to grab your personal items from the hotel you were staying at. You should just make your flight."
I look at my watch. 4:57. Holy shit.
"I'll call you." I walk out.