APOV
For the last month, I'd been pursuing Jasper Hale with every trick in my book. I'd dressed up, I'd dressed down, I'd flirted and schemed; nothing worked.
Jasper was completely oblivious to me, unless he was looking at me with that stern disapproval that always showed up whenever Rose and I would get into trouble. I sighed as I tried to come up with a better plan to get his attention, knowing that it would have to be the mother of all my schemes in order to seduce him once and for all.
After our knock-down-drag-out fight we'd had over the pact between Rosalie and myself, I'd become even more aware of him than before. The part of me that always held back in shyness and uncertainty when he was around had suddenly disappeared sometime between the yelling and me tackling him to the ground as I tried to get my list back.
He was able to dominate me easily, rolling so that he had me pinned to the ground with his entire body. The heat was incredible, but he didn't seem to notice in the least. It was at that moment that I swore to myself that Jasper Hale was going down, and I would be the one taking him there.
His snooty attitude toward me always left me feeling depressed and filthy, reminding me of the way kids used to treat me when my mother and I were poor before she'd married my insanely rich stepfather.
Not many people knew about my past, aside from Bella and Rosalie, and I wanted to keep it that way. Wearing hand-me-down clothes and living off of Top Ramen was a far cry from wearing Dolce and Gabbana while sipping champagne, and none of the rich bitches at this school were ever going to find out where I'd come from. I mean, just look at how they treated Bella. Her family wasn't even poor; they were middle class, with a comfortable life even though they'd sent Bella to Whitlock Academy for Girls on a scholarship.
I was insanely lucky, and I knew it. I just didn't ever want to become one of the trust fund bitches who thought they were better than everyone else, and I definitely didn't need Jasper Fucking Filthy Rich Hale making me feel like a piece of gum on his designer shoes.
So it was with disappointment and determination that I set about to seduce my best friend's sexy stuck up know-it-all of a twin brother. I called Bella and convinced her to come to the coffee shop where I knew he spent most of his days after school, pretending like he was Lord Byron incarnate of the Starbucks generation.
I had weapons of mass destruction in my arsenal, and I wasn't afraid to use them. My closet was stuffed full of Agent Provocateur, and no guy in their right mind would turn down seeing me decked out in these skimpy pieces of lace.
Of course, I'd have to somehow get him here and get him alone long enough to see me undressed, but I would think about that later. Right now, I just needed to boost my self-esteem with knowing that I was wearing something sinful beneath my clothes. I settled on a creamy ivory bra and thong set that barely covered anything at all. The lace on the bra cups stopped just shy of my nipples and pushed my breasts up and together, creating a small but noticeable amount of cleavage that would be revealed by my black sweater.
I threw on a tight skirt that hugged the curves of my surprisingly rounded ass and pulled on my black patent leather high heeled boots before perfecting my hair and makeup.
Jasper, you silly fool. How dare you try to make me feel like I'm not good enough for your world!
Bella met up with me, her eyebrows barely rising at the sight of my outfit. I just shook my head and focused, trying to pretend that I wasn't suddenly filled with nerves beneath the single-minded focus dominating my every thought.
The cafe was busy, but I found Jasper quickly. Bella wasn't in on my plan, so she thought I would want to avoid Jasper. I got in my battle stance and made my way over to him, anticipating his ultimate resistance.
I hardly noticed Edward and Bella's timely exit as I leaned over him, letting my breasts brush against his back as he sat at the table. His head snapped up as I whispered seductively in his ear. Jasper's back and neck stiffened. Good.
Figuring I'd put enough pressure on him for the moment, I pulled my chair up to his and gave him a wide smile full of challenge. Jasper merely frowned at me. "What are you doing here?" he asked with grumpy distaste.
I felt my heart plummet into my stomach, but I valiantly pushed the sickness away and notched my chin up higher to show he couldn't intimidate me. "Some greeting, Jazz," I said sarcastically.
His beautiful blue eyes were dark and angry, and I wondered why he could possibly hate me so much. Since the first time I'd met him, all I'd wanted was for him to be as head over heels for me as I was for him. His reluctance to be around me had morphed into an obvious dislike in the past few months, and I just couldn't understand why he had to be so rude all the time.
"If you're looking for someone to listen to you drone on about all your boring shit, you're lookin' at the wrong person," he muttered, his slight Southern accent becoming apparent. Rosalie had carefully banished every last trace of hers, because she hated being pegged as the Southern belle she was.
I found it incredibly sexy when his drawl came out, but it rarely ever happened because the Hales had been living up north for most of Jasper and Rosalie's lives at this point. Still, his words cut me as I wondered if he truly thought I was full of "boring shit."
"Way to be an asshole, Jasper," I said petulantly, examining my nails with disinterest. My heart may have cracked, but I would never let this stubborn jerk know how he'd hurt me.
He sighed, looking slightly apologetic. "Look, Alice, I don't have time for this right now. I have my own shit to worry about, and whatever you have going on with my sister and that stupid contest is just going to piss me off, so I'd rather not talk about it if you don't mind," he said wearily.
I sat up ramrod straight in my chair, grabbing my purse and glaring at him. "Fine, if you don't want to have a civil conversation with me, then I'll be on my way. I'm so sorry I bothered to be nice to you!" I hissed as I threw my bag over my shoulder and stormed out of the cafe without a backward glance.
Slamming into my bedroom, I threw myself across my bed and tried to hold back the bitter tears threatening to spill over. I was so full of fury and hurt that I couldn't separate my jumbled thoughts. I wanted Jasper, and I wanted to kill Jasper at the same time. I hated that he could make me feel like this. Why did he treat me like this? What had I ever done to him, to cause this animosity he held for me?
I heard the door slam open and shut again, but I didn't care enough to get up and see who it was. I knew the quicker I got out of here, the better. I didn't want my roommates to see me like this, because I wasn't ready for their questions.
I pulled myself together and made a quick exit to the school's library. I snagged a table and spread my schoolbooks out to make people think I was studying, but I was actually going into hyper-planning mode. Jasper was gonna be mine if I had to strap him down and fuck the resistance out of him.
Hmm, that may be a good idea, I thought to myself. I quickly pulled out a pad of paper and a pen, preparing to take notes. I would need to organize this with the help of either Bella or Rosalie. I smiled devilishly as the plan began to take form in the front of my mind. This was going to be good.
A week later, my plan was in place. I'd enlisted Rosalie without explaining my reasons. I knew Bella's curious nature would require her to ask too many questions; the beauty of Rosalie was that she was too self-involved to really give a shit about anyone but herself most of the time.
I sat there on her bed as she dialed Jasper's number. I heard his deep voice come over the line, and I began to sweat as I crossed my fingers. I prayed that this would work. "Jasper, I need you to pick up those stupid books I borrowed from you for that school assignment. They're taking up room," Rosalie bitched as soon as he was done greeting her.
Perfect. I knew I could count on Rose's ability to lie and pull it off with panache. Jasper's irritated grumble came back, and she huffed incredulously. "I said I need you to pick them up, and I mean now. Not tomorrow, not on Thursday. I want these things gone, because I have a date tonight and I don't want him thinking I'm some fucking Civil War geek," she hissed.
Jasper must have agreed because she flashed me a victorious smile and a thumbs up. She hung up and turned to me, saying, "Okay, he'll be here. I'm going to class, so I won't be here. Why the hell do you wanna talk to him, anyway?"
I shifted, anticipating this possible question. "Because I feel bad about that fight a couple months ago, and he's been a dick to me ever since so I feel like I should apologize," I replied, not quite meeting her eyes.
"Whatever," she said, obviously already bored with things that had nothing to do with her. Gotta love Rosalie and her honesty, you know?
I watched her leave, trying to look like I wasn't having major spasms in my chest. As soon as she was gone, I ran to my room at top speed and took the quickest shower I'd ever had in my life. I scrubbed, I smoothed, I lotioned and potioned until I was perfection embodied.
My hair and makeup took longer, but I knew that they didn't need to look perfect for what I was planning, only enough to be flattering. I hurried to dress accordingly before taking one last look around my room to be sure everything was set up the way I wanted it.
This was by far the riskiest scheme I'd ever cooked up, and I just prayed that it would work or I would be forever screwed. Jasper wouldn't just cease to exist; he would be around for as long as I was friends with his twin sister.
I battled back the nerves as I lay down on the bed, breathing deeply. Jasper lived in the dorms at Masen, which was only about forty minutes from here. He should be here any minute, and I was dying in anticipation.
I heard a firm knock on the door, and I smiled. Show time.
I took one last peek at myself in the mirror before lying back on the bed. I was wearing my absolute favorite lingerie from Agent Provocateur, and I knew I looked fantastic. The bra wasn't even really a bra, considering the fact it only covered the underside of my breasts for the most part. It had a firm set of bones inside that pushed the girls up and together, just the way I liked them. The matching underwear was cute and sexy at the same time. The black lace set off against the paleness of my skin, complementing my dark hair.
The door clicked open quietly, and I knew it was time to get down to business. I tossed my head back on the bed, grabbing my vibrator and spreading my legs. I pushed the lace between my legs aside and started rubbing myself with the sex toy, moaning as I felt the sudden gush of moisture.
I began imagining the look on Jasper's face when he inevitably came to investigate the noise, only to find me fucking myself with my little purple friend. I snickered mischievously to myself, biting my lip to keep quiet.
I heard his footsteps creeping around the living area, obviously trying to find Rose. I began to thrash around a bit, moaning in earnest now. I allowed my sounds to get a bit louder as I felt the hormones kick in. The footsteps paused and I smiled wickedly, knowing it was only a matter of time.
I saw his face in my mind, so strong and proud. I pretended his eyes would sparkle at me with his lust, and I imagined him touching me all over. My moans became breathy and I brought my legs up, bending at the knees so I could plant my feet on the bed.
My bedroom was situated so that the bed was facing the doorway. My body was spread out, aimed directly at the door so I would be the first thing Jasper would see upon entering.
"Mmm, Jasper," I moaned, feeling downright diabolical. He would surely have to hear that, considering the fact that his footsteps had stopped not too far away from my bedroom door. I'd left it open a crack, wide enough so he could be able to see inside.
"Oh Jasper! Yes, just like that!" I moaned, my eyes clenching shut as I really got into the charade.
I heard my door creak open a bit. I kept my eyes shut, the very picture of distraction in my task. I kept breathing his name in rapture, knowing he was close by.
I heard a sharp intake of breath. Gotcha! I never let the triumph show on my face. Instead, I bolted upright on my bed, my hand flying to my chest and my eyes widening in a very believable show of shock.
"Oh my God!" I shouted, my mouth hanging open, along with my legs. No way would I cut off the view Jasper currently seemed fixated upon.
He stood there, his blue eyes burning as his mouth hung open. His arms hung limply at his sides, his chest heaving. My eyes drifted lower, and I smirked as I took in the most glorious sight I'd ever seen.
Jasper had a raging boner, and it was too easy to see pressed against his zipper. I couldn't help but lick my lips, anticipating my next move.
"Jasper? What are you doing here?" I asked breathlessly.
"Uhhhh... I...ummmm...I'm..." he replied dumbly. His eyes never left the spot between my legs. I began to wonder if it was even necessary to take the plan to the next level.
"Use your words. Surely you've seen a naked girl before," I replied, letting the amusement show on my face.
Jasper's eyes finally rose to mine, and I saw the dark red flush across his cheeks. "I'm...I heard...you were...and I was just...trying to find Rosalie," he finished lamely.
My eyes roamed around my room before coming back to his. "Well, I don't see her in here. Do you?" I asked, knowing I was milking this.
"Uh, um, no," he said, his eyes returning to my body. I saw his hands clench into fists at his sides, and I felt an answering clenching deep in my abdomen. His legs carried him further into the room, and I reclined back onto the bed on my elbows, keeping my legs spread slightly.
"You were...doing stuff," he said, looking and sounding like an idiot. "to yourself. And you said my name," he finished, a look of confusion and awe on his face.
"Caught that, did ya? What if I said you're not the only Jasper I know?" I asked, my eyebrows rising in question as I made eye contact with him. "Besides, I doubt you would ever do the things he does to me," I said, driving the point home.
His own eyebrows lowered over his eyes as he grimaced, and I wondering if he was embarrassed. "Unbelievable," he muttered under his breath. His eyes were glued to my body, roaming over my naked breasts and exposed stomach. He stood next to me, his left hand tentatively reaching out toward my legs.
"Hey, now, cowboy. Just because the goods are displayed doesn't mean you can fondle the merchandise," I admonished.
Jasper's eyes snapped back up to mine and I decided to take it up a notch. I gave him a seductive smile, one eyebrow quirking as I moved my thigh so it brushed against his outstretched hand. He was so absorbed in staring back at me that he jumped when my skin made contact with his.
His eyes returned to my thighs and his hand reached out, his fingers drifting along my pale white skin. His hands were tanned and rough in places, and I bit my lip to keep the whimper inside. This is exactly what I'd always wanted when it came to Jasper, and it was finally happening.
We both watched in silence as Jasper's hand slid along the top of my leg, dipping slightly between my legs when he reached the apex of my thigh. His had retreated a bit and he brought his other one up to rub along the opposite leg. He leaned over the bed, a look of intense concentration on his handsome face.
I couldn't stop looking at him if my life depended on it.
Slowly, so slowly, his hands became firmer as they explored my legs. A tiny moan escaped my mouth and he looked at me with determination on his face. "Jasper, you say?" he growled before climbing on the bed.
His hands brushed back up to my thighs and pried them apart forcefully. He brought himself up onto his knees and walked up the bed to stop right between my legs. His hands remained on me, his fingers digging deliciously into the flesh on my thighs.
He leaned his torso into mine, his electric blue eyes locked on mine. I held my breath as his breath fanned across my face. "I don't think so," he whispered, almost menacingly.
My arms began to shake with the effort of keeping me up on my elbows. I allowed myself to collapse back on the bed, and Jasper hovered over me with ominous intent.
When I'd concocted this plan, I'd always been the one in control in my fantasies. To me, Jasper was the unwilling participant that would need convincing and guidance. I never in a million years thought he would actually dominate this situation.
I felt the nerves crawling around my belly, and I found it hard to breathe with his face so close to mine. I brushed my tongue over my bottom lip, completely aware of his erection pressing into my soaked underwear through his cargo pants. His eyes never left mine as he came ever closer....closer...closer...
And then he did it. He kissed me. Except it wasn't like I'd dreamed; it was so much more. The intensity and fierceness were a surprise, because I'd always pegged Jasper as a gentleman who treated ladies like glass figurines.
Maybe it was just me that he treated like this, but at the moment, I couldn't find it in me to care because the heat was so incredible. His lips moved on mine with purpose, and to deny him at this point would mean killing myself. I brought my hands up to fist in his silky blond hair, enjoying the curls wrapped around my fingers. I pulled him closer, wrapping my legs around him in a vice-like fashion.
Jasper arched into me heavily, letting me feel his massive erection. I whimpered, hoping he would let me have every single inch of it.
My virginity was a fond memory, as far as I was concerned. There was simply no way I could let him get away from me, now that I had him locked and loaded and ready to go.
This man was a danger to my sanity.
His hands began to wander, his palms cupping my breasts roughly. His thumbs rubbed over my painfully erect nipples and I bowed up into him with wild abandon. His tongue forced its way into my mouth and began its quest for domination, mirroring the movements he was making with the rest of his body.
He ground his hips into mine as his hands continued palming my entire torso thoroughly. His fingers raked my sides, his mouth leaving mine to seal onto my neck. I felt his lips and teeth working to mark the delicate skin, and I wondered what he would do when the others inevitably asked about the massive hickey I would surely be sporting later.
Jasper's harsh breathing became louder as he pulled himself up to rake his eyes downward, taking in my lingerie once more. "Jesus. You, in this...It's like you fucking read my mind or something," he muttered.
"What's that?" I asked, wondering if he'd really just said what I thought he did.
"Nothing," he grumbled before pushing up onto his knees so he could have more access. His hands pulled the bra down so my breasts were completely exposed to his hungry eyes. He wasn't done, however, because his hands dropped down to my panties, shoving them down and off my legs without ceremony.
He smiled in triumph, determination glowing in his eyes. He began to mount me once more, but I pushed up against his chest and gave him a stern look. "I'm completely naked and you're completely clothed. No. Fucking. Way," I ground out.
My shaking hands pushed up beneath his yellow t-shirt to rub along his lean torso. His abs were solid and defined, but not overly so. He was fit from all his extracurricular sports over at Masen, and I was definitely appreciating his efforts currently. My hands reached up to wrap around his sides, pulling him back down to me as I pulled his shirt over his head. His deliciously warm, bare chest collided with mine as I claimed his mouth with extreme hunger.
Our tongues dueled, our hands gripped each other, and I pushed against him in desperation. He was letting loose with little groans and deep breaths of his own, and I found myself anticipating the sound of my name falling from his perfect lips.
"Jasper, I need you," I whispered, my tongue and teeth teasing his earlobe. Jasper moaned, his cock digging into my pelvic bone. I decided then that the pants needed to get lost, because I was about to light them on fire if they thought they could come between me and my utmost desire.
I wriggled my hands between us, my hands finding his fly and making quick work of it. I reached around, my hands gripping his ass beneath his pants. His hot breath was moist on my neck as he licked and nipped at my collarbone. I dropped my legs from around his waist and used my feet to push his pants down his legs.
The good news was this motion caused my clit to rub up against his now exposed pubic hair. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, whining in my throat at the sensation. "No underwear, huh?" I asked when I could breathe again.
Jasper smiled wickedly at me, his fierce concentration breaking for a moment. "Underwear is girls," he replied huskily.
I smiled, pulling his mouth back to mine. His taste was better than chocolate cake, and I wanted nothing more than to feast on his flavor all day long. My hands pulled on his hair, my open thighs rubbing along his now naked legs. I could feel the hair on his legs brushing against my skin, and I shivered at the feel.
There were no more clothes between us, and all I had ever wished for since meeting this insanely sexy man was about to come true. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, my tiny frame engulfed by his much taller one. I planted my feet on the bed and pushed myself against him in earnest, my eyes trying to convey just how much I wanted him in that moment.
"Please, Jasper," I whispered, whimpering with my need.
"I need a condom," he said, his voice rough with his own passion.
"I'm on the pill," I replied, not looking at him.
Jasper required no more argument as he gripped my hips and plunged into me. The pain was immediate and intense, and I gasped in agony. His eyes widened and he looked completely stunned.
"Were you a...?" he asked, shock evident in his tone.
"Yes, you idiot! How could you not know that?" I hissed, my body revolting against his length still buried to the hilt inside me.
His eyes darkened and he looked at me with dismay. "Alice... I didn't know," he said quietly.
I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I tried to hide my emotional and physical discomfort. Jasper's face dropped, his eyes full of remorse. The pain was slowly beginning to recede, but he was well endowed and I was a very petite girl. I felt the moisture from my earlier passion beginning to dry up, and things were becoming unpleasant.
"Are you okay?" he asked finally, his tone concerned. I couldn't see his eyes.
"I would be, but the mood is totally killed now," I said sourly.
I felt his lips on the underside of my jaw, brushing gently. My breath caught as his hands began to massage my body wherever he could reach. His lower body stayed completely still as he began to kiss and touch as gently as I had always imagined he would.
His lips met mine and our breath mingled as he kissed me deeply, softly, slowly. His hands brushed against my breasts, teasing my nipples with none of the former fury and passion. He was soothing me and turning me on all at the same time. I began to relax into him once more, my body slowly responding to his ministrations.
The moisture returned and the need in me built to a fevered pitch as Jasper continued to touch me with apparent awe and appreciation. His eyes were kinder, warmer. His mouth held a tiny smile and he held himself apart from me in concentration that seemed different from before.
After a time, his eyes met mine. "Ready?" he asked softly. I nodded, knowing what he was asking of me.
He began to move in me, his solid length stretching every inch inside of me. I felt nothing but pleasure this time, greatly overshadowing any lingering soreness I may have experienced. His mouth brushed along my neck, peppering me with wet, open-mouthed kisses.
I felt the need building inside of me as he continued to thrust into me gently, claiming me as his. I felt branded by Jasper's body, and I reveled in it. I latched onto him, allowing myself to let go a bit. His body was covered in a sheen of perspiration from his careful effort to seduce me thoroughly and sweetly.
His efforts were not in vain. My orgasm built as he locked his eyes onto mine, his mouth finding my lips and nibbling on them. He was so fucking sexy with his deep blue eyes and curly tawny blond hair. I couldn't keep my hands to myself, instead allowing them to roam over his chest and back with glee.
"Alice..." he breathed, his voice low and pained. Finally! I thought, the joy spreading in my chest.
"Jasper," I replied, just as breathlessly.
"You feel...so...good. I think I'm gonna..." he groaned, his arms pushing up beside my face so he could thrust in earnest now.
"Me...too..." I squealed right before my vaginal walls clamped down around his throbbing cock. I could feel his thrusts becoming weaker as he let me ride my orgasm out.
"That's right, come for me baby. Come for me," he breathed into my ear, biting on the lobe.
After my orgasm was over, Jasper pushed back onto his heels and brought my legs up alongside his hips. He brought my left leg up, extending it so my foot was next to his ear. I giggled tiredly, still lost n his amazing sexiness.
Jasper pounded into me with abandon now, his face locked into an expression of intense pleasure. My name was wrenched from his lungs a few more times, and each time I relished it.
Just as I was getting sore, Jasper stiffened and grunted as he spilled his seed inside of me. His fingers dug into my hips, and I hoped they'd leave bruises for me to delight over later after he left. I wanted everyone to know that I was Jasper Hale's woman. This just felt so right.
Once he was done, he collapsed on the bed beside me. I watched his chest heave as he breathed heavily. I rolled over and laid half on top of him, my arms crossed along his back. The joy was rapidly spreading through my veins like a fast-acting poison, and it was easy to forget my earlier plan to seduce Jasper and turn around to rub it in his pompous face.
Because I'd forgotten why we were here, doing this. I forgot not to let my heart get involved as I tried to prove that I was just as good as him, no matter what he may have thought. I couldn't even think about that right now, lying here naked and thoroughly sated.
My lips ran over his sweaty shoulders, tasting him. I wanted knowledge of every inch when it came to him, and I knew my heart was lost. I shut my eyes, feeling myself drift along on the cloud of contentment surrounding me.
We dozed for awhile. I stayed on top of Jasper, but he didn't seem to mind. His breath evened out as he relaxed and I felt comforted by the sound of his strong heartbeat. This was heaven for me, and I steadfastly ignored the stray thoughts wondering when this perfect moment would end.
All too soon, it did. Jasper began to stir, and pushed himself up a bit. His movements displaced me, and I rolled onto the bed so I could snuggle into my blankets. The room was chilly now with the loss of his incredible body heat.
He looked down into my face, and I smiled up at him cautiously. "Wow, Alice. I never would have thought..." he began, running his hand through his messy sex hair.
"Never would have thought what?" I asked, curious.
"Well, I mean, when I figured out the plan was for you guys to lose your virginity, I never thought it was actually true. I mean, I know Rosalie's a virgin because she's my sister and I would have killed any guy to touch her, and I figured Bella must be one because she's so shy..." he trailed off, a look of concentration on his face, as if he were trying to figure out a complicated puzzle.
My muscles stiffened as I realized what he was getting at. I sat up rigidly, bringing the sheet up to cover my naked breasts. I couldn't confront him while I was completely nude. "Oh, so what? You thought I was just some whore going around fucking guys and daring my friends to do the same?" I said through gritted teeth.
He looked surprised. "What? No! I mean, I just figured you would have already done...this... because you're always so confident around guys. I thought maybe..."
"So having confidence around guys means I must not be a virgin? Are you really that much of a backwater asshole?" I growled, my voice rising another notch.
"Hey! You're the one always conning my sister into your stupid little fucking games! You always get her into trouble, and it's like you don't even care!" he yelled back, sitting up onto his knees so he could tower over me on the bed.
"Let me get this straight; you think that I get Rosalie into trouble just for the hell of it, and you think that I'm 'conning' my best friends into losing their virginity so that I won't be the only slut in this household? Is that correct?" I hissed, my eyes narrowing dangerously on his.
Jasper climbed off the bed now, not bothering to look at me. I watched as he picked up his clothes, yanking them on with restrained violence. He was muttering darkly to himself, not bothering to respond.
"I'm fucking talking to you, asshole!" I yelled, my face completely mottled with rage now.
He spun around, his eyes boring into mine. "Whatever this was, Alice, it was a one-time thing. As far as I'm concerned, you're nothing more than a vapid little girl with a credit card and a bad habit of getting her friends into trouble. All you care about are you stupid shoes and your stupid games, and I'm fucking tired of it," he said, his voice deadly.
My heart shattered in that moment, a thousand glass shards stabbing me from the inside. I gasped, my head spinning from the venom spewing from his mouth. "You know what this was, Jasper? This was me fucking showing you that you're not so perfect yourself. I'm not some piece of crap stuck to your shoe; I'm a fucking human being. I've been in love with you since the first day I met you, and all I ever wanted was for you to feel the same.
In the end, apparently all you are is a cold-hearted bastard who doesn't see anything beyond his own fucking nose! You're standing there calling me vapid and accusing me of all these things, and yet you don't even bother to take a good long look at yourself!" I yelled, my voice shaking as I laid myself bare in front of him.
Jasper's eyebrows snapped low over his stormy blue eyes. I watched his cheeks flush with anger before he turned and stormed out of my room, not even bothering to look at me.
I collapsed on the bed, shaken and ruined. Just moments ago, I'd felt like all was right in my world because Jasper Hale was in my bed.
Now, I felt as if the world had exploded and I was left behind with nothing to show for my previous bliss except a few purplish marks along my hipbones and a big red hickey on my neck. I curled into a ball, bringing the comforter up to wrap around my suddenly freezing body.
I don't know how long I stayed like that, but the shadows eventually overtook my room as I laid there with a blank expression on my face. My heart had bled out and gone numb after some time, and my cheeks were dry after all the tears were cried.
I heard the door open and close, and I tried to bury my head under my pillow. I'd forgotten to close my bedroom door, so it still stood open as it had when Jasper stormed through it earlier.
Rosalie's voice calling my name drifted through the suite, and she eventually knocked on my door. I pretended to be asleep, but she decided to come in and shake me anyway. "Alice, what are you doing asleep? It's only five o'clock! Are you sick?" she asked, her hand on my shoulder.
I grunted, trying to get her to go away. Rosalie wasn't one for personal boundaries, however. She yanked the pillow up off my face and gasped when she saw my red blotchy face and bloodshot eyes. "What the hell happened to you?" she asked in a raised voice.
"Nothing," I croaked, my throat raw from my sobs.
"Alice Mary Brandon, you'd better spill it now or I'll just get it out of you some other way. You know I will!" she demanded.
I just rolled so my back was to her, and she hissed her displeasure. I felt her pull the blankets down, exposing my naked back and hips. She must have seen the bruises by now, and I wondered what she would think.
I heard her gasp. "Who did this to you?" she yelled.
I quickly rolled over again, facing her. I didn't want her to think something untrue. "I did this to me. Jasper came over and I..."
"My brother did this?" she shouted, cutting me off.
"Yes, but it wasn't like that! It was consensual," I quickly explained, hoping to calm her down before she did something rash.
"Oh. Well why aren't you lolling around in bliss, then?" she asked, her face a mask of confusion.
"Because it was just a one-time thing, I guess. He obviously doesn't feel the same way about me," I whimpered, my tears beginning anew.
Rosalie sat and brushed my hair out of my face in a rare show of comfort. Her eyes held concern warring with her fierce protective instincts. I knew that Rosalie may be self-involved, but she was always fiercely loyal when it came to those she loved.
"Was he bad to you, Alice? Did he hurt you?" she asked quietly.
"Nooo... I mean, the sex was...great...but it was just things getting all messed up afterwards," I replied, my voice meek. I didn't want to tell her the vile things he'd said about me.
I didn't even want to remember them, myself.
Rosalie sat with me for a time, and I eventually fell asleep for real. I must have been out all night, because I missed dinner and didn't wake up until the next morning for class.
JPOV
There was a heavy pounding on my door, and I looked over at Edward with surprise on my face. He just shrugged and returned to his book, and I sighed. I threw my pencil down and removed my reading glasses as I crossed to the door, knowing exactly who this might be.
"You fucking asshole!" Rosalie screamed as soon as I pulled the door open. She rushed past me, her hair flowing behind her like a battle flag.
Uh oh, I thought. She was in full-blown protector mode, and I was about to get filleted by my very own twin sister.
She glared at Edward and jerked her thumb toward the door, telling him to get the hell out before she threw him out. Edward, being the smart one, quickly gathered his homework and made a swift exit without making further eye contact with the wild animal storming around our dorm room.
"How could you?" she yelled, her hands fisting and yanking at her hair. "How could you fuck my best friend and then be a complete dick to her?!"
I stood back, watching her warily. She had been known to attack in her fits of rage, and I wasn't in the mood to fend off her sharp claws. "What did she tell you?" I finally asked, resigned.
"She didn't tell me much of anything, but I saw the bruises! I saw her face as she fucking cried over your worthless ass!" she shouted, her face red with anger.
I cringed, feeling like a complete monster. I hadn't been gentle with her, at least in the beginning. I'd been forceful and rough, but I couldn't help myself. She'd been so fucking tempting, laying there in that "fuck me" lingerie with her beautiful body displayed for my eyes to devour.
Not to mention the fact that she'd been fucking herself while moaning my name, no matter what she tried to say to the contrary. I knew I should have stayed away from her, but my dick was like some fucking divining rod pointing at the source of water for a man trapped in the desert. I couldn't have left her if I'd tried.
But then, I had. After I'd used her, I'd insulted her and left her without a backward glance. I really was a fucking asshole, but Alice just wasn't my type and I couldn't see a future with someone who took everything in life for granted.
"I know I'm an asshole. I fucked her, okay?" I said, the words raked from my chest. I'd been raised to treat women much better than I'd just treated Alice, and I knew there was no possible excuse good enough to change what I'd done.
"What did you say? I know you said something, Jazz. Tell me." she commanded with her hands on her hips as she leaned forward from the waist to let me know she meant business.
I groaned. "I basically told her she was a stupid little girl with a credit card," I said under my breath.
"You what?!" Rosalie yelled with an incredulous look on her face.
"Yeah, well, it's true, isn't it? I mean, all she cares about is spending her daddy's money and getting herself into trouble," I said, my accent peeking out in my irritation at having to defend myself.
"You are so fucking dense, I'm completely amazed that you can even look at yourself!" she replied, her hands clenching into fists as she stomped across the dorm room to shove me back onto my bed. "Sit down and listen to me, and you'd better listen well because I'm breaking my fucking promise to her by telling you this."
I nodded, confused and afraid of what I'd hear.
"Alice wasn't always rich, and she's definitely not just some stupid girl with a credit card. She grew up dirt fucking poor and it wasn't until she was thirteen that her mom married some rich dude that she had any money at all. She's always careful with her money, and she's never once borrowed any from her parents. They buy her all kinds of shit, but she only ever spends her own money. She's fucking amazing, Jasper, and you don't even see it because you can't be bothered!" she hissed, her eyes stabbing into mine.
I didn't see how she could be telling the truth. "Where does Alice get her money then?" I asked.
"She works, which you wouldn't know anything about because you've never worked a day in your entire life. Now who's the spoiled rich kid?" she yelled, her face full of spite.
I shifted uncomfortably at my words being hurled back in my face. "So, she works. But she still treats everything like it's a joke. She gets you into trouble. You wouldn't even be part of this stupid contest if it weren't for her!" I replied defensively.
Rosalie squealed at this, her hands slapping her cheeks in frustration. "Jasper, I was the one to come up with the fucking Virginity Pact! I'm the one who is tired of being a virgin! It was your precious little baby sister who can do no wrong. Good lord, when are you going to wake up and see that I'm not as perfect as you think I am?" she ground out.
I sat there, stunned. I knew Rosalie never blamed Alice for getting her into trouble, but it never really occurred to me that she would be the one to instigate this whole scheme in the first place. "So why does she always take the blame for everything?" I asked.
"Because that's just how she is. She claims it's because she knows how to get out of bad situations thanks to her shady childhood. I don't know. Alice is just Alice and she knows what she wants," Rosalie replied, her voice calming a bit.
I patted the bed beside myself, and Rosalie came to sit next to me. I slung an arm around her shoulder.
"Remember that time you guys sold those designer knock offs, passing them as originals around the school? Why did you do that?" I asked.
Rosalie grinned, her anger forgotten. "A bunch of girls were making fun of Bella for having a fake Chanel bag. They were teasing her. Alice didn't like it, so she came up with a plan to get back at them by selling the girls fakes and exposing it in front of the school."
I was surprised by this, even though I guess I shouldn't have been by now. Alice was slowly gaining my respect through Rosalie's eyes, and I wondered why I hadn't paid more attention to this before.
"What about the time you guys stole that girl's cell phone and posted dirty pictures of her on the internet?" I asked.
Rosalie snorted and looked directly at me. "Lauren was spreading a rumor around school that she'd fucked you after prom last year. She was going on and on to anyone who would listen, and when Alice called her out on it, she got rude. She claimed you had a small dick and sucked in bed, so she didn't care if you hooked up with her again or not. Alice was totally pissed, so she stole her cell phone and we found pictures of Lauren doing the nasty with Mike Newton. We posted them on the internet and spammed her Myspace profile with links so people would see them."
I gaped, my eyes bulging out of my head. How I'd never heard of this, I had no idea. "Why didn't you guys just tell me so I could deal with it?" I asked.
"Alice wanted to deal with it. She said there was no way Lauren could have had sex with you, because if she had, she wouldn't have one bad thing to say about it," Rosalie replied, looking smug.
Again, I was shocked. Alice had not acted out of petty spite or an aimless need to cause trouble; she had been protecting me. I shook my head in wonder, trying to figure out why I had ever thought poorly of her.
"Then what about this pact, Rose?" I asked softly, hoping she'd explain this to me. I felt shame burning in my gut as I recalled all the accusations I'd hurled at Alice over this stupid game.
She looked down at her lap. "I knew it might be the only way Alice and Bella would ever step up and try to go for what they wanted," she said honestly.
"What do you mean? They wanted to have sex?" I asked, confused.
"Bella's been in love with Edward forever, but she always hid it, even from us. I just hoped we could convince her to go for it, because Bella loves a challenge," she explained.
"And Alice?" I asked, dreading the answer.
Rosalie's identical blue eyes landed on mine. "She's only wanted you," she said quietly.
The regret and anger at myself came crashing down around me at her words, and I cursed. How could I be so blind, believing that Alice was some superficial piece of fluff? She was real; she had a questionable past, but she was loyal and she stood up for the people she cared about. She apparently also had respect for money, which I never would have believed.
After Rose left, I sat on my bed and tried to think about what all this would mean. I'd always been unwillingly attracted to Alice in some deep, dark corner of my mind, but I always kept the thoughts at bay. She was infuriating and we always clashed. I was never able to stand being alone with her, and now I knew why.
I couldn't keep myself in check any longer. Now that I knew the truth about Alice, all I could do was hope that I could find a way to make it up to her for being such an asshole. I flinched, making myself go back over our fight earlier.
The night wore on, and Edward never returned our room so I was all alone. I was grateful because he'd been in a really pissy mood for the past week and I really didn't want to deal with him tonight. I tossed and turned, trying to come up with a satisfactory plan to apologize to Alice.
A week went by, and Edward hardly ever returned home. I couldn't ask him about this, because it just wasn't the guy thing to do. I wanted so badly to get advice, but I had nowhere to turn.
The next couple days, I practically stalked her. It was the weekend, so nobody missed me. I followed her on all her errands, trying to keep an inconspicuous distance. She stopped at a coffee shop for her morning beverage and then went to a bookstore and later to the grocery store. I was disappointed to see her buy He's Just Not That into You, because it reminded me of what a prick I'd been to her.
The most interesting stop she made lasted a couple hours. I watched her walk into a nondescript building that had a simple sign out front, declaring it the "Happy Home." I stood across the street, feeling like a creepy loser for letting myself carry it this far.
I went into a small store across the street to inquire about the place Alice was visiting. According to the lady behind the counter, it was a women's shelter for pregnant teens. I was floored, wondering why Alice would be going there. Frankly, I had no idea, so I asked the lady if she'd ever seen Alice before. I described her in detail, and the woman smiled.
"Oh yes, that's Alice. She's a volunteer over there sometimes. She comes in to take the girls shopping and they have makeovers and movie nights. She brings the kids in here for ice cream sometimes," she said with a fond smile on her face.
I was completely amazed. Alice was so much more than I'd ever realized, and I was suddenly seeing the truth in all of this: I was the one who wasn't good enough for her, not the other way around.
Afterwards, she came walking out with a big smile on her face. I stood frozen, caught in the beauty of that brilliant expression lighting up her entire face; she was beautiful. My distraction caused her to see me before I could hide, and she immediately scowled.
I turned to make a quick escape, but she plowed me down. "What the hell are you doing here?" she hissed as she laid a restraining hand on my arm.
I was just... in the neighborhood," I replied lamely. I resisted the urge to slap my forehead over my own idiocy.
"Sure you were. Why are you here?" she asked again, her brilliant blue eyes burning into mine like flames.
"I wanted to apologize," I said finally.
She looked stunned, but her anger snapped back into place quickly. "For what? For fucking me and ditching me? Or for making me feel like shit?"
I cringed, knowing I deserved her anger. "For both. I'm an asshole, and I never should have said those things to you. I never should have taken advantage of you like that, either. You could have saved yourself for someone you care about," I said sincerely.
"I did," she replied. I heard the double meaning in her words, and I felt the hope flare up to battle with the depression. She had cared about me, but I couldn't see how she would anymore. Not now, especially after I'd done everything in my power to make her feel horrible.
"Alice, you're a wonderful person. You're kind and loyal, generous and sweet. I've been a complete jerk for ignoring everything you are. I thought I knew you, but it turns out that I never really knew you at all. I'm sorry," I said, my eyes beseeching her to forgive me.
Alice's beautiful eyes widened. They began to glisten with tears and I reached out, gripping her upper arms gently. "Please tell me you'll forgive me for being so fucking stupid," I begged.
Her mouth quivered as she searched my eyes for the truth. "Do you really mean it?" she asked quietly, her voice weak.
I gathered her into my arms. "I do," I replied softly into her hair. "If you give me the chance to make it up to you, I promise I will do everything in my power to fix this."
Alice pulled back, her eyes dancing with hope. My chest filled with relief as I smiled down at her tentatively. "Okay," she said as she returned to my arms, pressing her face into my chest.
I hugged her close, bending over her tiny form so I could brush her temple with my lips. "Thank you," I replied, my chest expanding to suck in greedy breaths that carried her tempting scent to my nostrils.
The relief washed over me as I realized that I would get a chance to prove that I was worthy of her. I wanted to get started right away.
We stood there for a time, embracing each other in the middle of the sidewalk. I couldn't get over the fact that she'd forgiven me so quickly. I knew that I didn't deserve someone with such a forgiving heart, so ready to let go of the wrongs done against her.
"Will you come with me? There's something I need to do," I asked, crossing my fingers that she would comply.
"Okay," she said, nodding as she wiped tears from her face. My heart stuttered at the sight of her pain. I resolved to do everything in my power to fix it.
We made the slow walk back to Masen, and I led her up the stairs to my room. Edward wasn't there, and I found a message from him saying he'd be gone for awhile. I breathed a sigh of relief and turned to watch Alice as her eyes scanned my room.
"What is it you need to do, anyway?" she asked me curiously.
I crossed to her, wrapping my arms around her waist and lifting her up so her eyes were directly in line with my own. "I'd like to treat you the way I should have in the first place," I replied as I looked down at her mouth.
Her lips parted on a gasp and I took that as her permission. I pulled her to me, licking my lips to moisten them before brushing them across hers. I held my breath as we kissed gently and shyly. I felt her tiny arms wrap around my shoulders and her legs locked around my waist, holding herself up on my body.
"It's like climbing a tree," she teased breathlessly when I broke the kiss. I chuckled and dove back in, kissing her deeper this time.
"I want you to know how beautiful you are, Alice. Inside and out," I whispered into her neck as I laid kisses there.
My blood heated when I saw the hickey I'd left her with. The primal possessive part of me roared in satisfaction, but the gentleman in me felt disappointed in such tendencies. My hands rubbed up and down her back soothingly as I continued to kiss her.
I walked us to my bed and laid her down softly. She smiled up at me wistfully as I came down on top of her, trapping her beneath my much larger body. "Is this okay?" I asked her.
Alice nodded, her eyes glowing. She wrapped herself around me, bringing me against her tightly. "Are you going to make love to me, Jasper?" she whispered.
I nodded, my lips brushing across her face, neck, and collarbone. I breathed deeply and the warm scent of lilacs and roses surrounded me, reminding me of summertime. Alice's bright smile was the sun, and her brilliant blue eyes were the same as a cloudless blue sky enveloping me and bringing peace and joy.
I smoothed my hands across her shoulders and down to the hem of her shirt, silently asking for permission to continue; Alice nodded and smiled dreamily. I pulled the soft material up slowly, kissing the exposed flesh as I went.
Alice's hands began an exploration of their own, and soon we were both naked in our embrace. I felt every inch of her precious body squeezed against mine on the bed, and I wouldn't have had it any other way. The fan on my desk was on, and it blew across our exposed bodies as we moved together.
There were no words to describe the feelings between us in this moment. Her eyes were full of a thousand smiles as we held each other silently. I couldn't breathe as I gazed at her, my heart swelling to nine times its normal size.
The minutes wore on, and we kissed and explored every inch of each other. I learned that Alice was most ticklish right above her hipbones, and she discovered the piercing I'd never told anyone about. Her tiny hands glided over me with grace and patience, and mine held her face close as I kissed her as deeply as I could.
When we joined together, it was stars and satellites and supernovas. My world fell down around me as I found the true home I'd been waiting for in this petite little package currently wrapped around me.
Alice's gasps and sighs mixed with my moans, filling the room with the sounds of this enormous experience. We moved as one, complete in each other as I whispered in her ear, telling her all the ways I wanted to make her happy.
Her tears washed over us, bathing me in her redemption. I felt cleansed as she clenched around me, bringing my focus to the center of our universe when we both exploded as one. I held on for dear life as we shot across the sky like a shooting star, lighting up the night with our exhilaration.
In the aftermath, we lay there quietly; who needed words when touch could suffice? I knew that this was love, and it was the kind that would burn in me forever.
I dozed off for awhile, my arms anchoring Alice to my side. I awoke to the feel of Alice's fingers running through my hair.
"Did I forget to mention that your roommate and mine hooked up last weekend?" she asked when I opened my eyes.
"What? How do you know about this?" I asked, even though I probably shouldn't have been so surprised, considering what Rosalie had told me coupled with Edward's conspicuous absence this week.
"Rose and I walked in on them. It was pretty disgusting, but I'm happy for her. That girl needed to get laid!" she laughed.
"Huh," was all I said in reply.
We spent the rest of the day making love and talking, and I learned more about Alice in that afternoon than I'd ever known about another girl in my life (well, except for my twin).
I watched her sleep, her face tranquil. I wanted to do something sweet for her, but I couldn't think of anything that wouldn't be totally cheesy. I racked my brain for a good thirty minutes, weighing the pros and cons of all things mushy and romantic.
My eyes landed on a book that Edward had brought home a couple days ago, and I smiled. Inside were weird drawings, but the little stories were really sweet. It might cost me my man card, but I wasn't above risking pussydom for this amazing girl asleep in my arms.
I carefully maneuvered my way out of the bed and tiptoed across the room quietly. Finding a piece of paper and a pen, I flipped through the book until I found one passage that I recalled from the other day. I scribbled it onto the page and folded it up, writing Alice's name on the outside.
I put the note on the bed and got dressed as quickly as possible. I then left the room stealthily to go in search of food to bring back for when my sleepy goddess awoke.
APOV
I woke alone in Jasper's bed, the dorm room dark and cold. I shivered and huddled under the blankets, bringing his empty pillow to my face so I could inhale his clean scent. A piece of paper crinkled as I did so, and I sat up, curious.
I reached over to switch the lamp on and saw the note with my name scrawled across the front. I smiled and opened it up, my eyes scanning the words.
Tears filled my eyes as I read the piece I knew to be one of Brian Andreas' stories. Jasper brought it to life with the sentiment I knew was behind it:
"Today all I could remember was the way
your body held the ocean of myself & for a
moment there was only one us in all
creation."
I love you, Alice.
- Jasper
A few tears escaped as I clutched the note to my chest, vowing to keep it forever. I jumped a bit when the door opened and Jasper came creeping in with a paper bag in his hand. "Hey," I said softly when he closed the door behind him.
Jasper turned to look at me and saw the note in my hands. He seemed to blush and fidget, and I wondered if he felt awkward over leaving it for me. "Hey. I see you got my note. Listen, I know it's a little early for me to be saying those kinds of things, but I really think..."
I leaped from the bed and tossed myself at him, my fingers shushing his lips before he could finish. I smiled at him brilliantly.
"I love you too, Jasper."