A / N : If you thought Goyle Sr was weird . . . . . . um, this one is even weirder. I honestly have no idea what inspired this. It began simply as a play on the common perception of Crabbe and Goyle as being, well, stupid. And somehow, it morphed into a stalkerish tale of unrequited romance. It's a little scary. The constant repetition of the word "stupid" is intentional but also very annoying, so sorry about that. There's also some language in this one, though hopefully nothing bad enough to bump my teen rating up. Let me know what you think, as always, and remember that just like Goyle before it, this one is about Crabbe Senior, the father of the Crabbe in Draco's era. Okay, read on, creep yourselves out, question my sanity . . . . etc. Let me know what you think.
Crabbe Sr
He hates it, here.
Actually, he hates it everywhere.
Hogwarts, that stupid school, where they all laughed at him for being stupid. He can see their faces now. Stupid kids.
Stupid home, with a stupid wife, who calls him stupid, and says he's passed all his stupidness on to their son.
Stupid son, who never does well at anything and just proves his stupid mother right.
Stupid Lucius Malfoy, who always has to be so smart, and always makes Crabbe feel so dumb, giving orders as if that's the way it ought to be, just because he was born smart and Crabbe was born stupid.
Stupid Bellatrix, with her crazy crush on the Dark Lord, running after him like a stupid little girl, doing anything he wants her to, as if that will make him love her. Even Crabbe, who she calls stupid ten times a week, knows that you can't make someone love you. You can make them listen to you, if you shout at them. You make them hurt, with a blow, with a curse. There are ways to make them sleep with you. But he has never heard of a way to make someone really love you, and he's fairly sure that's because it doesn't exist. Stupid Bellatrix. Every time she throws the word at him, he laughs a little, inside, because she's so stupid she won't ever wonder what he thinks about. She won't ever see the words he doesn't say. Stupid bitch. Stupid whore. Stupid pretty, crazy, stupid girl, who never paid him any attention, because he's too stupid for her to notice, and she's too stupid to care about anyone besides her precious master, and too stupid to see what everyone else can see – that he doesn't care about her. Maybe he doesn't even like her. Yeah. Maybe he doesn't even like her. Stupid Bellatrix.
Stupid Lestrange, losing his temper and going crazy at everyone else all the time because he was stupid enough to marry her.
Stupid Wormtail, not even a Death Eater, really, just a sneak and a traitor and a rat. That was what Bellatrix called him. A rat. She always calls him that. And everyone laughs. Everyone laughs when she wants them to, and when she doesn't want them to, they don't. It's like a new magic, all of her own.
Stupid Bellatrix, with her stupid magic ways and her stupid words and her stupid way of not paying attention to anyone who's too stupid for her to listen to.
Stupid wife, always calling him stupid too. Well, we'll see who's stupid, won't we, when her stupid head hits the wall.
Stupid Bellatrix, locked up in Azkaban for years, screaming her stupid, silent screams on the front of the Daily Prophet, so that they leap off the page and bury into his skull and at night all he can hear is stupid Bellatrix, and her stupid screams for someone who won't ever love her back. Because she'll always be just a little bit too stupid.
Stupid Bellatrix, too stupid to get caught with everyone else at the Ministry, so stupid their master had to save her specially.
Stupid cell. Stupid women. Stupid life.
Stupid knuckles, bleeding as he splits them open on stupid stone.
Stupid.