Okay, I'm begging you to not be angry with my lack of updates. I keep getting new ideas and start them - then forget what happens next and have to leave it. I am working on Chapter 6...but I think I'm going to have to chose one story to focus on right now. I'll probably do this one, simply because I'm the farthest from the end, but I haven't decided yet.

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT

Chapter 4: First Beach

I smiled at him politely, and made a move to pass him and go change. His arm reached out and barred my way. I looked at him questioningly.

He was staring at me, his eyes and his face matching for the first time since I had seen him. He looked at me like he used to.

I stared at him in shock, surprised by the sudden change. He looked like he wanted to say something, but I cut him off with a finger against his lips.

"Edward," I started, looking at him, "I still love you and there's really nothing I can do about that, but you don't love me. I get that, and I'm willing to compromise. Renesmee has never known her father – it's always been me and her and Jake. She needs to know you, so I'm willing to let you stay and to be with her." His lips started to move under my fingertip, so I pinched it gently closed with my thumb as well. "You don't need to say anything. I'll be fine. We need to get to the beach before they start without us."

I walked past him and darted up the stairs and into my room. Though it killed me to admit it, Edward would have to stay. I would have to see him day after day and I would have to be careful not to push him. He didn't have to love me to love Renesmee.

I sighed and changed quickly into the swim suit I had thrown in on my way past the door. I looked for my t-shirt, but I didn't see it here. With a groan, I realized I had only pulled out my swim suit and had forgotten the shirt. I didn't want to ruin another shirt, so I peeked out into the hall.

I didn't see Edward, so I darted out and quickly ran towards the spare bedroom, where I promptly ran into Edward's chest. I leaped back, alarmed, then I realized that he would have needed to pick out swim trunks too.

He seemed very surprised to see me, and even more surprised to see me half naked. I ducked past him as quick as I could and roughly pulled open the dresser drawer, making it fly all the way out. I growled a bit and set in on the bed, quickly finding the shirt and pulling it on as fast as I could, acutely aware of Edward watching me. If I had still been human, my face would have set a record.

I shoved the drawer back into the dresser and turned to face him like nothing had happened. "Ready to go?" I asked, fully taking in the picture of Edward in swim trucks. If I hadn't already seen him naked I would have had to ogle.

He smiled my favorite lop-sided grin and said "Yes" quietly. I nodded and pretended to be indifferent to him as I shooed him out of the room and turned off the lights.

I ran out the front door, hearing Edward catch up instantly and drawing level. I didn't respond to his presence, but pretended to make light conversation. "So, where have you been in the last century? Africa? South America?"

I chuckled a bit at my pathetic attempt, but answered anyway. "We lived in Europe for a bit, then Alaska, then Asia." I nodded. "You?"

"We mostly move around Seattle and the areas surrounding Forks. I like to stay near the Rez." Our conversation lulled, petering into an uncomfortable silence. I was glad when we made it to First Beach.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that Emily had dropped by her house and grabbed an acoustic guitar for Renesmee for later.

I was greeted by a chorus of "Bella"s and "Bell"s, making me grin broadly, carefully tucking my feelings away. I greeted them loudly and waved as we approached.

"Ready to go cliff diving, Bells?" Asked Jake, grinning and pulling me into a bear hug.

"Absolutely." I said, grinning at him and lining up at the edge with the rest of the group. I looked at sideways and smiled at the weirdness of it all. Every few brown skinned guys, there was a spot of snow white, making the vampires stand out in stark contrast. Our skin sparkled slightly as the sun slowly sank towards the horizon, but I wasn't concerned; there was no one around to see it.

"On three." Called Jake, grinning as he turned his attention to the water below, which had turned a deep navy blue as the sun was half missing.

"One…two…three!" We all leaped, letting the air rush past my ears and energize my body with the adrenaline rush. We all hit the water at different times, Jake hitting before I did. He was taller.

We all stayed underwater for a second, letting the water silence the world. Jake went up before I did; he needed air and I didn't. Instead I swam down and found the bottom, crouching on it and forming myself into an arrow. I exerted as much force as I was capable of, cracking the bottom slightly as I launched towards the surface.

I flew out of the water and about halfway up the cliff, then I reached out and grabbed a rock that was jutting out, using it as leverage to crawl up the face of the cliff. I emerged at the top before anyone else, laughing as Jake and the werewolves muttered about cheating and the vampires chuckled at my display.

I walked up to Esmé and Carlisle – who were sitting on the logs around the fire at a safe distance – grinning. I sat down beside Esmé and watched Emmett appear first, closely followed by Jake and the rest. They were all wet and laughing. I even saw Paul jab Jasper in a playful punch and Jasper grin back. It almost felt like a family.

Sam and Emily were swaddled in blankets closer to the fire and were laughing at us. Renesmee did her best to look indignant, then walked up to them and shook her wet hair out right above them and burst out laughing as they cringed from the water. They laughed even harder when she shook herself like a dog.

As the evening passed I saw them get more and more familiar with the Cullens. Esmé and Emily talked and laughed about something while Emmett and Paul mocked each other, Jasper and Embry found it incredibly funny to both liked to play small pranks throughout the evening. Even Rose took a liking to verbally fighting with Jake. They were like a brother and sister, but with just a little more animosity.

Soon we all settled down to dry beside the fire and talk. We used all of the blankets, much to the surprise of Esmé, and all sat down together. I hadn't really taken a notice of the werewolf smell, but I was so used to it, it didn't matter – Rosalie, however, refused to touch one that smelled like 'wet dog', so we ended up giving her the one that I had held closest to my body when I carried them.

When we were all settled, Emily pulled out the guitar and offered it to Renesmee, who smiled and took it. I protected all our thoughts, wanting us all to be surprised by the song. She started to sing the song that she had based on what I had told her about Edward. Her voice flitted through the words, making them sound perfect. She was a very good singer.

(Our Song by Taylor Swift)

I was riding shotgun with my hair undone in the front seat of his car
He's got one-hand feel on the steering wheel
The other on my heart
I looked around, turn the radio down
He says baby is something wrong?
I say nothing I was just thinking how we don't have a song
And he says...

[Chorus]
Our song is the slamming screen door,
Sneakin' out late, tapping on your window
When we're on the phone and you talk real slow
Cause it's late and your mama don't know
Our song is the way you laugh
The first date "man, I didn't kiss her, and I should have"
And when I got home ... fore I said amen
Asking God if he could play it again

I was walking up the front porch steps after everything that day
Had gone all wrong and been trampled on
And lost and thrown away
Got to the hallway, well on my way to my lovin' bed
I almost didn't notice all the roses
And the note that said...

[Repeat Chorus]

I've heard every album, listened to the radio
Waited for something to come along
That was as good as our song...

Cause our song is the slamming screen door
Sneaking out late, tapping on his window
When we're on the phone and he talks real slow
Cause it's late and his mama don't know
Our song is the way he laughs
The first date "man, I didn't kiss him, and I should have"
And when I got home,fore I said amen
Asking God if he could play it again

I was riding shotgun with my hair undone
In the front seat of his car
I grabbed a pen and an old napkin
And I... wrote down our song.....

She let the last chord ring, smiling slightly and watching Edward's reaction. I tactfully avoided the eyes of everyone there and stared at the fire instead. When the silence became uncomfortable, Renesmee started a different song. She chose one we all knew, encouraging us to sing along.

After we got a bit, people started dropping off to sleep. Renesmee came to sit by me and she was soon asleep with her head in my lap.

I smiled as I watched her sleep, completely hypnotized. The first time I had watched Renesmee sleep I had understood why Edward had chosen to stay while I slept. I didn't realize anyone had approached until he spoke, sitting Indian style across from me.

"She's beautiful when she's asleep. Same as her mother." I smiled up at Edward, then went back to stroking her cheek and hair. I would've blushed if I could.

"She looks just like her dad, too." I smiled a bit at him, and he grinned.

"Bit of a shame she doesn't talk in her sleep like you. I would've enjoyed that." He replied. I smiled and picked up her hand, careful not to wake her, and set it against his cheek. He smiled and reached up, securing both of our hands there and closing his eyes. I didn't pay attention to the other vampires in the clearing that were probably watching, just letting myself feel.

We stayed like that for a bit, my skin almost vibrating with the pleasure of touching him again. "That song she played," Edward said, opening his eyes to look at me. "Did she base it on something?"

I nodded, regretfully sliding my hand out from under his and returning it to Renesmee's face, stroking her soft cheek and looking at her face. "Yes."

Edward waited for me to continue, so I complied, deciding to tell the truth. "She based it on everything I've told her about how we met and after that. She created it when she was about six years old."

I didn't take my eyes off Ren's face, dropping the conversation there. We sat there all night, watching our daughter sleep.