Another chapter! Thanks to everyone who reviewed! This story is just moving right along, and I don't plan on there being many more chapters. Probably two more. I hope you enjoy this one!
Three weeks. Another three weeks, and Brooke still hasn't left her house. She has no reason to; at least that's what she tells herself. All of the information she needs, everything she needs, is somewhere in her house. Mainly, on her computer. More people have come to visit, and even Owen has come back for her. They all look at her suspiciously, but never question what is going on. Haley explains Nathan's new career in Slam Ball, and Nathan asks her to make some capes for him. Jamie tries to cheer her up, and Peyton tries to be her best friend. None of it matters though, because in a few weeks, all of it will be left behind.
Lucas still comes over every day, even though she thinks it's pointless. She doesn't need his help. She's eating on her own now, and dressing when she wants to. He tries to get her to shower more, and maybe even get out some, but she ignores him. So, instead, he does her dishes, and laundry. Cleans up after her, and basically makes sure she's not lying about eating. Every day before and after work he's there. She wonders what Peyton thinks about him spending so much time at her house. But, she doesn't care enough to ask. She's not even sure Lucas tells Peyton he's going to her house so much.
She's still determined to have his baby, and once she's found out she's with child, she'll go tell her mom she's selling her the company. All of it. She can have it. Then, she can disappear. Just her and her child. She'll say goodbye to her life in Tree Hill forever. She's not even sure if she's sad about it. There's not much she will miss, not when all of it ends in heartache.
Peyton has asked her to make her wedding dress for her, and she's agreed to do it. Not a single thread has been sewn yet, and she probably won't get started on it. How can she design a wedding gown for a wedding she doesn't believe in? When she knows that the marriage isn't going to last. Lucas is a cheater. Always has been, and always will be. Peyton will find out about Brooke, and if she's smart, she will leave Lucas, too. Brooke just wishes she could watch Peyton's face when she is shown what has happened between Brooke and Lucas.
Lucas has been great since finding out about the beating, and she won't take that away from him. Part of her wants to let go, and just let him back in. But, the other part, that part that he has created, knows it's not plausible. Lucas will never be over Peyton, and Brooke will never be over Lucas. That's why she will take the only kind of piece of him she can, and keep it forever. Love it unconditionally. The way real love should be.
Tonight's the night, too. She's done her research. It's the best night for her. She's been eating healthy; doing everything she can to make her body ready. She thinks it may be better this way, instead of getting pregnant the last time, when her emotions were so full of rage and revenge, she wasn't sure she even deserved his child then.
After Owen showed back up, she even considered him as a possible father. He had great physical features, but none of the personality she wants. He ran out of town at the tiniest mention of her wanting a child, and he doesn't deserve Brooke carrying his child, even if he never knew about it. It's kind of pathetic how he is acting. Having Nathan come over to talk to her for him. Showing up at random times at her door. Most of the time, she just rolls her eyes and slams the door in his face. Lucas has even mentioned him sleeping out on her porch a couple of times. The guy really needs to take a hint.
Today, she's kind of bored. And that's a first since she's reduced herself to living in seclusion. But, she already knows everything that needs to be done, and she's ready to set her plans into action. So, instead of sitting in front of the computer, she goes to her room and starts searching through her clothes. About half-way through looking for an outfit, she gets frustrated. She has too many clothes. One by one, she starts pulling articles of clothing out of the closet and throwing them on the bed. Her closet is only as half as full as it was before when she's done. Then, she goes over to the pile of clothes, and sorts through them, pulling out the fabrics she could use, and the ones she can't. She puts all of the ones she can't use into a garbage bag, and takes the others into her spare room so she can use them for later. She looks down at herself, and remembers why she had started going through the closet in the first place. She's only in a button-up shirt that Lucas must have some how mixed into her laundry the last time he did it. Why he would be doing his own laundry at her house is beyond her. It's almost time for Lucas to be there, so she gets everything ready. He walks in before she can go and change.
"Brooke," he calls out for her. "I think Owen was here again, there was a note left on your door. Brooke?"
"In here," she calls out.
He finds her in the kitchen. And she's gorgeous. His mouth drops the instant he sees her. She's only wearing his button up shirt. A white one. And she's not wearing a bra. Her hair is down, hanging loosely over her shoulders. She has no make-up on. And he instantly goes hard. How can he not when she's looking so sexy? She's standing over the stove, placing a pan onto a burner. One of her bare feet is flat against the floor, while the other is propped up on the toes. Her smooth legs are toned. He has to stop staring.
"Ah…hm," he tries to clear his throat, "uh, Brooke, you didn't get dressed today." He's not disappointed in the least this time. She's wearing his shirt.
"I was going to, but I ended up clearing out my closet instead," she explains.
"What are you making?" He tries to look over her shoulder.
"I don't actually know. I'm sure it won't turn out, whatever I decide to make," she shrugs.
"You can cook," Lucas tries to encourage her. "You made food for me before. Remember, you made that pie."
"And I almost burnt the apartment down," she laughs. Lucas loves her laugh. She hasn't done it a lot in the past six weeks that he's been taking care of her. But, these past three weeks, she has improved so much. It may be only baby steps every day, but he's feeling so confident about her, he beams with pride every time he thinks about it.
"Hey, don't sell yourself short, Brooke. You can do a lot of things. You just have to want to," he smiles at her.
Brooke looks up at him, and gets caught up in his eyes. He's never been so encouraging before all of this happened, and she likes this side of him. And oh God, how she wishes her child gets those gorgeous blue eyes.
"So, what are you going to do about this Owen thing?" Lucas asks. He's trying to play coy, so he doesn't look desperate and jealous.
"Nothing," Brooke shrugs.
"Nothing?"
"Nah."
"Aren't you at least going to tell him to leave you alone?"
"If he hasn't gotten the hint by now, there's no point."
"You don't like him?"
"I did, before he left because I was adopting Angie. Now, he can go to hell."
"You don't want to give him a second chance?"
"Lucas, you of all people should know second chances don't work with me, and besides, why are you so interested? Trying to pawn off babysitting duties? I've never once asked you to be here, you know."
Her green eyes meet his blue ones, and there's a fire there. An anger. He knows it's better than the empty, shallow greens from before, but this is kind of scary. "No, you know I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be. I care about you, Brooke, that's why I am here every day."
"Whatever," she rolls her eyes. She hates when he goes into those talks about how much he cares for her. So, instead of waiting for him to start, she starts to leave the room. Her night can't be ruined.
"I mean it," he grabs her by the arm as she's trying to pass by him. And she feels trapped between him and the wall. "Brooke, I know I have a weird way of showing it, and I've never really been the best when it came to things like this, but, I do. I care about you a lot. More than I should probably."
"A little too late, aren't you?"
"I've always been late when it came to you, Brooke," he whispers.
She closes her eyes, and breathes in deeply. She knew she should make the most out of his vulnerable state, but she can't bring herself to press her lips against him. She's too afraid.
"Look at me," he demands, and she obeys. Green once against meets blue, and they seem to mix, as if you couldn't see where one started or one ended. "I know I've messed up a lot with you, Brooke. But, I'm going to prove it to you. I will. I'm going to take my time, and I'm going to do it right."
She shakes her head. "No, no, Lucas, no. It's not right, it will never be right."
By now, the flesh of his hand seems to be burning a hole through the skin on her arm, and she can barely breathe. She doesn't want this, nor need this. He's testing her heart, and she can't have him do that. She's already made up her mind. She knows what needs to be done.
"It can be, Brooke."
"Lucas, you're with Peyton. You will always be with Peyton."
"But, I want to be with you," his voice is low, and hoarse, and he ends by pressing his warm lips against the soft skin of her neck.
She doesn't respond to his words, but she responds to the feeling he is giving her by placing kiss along her jaw line. She lets her head fall to the side, and lets a soft moan escape her lips. His hand finally releases her arm, and he presses both hands onto her hips. He pulls her so they're closer together, so that their torsos are touching.
"Wait," Brooke breathlessly objects against his lips, "you can't-" he presses his lips against hers, "you can't want to be with me," she's pressing her hands into his abs, trying to push him back.
"I do," he says back, pressing his lips harder against hers.
"Enough to let her go?" Brooke pulls her head back, and he looks up into her eyes. "Enough to never want to be with her again?" His eyes narrow, and the lust that once filled them is now fading away. Her green eyes stare through him, piercing his soul. Begging, pleading with him to say "yes, she's all he needs," but, also begging and pleading with him to say "no, he could never leave Peyton." She's scared. He can see it in her.
"That's what I thought," she whispered, pushing him completely away. She knew she shouldn't be, but somewhere, deep down, she's so hurt and disappointed by his non-answer. The part of her that will always be in love with him. She should be relieved he didn't answer, hell, she should be jumping for joy. Now, she could just get what she wants, and get the hell out of town. But, as she turns to walk away from him, she can't fight back the single tear the rolls down her cheek.
"Brooke," he finally speaks. Seeing her walk away from him once again, is giving him an ache in his heart, one that is all too familiar. "Brooke, I want to."
Brooke stops, and shakes her head. "Want to?" She flips around. "Want to! Are you kidding me?"
"It sounds bad, but Brooke, please, just let me explain," he goes to her, and grabs her hands.
"Explain what?" She shakes her hands from his. "That you've always said the right words, but never meant them! That you can't ever be with me because your heart always belongs to her!"
"No!" Lucas stops her. "No! It doesn't always belong to her."
"This is pointless, Lucas," Brooke shakes her head. "I don't even care. I don't want to be with you. I haven't wanted to be with you for a very long time. This fight is meaningless."
"I know that's a lie," Lucas puts his hand to her cheek. "I know that's not true."
"Oh, so now you're a mind reader?"
"No," Lucas shakes his head, "no, I can tell. When you kiss me, you're not kissing me like I'm just some guy. You really kiss me."
"Oh? Is that right? So you've actually been around when I've just kissed some guy and know how I kiss when I do it?"
"I know you feel it."
"Feel what?" She shrieks. "Anyway, how can you stand there and talk to me about this when you're engaged to someone else! To my best friend!"
"She's not your best friend," Lucas shakes his head, and takes a step back.
"Yeah, because of you!"
"No, not because of me," Lucas sighs, and rubs the back of his neck. "I mean, yeah, I came between you guys, but if it wasn't me, it would have been some other guy."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"How can you call someone who knows nothing about you your best friend? I've been more of your best friend this past month and a half than she has!" Lucas doesn't know why he's throwing Peyton under the bus. He loves her. At least, he thinks he does. But then again, he can't figure out how he can still love Peyton, when all he ever thinks about anymore is Brooke.
"I'm not talking to you about this. This is just..just, totally ridiculous. Peyton is your fiancée! How can you sit here and talk all this shit about Peyton, and then go home to her and sleep in the same bed as her! Is this how it was when you were with me and friends with Peyton?"
Brooke takes a step back. She can't be near him anymore. She can't hear his perfect words. She can't. Because she knows if she listens, her heart will start to flutter, and her mind will get all foggy. Her goal is to sleep with him, not fall in love with him. But he's making it so hard. And even though she's heard all of his words before, this time she can't help but feel that he means them. He's the only one of her friends that has taken the time to actually show concern, to take care of her. He's not there to go on about all of the drama in his life. He's not there to ask her a favor. He's not there to brag about anything in his life. He's there because he wants to be there. Because Brooke needs someone to take care of her. She'll never admit that, though.
"Brooke, it's-it's not like that," Lucas starts to rub his temples, looking away from her. How can he do this? How can he be in love with two women? Two women that claim to be best friends.
"Then how is it, Lucas?" Her voice is shrill, and her cheeks are starting to get pink. And Lucas can't help but want her even more. "Because this thing with you going back and forth forever doesn't work! You can't ask one of us to marry you, and then claim you want to be with the other!"
"Why are you so mad at me?" Lucas asks, calmly, curiously.
"What?" Brooke asks as if it's the stupidest question she's ever been asked.
"I don't know why you are so mad. You're here, with me. If you really didn't want me here, you'd call the cops or something. I don't think that's it though. You're the one who started it that night we were together."
"Don't." Brooke shakes her head. "Don't start placing blame, Lucas. You're just as much at fault as I am."
"I'm not saying that. I want to know why you are getting so mad about it. Is it because you want to be with me too?"
"Ha!" Brooke scoffs. "I gave up on you a long time ago, Lucas. I let you go, so you could be with Peyton. I've learned to live with that." She's shaking, trembling. Why is he so good at reading her these days?
"But did you stop loving me?" Lucas asks, inching towards her. She's backing away, petrified.
"Stop," she whispers. "Just stop. You can't ask me that."
"Why? Why can't I? Are you, Brooke? Are you still in love with me?"
She's against the wall now, and she can feel the air being sucked out of the room. Her chest is heaving, and her tiny hands are gripping the plaster behind her. He can't ask her this, because she can't answer him. He's getting closer to her, and her heart is beating through her rib cage.
Lucas has never seen someone so sexy before. Her erect nipples poked through his white button down, as her chest heaved before him. Her legs were flexed against the wall. Her face is flushed, and her lips are parted. So, he takes his opportunity and presses his mouth against hers.
She doesn't respond at first. She can't respond. She's pretty much paralyzed by that point, but the sensation of his lips on hers wakes her up, and it's not long before her lips work his vigorously. She needs this. She needs him. He presses his body against her, pinning her more against the wall. Her arms wrap around his neck. His hands grip her ass. They work their way up, until his thumbs loop inside the elastic of her panties, and with a slight tug, they fall to the floor. He brings his hand to the front, and slips it between her legs, basking in her moist hotness.
Brooke wants him now. No foreplay. No messing around. Just him inside her, and now. She brings her hands down and undoes his zipper before frantically pushing his jeans towards the floor. He's surprised by her vigor, but turned on even more.
"Now, Lucas, now," she pants.
"Mmm," he moans against her mouth. "Not yet." He pulls back from her, and suddenly she feels empty. She's about to ask him why, and beg him to not stop, but he brings his hands up, and tears apart the buttons on the top of the shirt, and her breasts fall into display. "Mmm," he moans again, and then takes one in his mouth, while gripping the other. Brooke gasps, and she arches her breasts towards him in response.
He kneads and sucks on her, until he's satisfied. He pulls back, and attaches his mouth to hers once again. Then, effortlessly, he grabs her ass again, and lifts her up. Out of instinct, she wraps her legs around his hips. He's deep within her before either realizes it. He nuzzles his face into her neck, and starts to chant her name. He pulls back and pushes back in slowly, deeply. He wants to feel her, all of her, and he wants to make sure she feels all of him. Their bodies are tightly wrapped together as slowly his hips pump against hers. Her hips meet his with each thrust, and he's allowed even more access to her depths.
"Fuck, Brooke," he grunts. He pulls his face out of her neck, and presses his lips hard against hers. Their tongues meet, but only briefly, as their lips mesh together once again.
"Lucas," she gasps, "oh god, Lucas." He's going slowly, and she likes it. Usually, she wants it hard, and fast, but he's getting so deep within her, she feels a new sensation every time he presses into her. As if he's reaching places that have never been reached before.
"Come for me, baby," Lucas begs.
"I'm-I-I'm going to," she stutters, waves of euphoria wracking her body. "C-Come with me."
"I can't, ugh, I-I have to p-pull out."
"No, no. Don't. Come with me."
Lucas grunts, but doesn't stop. He's getting close, and he's hoping she is too. He won't be able to last much longer without stopping. And he doesn't want to stop.
"Lucas!" She screams. "Oh my god! Ugh! I'm going to-"
That's all he needs to hear, and with one last thrust into her, they both climax, screaming, clawing at each other. His thrusts quicken as he finishes them both off. As he stops, she pulls back from him, releasing him, and then lets her legs fall to floor. Her knees are weak, and she almost collapses, but Lucas catches her, and they both slowly go to the floor. Neither can talk because they are both so out of breathe.
"Are-are you on the pill?" Lucas asks when he finally catches his breath. He's been curious since the first time they were together, but so long had passed, and he would have known by now if she had gotten pregnant, and she hadn't.
"What?" She asks, not wanting to answer the question.
"Are you, um, on any birth control?" He turns towards her.
"You're asking now?" She reaches across his body for her panties.
"It's just that, you've said it was okay for me to, you know, come inside you, so I just assumed that you were." He feels awkward talking to her about this. Like he's still in high school.
"So, why are you asking then," she puts her feet through the holes in her underwear and starts to pull them up her legs.
"I just-I guess-I don't know. For peace of mind, maybe?" He grabs his boxers and starts to put them on.
"What if I wasn't? Would it be so horrible if I were to get pregnant?"
"I mean, I guess not, but, right now wouldn't be the right time really. Not with everything going on."
"You guess not?"
"It would be kind of-" he shakes his head. He can't want that. He's engaged to someone else. "I mean, I do want kids. And you would make a good mom. I just, I don't think the timing is right, do you?"
"Don't worry, Lucas," Brooke pats his leg, "you don't have any worries here. There will be no baby momma drama coming from me."