A/N: Sorry once again for my lateness. I'll try to update often as possible cosidering my circumstances of trying to pass my exams.
Hope you guys enjoy x
Chapter 23 - Lost Cause
The Disney Channel
Requests your Presence at it's
First Annual Christmas Ice Ball
At 7pm on December 1st, 2008
Sleeping Beauty's Castle, Disneyland,
Anaheim California
He looked down at the invitation with a sigh and a shake of his head. An annual Christmas ball was something that he hadn't expected from them. He'd expected necessary kindness and maybe forcing them to all like each other again… but he'd never expected them to flaunt it in front of a few dozen paparazzi how awkward their world was at the moment. He'd never expected them to get press coverage from the fact that there machine wasn't as well oiled as they liked everyone to believe that it was. He could imagine what this night was going to be like already.
Demi would be there and she would be fine with everyone… all the people from the shows Nick didn't know would be friends with her and they would all be laughing and joking because that was the way that Demi was. She was friends with everyone… she always tried to make everyone okay with each other. Emily and Mitchell would be there and they would be pretending that they weren't totally into each other and would probably spend the whole night talking to each other and Miley. Jason would be there with his wife and everyone would still be as confused as ever about how old he actually was. All the younger kids would be fooling around… Dylan and Cole would be pulling pranks only for David to get mad and nearly kick their asses. Kevin would be there with Danielle… Joe would be there with Mandy… Lena would have every single camera in the place on her as she spent the night dancing away with Justin… and Miley would be there and she would ignore the new couple like she was meant to. Then she would see him across the room and she would ignore him and his whole world, that from that moment would be fragmented… just as it should have been…
"There's something different about you lately…"
Nick turned around and smiled at his brother. Joe was as handsomely dressed as ever in a grey tuxedo, crisp and clean cut. He smelt disgustingly perfect, shaven and without a hair out of place. His arms were folded and Nick knew he would regret it as his suit would only become crumpled. At the moment he didn't seem to care and Nick didn't want to make a point. He was just pleased that his brother was being kind to him again, not just civil, but kind. They were talking, but not as much as they used to. They were laughing together and he was able to be in the same room without being disgusted. Out of all of his efforts to be a good person again, Joe was his biggest success. He'd told the truth and he'd still held onto his brother… his best friend.
"I have new deodorant…" Nick shrugged, "Mom couldn't find my other one in the store so -"
"I'm not talking about your deodorant, Nick…" Joe laughed and he moved closer to him, staring at him carefully in confusion. Something was entirely different, but completely welcome. Joe hadn't been able to put his finger on it for weeks but it had always been there. He hadn't been able to put his finger on it since they'd come back from London. There was something wrong… or right… with his younger brother.
"Then what?"
Joe shook his head, "You seem… better…" he nodded, "Focussed…"
Nick twitched his brow as he nodded, turning to grab cufflinks from his dresser, "You could say that…"
Joe smiled and stepped forward again, closer so he could talk softly and not let anyone hear, "Why do you keep sending packages to Miley? I found the delivery notices."
Nick lifted his head and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes and shook his head. When had the time come that he couldn't put anything past Joe? He used to be able to do anything and Joe would never ever know about it. How had everything changed? Why was everything feeling so much better? He had good feelings about tonight…
"It was… just some stuff I thought she might like…" Nick smiled, "Nothing important…"
Joe let out a chuckle before stopping himself, "So important that you thought she might have liked it express delivered to her hotel room in London?"
Nick blushed and shook his head, grabbing his navy blue tie and throwing it around his neck expertly, not even looking as he began to fasten it up to his collar, "What's your point here, Joseph?"
Joe moved swiftly over to Nick's bed and sat down gently on his dark blue sheets, "Why are you doing all these things for Miley?" he asked quietly with care for both involved, "Why do you care so much when she's as good as slapped it in your face that she's never going to give you another chance?" He shrugged, "I honestly don't see the point in you wasting your time, Nick?"
It was the content smile that spread across Nick's face that brought upon the moment in which Joe realised he had his old brother back. It was sparkle in his eyes and the gaze he settled on no where in particular in the material world that told Joe that the world in Nick's mind was the only one he was living in for the moment. The blush in his cheeks and the familiar peaking of the beaded bracelet under his sleeve that told him the only thing to know: His brother had returned and he had realised the one thing he needed to know. His baby brother had finally grown into a man.
Joe grinned and giggled in realisation, "You really are still in love with her, aren't you?"
Nick's chest puffed out as he took in a deep calming breath. It hurt him to know that no one believed him that he loved someone, and that he could lie about such a thing as deep and serious to him. However, the feeling that one person actually believed him overcame all of his anger, and he nodded slowly and surely until Joe's face softened.
"Really?" Joe whispered.
Nick nodded again and he thought of how much Joe cared about her and about how close they were. He wondered how much they told each other and if he would tell her this. He wondered if his feelings would become a joke and that he would be laughed at for weeks for caring about her. He didn't want the hardest feeling he'd ever felt, the worst and best in the world, to become the butt of tasteless jokes by his brother. He didn't want her to laugh at him.
"Are you gonna tell her?" he mumbled his fingers pausing at the knot around his neck, his arms suddenly dropping in realisation to his sides.
He was relieved when Joe shook his head, "No… it's not fair to force her to realise something that she has to realise on her own."
Nick's eyes glistened appreciatively and he moved to sit beside Joe on his bed. Joe slapped a hand onto his brother's knee forcing him to look around at him. He smiled supportively and Nick felt saddened emotion run through him mixed with shame and at the same time some endless hope that he was unable to seem to rid his mind of.
"We're a real pair aren't we…?" he mumbled shaking his head, "We always have to screw everything up before we can really fall in love… don't we?"
Joe wrapped his arm around his brother's shoulder and squeezed them gently, "Well if Miley's anything like her best friend… she realise sooner or later…"
Nick nodded, "I hope so…" he smiled sadly and for the first time ever, Joe's heart ached for his brother, "I just want her back in my life, Joe…" Joe watched as his brother's face changed. Each part mixing with the emotion of the words he'd been desperate to say to someone since he'd realised them himself. Nick gulped and his face hardened trying not to crack completely, "I miss her…"
Miley was stood in her pretty dress, with her pretty hair and her perfect make-up. Every part of her appearance was what it should have been - perfect… even down to the fake smile she plastered on her face.
She didn't feel perfect. She felt confused. She had no idea what was going on with her lately. She had no idea what was going on with anyone really…
Her mind switched from constantly thinking about why her father hated her to constantly thinking about why he wouldn't leave her alone and why she was slowly loosing the ability to care and was in fact beginning to embrace it. She would lay awake in bed at night wondering why men were only there in her life to make her confused and bring her pain. Most of the men she met only broke her heart. Even the ones who were meant to love her unconditionally, hated her guts and left her aching.
Pretty much everyone who she came in contact with recently had lied to her. There had been Justin who had lead her to believe that he'd been a broken hearted fool just like she was just so that he could steal her fame for his own benefit. Then there had been Selena who had been lying to everyone about what had happened with her and Miley's ex-boyfriend. Mandy and Joe hadn't been telling her half of the things they should have done. They told her that they were going out for dinner with friends instead of telling her that they were having dinner with Nick and his family and that's why they couldn't go out for ice cream. Everyone's phone calls seemed to have got shorter and shorter as most of them didn't want to talk to her about her father who she knew was still saying stuff about her behind her back. He was still seeing everyone in her family just as normal. Her mother lied about everything saying that there had been no one on the phone when it had really been her father from their home in Nashville. The first few times that he'd been back home and they hadn't told her about it… she'd kind of been okay with it. But when they waited until she was sleeping to go out for a family dinner, she'd cried herself into the sleep she'd faked to listen to them interact and be a family without her.
The one person she didn't want anywhere near her out of pure pain and confusion was the only one that was desperate to be near her… she'd never felt more alone in her life… all she wanted was someone to hold her.
Her life was messed up.
"So Mandy's going as Joe's date…?" her mother asked as she handed her the brand new dark blue coat she'd bought just for the occasion.
Miley simply nodded looking out of the window to see that they had arrived.
It was getting cold nowadays as they hit the first day of December and the days became shorter. The nights became longer and it just meant more hours of her laying awake at night convincing and chastising herself because her mind was having second thoughts about everything that he'd ever done, almost ready to forgive him. She constantly kept telling herself every minute of every day that he broke her. He broke her heart. He didn't deserve her forgiveness and she didn't want to give it to him… so much that she was slowly beginning to actually believe it. But she knew that she could never, ever go back to how it was with him. They would always argue. They were not the right fit… as much as deep down past her stubbornness, she kind of wanted to believe that they were like they used to be be. She wanted to believe that she had made the decision on her own to go against nature and not love him anymore. She wanted to believe that too much had changed now for them to ever be able to go back. It was too late.
She stepped out of the car and held the coat in her hands, smoothing out her beautiful dark dull blue dress with her soft subtle hands, catching the sight of the shiny blue nail varnish that had been painted onto her nails earlier that day especially to match with the rest of her outfit. Her hair was elegantly swept up from from her shoulders at the back of her head, the bobby pins her stylist had placed in it to keep it in place dug into her scalp as she fidgeted with it uncomfortably.
She didn't want to be there.
"Welcome Miss…" The old doorman said as he smiled at her and offered her his arm. She smiled and took it gladly as the camera's snapped away at her. She waved to them plastering on her fake smile and making her arms sparkle in faux happiness at being there. This was hell…
"Shirley Temple?" A waiter holding a tray of glasses asked her as she entered through the doors that similarly resembled the entrance to some creepy ice cave, leading into a room lit with sparkling blue and white lights, ice sculptures and Christmas trees placed everywhere. Snowflakes were covering the walls in decoration. The Waiters, dressed just like they had jumped out of a old fashioned fairytale of a Disney movie, walked amongst the well dressed guests with smiles and perfect faces offering drinks of Shirley Temples and Champagne to their guests. Ernie from Radio Disney was at the front of the smaller intimate room of guests playing all the Christmas classics that everyone loved to hear, random people were talking to him, requesting their favourite yuletide tracks. Tables surrounded the outer edge of the room, dressed in perfectly white silky tablecloths and pale blue napkins. Crystal wine glasses and pitchers of water littered them as plates waiting for food sat silently waiting for the diners to return to their tables.
She smiled noticing her two best friends and headed for them away from all the other guests that she couldn't be bothered to talk to today. They smiled as they saw her approaching into the darkness in which they sat talking to Kevin and Danielle and Mrs Jonas.
"Hey guys," she said as she collectively hugged them wrapping her arms around both their necks in one swift movement. They laughed as she let them go quickly embracing Joe's older brother, before enveloping their mother in a much needed hug.
"You look beautiful…" Denise said as she stood up and twirled Miley around as she giggled, "I love your dress…"
She giggled uncomfortably and relished the attention.
"You really do look beautiful, Miley…"
She spun around, and just like the icicles around the room she was frozen at the sight of him. She stared at him, pausing, her mouth agape with shock and confusion as he stared at her carefully. Her hands balled into the fabric of the coat that was still in her hands and she stuttered and spluttered the words that weren't coming from her mouth. They all looked at her in confusion. It was no match for the confusion she had of her own. For the first time in months she didn't want to shout at him or scream at him… she had nothing she needed to say. All she had was pathetic fear that made her take her next actions.
"Excuse me…" she mumbled quickly spinning around and heading the other way towards the bathroom she'd spotted on her way in. Mandy was quickly on her heals, Joe jumping up behind her to stand perfectly next to the one boy she was desperate to avoid.
Joe sighed and wrapped his arm around his brother's shoulder again and slapped him consolingly on the chest. Nick nodded. He was appreciative of Joe's pity.
"She's probably just embarrassed about how she was last week at the AMAs…" Joe mumbled so that no one important, including their mother heard them.
Nick smiled and looked around at Joe slightly, his eyes low and heavy in slight defeat, "This is a lost cause isn't it?"
Joe smiled at him and shrugged his shoulders letting out a chuckle.
"Probably…"
A/N: Hope you guys liked that. Another chapter's ready when you're prepared for it.
Probably not going to write anything new for a couple of months until exams are over and I'm FREE!!!! Only 6 weeks until I have Four months to myself!!!